FabSwingers.com forum: FWB Dynamics

By *akeanyone OP Man
over a year ago

It seems everyone has their own version in mind or in reality of how a FWB situation should be. What's yours ? What rules / boundaries do you have in place ? Do you hold hands ? Have sleepovers ? Bedroom antics more than outside activitys or vice versa ? Anything unique in your situation?

You get the point, now spill the beans

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh hi

When I find someone I can be friends with, as well as have great sex with, I want it all. All day sex sessions. Film nights with take aways. Sexy dinner and drinks nights. Nights away. Cooking new things for each other. Comedy nights. Live music… I’ll stop now

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By *rtyIanMan
over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons

"Oh hi

You put it so eloquently

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

"Oh hi

"
a relationship basically

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

For me. It is a great friend and we occasionally celebrate our friendship with sexual intimacy

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

I think it would probably vary depending on the other person, but someone I could talk to about anything and everything, spend time with outside of the bedroom, but not be exclusive with.

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By *akeanyone OP Man
over a year ago

"Oh hi

Hey stranger, looking good

I guess that begs the question, what separates a FWB to a relationship for you ? Are you able to go through all the above with someone whilst withholding feelings or do you let nature take its course and let be what will be ?

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Both of us are on the same line on the same page in the same book.

We put greater emphasis on the friendship part and that means no pressure at all when it comes to the benefits part.

We trust each other implicitly, support each other through difficult days and enjoy great sex together.

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By *rincipessaWoman
over a year ago

your wildest dreams,

Of course we all want different but with my fbs, fwbs, I do meals, drinks, visit art galleries and generally hang out when we have time to spend together. Will spend nights, weekends, holidays together. Yes we hold hands. I guess it’s like a relationship in miniature. For that period of time that we are in each other’s company. When we part there are no emotions, no yearnings involved. We crack on with our own thing, until we mutually agree another time could be a week, a month, 6months later

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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago

somerset

fwb is a sexual friend that i can have lots of fun with without any attachment someone who whould also be friends with my hubs ...no dating or meals no film nights just sexy fun / stay overs

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By *rtyIanMan
over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons

"Of course we all want different but with my fbs, fwbs, I do meals, drinks, visit art galleries and generally hang out when we have time to spend together. Will spend nights, weekends, holidays together. Yes we hold hands. I guess it’s like a relationship in miniature. For that period of time that we are in each other’s company. When we part there are no emotions, no yearnings involved. We crack on with our own thing, until we mutually agree another time could be a week, a month, 6months later"

Do you do wet suit removal techniques

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By *rincipessaWoman
over a year ago

your wildest dreams,

Haha we have compared, yes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I guess that begs the question, what separates a FWB to a relationship for you ? Are you able to go through all the above with someone whilst withholding feelings or do you let nature take its course and let be what will be ? "

Not much separation!

But I can be sensible and gently extract myself if I feel I’m getting too into someone.

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By *akeanyone OP Man
over a year ago

"I think it would probably vary depending on the other person, but someone I could talk to about anything and everything, spend time with outside of the bedroom, but not be exclusive with."

Should there be more time spent in or out of the bedroom?

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By *akeanyone OP Man
over a year ago

That's a good way of looking at it

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By *an4funMan
over a year ago

london

"Oh hi

a relationship basically

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I LOVE art galleries!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m not saying anything, just make sure you have Weetabix in the morning.

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By *akeanyone OP Man
over a year ago

Not much separation!

But I can be sensible and gently extract myself if I feel I’m getting too into someone."

Ah we're the opposite, when I feel like I'm getting into someone it's because I gently insert myself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All the fun without the feelings.

Someone who can wet your knickers by making you laugh and horny.

Someone you feel comfortable enough with to rock no make up and just his t shirt.

Someone who doesn't blow up your phone but geniunely cares enough to check in.

Someone who doesn't need directions to the orgasm button.

Overall a good person with a good heart and a great penis

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters

[Removed by poster at 06/01/23 20:04:56]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I would struggle to go from a relationship to just being FWB ,

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By *ack688Man
over a year ago

abruzzo Italy (and UK)

I want my fwb’s firstly to be friends, people I like hanging out with, spending time together, doing all the non sexual things that friends do together but with the added bonus of sex and intimacy and affection being the benefits, so yes, kissing in public, holding hands, lots of cuddles, overnight stats, trips away, all of it, honesty and integrity with each other, and lots of respect, but without commitment to each other in relationship terms. As with regular friendships, I don’t want just one friend, so I don’t want just one fwb, I want all of the above with several people and for them to have the same, and we each meet up when diaries allow but we aren’t each other’s sole priority.

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By *erces LetiferMan
over a year ago

Somewhere off the edge of the map... 'ere there be monsters

Someone who you actually like - not just lust after - as a person, and enjoy being around in normal, non-sexual social situations... as well as enjoying sex with them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bloody hell some of these sound like hard work ! Just find someone who's a good shag and makes the tea in the morning and be happy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Someone who you actually like - not just lust after - as a person, and enjoy being around in normal, non-sexual social situations... as well as enjoying sex with them.

Perfect

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not much separation!

But I can be sensible and gently extract myself if I feel I’m getting too into someone.

Ah we're the opposite, when I feel like I'm getting into someone it's because I gently insert myself

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By *asty tatsyMan
over a year ago

london

"Oh hi

Have you just put your application in

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By *lderflower_AppleWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke

I have a couple of FWB things going on... one very close to a relationship - we go out on dates - days out, nights out, cook for each other, pop round for cuppas, have all night sex sessions, and other nights where we might just cuddle all night. We still have other separate fab encounters and are fully supportive of that for each other, but we keep our vanilla lives separate from.our friendship. My family know about him as a friend but I've never felt the need to introduce him.

I have another friend where we meet for coffee and dinner between our meets - which are always over night in hotels.

In both instances I consider them to be confidantes and talk to them both regularly about almost everything that's going on in my life. Both friendships have very different dynamics and give me emotional and physical nourishment in different ways, and yes I'd miss either one of them if they weren't in my life for whatever reason, but knowing they are friends rather than partners keeps the emotional commitment under control.

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By *asty tatsyMan
over a year ago

london

For me I think the main part is Friends, being able to do everything outside a bedroom but also within it. Being comfortable to with someone for drinks, walks and social events having a laugh along the way

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

"Both of us are on the same line on the same page in the same book.

We put greater emphasis on the friendship part and that means no pressure at all when it comes to the benefits part.

We trust each other implicitly, support each other through difficult days and enjoy great sex together. "

You said it better than I could

now do you faf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have a couple of FWB things going on... one very close to a relationship - we go out on dates - days out, nights out, cook for each other, pop round for cuppas, have all night sex sessions, and other nights where we might just cuddle all night. We still have other separate fab encounters and are fully supportive of that for each other, but we keep our vanilla lives separate from.our friendship. My family know about him as a friend but I've never felt the need to introduce him.

I have another friend where we meet for coffee and dinner between our meets - which are always over night in hotels.

Do you have PlayStation parties

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By *iberius61Man
over a year ago

Pontefract

I never set rules or boundaries, I like the way relationships develop. One of my favourite fwb, we started off from a kink interest, spanking. We discovered that we enjoyed sex together, it didn't really start out that way, we tried it and it worked. Then we kinda found other activities that we enjoyed, the gym, climbing etc. We will soon be doing an ironman together. It's been fun.

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By *lderflower_AppleWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke

"Do you have PlayStation parties "

Not yet... but I've borrowed games and regularly get given hints and tips!

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

"Both of us are on the same line on the same page in the same book.

We put greater emphasis on the friendship part and that means no pressure at all when it comes to the benefits part.

We trust each other implicitly, support each other through difficult days and enjoy great sex together.

You said it better than I could

now do you faf

You're so beneficial at times

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

"Both of us are on the same line on the same page in the same book.

We put greater emphasis on the friendship part and that means no pressure at all when it comes to the benefits part.

We trust each other implicitly, support each other through difficult days and enjoy great sex together.

You said it better than I could

now do you faf

You're so beneficial at times

Why thank you

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

"I think it would probably vary depending on the other person, but someone I could talk to about anything and everything, spend time with outside of the bedroom, but not be exclusive with.

Should there be more time spent in or out of the bedroom? "

Definitely in, the benefits part is very important

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By *old HoopsWoman
over a year ago

Near Chester

I'm fascinated. Love how you're able to have these amazing experiences without pesky feelings getting involved.

I tried, but couldn't do it.

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By *iberius61Man
over a year ago

Pontefract

"I'm fascinated. Love how you're able to have these amazing experiences without pesky feelings getting involved.

I tried, but couldn't do it.

Of course feelings are involved, humans are social species. Why do you think they shouldn't be?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A friend - we get on, do social activities, kinky flirts, some level of care, trust & a heap of banter. With a kinky twist/ lots of sex.

No relationship intimacy like hand holding, intimate & emotional kissing & cuddlingflirting, instead, of playful kissing/ cuddles/ teases.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm fascinated. Love how you're able to have these amazing experiences without pesky feelings getting involved.

I tried, but couldn't do it.

Of course feelings are involved, humans are social species. Why do you think they shouldn't be?"

The gloaty ‘sounds like a relationship’ comments at the start of the thread

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

"I'm fascinated. Love how you're able to have these amazing experiences without pesky feelings getting involved.

I tried, but couldn't do it.

Of course feelings are involved, humans are social species. Why do you think they shouldn't be?

The gloaty ‘sounds like a relationship’ comments at the start of the thread

It’s quite nice to ignore other comments and be confident you can enjoy a relationship on your terms, whether it’s a conventional relationship, something very different or somewhere in the middle.

TL;DR: fuck what anyone else thinks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It’s quite nice to ignore other comments and be confident you can enjoy a relationship on your terms, whether it’s a conventional relationship, something very different or somewhere in the middle.

TL;DR: fuck what anyone else thinks

you’re right

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By *iberius61Man
over a year ago

Pontefract

"...fuck what anyone else thinks

I'm autistic, most of the time I don't recognise that anyone else thinks anything

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By *iberius61Man
over a year ago

Pontefract

"The gloaty ‘sounds like a relationship’ comments at the start of the thread

I guess to me, it is a relationship. Just not one where I want to move in with someone and get married. There are a small number of ladies/couples who I enjoy their company...for a limited time. Call it a relationship if you want, why not?

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By *adyBugsWoman
over a year ago

cognito

"All the fun without the feelings.

Someone who can wet your knickers by making you laugh and horny.

Someone you feel comfortable enough with to rock no make up and just his t shirt.

Someone who doesn't blow up your phone but geniunely cares enough to check in.

Someone who doesn't need directions to the orgasm button.

Overall a good person with a good heart and a great penis

1,000,000% this

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By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

...

Of course feelings are involved, humans are social species. Why do you think they shouldn't be?"

Neatly countered by the post further down

"I'm autistic, most of the time I don't recognise that anyone else thinks anything "

Not all humans are the same!

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By *orphia2003Woman
over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Friend who I can talk to on the phone / videocall, wants to come out to dinner, drinks, gig etc. Enjoys cooking / likes being cooked for.

Sometimes just fancies heading off somewhere to do something that will be decided on the way.

Sit in car, drinking coffee, watching the waves.

Wanders in with beer and pizza for a film night and a cwtch.

And who I sometimes like fucking.

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By *mwirralMan
over a year ago

wirral

I had a fwb who was a niece of a friend of mine, we had a laugh and sex, we slipped into a relationship without knowing it, she shagged someone else, we both regretted it so decided we had moved from fwb to relationship.

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By *ittleRed18Woman
over a year ago

Aberdeen

"All the fun without the feelings.

Someone who can wet your knickers by making you laugh and horny.

Someone you feel comfortable enough with to rock no make up and just his t shirt.

Someone who doesn't blow up your phone but geniunely cares enough to check in.

Someone who doesn't need directions to the orgasm button.

Overall a good person with a good heart and a great penis

Couldn't have put it better myself!

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By *ittleRed18Woman
over a year ago

Aberdeen

"I want my fwb’s firstly to be friends, people I like hanging out with, spending time together... ... As with regular friendships, I don’t want just one friend, so I don’t want just one fwb, I want all of the above with several people and for them to have the same, and we each meet up when diaries allow but we aren’t each other’s sole priority. "

Yes! And just as with friendships just because you have more friends doesn't mean you care less about any of them

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

It surprises me when some people speak as if there is a "correct" way to have a FWB relationship. That makes no sense, considering that there is no correct one-size-fits-all template for friendship, romantic relationships or even marriage.

Saying that, I (Jack) do make a distinction between FWB and FB.

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By *old HoopsWoman
over a year ago

Near Chester

"I'm fascinated. Love how you're able to have these amazing experiences without pesky feelings getting involved.

I tried, but couldn't do it.

Of course feelings are involved, humans are social species. Why do you think they shouldn't be?"

It's not that I think they shouldn't be no feelings at all.

I mean the feeling of wanting more with that person when it isn't supposed to be more than FWB and the feeling isn't mutual. It's why I used pesky. I could have worded it better.

What I'm reading here sounds great. It makes me see what other people get from fwb as I honestly didn't get it because of my experiences. I'm low-key annoyed with myself for missing out, while happy that others are having a good time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh hi

That’s a girlfriend/boyfriend deal surely.

Op. Something similar like this….

but it’s more about communication, friends are real with each other and talk. It’s not just about the sex you might share.

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By *histle do nicelyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow South

"Oh hi

"
. Same for me

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