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Women that are to worried to ask for advice…

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I get it. You worry if your profile is attracting the type of people you want to meet.

So this is a safe place for you to ask for advice, and all the MEN who are now qualified after years of education in fab on what makes a good profile can help you out.

So post you are in for you annual profile MOT.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in!

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

Oooo! I'm in, love a bit of early morning masochism while waiting for a call.

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By *enrietteandSamCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire


"I'm in! "

Your pictures need some attention.

I suggest getting some root vegetables involved.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm in!

Your pictures need some attention.

I suggest getting some root vegetables involved."

I'm afraid this will butter no parsnips.

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

I certainly don't want to attract the wrong men but they seem to always be in my inbox regardless of what I do to my profile as let's face it, most people don't read profiles

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat

Oooh I'm in. Do your worst!

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By *hil most chillMan
over a year ago

South East & Europe

Happy to mansplain anything to all the damsels in distress. If I was there in person I'd open jars for you too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everyone to upload feet and camel toe pictures

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat


"Happy to mansplain anything to all the damsels in distress. If I was there in person I'd open jars for you too"

I have a little silicone disk that makes opening jars a doddle. Best £1 I ever spent as I never need a man again!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm in!

Your pictures need some attention.

I suggest getting some root vegetables involved."

Like a potato?

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds


"I'm in!

Your pictures need some attention.

I suggest getting some root vegetables involved."

For the love of god. Please please please. No more veg.

The mr

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I certainly don't want to attract the wrong men but they seem to always be in my inbox regardless of what I do to my profile as let's face it, most people don't read profiles"

I think all females and couples attract the ones we don't want and we probably get the same ones as you seems we are close together.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In

I got some pretty aggressive feedback last time

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By *orphia2003Woman
over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Go on then. I'm in.

This will be carnage.

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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Beds (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)


"Everyone to upload feet and camel toe pictures "

... but it's such an effort to get to a zoo to photo a camel

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Oooh I'm in. Do your worst! "
wow do you have the longest profile write up ever..... Maybe you lost me at smorgasbord and you wonder why men dont read it lol happy new year

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By *hil most chillMan
over a year ago

South East & Europe


"Happy to mansplain anything to all the damsels in distress. If I was there in person I'd open jars for you too

I have a little silicone disk that makes opening jars a doddle. Best £1 I ever spent as I never need a man again! "

Lol well now I know my true value (£1)

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"Go on then. I'm in.

This will be carnage. "

You’ve got an accidental line break between ‘if you live miles away,’ and ‘chances are we aren't going to be meeting.’

Fix that and you’re grand.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haha interesting thread. Do your worst.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

Hit me.

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By *oudoirGoddessWoman
over a year ago

Fantasy Island

Hahaha I’m in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

After returning from my annual hiatus, i guess i could use some pointers... go for it Px

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm in!

Your pictures need some attention.

I suggest getting some root vegetables involved.

For the love of god. Please please please. No more veg.

The mr "

*puts the potato away*

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By *liceinwanderlust101Woman
over a year ago

Cambridge/London

Corrr come on then, Fabbers never seem to be short of opinions!

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat


"Happy to mansplain anything to all the damsels in distress. If I was there in person I'd open jars for you too

I have a little silicone disk that makes opening jars a doddle. Best £1 I ever spent as I never need a man again!

Lol well now I know my true value (£1) "

Some are useful for other reasons tho

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.


"Hahaha I’m in"

Not profile advice. Not a man (clearly). You have such a beautiful figure! The latest photo is

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"After returning from my annual hiatus, i guess i could use some pointers... go for it Px "
youre not mary poppins are you because your profile is perfect in every way

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By *oudoirGoddessWoman
over a year ago

Fantasy Island


"Hahaha I’m in

Not profile advice. Not a man (clearly). You have such a beautiful figure! The latest photo is "

Thank you very much

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat


"Hahaha I’m in

Not profile advice. Not a man (clearly). You have such a beautiful figure! The latest photo is "

Credit where credit's due - I've got to agree with Meli. No need to reply... Just sayin!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hit me."

You must be the aunt that the kids are always scared of.

Love it!

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By *otBrunetteHimCouple
over a year ago

birmingham

Okay we’re in and listening

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By *rettyflamingoWoman
over a year ago

Where the flamboyance of flamingos live

I am in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would help but I already rate nudes for women and as much as I like to say I'm a giver ...

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Would it really make any difference to the quality of men?

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Would it really make any difference to the quality of men?"
It might do but i suggest your mind is made already

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By *essicagraceWoman
over a year ago

birmingham

Please give me Intel. I need a refresh!!

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"Not profile advice. Not a man (clearly). You have such a beautiful figure! The latest photo is "


"Credit where credit's due - I've got to agree with Meli. No need to reply... Just sayin! "

I *am* a man and I just want to say these two ladies are both right.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not profile advice. Not a man (clearly). You have such a beautiful figure! The latest photo is

Credit where credit's due - I've got to agree with Meli. No need to reply... Just sayin!

I *am* a man and I just want to say these two ladies are both right. "

I’m speaking on behalf of the under30s men and I agree with the above

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat


"Oooh I'm in. Do your worst! wow do you have the longest profile write up ever..... Maybe you lost me at smorgasbord and you wonder why men dont read it lol happy new year "

Thanks my lovely and a Happy New year to you too. I don't wonder at all but it is a basic requirement that someone is 1. prepared to invest 2 mins of their time in me and 2. can detect sarcasm (it's amazing how many can't!). It's a deliberate endurance test and a useful additional filter!

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Oooh I'm in. Do your worst! wow do you have the longest profile write up ever..... Maybe you lost me at smorgasbord and you wonder why men dont read it lol happy new year

Thanks my lovely and a Happy New year to you too. I don't wonder at all but it is a basic requirement that someone is 1. prepared to invest 2 mins of their time in me and 2. can detect sarcasm (it's amazing how many can't!). It's a deliberate endurance test and a useful additional filter! "

agreed and the latter point especially

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

I know you’ve already gave my profile an MOT on the other thread Woody, but happy to take opinions from others, as long as it’s constructive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m in, be interesting to know

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"I know you’ve already gave my profile an MOT on the other thread Woody, but happy to take opinions from others, as long as it’s constructive "
your profile is quite delicious sorry your pics are I'll go read the rest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I know you’ve already gave my profile an MOT on the other thread Woody, but happy to take opinions from others, as long as it’s constructive "

Not too many cushions or too little cushions. Do you want someone to meet in clubs or do you want a lift from a to b? Not asking for myself

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By *tsalwaysthequietonesCouple
over a year ago

Lancs

Oooohhhh I like this, always onboard for some constructive criticism

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By *enrietteandSamCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire


"I'm in!

Your pictures need some attention.

I suggest getting some root vegetables involved.

Like a potato? "

I was thinking more along the carrot lines

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"Please give me Intel. I need a refresh!!"

Your profile’s ace. Perfect blend of descriptive and witty. And your profile pic is one of the best on the site - so many of us are far too serious and your picture displays sheer joy. It’s glorious.

But nearly a hundred verifications! With the best will in the world I’m never going to read all of those. If it were me, I’d be cutting down to the more recent ones. (But hey - you do you.)

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle


"I know you’ve already gave my profile an MOT on the other thread Woody, but happy to take opinions from others, as long as it’s constructive

Not too many cushions or too little cushions. Do you want someone to meet in clubs or do you want a lift from a to b? Not asking for myself "

Definitely don’t want a lift and wouldn’t necessarily want to meet them at the club, but perhaps just someone to give some pointers for further down the line and then potentially have a club buddy for the future?

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By *rettyflamingoWoman
over a year ago

Where the flamboyance of flamingos live

Still waiting to be appraised !

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Still waiting to be appraised ! "
omg what can i say its to the point, direct, forthright, honest, single men welcome and youre attractive

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By *rettyflamingoWoman
over a year ago

Where the flamboyance of flamingos live


"Still waiting to be appraised ! omg what can i say its to the point, direct, forthright, honest, single men welcome and youre attractive "

Thank you kindly, what you see is what get I can’t stand BS x

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Still waiting to be appraised ! omg what can i say its to the point, direct, forthright, honest, single men welcome and youre attractive

Thank you kindly, what you see is what get I can’t stand BS x"

lol hey no BS here

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By *rettyflamingoWoman
over a year ago

Where the flamboyance of flamingos live


"Still waiting to be appraised ! omg what can i say its to the point, direct, forthright, honest, single men welcome and youre attractive

Thank you kindly, what you see is what get I can’t stand BS xlol hey no BS here "

Shane so far away x

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Still waiting to be appraised ! omg what can i say its to the point, direct, forthright, honest, single men welcome and youre attractive

Thank you kindly, what you see is what get I can’t stand BS xlol hey no BS here

Shane so far away x"

great film..... Alan ladd

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By *ristinapinkWoman
over a year ago

Staines-upon-Thames

I’m in

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By *rettyflamingoWoman
over a year ago

Where the flamboyance of flamingos live


"Still waiting to be appraised ! omg what can i say its to the point, direct, forthright, honest, single men welcome and youre attractive

Thank you kindly, what you see is what get I can’t stand BS xlol hey no BS here

Shane so far away xgreat film..... Alan ladd "

Lol my bloody typos

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Still waiting to be appraised ! omg what can i say its to the point, direct, forthright, honest, single men welcome and youre attractive

Thank you kindly, what you see is what get I can’t stand BS xlol hey no BS here

Shane so far away xgreat film..... Alan ladd

Lol my bloody typos "

i love your typos

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves?

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves? "
well yours is quite to the point too 6' rugged, beard, tatts and 2 hands rough hands and can hold a conversation lol i guess with a figure like yours you can ask for what you like

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By *liceinwanderlust101Woman
over a year ago

Cambridge/London


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves? "

Yeah I thought they would be immediately on the case but maybe stunned into silence?!

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves? well yours is quite to the point too 6' rugged, beard, tatts and 2 hands rough hands and can hold a conversation lol i guess with a figure like yours you can ask for what you like "

Thank you, I know I am quite particular

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By *ristinapinkWoman
over a year ago

Staines-upon-Thames

Yeah still waiting too lol

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves? "

Okay Sam, I’ll bite. Your profile’s tough to criticise though - it’s a near-textbook example, with some gorgeous photos. You might want to rethink the intro where you talk about being new to all this - we can all see that you’ve been here a year now. And it’d be nice to see two or three verifications. Is there a reason you’re not showing any (I mean … if you haven’t met anyone yet than fair enough!)

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves?

Yeah I thought they would be immediately on the case but maybe stunned into silence?! "

I know… thought they would jump at the chance after all the feedback we give

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By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago

Bognor Regis

I think I've frozen out all but those with the thickest skins with my profile- I don't need advice but would be interested to hear opinions

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves?

Yeah I thought they would be immediately on the case but maybe stunned into silence?! "

I think they scared! All talk and no trousers

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"I think I've frozen out all but those with the thickest skins with my profile- I don't need advice but would be interested to hear opinions "
your write up great for the tourist board or trip advisor, she likes local

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves?

Okay Sam, I’ll bite. Your profile’s tough to criticise though - it’s a near-textbook example, with some gorgeous photos. You might want to rethink the intro where you talk about being new to all this - we can all see that you’ve been here a year now. And it’d be nice to see two or three verifications. Is there a reason you’re not showing any (I mean … if you haven’t met anyone yet than fair enough!)"

Thank you! So, to explain… the reason I consider myself ‘new to all this’ is because although I’m not new to Fab, I’ve never met anyone from the site, never been to a club, never had threesomes foursomes or moresomes, (yet, I should add) so in that respect, in my opinion, I am still very new to it? That hopefully explains my no verifications also

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves? well yours is quite to the point too 6' rugged, beard, tatts and 2 hands rough hands and can hold a conversation lol i guess with a figure like yours you can ask for what you like

Thank you, I know I am quite particular "

most guys have beards and tatts and rough hands on here lol 6' maybe stretching it a little

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By *liceinwanderlust101Woman
over a year ago

Cambridge/London


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves?

Yeah I thought they would be immediately on the case but maybe stunned into silence?!

I think they scared! All talk and no trousers "

I don’t need them to wear trousers

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By *ed LipstickWoman
over a year ago

Fucksville

Ooooo I'd love some advice on my profile

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

Im in - happy for someone to tell me where I can help Lose my fab virginity!!

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves? well yours is quite to the point too 6' rugged, beard, tatts and 2 hands rough hands and can hold a conversation lol i guess with a figure like yours you can ask for what you like

Thank you, I know I am quite particular most guys have beards and tatts and rough hands on here lol 6' maybe stretching it a little "

Fuck it, I give up. Short, no beard, no tatts and hands as smooth as velvet.

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"… the reason I consider myself ‘new to all this’ is because although I’m not new to Fab, I’ve never met anyone from the site …"

That all makes perfect sense, so I guess my only suggestion is that you could choose to say something about that on your profile - and head off anyone asking about it before they do.

But as with anything to do with your profile, that’s entirely up to you. Keep some things a mystery if you want to!

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"Ooooo I'd love some advice on my profile "
omg you'd leave _ed lipstick over everything

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"I think they scared! All talk and no trousers "


"I don’t need them to wear trousers "

.

I’m at work today though. Like, actually in the studio. With colleagues. So my trousers are staying on.

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle


"Ooooo I'd love some advice on my profile "

You need to raise the age limit and restrict it to screen names the same or very similar to Todgermoore in my opinion!! Oh and smudge that lipstick in varied and creative ways using only parts of my body!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves?

Yeah I thought they would be immediately on the case but maybe stunned into silence?!

I think they scared! All talk and no trousers "

Jokes on you, as I have grey sweats on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll give you all damn advice then!

Don't show ANYTHING - no boobs (looking at you Alice!) no sexy legs (Samantha!) and change your gender to man and you'll be rid of horrible male messages.

I should really start charging for this...

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat


"Come on guys… we’re asking for opinions but most of you are staying quiet. Are you all back to work or are you too nervous to speak up in case you cock block yourselves?

Yeah I thought they would be immediately on the case but maybe stunned into silence?!

I think they scared! All talk and no trousers

Jokes on you, as I have grey sweats on"

I think you will find that as a sartorial choice grey sweats are still an item that you wear to cover your legs, crotch and ass*

* unless either taking a 'come hither' Fab pic or are a yoof that still insists on wearing them low and hanging down like a filled n*ppy

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"Yeah I thought they would be immediately on the case but maybe stunned into silence?! "

Alice, the reason you’re on my hotlist is because I already think you’re awesome. I don’t see any room for improvement.

I dunno … I like the way you write. Maybe you could write a little more? That perfect profile’s kinda brief as it stands. (That’s me really reaching to find a criticism though.)

Oh! I know. ‘Sapiosexual’. I’ve always hated that word. I get it, I really do, but it smacks of pretension. I’d always rather see a few simple words than one fancy one. (But that’s the strict editor in me talking.)

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"I think they scared! All talk and no trousers "

I’m not criticising your profile, Couga. I fucking love it just the way it is.

(Maybe update your meal deal price reference. There’s a cost of living crisis y’know. Price rises everywhere. It’s making you look out of touch with real life on the streets.)

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By *almprintsWoman
over a year ago

deepest, darkest West

Sure thing, please advise away!

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I know this is a tongue in cheek thread but rather than single out a particular profile I'll offer generic advice.

Make an effort with your profile even if you think women don't have to because lazy profiles attract lazy profiles.

Contrary to popular opinion, men do have options on here and whining negative profiles are just as off-putting to us as they are to women.

Use as many of the available filters unless you are allergic to them.

Talk to the person not the cock and you might receive a similar level of respect in return.

It's not foolproof but what have you got to lose.... Apart from your knickers?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I know this is a tongue in cheek thread but rather than single out a particular profile I'll offer generic advice.

Make an effort with your profile even if you think women don't have to because lazy profiles attract lazy profiles.

Contrary to popular opinion, men do have options on here and whining negative profiles are just as off-putting to us as they are to women.

Use as many of the available filters unless you are allergic to them.

Talk to the person not the cock and you might receive a similar level of respect in return.

It's not foolproof but what have you got to lose.... Apart from your knickers? "

You don't like them talking to your cock?

Ladies please remember this is just HIS opinion

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By *liceinwanderlust101Woman
over a year ago

Cambridge/London


"Yeah I thought they would be immediately on the case but maybe stunned into silence?!

Alice, the reason you’re on my hotlist is because I already think you’re awesome. I don’t see any room for improvement.

I dunno … I like the way you write. Maybe you could write a little more? That perfect profile’s kinda brief as it stands. (That’s me really reaching to find a criticism though.)

Oh! I know. ‘Sapiosexual’. I’ve always hated that word. I get it, I really do, but it smacks of pretension. I’d always rather see a few simple words than one fancy one. (But that’s the strict editor in me talking.)"

Good feedback there

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By *ristinapinkWoman
over a year ago

Staines-upon-Thames

“You don't like them talking to your cock?

Ladies please remember this is just HIS opinion”

Hahaha so good!!

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"Good feedback there "

It was a fucking struggle to find anything to suggest, I’m telling you …

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To those with clubs on their profile are you limited to local clubs, all UK or rest of the world?

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat


"I think they scared! All talk and no trousers

I’m not criticising your profile, Couga. I fucking love it just the way it is.

(Maybe update your meal deal price reference. There’s a cost of living crisis y’know. Price rises everywhere. It’s making you look out of touch with real life on the streets.)"

Aw thanks so much. Not sure about North of the Border but I am quoting the correct non Clubcard price from Tescos in da sarf London ghetto where I hail from!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also personally I would like to see more videos of women sucking their fingers seductively on their profile...it really does stuff for me personally you know?

Not sure it helps you lot in any shape or form but you know. It would be great

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think they scared! All talk and no trousers

I’m not criticising your profile, Couga. I fucking love it just the way it is.

(Maybe update your meal deal price reference. There’s a cost of living crisis y’know. Price rises everywhere. It’s making you look out of touch with real life on the streets.)

Aw thanks so much. Not sure about North of the Border but I am quoting the correct non Clubcard price from Tescos in da sarf London ghetto where I hail from! "

Oh get a clubcard! It's life changing!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Also personally I would like to see more videos of women sucking their fingers seductively on their profile...it really does stuff for me personally you know?

Not sure it helps you lot in any shape or form but you know. It would be great "

What like Cheetos dust?

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"Not sure about North of the Border but I am quoting the correct non Clubcard price from Tescos in da sarf London ghetto where I hail from! "

You’ve caught me out there. I have no idea what a meal deal costs. I’m all about the high-end takeaway or the home-made packed lunch. Nothing inbetween.

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"What like Cheetos dust?"

I suspect he’s thinking more Hula-Hoops.

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By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

NORWAY Wherever I lay my hat


"Not sure about North of the Border but I am quoting the correct non Clubcard price from Tescos in da sarf London ghetto where I hail from!

You’ve caught me out there. I have no idea what a meal deal costs. I’m all about the high-end takeaway or the home-made packed lunch. Nothing inbetween. "

I'm a firm believer that variety is the spice of life

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well, since you’re asking for it

You’re straight right and looking for ideal threesome ?can you specify what exactly you’re looking for is it a single male or couple in your bio. Your pictures are cute and can see your ass from all angles,but I wanna see your vagina so I know where I need to dip my tongue in. Alice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well, since you’re asking for it

You’re straight right and looking for ideal threesome ?can you specify what exactly you’re looking for is it a single male or couple in your bio. Your pictures are cute and can see your ass from all angles,but I wanna see your vagina so I know where I need to dip my tongue in. Alice

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By *hil most chillMan
over a year ago

South East & Europe

The problem is most of the ladies in this thread have great profiles, and most of the boys don't want to ruin their chances of hitting it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in,as I'm always up for any advice you forum chaps can give me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well, since you’re asking for it

You’re straight right and looking for ideal threesome ?can you specify what exactly you’re looking for is it a single male or couple in your bio. Your pictures are cute and can see your ass from all angles,but I wanna see your vagina so I know where I need to dip my tongue in. Alice "

Care to elaborate on “- No single males, we'll find you” as if it were a club scenario?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well, since you’re asking for it

You’re straight right and looking for ideal threesome ?can you specify what exactly you’re looking for is it a single male or couple in your bio. Your pictures are cute and can see your ass from all angles,but I wanna see your vagina so I know where I need to dip my tongue in. Alice

Care to elaborate on “- No single males, we'll find you” as if it were a club scenario? "

Usually the man from the couple is let loose or so they say and start messaging for a quick fuck. A lot pretend to be a couple, yet are just fwb's and the guy controls the profile so goes around sending messages as a single male.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well, since you’re asking for it

You’re straight right and looking for ideal threesome ?can you specify what exactly you’re looking for is it a single male or couple in your bio. Your pictures are cute and can see your ass from all angles,but I wanna see your vagina so I know where I need to dip my tongue in. Alice

Care to elaborate on “- No single males, we'll find you” as if it were a club scenario?

Usually the man from the couple is let loose or so they say and start messaging for a quick fuck. A lot pretend to be a couple, yet are just fwb's and the guy controls the profile so goes around sending messages as a single male. "

I meant in person on clubs nights

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well, since you’re asking for it

You’re straight right and looking for ideal threesome ?can you specify what exactly you’re looking for is it a single male or couple in your bio. Your pictures are cute and can see your ass from all angles,but I wanna see your vagina so I know where I need to dip my tongue in. Alice

Care to elaborate on “- No single males, we'll find you” as if it were a club scenario?

Usually the man from the couple is let loose or so they say and start messaging for a quick fuck. A lot pretend to be a couple, yet are just fwb's and the guy controls the profile so goes around sending messages as a single male.

I meant in person on clubs nights "

Ahh ok. Unless we find the guy attractive and have a good vibe then it is a no. If we do, we'll approach them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well, since you’re asking for it

You’re straight right and looking for ideal threesome ?can you specify what exactly you’re looking for is it a single male or couple in your bio. Your pictures are cute and can see your ass from all angles,but I wanna see your vagina so I know where I need to dip my tongue in. Alice "

Do people dip their tongues in?!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ooh my profile must be perfect

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ooh my profile must be perfect "

Not read it yet because it’s longer than the others

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ooh my profile must be perfect

Not read it yet because it’s longer than the others "

That's because I wanted to be precise

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

[Removed by poster at 04/01/23 17:48:27]

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"Ooooo I'd love some advice on my profile"

Okay Red. I know it’s taken me four hours (!) to get around to this but I’m squeezing these crits in between the day job and I’ve had a lot of meetings on today.

I like that you write with personality. I get a feel for how you talk from the way you’ve phrased things, and that overrides any issues with strict grammar or sentence structure. I approve (I’m sure you’re SO glad to hear that from some random Internet bloke).

So don’t go changing.

But maaaaybe … maybe you could switch things up a bit. You write well about (and have fun explaining) what you don’t want from guys. But maybe you could try rephrasing half those things to describe what you DO want instead. Then you’d have a balance of ‘I want X’ and ‘I don’t want Y’ instead of a long list of not wanting X, Y and Z.

Just maybe. But fuck it, because quite frankly I think you write with enough humour to get away with all the negativity. I’d definitely still message you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I certainly don't want to attract the wrong men but they seem to always be in my inbox regardless of what I do to my profile as let's face it, most people don't read profiles"

But this is exactly the place for you then. We will literally read them in request.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dear men of fab,

How do I stop my minge from creamin and smelling like shreks swamp?

Yours sincerely,

Itchy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ooh my profile must be perfect

Not read it yet because it’s longer than the others

That's because I wanted to be precise "

True. I read it well Siri did

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ooh, do me! I just do not get what the problem is!

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli


"Dear men of fab,

How do I stop my minge from creamin and smelling like shreks swamp?

Yours sincerely,

Itchy."

Stay away from Woody and Brucey

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ooh, do me! I just do not get what the problem is!"

Profile lacks boobs and vag

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"Ooh, do me!"

Cheeky. I told you, drinks first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/01/23 18:59:03]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ooh, do me! I just do not get what the problem is!

Profile lacks boobs and vag "

Noted!

I might just ask this every couple of months but never do anything about it. For the authentic profile advice thread experience

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By *ixedDevilMan
over a year ago

Bootyville


"Dear men of fab,

How do I stop my minge from creamin and smelling like shreks swamp?

Yours sincerely,

Itchy."

185g unsalted butter

185g dark chocolate

85g plain flour

40g cocoa powder

50g white chocolate

50g milk chocolate

3 large eggs

275g golden caster sugar

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think we’re an acquired taste ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Sure thing, please advise away!"

C minus. Could be better.

Your avatar is cool, I like photos that show you don’t take all this too serious. That’s cool. And the photo on the bench is really arty, honestly, that photo alone is a 10/10 photo for me. Very good.

So photos - a good 7

But your text reads like you’ve copy and pasted lines from other profiles. *just my opinion. And the blockable list at the end tells me exactly how to avoid getting blocked!

Text is worth 6/10 it’s okay, but could be a lot better.

*typed in red pen like your teacher used to, but this is literally my opinion. And just doing this for fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ooh my profile must be perfect

Not read it yet because it’s longer than the others

That's because I wanted to be precise

True. I read it well Siri did "

Any advice?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ooh, do me! I just do not get what the problem is!"

I wish more women would say this!!!!!

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Oh worldly men of the fab forums,

How do I make my profile more openly hostile so less wanking dead bother me, without becoming so rough it scares off the people who are actually interesting?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh worldly men of the fab forums,

How do I make my profile more openly hostile so less wanking dead bother me, without becoming so rough it scares off the people who are actually interesting?"

Video of you curling one out.

Only true heroes message those gals!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ooooo I'd love some advice on my profile "

Advice incoming. ….

You pictures get 3 points. (One for each you have + 1 extra for a pair of super sexy lips)

Photos 4/10

Text. You start on zero for kicking off with a rant!! Bad form.

You then gain a pint for all the things as follow.

You told me your sexy, (watch porn and wank)

How you dress. Your relationship status. How you like to meet. Who you like to meet…. And then I forget what else you wrote because I’m still remembering you said your hands are probably down your pants. So I’ll round these points up to 8/10. Note *in green pen -Could have had max points if you didn’t rant.

So you get a D. ….

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Oh worldly men of the fab forums,

How do I make my profile more openly hostile so less wanking dead bother me, without becoming so rough it scares off the people who are actually interesting?"

Shorten your text!!! Can you imagine anyone wanting to read that much when they have their cock in their hand?

So, get to the point in tryout first 3 lines or your asking for what you get.

*this is all said in jest.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually


"Video of you curling one out.

Only true heroes message those gals!"

I'd be tempted if I hadn't already dealt with some toe curlingly gross fans of such things vomiting their fantasies into my inbox today.

Any suggestions that would actually mean less poop fans in the inbox?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Video of you curling one out.

Only true heroes message those gals!

I'd be tempted if I hadn't already dealt with some toe curlingly gross fans of such things vomiting their fantasies into my inbox today.

Any suggestions that would actually mean less poop fans in the inbox?"

No see...here goes.

You give them what they want. They ALL come to you. You want them all there. Then, block city baby!

It's how I catch rats

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Okay, that’s enough from me, my aim was to do a few of you and i have. It was just for laughs, I’m sure you ladies have got it all under control and know what your doing.

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By *ong-leggedblondWoman
over a year ago

Next Door


"Okay, that’s enough from me, my aim was to do a few of you and i have. It was just for laughs, I’m sure you ladies have got it all under control and know what your doing.

"

Woody, I have no idea what I'm doing or who I'm doing.

Useless female here.

Help needed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ooh my profile must be perfect

Not read it yet because it’s longer than the others

That's because I wanted to be precise

True. I read it well Siri did

Any advice? "

Feet pics. Pretty feet is the first thing I notice, then it’s the boobs, face, hair then back at the boobs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ooh my profile must be perfect

Not read it yet because it’s longer than the others

That's because I wanted to be precise

True. I read it well Siri did

Any advice?

Feet pics. Pretty feet is the first thing I notice, then it’s the boobs, face, hair then back at the boobs."

Noted

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By *almprintsWoman
over a year ago

deepest, darkest West


"Okay, that’s enough from me, my aim was to do a few of you and i have. It was just for laughs, I’m sure you ladies have got it all under control and know what your doing.

"

Thank you, wise Woody

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Okay, that’s enough from me, my aim was to do a few of you and i have. It was just for laughs, I’m sure you ladies have got it all under control and know what your doing.

Thank you, wise Woody "

Haha. I forgot about this.

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"Okay, that’s enough from me, my aim was to do a few of you and i have.

"

I’d still like to do a few of the ladies on this thread.

Nudge-nudge. Wink-wink.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do it for me I’m waiting

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Do it for me I’m waiting

Mrs "

Felwinter? Do you do DnD?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do it for me I’m waiting

Mrs

Felwinter? Do you do DnD? "

Not at this time sorry

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Do it for me I’m waiting

Mrs

Felwinter? Do you do DnD?

Not at this time sorry "

My mistake. I thought your name was a reference tonDungeand and Dragons. (Feywild elves and Neverwinter.) I think I sank into a nerd mindset for a moment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do it for me I’m waiting

Mrs

Felwinter? Do you do DnD?

Not at this time sorry

My mistake. I thought your name was a reference tonDungeand and Dragons. (Feywild elves and Neverwinter.) I think I sank into a nerd mindset for a moment "

Think just a little overall what’s your opinion then ? Besides talking about dragons and mother of dragons.. in other words game of thrones

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By *ainbow_RoadWoman
over a year ago

Brighton

so,... if I say im in, does that mean someone will actually READ my profile??

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London


"so,... if I say im in, does that mean someone will actually READ my profile??"

Steady on. There’s limits you know.

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By *hyme2020Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow Scotland

If I could get some feedback other than “nice tits” it would be very much appreciated please from this shy gal

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By *uitednbooted2Man
over a year ago

Berkshire

Some shite womens profiles on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"so,... if I say im in, does that mean someone will actually READ my profile??"

Men can't read! Women can.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oooh! This is a good idea, I've been away from here for a while and I'm nervous profile text is naff I know. Still thinking of what to write

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in, so what's your verdict guy's

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By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago

Bognor Regis


"I think I've frozen out all but those with the thickest skins with my profile- I don't need advice but would be interested to hear opinions your write up great for the tourist board or trip advisor, she likes local "

Lol!! Absolutely!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Do it for me I’m waiting

Mrs

Felwinter? Do you do DnD?

Not at this time sorry

My mistake. I thought your name was a reference tonDungeand and Dragons. (Feywild elves and Neverwinter.) I think I sank into a nerd mindset for a moment

Think just a little overall what’s your opinion then ? Besides talking about dragons and mother of dragons.. in other words game of thrones "

Your pictures…..erm. Let me look at those again ….

Lose the dude and the photos are a 9.

(Face pics = 1pt )

Text. Very good, I even spell checked it for you and you passed. 9 points.

Avatar. Leading with the pretty lady of the couple is disappointing. It’s a couples account, bring the dude back for that picture

Half of the couple mean 1/2 point.

Grade C.

C for cracking profile.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do it for me I’m waiting

Mrs

Felwinter? Do you do DnD?

Not at this time sorry

My mistake. I thought your name was a reference tonDungeand and Dragons. (Feywild elves and Neverwinter.) I think I sank into a nerd mindset for a moment

Think just a little overall what’s your opinion then ? Besides talking about dragons and mother of dragons.. in other words game of thrones

Your pictures…..erm. Let me look at those again ….

Lose the dude and the photos are a 9.

(Face pics = 1pt )

Text. Very good, I even spell checked it for you and you passed. 9 points.

Avatar. Leading with the pretty lady of the couple is disappointing. It’s a couples account, bring the dude back for that picture

Half of the couple mean 1/2 point.

Grade C.

C for cracking profile. "

Sadly you’re not on friends list,so about couple I give you that. Rest of it agreed on. liked it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m in

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

I'm not a woman but I'd never ask for advice here lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'm not a woman but I'd never ask for advice here lol "

If you can’t take dark humour or laugh about yourself,then this isn’t for you clearly. Tip tap on

Mrs

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester


"I'm not a woman but I'd never ask for advice here lol

If you can’t take dark humour or laugh about yourself,then this isn’t for you clearly. Tip tap on

Mrs "

oh i can and my comment was dark

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By *BootyfulDayWoman
over a year ago

Ooooooo I do need to redo mine anyway

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm in, so what's your verdict guy's "

I’ve got a pile of marking to do. I’m hoping others could help.

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

The only advice woody wants to give you is where he lives and what to wear oh and bring a pen

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Ooooooo I do need to redo mine anyway "

Avatar. Your already sat down so it seems which is good. Max points.

Also forum challenge photos!!! = bonus points. 12pts

Text. The begging bit doesn’t just scare off silly messenger, it scares off EVERYONE!! Let’s be honest, it sounds like lyrics from the Spice Girls. Let me tell you what I want/don’t want/want …. down to zero. But we then read the rest and you don’t sound like RantyMcRanty knickers. Good second half!…like England at the World Cup.

B- good effort, but you missed. (Again, like England at the World Cup)

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By *BootyfulDayWoman
over a year ago


"Ooooooo I do need to redo mine anyway

Avatar. Your already sat down so it seems which is good. Max points.

Also forum challenge photos!!! = bonus points. 12pts

Text. The begging bit doesn’t just scare off silly messenger, it scares off EVERYONE!! Let’s be honest, it sounds like lyrics from the Spice Girls. Let me tell you what I want/don’t want/want …. down to zero. But we then read the rest and you don’t sound like RantyMcRanty knickers. Good second half!…like England at the World Cup.

B- good effort, but you missed. (Again, like England at the World Cup) "

Not sure how I feel being compared to the England World Cup team twice

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By *BootyfulDayWoman
over a year ago


"Ooooooo I do need to redo mine anyway

Avatar. Your already sat down so it seems which is good. Max points.

Also forum challenge photos!!! = bonus points. 12pts

Text. The begging bit doesn’t just scare off silly messenger, it scares off EVERYONE!! Let’s be honest, it sounds like lyrics from the Spice Girls. Let me tell you what I want/don’t want/want …. down to zero. But we then read the rest and you don’t sound like RantyMcRanty knickers. Good second half!…like England at the World Cup.

B- good effort, but you missed. (Again, like England at the World Cup)

Not sure how I feel being compared to the England World Cup team twice "

Also I like the title RantyMcRant knickers

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