FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Making the first move.

Jump to newest
 

By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38

Ladies, do you proactively search out partners off fab

If so, would you also make the first move in 'civvie street'?

Guys, how often do women make the first move in said street?

Does it feel good when it happens?

Or do you feel embarrassed and would rather make that move yourself?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

Never!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ladies, do you proactively search out partners off fab

If so, would you also make the first move in 'civvie street'?

Guys, how often do women make the first move in said street?

Does it feel good when it happens?

Or do you feel embarrassed and would rather make that move yourself?"

Only once in my life has it happened when a middle aged woman said to me

'Corr you look like a pussyteaser'

I thanked her and walked on with a spring in my step

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"Ladies, do you proactively search out partners off fab

If so, would you also make the first move in 'civvie street'?

Guys, how often do women make the first move in said street?

Does it feel good when it happens?

Or do you feel embarrassed and would rather make that move yourself?

Only once in my life has it happened when a middle aged woman said to me

'Corr you look like a pussyteaser'

I thanked her and walked on with a spring in my step"

That was forward of her!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hopefully they do as I rarely text !!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ladies, do you proactively search out partners off fab

If so, would you also make the first move in 'civvie street'?

Guys, how often do women make the first move in said street?

Does it feel good when it happens?

Or do you feel embarrassed and would rather make that move yourself?

Only once in my life has it happened when a middle aged woman said to me

'Corr you look like a pussyteaser'

I thanked her and walked on with a spring in my step

That was forward of her!"

Yeah she wasn't what I would call the classiest of ladies bless her but you know, it was...sweet?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good evening young lady

Work in Retail been busy over Christmas and new year I wouldn’t ask any of lady's because it’s my work

Have been asked when out and about by lady’s

Only about five in six years so not many

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"Never! "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i never make the first move.

i don't like being rejected.. so if i don't do it, then there's no chance of getting my feelings hurt win win. Px

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

C has never made the first move…I’m trying to encourage her to go outside of her comfort zone and approach guys she likes in clubs and I set her a task of trying to pull someone at a weekend away…I think the guy approached her though

I find it a complete turn on when someone comes over and says you are hot…so it’s good to tell people…

OP I think you are hot

K

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd love someone to be the first to message me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

On here, every conversation in the last 3 years has been started by women making the first move.

Not on here it has never happened.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd love someone to be the first to message me "

You are welcome

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"i never make the first move.

i don't like being rejected.. so if i don't do it, then there's no chance of getting my feelings hurt win win. Px "

You know that's why there is so many men on here complaining about constant rejection though right?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Not often but normally either a hint or end up kissing no Streets night club

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'd love someone to be the first to message me

You are welcome "

Saw this coming

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Never! "

I'm older than you and it's happened once, so keep the faith

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

When I used to meet I was happy to make the first move.

In my younger days I gad no problem approaching guys in a club or pub but only if eye contact had been made.

I wouldn't walk up to someone in the street through

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

No, it never ends well. So now I sit in my feminine energy and let them persue me. I don't chase anyone.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"C has never made the first move…I’m trying to encourage her to go outside of her comfort zone and approach guys she likes in clubs and I set her a task of trying to pull someone at a weekend away…I think the guy approached her though

I find it a complete turn on when someone comes over and says you are hot…so it’s good to tell people…

OP I think you are hot

K"

And it's good to hear too

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They have to shoot their shot because of my age

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ehindHerEyesCouple
over a year ago

SomewhereOnlyWeKnow


"i never make the first move.

i don't like being rejected.. so if i don't do it, then there's no chance of getting my feelings hurt win win. Px "

This for me too!

Tinder x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *inkyInkedBiWoman
over a year ago

.

I used to be nervous reaching out first but thought fuck it, life’s too short

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iromancergirl1Woman
over a year ago

bolton

In person or in a club yes I do but on here no I think I come across better in person.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

[Removed by poster at 09/01/23 20:36:25]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

I quite like reaching out first.

Don't get me wrong, sometimes I have the oh crap, what happens if he/she/they don't like me. Are only politely entertaining my waffle because well... it's polite. But I like being proactive in messaging someone (when I'm feeling up to it). Sometimes I love if people are more proactive with me. I've never really done it erm... away from fab. People tend to express interest and have to be pretty clear with it or I just think they're being friendly.

There have been a few men who have said right Meli, I'm meeting you at place X at this time and I've swooned. Oh I can't quite express how much I've loved this.

Then again, I'm full of contradictions so want to find people where I can message first. They can. It's not important to me who does, as long as it happens.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I used to be nervous reaching out first but thought fuck it, life’s too short "

I agree totally....go for it! x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

Extremely rare but when its happened, very impressive, textbook message,,saved one as a template

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

I'm happy to make the first move whether on here or off its the spice of life. Don't feel embarrassed nor uncomfortable if doesn't go to plan more room for someone else

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Fulwood

I once had a woman tell me she could tell my fortune by feeling my balls - turns out her first prediction that I was shortly going to get my brains fucked out was absolutely on the money!! 100% true!! When I was a musician i did get ladies making the first move more often than i thought - think that’s just ‘a thing!’ 9/10 i made my excuses - ‘ a blowjob behind the sound guys desk! ‘ ffs makes me smile now!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I quite like reaching out first.

Don't get me wrong, sometimes I have the oh crap, what happens if he/she/they don't like me. Are only politely entertaining my waffle because well... it's polite. But I like being proactive in messaging someone (when I'm feeling up to it). Sometimes I love if people are more proactive with me. I've never really done it erm... away from fab. People tend to express interest and have to be pretty clear with it or I just think they're being friendly.

There have been a few men who have said right Meli, I'm meeting you at place X at this time and I've swooned. Oh I can't quite express how much I've loved this.

Then again, I'm full of contradictions so want to find people where I can message first. They can. It's not important to me who does, as long as it happens."

Putting yourself out of your comfort zone and asking can be exciting! You've got to be in it to win it.

And, yes. Someone taking control can be just as exciting!

One day maybe you'll do it away from here

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olly SwallowsTV/TS
over a year ago

Sexville


"I used to be nervous reaching out first but thought fuck it, life’s too short "

This! I lost all my fucks to give and just crack on now!

What’s the worst that can happen he tells me I’m just a slapper with a willy*

* True story

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..

I did make the first move once upon a time and it worked out incredibly well

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I did make the first move once upon a time and it worked out incredibly well, I got my ass fucked "

See guys, it can work x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I used to be nervous reaching out first but thought fuck it, life’s too short

This! I lost all my fucks to give and just crack on now!

What’s the worst that can happen he tells me I’m just a slapper with a willy*

* True story "

That's awful and out of order

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I did make the first move once upon a time and it worked out incredibly well, I got my ass fucked

See guys, it can work x "

Who'd have thought it, eh!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *olly SwallowsTV/TS
over a year ago

Sexville


"I used to be nervous reaching out first but thought fuck it, life’s too short

This! I lost all my fucks to give and just crack on now!

What’s the worst that can happen he tells me I’m just a slapper with a willy*

* True story

That's awful and out of order "

Meh - it’s not far off lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

I have found it much easier to approach men in here than in real life, some of my greatest meets have been brought about by me messaging first

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"I used to be nervous reaching out first but thought fuck it, life’s too short

This! I lost all my fucks to give and just crack on now!

What’s the worst that can happen he tells me I’m just a slapper with a willy*

* True story

That's awful and out of order

Meh - it’s not far off lol "

You can say it but they can't! x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *akeanyoneMan
over a year ago

LH

They do elsewhere online, occasionally on Fab, and never in the streets

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat

On here I rarely hunt tho have been known to message first on rare occasions.

Out in the wild I have only ever once picked up a guy. That was in a lift.

So my username is somewhat misleading - I'm more like a lion waiting for the meat to be delivered to me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nabelle21 OP   Woman
over a year ago

B38


"On here I rarely hunt tho have been known to message first on rare occasions.

Out in the wild I have only ever once picked up a guy. That was in a lift.

So my username is somewhat misleading - I'm more like a lion waiting for the meat to be delivered to me "

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"On here I rarely hunt tho have been known to message first on rare occasions.

Out in the wild I have only ever once picked up a guy. That was in a lift.

So my username is somewhat misleading - I'm more like a lion waiting for the meat to be delivered to me "

Just Eat?!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Fulwood


"On here I rarely hunt tho have been known to message first on rare occasions.

Out in the wild I have only ever once picked up a guy. That was in a lift.

So my username is somewhat misleading - I'm more like a lion waiting for the meat to be delivered to me "

I would love to see deliveroo handle me to your doorstep!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/01/23 21:17:38]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford

In the real world, women never approach me. In sharp contrast, away from here, I am never approached by women.

It's the variety that gives life its richness.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *anae21Woman
over a year ago

Nearer than you think

I've sent the first message a few times, or responded to a forum post. Why not? I know what I'm looking for.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Truthfully, I’ve had a few 1st messages. and it’s lovely and flattering to know somebody looked at you or has thought they wanted to talk.

I’ve even got to meet a couple of people. Isn’t this what fab is supposed to be about? Talking, making friends and then meeting up?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only make the first move when Ii at the club, CJ's because I feel more comfortable there x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 09/01/23 21:24:34]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I only make the first move when Ii at the club, CJ's because I feel more comfortable there x"

I’ve heard good things about CJs

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every now and again a woman will make the first move on us but it’s rare. To be expected though so we normally wink or say hi first.

Mr

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *un-n-frolicsMan
over a year ago

London


"i never make the first move.

i don't like being rejected.. so if i don't do it, then there's no chance of getting my feelings hurt win win. Px "

Or lose - you may have missed out on someone great.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"i never make the first move.

i don't like being rejected.. so if i don't do it, then there's no chance of getting my feelings hurt win win. Px

Or lose - you may have missed out on someone great. "

I just sent her a dick pic. You think she’ll like it?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I only make the first move when Ii at the club, CJ's because I feel more comfortable there x

I’ve heard good things about CJs"

Always have a good night in there. You should get yourself up here sometime x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orphia2003Woman
over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Yeah all the time. Online and at clubs etc.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

No far too shy

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would die of shock if one made the moves on me

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lowercandyWoman
over a year ago

Lancashire

Omg no... No.. definitely more anxiety than I want to deal with

Just the thought makes me nervous

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *weetiepie99Woman
over a year ago

cardiff

Nope. Not on here or off here. But i know i should more

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never met a guy that's mailed me first. I've chatted with them yes but that's it. Mind you it's been forever since I've got meet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Beds (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)

I do on here... saves the Fab admin with filters, and rejection on here is easier to cope with as 99% are really polite.

...and years ago used a few awful one liners in clubs to chat up guys

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I do on here... saves the Fab admin with filters, and rejection on here is easier to cope with as 99% are really polite.

...and years ago used a few awful one liners in clubs to chat up guys "

Yes! Go on!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have done and will continue to

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have done and will continue to "

You really are a cheeky sort aren't you Mel?!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester


"i never make the first move.

i don't like being rejected.. so if i don't do it, then there's no chance of getting my feelings hurt win win. Px "

So by that logic, how many approaches do you get, I mean legitimate face to face ones? Because your pictures and videos tell me that any man is in for a once-in-a-lifetime treat he'll never forget.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have done and will continue to

You really are a cheeky sort aren't you Mel?!"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have done and will continue to

You really are a cheeky sort aren't you Mel?!

"

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ust PeachyWoman
over a year ago

Prestonish

I often make the first move on here. Worst that can happen is that they decline or ignore my message. Hardly a big deal is it?

In the real world I’m usually out with a group of female friends - only really come across chaps when queuing at the bar and they’re either young or I assume they’re in a relationship. I find fab far simpler and more straight forward.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hagTonightMan
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

No, it have never happened.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Covent Garden


"On here, every conversation in the last 3 years has been started by women making the first move."

•

Verbatim for me. Certainly in the last two years or so.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hirleyMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Takes me by surprise if I get hit on. I usually calculate everything so if someone tries to bring their emotion into the mix I have no idea how to react and results vary. Although it used to happen much more when I was younger, don't really get it much now

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

Online yes, I actively search whatever site I'm using for profiles that appeal and then message.

In real life hell no. I can't tell someone is flirting with me even when they make it ridiculously obvious, so there's a very high likelihood I'm just misreading signals from someone who isn't in any way interested.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *b72Man
over a year ago

Nottingham

Not once in my life gas a woman made the first move.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

?

On here, I've only ever met one man who I didn't initiate contact with (but I did have him on my radar, I just hadn't got round to messaging him yet).

Oh goodness, I used to be terrible for chatting random blokes up on nights out when I was (much) younger. It never fazed me if I saw someone that I liked the look of, I'd just walk right up to them in the middle of their bunch of mates and say hello.

I'd likely do the same now if I was single, I love a good flirt

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he_Secret_GardenWoman
over a year ago

Naughty Lane

I can't say im actively looking but I wouldn't have any problem to approach someone I find attractive...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

On Fab I’ve had a handful of messages, mainly from couples but some single women. Sadly none of them were my type or were fakes!

Never in my non-fab life have I been approached first (pouts) apart from the swathes of prozzies in Marbs (always said no, obvs)

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ig FredMan
over a year ago

Nearby

Regularly approached when out in real life but rarely on here.

My profile on here is minimalist for a reason though and I'm very gregarious in the flesh, so I know why

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Life is too short to wait around for it to happen so I happily message people I’m interested in.

What the worst that is going to happen?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *unCycleGymRepeatMan
over a year ago

Greater London

Personally I have no problems making the first move.

However, I seem to get better results by not chasing. I normally put myself in a position whereby I get noticed but then don't act on it, awaiting for the other party.

For instance, in the gym, I normally do the right work at the right time to get noticed but never engage with any of the girls.

On here, I am not really active but more interested in learning about people. I do send first messages, occasionally, with a picture and can expect a no response most of the time.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Beds (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)


"I do on here... saves the Fab admin with filters, and rejection on here is easier to cope with as 99% are really polite.

...and years ago used a few awful one liners in clubs to chat up guys

Yes! Go on!"

Do you know they do curry flavoured condoms?!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

Virtually everyone I met here came about from my taking the initiative in expressing interest to meet. From the outset I've had a "nothing ventured nothing gained" mindset. Rejection was nothing to be feared and all part of the process of courting someone.

As they say, you win some you lose some

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top