FabSwingers.com forum: Confidence

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So I noticed something earlier on another thread and it piqued my curiosity into confidence, so for me I find confidence highly attractive I'm not talking arrogantly cocky confidence, but that self assured confidence, that somebody truly accepts themselves and is comfortable in there skin..

So two questions..

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

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By *weetkitten65Woman
over a year ago

Halifax

I think there is a very fine line between confidence & arrogance..

I myself am a confident lady happy in my own skin...& see myself as a leader rather than been bossy.

However been a confident woman seems to intimidate some men..because I say things as they are..go after what I want ( whether I get it us a different story

I am naturally flirty too which again some men find off putting :

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think there is a very fine line between confidence & arrogance..

I myself am a confident lady happy in my own skin...& see myself as a leader rather than been bossy.

However been a confident woman seems to intimidate some men..because I say things as they are..go after what I want ( whether I get it us a different story

I am naturally flirty too which again some men find off putting :

Confident, naturally flirty, straight to the point what's to find intimating

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan
over a year ago

Bradford

I'm confident with women and I admire and respect them i like confident women .bl but lot of women lack self confidencd. but I empower women to gain confidence in themself.

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

I have struggled with confidence, but I'm pretty comfortable now, so when I see other people with confidence issues it doesn't factor in how attractive I find them. I was where they were.

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By *essica FlabbitWoman
over a year ago

west midlands/shropshire

I'm fairly confident. I have my moments of insecurity but they soon pass. X

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By *jonesMan
over a year ago

Plymouth

I am naturally confident but can sometimes get down after some situations that arise from being a single guy in this alternative dimension ...mainly when folk are rude to me ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So I noticed something earlier on another thread and it piqued my curiosity into confidence, so for me I find confidence highly attractive I'm not talking arrogantly cocky confidence, but that self assured confidence, that somebody truly accepts themselves and is comfortable in there skin..

So two questions..

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

It's all about having sex appeal.

No matter what you look like you've either got it or you've not

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By *weetkitten65Woman
over a year ago

Halifax

"I think there is a very fine line between confidence & arrogance..

I myself am a confident lady happy in my own skin...& see myself as a leader rather than been bossy.

However been a confident woman seems to intimidate some men..because I say things as they are..go after what I want ( whether I get it us a different story

I am naturally flirty too which again some men find off putting :

Confident, naturally flirty, straight to the point what's to find intimating

I don't know

But some do..

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By *iromancergirl1Woman
over a year ago

bolton

I’m confident in person like at a club but on fab not as much.

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

I'm fairly confident and I find confidence attractive, it's a turn off if someone is constantly putting themselves down I think.

Having said that I think we all have days we aren't happy within ourselves and I was trying to take photos earlier and liked none of them so today was one of those days for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most of the time I’m just a fraction short of the confidence I need. That’s not always the case as there are occasions where I feel “on it”.

Confidence is sexy, but that’s not exclusively so, and arrogance is far from it and only fine margins sometimes separate the two

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Used to lack it very badly,but I'm extremely confident than I ever was. even to the point to help others whom lack seems to be a quick fix. Become more sociable approach anyone

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By *essica FlabbitWoman
over a year ago

west midlands/shropshire

"I’m confident in person like at a club but on fab not as much."

I'm the other way round lol

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By *iromancergirl1Woman
over a year ago

bolton

"I’m confident in person like at a club but on fab not as much.

I'm the other way round lol"
I think it’s because I feel like I come across better in person as in my personality I also think I look better in person not that I feel I look bad in my pictures just better in person.

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By *etterdays2021Man
over a year ago

PETERBOROUGH

Im cofident but im a shy person so i chat a lot to make me feel comfortable

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By *alleyDaveMan
over a year ago

Sheffield

"I think there is a very fine line between confidence & arrogance..

I myself am a confident lady happy in my own skin...& see myself as a leader rather than been bossy.

However been a confident woman seems to intimidate some men..because I say things as they are..go after what I want ( whether I get it us a different story

I am naturally flirty too which again some men find off putting :

When I joined Fab six months ago I was a very confident person,, now, six months down the line, my confidence is shot.

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By *weetkitten65Woman
over a year ago

Halifax

"I think there is a very fine line between confidence & arrogance..

I myself am a confident lady happy in my own skin...& see myself as a leader rather than been bossy.

However been a confident woman seems to intimidate some men..because I say things as they are..go after what I want ( whether I get it us a different story

I am naturally flirty too which again some men find off putting :

When I joined Fab six months ago I was a very confident person,, now, six months down the line, my confidence is shot. "

Sorry to hear that...

Maybe you should have a break from it?..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So two questions..

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

1 - Fairly

2 - Quite a bit, but as someone replied above, there’s a fine line. I’m starting to find people that can display confidence and being humble at the same time very attractive.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I’d say I’m confident based on my life experiences, seeing what you can do you take risks, persist and work hard. Not just career but relationships; fitness, helping others etc.

Confidence in others is ok, it makes conversations flow & interesting. Shyness can also be very attractive because it forces you to use genuine qualities

I don't find over confidence that attractive, humility is much more attractive but that’s rare ish on here. People generally seem over confident or insecure.

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

I'm over confident and can be cocky with it, which is unappealing to many under confident people

Generally I look for strong confident people on here, love a mental wit conflab with a cocky individual

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

I'm very confident and find confidence in others attractive x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm quietly assured. Know who I am, what I like/don't like. I don't need to impose my opinions on others or get anyone's approval - I am what I am and okay with that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine is slowly coming back, I used to be very confident but lost it all

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By *adyluck..Woman
over a year ago

West Yorkshire

Have to say I’ve gained my confidence with fab and clubs, it’s acceptance and if like ourselves with the flaws all good, no one is fully perfect

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Confident of my level….in differing aspects….I know where I sit…and that’s fine by me …. Sometimes it’s when pedestals are put in place that the confidence can waiver

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m confident in myself. That’s not coming from any point of thinking I’m attractive or charming or whatever, more a ‘fuck it I’ve got to get on with this’ mentality.

Certainly confidence is attractive in others, but too often it turns into overt demonstrations of arrogance and I really don’t like that.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I'm not overly confident in any areas of my life. Take my skill with words. I know I'm quite good with them. I also know I'm not the greatest wordsmith that ever lived. Some of my friends write in such a poetic way and yet; that's okay. I don't need to be the best.

I do have some insecurities - physically I know I'm not the most attractive. My face is okay, I've been trying to tell myself lately I'm pretty and sometimes I feel like that. But I'll never be a supermodel and I'm fine with that. I'd say I'm a work in progress, quietly confident in some aspects, aware I'm not the best/greatest in others. Working on myself. So neither confident or insecure overall, more me. A juxtaposition.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

im not confident, at all, in really any area of my life.

most of the time i'll gaslight myself into thinking that i am... a fake it til you make it sort of situation. but that's short lived. especially now.

i think self-assured confidence is so sexy on a person. like not to the point of cockiness or whatever.. but yeah. just having something about them.

i guess it's refreshing to have someone enter your life, however brief, that has a quality you don't.

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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes

Everything I do in this life I do with confidence.. don't listen to the oriole saying ohhhh it's arrogant to be that confident.. you have to believe in yourself in everything you do .. I've said this since I was a teenager I if I was in a plane crash I genuinely have no doubt whatsoever I'll survive.. you should never say negative things about yourself words have a stronger impact than people realise ..confidence is key strong positive attitude don't except weakness

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I had zero confidence for the first 50 years of my life and genuinely believed I was invisible.

A few things happened around the time I turned 50 that were like flipping a switch and I haven't looked back since.

I am quietly confident in myself and mostly happy with how I look.

Beforehand I had never taken my shirt off in public and now I'm more than comfortable posting naked pics on a site like this.

Some of that confidence has come from the help and support of close friends and it is my hope that I can help them instill a similar level of confidence in themselves.

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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes

"I had zero confidence for the first 50 years of my life and genuinely believed I was invisible.

A few things happened around the time I turned 50 that were like flipping a switch and I haven't looked back since.

I am quietly confident in myself and mostly happy with how I look.

Beforehand I had never taken my shirt off in public and now I'm more than comfortable posting naked pics on a site like this.

Some of that confidence has come from the help and support of close friends and it is my hope that I can help them instill a similar level of confidence in themselves. "

Good to hear that mate keep it going don't look back

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By *rontier PsychiatristMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Definitely something that's grown massively with life experience and age. Also understanding there's a reason behind my difficulties in social situations and reading people, which naturally causes anxiety in social situations. So managing that and becoming more adept in social environment results in more confidence and less anxiety (although it's still hard work). Also learning to give less fucks and live life my way, not someone elses model helps. And just knowing the things I've done, achieved and where I am in life gives me tangible evidence in myself and my success which obviously boost my confidence in myself.

With the above in mind it's no wonder many women seek older guys because a lot of deep confidence and self assurance come with age.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

1. Very

2. Not very. I prefer them to have Daddy issues, be broken and vulnerable!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm reasonably confident in myself. But things could be better. I do well in some areas and have a lot of faith in myself, but fail miserably and don't particularly shine in other areas. I've learned to stop giving a shit what other people think, and that's definitely made a big difference in my attitude towards life and my confidence.

When it comes to my appearance, I wouldn't say I'm confident but I'm comfortable enough. I hate my face and some parts of my body, but I'm just trying to get on with it now as I've spent so much of my life thinking my appearance somehow makes me worthy. Changing my mindset, and again, caring less about about people think has helped.

I find confidence very attractive. I love when someone is self-assured and has a lot of faith in who they are and what they are capable of. I hate arrogance, but it's usually easy to spot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not at all confident in myself but find it the sexiest trait in others

As others said the difference between confidence and arrogance is so clear

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

OP to answer your questions I am 100% comfortable within my own skin now but that has taken me all my life to get to. I always thought I should conform to something I’m clearly not but now I just love being me. I’m only ever going to be me so I’ve learnt to love being unique.

As for confidence I am confident in most situations, not all. I do really appreciate when others aren’t and will always help them to feel comfortable. As long as they are being their true selves then that is what I find most attractive about a person. It’s very easy for me to see when someone is not being themselves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1. I’d say 97% of the time I’m confident in myself but we all have those moments of doubt and we are always our own worst critic.

2. Confidence is very sexy to me but there is always a tight line between confidence and arrogance.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

1. Very

2. Not very. I prefer them to have Daddy issues, be broken and vulnerable!

Answer to number 2 made me laugh out loud...

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

So two questions..

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

"
I'm very confident but a polite confidence not an in your face confidence, i like confident people, i like chatty people, i like personality

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm very confident. Sometimes I probably come across as cocky.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I used to be very unconfident person in my early 20's. Over the years I've been learning to love all my flaws and imperfections. I definitely feel stronger and more confident than I've ever been in my own skin.

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By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

1. Very, but I shouldn’t be. I hate every single thing about my body. There isn’t one aspect of my physical being that gives me confidence.

I also hate how my brain works in many situations. I’m a bit weird haha.

BUT - I’m ok with all of that. I used to let my body and way of life dictate my demeanour but now I accept I am who I am. I could strive to change things but why and who for? I haven’t been unsuccessful on fab or in normal dating, so I’m sticking with me.

I have taken my place on the stage and, while I sometimes miss out on certain things/people, that’s ok.

2. I find shy people hard work but I hate cockiness/arrogance. It’s not an attractive quality to me.

As a couple of posters have said, it’s a fine line.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m a bit confident in different ways

Confidence can be attractive in some ways

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By *lex46TV/TS
over a year ago

Near Wells

Alex is extremely confident in how she feels, her looks and in almost any situation, sometimes she's over confident.

The male side, isn't shy and reasonably confident but still finds some situations awkward or difficult.

I like confident people as it rubs of on me. I don't mind meeting shy people but occasionally it can be hard work.

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By *s2pervsCouple
over a year ago

Truro

So two questions..

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

Answer 1. Comfortable enough for any occasion

Answer 2. Massively but not essential

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By *ustamanMan
over a year ago

weymouth

Always been attracted to confident women although I have found occasionally that confidence is just a veneer hiding an anxious person beneath.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m confident in front of people but in my mind I’m really not. I’m a bit like the proverbial swan. Nice and calm from appearance but underneath I’m paddling away like mad.

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By *urbo TedMan
over a year ago

Stansted

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

1) It varies. In the past I've competed in sports to a good level and this built confidence, but I can also have days where things in life aren't quite right and I question myself massively and will become withdrawn.

2) Depending on the situation it can be an attractive feature, but equally over confidence with a lack of being humble is a huge no no for me

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

So two questions..

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

I'm fairly comfortable with myself, age and experience helps there.

I find confidence very attractive. I think some people have misplaced confidence in their abilities but that soon becomes apparent. I also think that confidence and arrogance are not related in any way. Arrogant people frequently lack confidence I've found.

I'm tired of the trend that means if someone expresses doubt in themselves we build them up and tell them to have confidence but if people express confidence in themselves we use phrases like 'self praise is no recommendation '. I genuinely don't understand the thinking behind that

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So two questions..

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

I'm fairly comfortable with myself, age and experience helps there.

I dont believe in this kind of thinking myself, self praise not on an ego centric manner, but on I've done this well to the best of my abilities should be encouraged and praised, as if we don't allow ourselves to acknowledge the good of us, how do we ever challenge any belief systems based in negative

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/01/23 13:47:45]

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By *entlemanrogueMan
over a year ago

Motherwell

1. Confident enough to just be myself. (Though there is room for improvement)

2. Very attractive, however over confidence/arrogance will turn a 10 to 0 immediately.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

So two questions..

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

I'm fairly comfortable with myself, age and experience helps there.

Yes. We seem to encourage low self esteem which I find sad.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

1. Very

2. Not very. I prefer them to have Daddy issues, be broken and vulnerable!

Sometimes you find yourself on your knees sucking off a cock that should have retired some years ago and think to yourself 'how did I get here?'

And then you remember, daddy issues

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm pretty confident I think it comes with age

And I find confidence is a guy very sexy

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By *agerMorganMan
over a year ago

Canvey Island

I’ve been told I’m “Quietly confident” in that I don’t make a massive song and dance about it.

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

Very confident in personal and professional terms. At times it may give off an air of cockyness or arrogance, though I'm neither.

I find confidence an attractive trait in others and has often been a lure.

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

I’m confident in most situations. Sometimes that may be fake it ‘til you make it, but that works for me.

Self confident? Fairly.. I’m no supermodel, but also not a dog. I know my strengths and play to them.

I lack in self belief quite often. Up until recently I really struggled to take a compliment, but I am getting better at believing/accepting that it is genuine. If it’s not then - shame on them, not me.

I do like quiet confidence, but I do also like some vulnerability. I am, by nature, a leader & a fixer so that appeals to me. I do like to be the strength at times. But that’s a 50:50 thing. But then true strength & confidence is sometimes the ability to admit to vulnerability.

I don’t like cocky or controlling.

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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes

My confidence is knowing I can protect myself and my family and the woman I am with.. provide a comfortable lifestyle .. I don't doubt myself or my abilities in anyway.. when I compete I know I will win.. if I am in an accident I know I will survive.. I believe in myself .. you project your confidence and belief into reality..

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By *ralwizardMan
over a year ago

Thornaby

I find a woman who is confident and self assured highly attractive, and a huge huge turn on!!

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By *entleman of FortuneMan
over a year ago

Hull

So two questions..

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

I've got a lot of confidence within myself and my abilities in anything I decide to do, not arrogant, just personable, willing to listen and not make every conversation just about myself, walk tall, give eye contact and smile, I try and make others around me feel good - to me that's confidence.

Confidence is a very attractive quality - I do find that woman especially have self confidence issues - no matter how beautiful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Confident in my own abilities but also aware that there are many things I lack experience in so wouldn't be confident in certain situations

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

So two questions..

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

Confidence is a very attractive quality - I do find that woman especially have self confidence issues - no matter how beautiful. "

It's interesting that you equate women's confidence with their attractiveness. A guy once assumed I didn't want to have sex with him at a party because I wasn't confident about how I looked in my dress. I still can't fathom that one out.

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By *ames-77Man
over a year ago

milton keynes

So two questions..

1. How comfortable are you within self..

2. How attractive to you find confidence.

Confidence is a very attractive quality - I do find that woman especially have self confidence issues - no matter how beautiful.

Neither can we comment on that personal experience of yours

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