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I really can't keep up

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Last night, I indulged in a little forum interaction on a thread, which luckily for me led to several messages.

BUT, within a few minutes I found myself really struggling to have a meaningful conversation and not appear aloof/uninterested with a few people all at once! Add to that, work preparation for the following day, and I'm sure I crashed and burned and possibly appeared rather rude.

How do you manage multiple conversations on here? Politely tell them you're busy? Spend hours of your life typing or spin plates madly to keep options open

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I don't

It's all meaningless frippery

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


" Last night, I indulged in a little forum interaction on a thread, which luckily for me led to several messages.

BUT, within a few minutes I found myself really struggling to have a meaningful conversation and not appear aloof/uninterested with a few people all at once! Add to that, work preparation for the following day, and I'm sure I crashed and burned and possibly appeared rather rude.

How do you manage multiple conversations on here? Politely tell them you're busy? Spend hours of your life typing or spin plates madly to keep options open "
i always see everything with humour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People reply when they can, we all have lives. Just talk when you want to talk, anyone who can't handle that is nothing short of needy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t overthink it, dip in and out of conversations. Nobody’s gonna pick you apart for having real world stuff to do as well as chatting here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just don’t reply until I have enough time to. I understand people have a life outside of fab and don’t expect a reply straight away , I’d hope anyone I was speaking to would understand that as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

as others are saying, just chat when you can / want to. that's the beauty of this place.. everyone has lives to live, so dipping in and out is inevitable. Px

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

Four women all said the same thing lol so you'd better believe they're right

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By *iberius61Man
over a year ago

Pontefract

Same as others have said, I reply when I have time. Might be seconds, but also might be days...especially if I'm out in the Maldives diving with sharks

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Same as others have said, I reply when I have time. Might be seconds, but also might be days...especially if I'm out in the Maldives diving with sharks "
omg such an exciting life

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By *uliette500Woman
over a year ago

Hull

I reply when I can.

If anyone moans about the time taken to reply I end the conversation.

We all have lives off the site and if people can't accept that then that's their problem.

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest


" Last night, I indulged in a little forum interaction on a thread, which luckily for me led to several messages.

BUT, within a few minutes I found myself really struggling to have a meaningful conversation and not appear aloof/uninterested with a few people all at once! Add to that, work preparation for the following day, and I'm sure I crashed and burned and possibly appeared rather rude.

How do you manage multiple conversations on here? Politely tell them you're busy? Spend hours of your life typing or spin plates madly to keep options open "

The spinning plates analogy is an accurate one. Like all things, it becomes easier with practice. People who have common sense wouldn't expect an immediate reply to every message. As mentioned, people have lives with other matters requiring their attention.

Sheer volume of messages is also a poor indicator of interest/ lack of. What matters is the content and how you frame them.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

Keep your options open. Oh people of Fab! Yeah, don't feel guilt.

Reply when you want, how you want, to who you want to. Prioritise yourself and then others based on their importance - you don't owe folk on here constant or immediate interactions. And lacklustre replies are truly awful and dull. Don't give those.

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

OP. I’m quite sure you didn’t appear rude at all. You reply when you can, and if you want to. No one could ask for more and if they do, they’re probably not worth continuing a conversation with anyway.

Hope you got some relax time as you sound like you need some

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


" Last night, I indulged in a little forum interaction on a thread, which luckily for me led to several messages.

BUT, within a few minutes I found myself really struggling to have a meaningful conversation and not appear aloof/uninterested with a few people all at once! Add to that, work preparation for the following day, and I'm sure I crashed and burned and possibly appeared rather rude.

How do you manage multiple conversations on here? Politely tell them you're busy? Spend hours of your life typing or spin plates madly to keep options open "

You only speak to one person at a time you whore!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Keep your options open. Oh people of Fab! Yeah, don't feel guilt.

Reply when you want, how you want, to who you want to. Prioritise yourself and then others based on their importance - you don't owe folk on here constant or immediate interactions. And lacklustre replies are truly awful and dull. Don't give those.

"

Love this. I felt guilty last night after I told someone I wasn’t interested because they’d message message messaged to poke me into responding to them. If patient people are attractive to me, and they are, I will continue to stand firm and find those people.

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

I rarely ever have the opportunity of chatting to multiple people at once. However when it happens I find it is how engaging the other person/people are. If they are showing as much interest as me then it's sort of effortless. If they appear to be replying with little interest then my own falls too.as others have said it, nobody is owed your attention or interest if you don't want or feel like giving it. And nobody should make you feel bad for it, not even yourself.

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By *hil most chillMan
over a year ago

South East & Europe


"People reply when they can, we all have lives. Just talk when you want to talk, anyone who can't handle that is nothing short of needy."

This is it, you shouldn't feel bad for having a life outside of this place

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I don't tbh

I really only speak to people I know quite well regularly.

It's sometimes really hard work to keep some conversations going , especially when you're getting a couple of word replies .I don't have the energy for that nowadays .

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I don’t over think it , if you really click with someone it’s usually effortless and you prioritise them, otherwise just let it fizzle.

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By *iberius61Man
over a year ago

Pontefract


"Same as others have said, I reply when I have time. Might be seconds, but also might be days...especially if I'm out in the Maldives diving with sharks omg such an exciting life "

It's the only one you got, don't waste it

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Same as others have said, I reply when I have time. Might be seconds, but also might be days...especially if I'm out in the Maldives diving with sharks omg such an exciting life

It's the only one you got, don't waste it "
i wont remember sharks eat meat

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By *adMerWoman
over a year ago

Sandwich


"I don’t over think it , if you really click with someone it’s usually effortless and you prioritise them, otherwise just let it fizzle.

"

This!

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By *humper.Man
over a year ago

northumberland/scotland

When I first joined I used to get anxious over replying or, not getting replies. You soon realise that everyone is in the same boat, reply when you can/in the mood. Most of the times I come online I don't even check my messages, just dick about on the forums and away again

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I don't chat. Simple as. If I want to chat I call someone or have them call me.

The message system to me was only ever for brief comments or the start to arranging a meet. The only chat platform more disjointed than this is the forum and the chat rooms....

Messages fine. Chat .... noooooooo

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