FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Look at me

Jump to newest
 

By *r Sprout OP   Man
over a year ago

the middle somewhere

It’s a new year so new opportunities to introduce yourself to new people. Post here if you feel like you have something to offer to fab.

Who knows it could lead to a message being read! *

*Posting in this thread does not guarantee your message being read. But people will check you out before reading any potential messages (ninja mode enabled)

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey Ladies and Couples! Mr Sprout is a funny guy with great pics.

December 2021 is a sight to see!!

Treat him with respect and don't pass him by! X

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All I have to offer is sarcasm and an ass that won't quit.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *icecock9999Man
over a year ago

Oxford

I’m a kind, gentle and respectful fella with a handsome tool for couples and singles

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ustincider888Man
over a year ago

Preston Ish

I'm in but not much to offer

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Good morning group.

My name is Tarquin and I’m a bit of a sarcastic prick.

The mr

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"All I have to offer is sarcasm and an ass that won't quit."

I like both those traits

I like think I could offer some of my own dark wit/humour. I’m not a people person and socially awkward in a crowds, but consider myself polite and respectful to others - I know! I’m confused too!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *hosewhomgonakedCouple
over a year ago

Scotland

Pics and vids we hope you enjoy. X

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ornywelsh2sumCouple
over a year ago

Neath valley.

Hi all john here. We are welsh, funny as fuck. And dispite popular belief us welsh guys dont shag sheep .

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *olex99Man
over a year ago

Hull


"All I have to offer is sarcasm and an ass that won't quit."

You had me at "ass that won't quit"

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire


"Hi all john here. We are welsh, funny as fuck. And dispite popular belief us welsh guys dont shag sheep . "
.. my best mate is welsh and he said he did shag sheep..

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Good morning group.

My name is Tarquin and I’m a bit of a sarcastic prick.

The mr "

Such a liar! Your name isn’t Tarquin

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ncemoreroundthesunCouple
over a year ago

A town and place not in the UK


"Pics and vids we hope you enjoy. X"

Very enjoyable

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *red333Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

Im an enigmatic, charismatic laundromatic kind of guy with an all over tan, come say hi love sprouts

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *BootyfulDayWoman
over a year ago

…

Hmmmm not sure what I can offer….some tequila perhaps?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ornywelsh2sumCouple
over a year ago

Neath valley.


"Hi all john here. We are welsh, funny as fuck. And dispite popular belief us welsh guys dont shag sheep . .. my best mate is welsh and he said he did shag sheep.."

Maybe he trying to give the english extra protein in the welsh lamb

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire


"Hi all john here. We are welsh, funny as fuck. And dispite popular belief us welsh guys dont shag sheep . .. my best mate is welsh and he said he did shag sheep..

Maybe he trying to give the english extra protein in the welsh lamb"
,, thank god im irish

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford


"Hmmmm not sure what I can offer….some tequila perhaps? "

You are pretty, funny, with a gorgeous voice, lips, and breasts. Don't undersell yourself...and no tequila for me, please.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gd morning all fabbers

Down to earth guy looking for friendship laugh’s and fun.

Have a little look at me, I will always reply back to you x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville


"Gd morning all fabbers

Down to earth guy looking for friendship laugh’s and fun.

Have a little look at me, I will always reply back to you x "

Mwah hahaha!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Gd morning all fabbers

Down to earth guy looking for friendship laugh’s and fun.

Have a little look at me, I will always reply back to you x

Mwah hahaha!!"

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hello ladies.

My name is Woody, and you could B orgasming on my hard WOOD if you choose me.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford


"Hello ladies.

My name is Woody, and you could B orgasming on my hard WOOD if you choose me. "

Cilla, thou should'st be living at this hour.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good Morning

You would get feck all from me

Oh

Except for food

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *unthum62Man
over a year ago

Benidorm

I was never very good at advertising. I am just me.

Favourite customer comments.

"Fuck, you are good at that"

"Oh god I love your fingers"

For fucks sake never take viagra"

You can try me and put me back on the shelf if you don't like me.

I am easy like that. Lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *illie fitMan
over a year ago

wonderland

I’m Tom, too short, too fat, with a tiny cock

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford

I'm going to start marketing myself as a Fab PR agent, because some people could do with a lot more confidence and a little more stardust.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *BootyfulDayWoman
over a year ago

…


"Hmmmm not sure what I can offer….some tequila perhaps?

You are pretty, funny, with a gorgeous voice, lips, and breasts. Don't undersell yourself...and no tequila for me, please.

"

No tequila? Margarita instead?

But aww you have just made me blush for the first time in 2023 you are far too charming for your own good

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *BootyfulDayWoman
over a year ago

…


"I'm going to start marketing myself as a Fab PR agent, because some people could do with a lot more confidence and a little more stardust. "

Will you market people by talking? Because your voice would sell anything

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

Roll up roll up. Hairy chested, bit girthy, appreciator of curves, have been called a gent. And I can usually string a sentence or two together.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ingerie whoreTV/TS
over a year ago

kirk hammerton


"All I have to offer is sarcasm and an ass that won't quit."
lol we are very alike x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Roll up roll up. Hairy chested, bit girthy, appreciator of curves, have been called a gent. And I can usually string a sentence or two together. "

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lynJMan
over a year ago

Morden

I bake cakes.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Pics and vids we hope you enjoy. X"

Great cocks of 2022 video. Very hot indeed

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

I..... I.......I.. I

I got nothin'.......

Winston

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Me I bring nothing more than a winning smile and hairy arse along with a hefty does of sarcastic and inappropriate wit.

No wonder I'm single and sexless hahaha

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *imply DeeWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

Good morning, group!

My name is Dee and I don’t have too much to offer but I enjoy being around and I think I’m a decent human after all.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi, I'm Pete and I've just seen Digby the biggest dog in the world. He's one big fellow!

You can be sure of it

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire


"I bake cakes. "

If you were female, I’d flirt with you right now

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lynJMan
over a year ago

Morden


"I bake cakes.

If you were female, I’d flirt with you right now "

That's more of a response than I was expecting.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham


"Roll up roll up. Hairy chested, bit girthy, appreciator of curves, have been called a gent. And I can usually string a sentence or two together.

"

Right back at you.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *atricia ParnelWoman
over a year ago

In a town full of colours

Compy here. Sharp witted and sarcastic

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hello ladies.

My name is Woody, and you could B orgasming on my hard WOOD if you choose me.

Cilla, thou should'st be living at this hour. "

It’s just a lorra lorra fun!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Compy here. Sharp witted and sarcastic "

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ingerie whoreTV/TS
over a year ago

kirk hammerton


"Good morning, group!

My name is Dee and I don’t have too much to offer but I enjoy being around and I think I’m a decent human after all.

"
you look like a angel to me x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds


"Good morning group.

My name is Tarquin and I’m a bit of a sarcastic prick.

The mr

Such a liar! Your name isn’t Tarquin "

Keep your voice down will you! I’m trying to get free cake.

The mr

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...


"Compy here. Sharp witted and sarcastic, maker of unique lingerie "

There's a category you'd win.

Winston

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hello I am am natalie I am wonderful and fun loveing and bubbly

I can be very kind and romantic and have a awesome wicked sens off style

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I offer big hands, angry sex, and toejobs

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I offer big hands, angry sex, and toejobs"

Lost me at toejobs.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got cake and half a tub of Roses

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I got cake and half a tub of Roses "

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I offer big hands, angry sex, and toejobs

Lost me at toejobs."

I'm right here silly!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

Sensual petite exotic asian here

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"I offer big hands, angry sex, and toejobs

Lost me at toejobs."

And angry sex... I'm out

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I offer big hands, angry sex, and toejobs

Lost me at toejobs.

And angry sex... I'm out "

Oh no I'm in for the angry sex!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I offer big hands, angry sex, and toejobs

Lost me at toejobs.

And angry sex... I'm out "

But BIG HANDS cherry!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can offer forgettable sex and a slightly chubby hairy body.

Who's in?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

Hi. I’m Littlebird and all I have to offer is Haribo. But I will only share them with you if you’re really really nice to me.

* not the cola bottles, obviously

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im a lovely soft genuine guy thats non pushey and loves adoring a lady . Eager to pleasure and is a laster im not massively photgenic but im fitter in the fleash im fun and kind and open to mosy things and just wanna connecy sexually with someone who appreciates a man that isnt selfish in bed ...

Maybe 23 will be the yeat i actually meet on fab xx

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can offer forgettable sex and a slightly chubby hairy body.

Who's in?

"
.. wanted u for a long time but ur out my league xx

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *r-8-BBCMan
over a year ago

LONDON


"It’s a new year so new opportunities to introduce yourself to new people. Post here if you feel like you have something to offer to fab.

Who knows it could lead to a message being read! *

*Posting in this thread does not guarantee your message being read. But people will check you out before reading any potential messages (ninja mode enabled)"

My honesty is enough, i am not the one to play games with people.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham, North Yorkshire and can travel

Not much to see here except tits, more tits and a toned torso, oh, and did we mention tits?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can offer forgettable sex and a slightly chubby hairy body.

Who's in?

.. wanted u for a long time but ur out my league xx"

Never think that!!! No one is above anyone else, and if they think they are, fuck em. Well don't actually , I don't think they'd let you.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)


"I can offer forgettable sex and a slightly chubby hairy body.

Who's in?

"

I’d love to be in but keep getting rebuffed…

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can offer forgettable sex and a slightly chubby hairy body.

Who's in?

.. wanted u for a long time but ur out my league xx

Never think that!!! No one is above anyone else, and if they think they are, fuck em. Well don't actually , I don't think they'd let you."

Such is the fragile state of male fabbers we all know our place

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can offer forgettable sex and a slightly chubby hairy body.

Who's in?

I’d love to be in but keep getting rebuffed…"

I hear she can be a bit fickle.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *wistedsoul35Man
over a year ago

cumbria

I'm in, what can I offer.... 36seconds of pure raw passion, after which I'll just lay on top till it goes soft and slips out.

I imagine I'll now be inundated with messages, so please bear with me I will get back to you all

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can offer forgettable sex and a slightly chubby hairy body.

Who's in?

.. wanted u for a long time but ur out my league xx

Never think that!!! No one is above anyone else, and if they think they are, fuck em. Well don't actually , I don't think they'd let you."

Ypur defo put of mine iv messaged u the odd time as where local but sadlt never recived a reply hehehe so yeah ur defo out of my reach sadly as ur gorgeous xx

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

I’m a mildly grumpy, curmudgeonly, middle aged man with a lumpy tummy. Apparently I’m a good kisser though

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m a mildly grumpy, curmudgeonly, middle aged man with a lumpy tummy. Apparently I’m a good kisser though "

He is...

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)


"I can offer forgettable sex and a slightly chubby hairy body.

Who's in?

I’d love to be in but keep getting rebuffed…

I hear she can be a bit fickle. "

I like fickle.

Sorry. I misspelt ‘you’

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *.R.MMan
over a year ago

Norfolk

Hi, I’ve been here a while and seen so many come and go, it’s changed over the years but I have still quite a bit to offer. Trying to fit in is the difficult part

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ittlemissmistressKCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

I'm very curvy, funny,kind but grumpy at times and my superpower is making wine disappear lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *oanne ETV/TS
over a year ago

Near Warrington

I can offer a vivid imagination, saucy attitude, wandering hands and a wicked tongue

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hello to all I'm bringing unwanted opinions to the forums, the odd bit of humour when I manage to pull it off and every now and then, a willy pic on a Wednesday

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can offer the best home made lemon drizzle cake

Dad jokes

Whit&sarcasm

And mind blowing kisses

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *r-8-BBCMan
over a year ago

LONDON


"I can offer the best home made lemon drizzle cake

Dad jokes

Whit&sarcasm

And mind blowing kisses "

I love kisses

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Slightly grumpy scottish bird who dislikes being overly affectionate. I won’t be hugging you after but I can make you a sandwich.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im not very good at blowing my own trumpet. Been trying for 45 years and its not quite long enough.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ornycougaWoman
over a year ago

Wherever I lay my hat


"All I have to offer is sarcasm and an ass that won't quit."

I've just got the sarcasm

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't bother with moi...I'm as dull as dishwater, shit at sex and will leave you utterly unfulfilled

Reverse psychology might work

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can offer the best home made lemon drizzle cake

Dad jokes

Whit&sarcasm

And mind blowing kisses

I love kisses "

Glad to hear it

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Looking for a fuck buddy no longer into one offs

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ily Con CarneTV/TS
over a year ago

Cornwall

I am a social creature more than a sexual one but I can offer warmth,friendship, companionship and somewhere to live if you're homeless,

(oh and I'm really funny)

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can offer forgettable sex and a slightly chubby hairy body.

Who's in?

"

*puts hand up.

(Probably he wrong turn of phrase )

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *elix SightedMan
over a year ago

Cloud 8

Hello all! I feel like I’m so much more than the sum of my parts, but that’s hard to articulate in a snappy bio.

I’m fun company, chatty, good kisser and selfless. Oh - and the holder of the biggest collection of groaner jokes ever. Gotta be worth a go haha

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford

Delete according to preference/opinion.

I have:

A) gorgeous, or B) intimidating eyes.

A) great vocabulary, or B) boring and pompous.

A) bang average dick, or B) handsome cock.

But I definitely have a voice that women seem to enjoy, good lips, wicked fingers and imagination, and, I like to think, a noble set of calves.

All this unsullied splendour can be yours for the special New Year sale price of a friendly message and a pot of Earl Grey.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *red333Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

Im here

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *adyinred696969Couple
over a year ago

Brecon

Hi all.

We are perverts.

#sorrynotsorry

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire


"I offer big hands, angry sex, and toejobs

Lost me at toejobs.

And angry sex... I'm out

But BIG HANDS cherry! "

Only if it comes with a very handsome vwe man, I think about it...but not keen on angry sex.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I offer big hands, angry sex, and toejobs

Lost me at toejobs.

And angry sex... I'm out

But BIG HANDS cherry!

Only if it comes with a very handsome vwe man, I think about it...but not keen on angry sex. "

Cherry we are gonna fall in love in 2023. That's my resolution. Don't worry about it it'll happen naturally xx

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Smiley, fun redhead, looking for new friends who like sex.

Only problem is, you have to prise me off my sofa first

#RecluseLife #IVantToBeAlone

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Slightly grumpy scottish bird who dislikes being overly affectionate. I won’t be hugging you after but I can make you a sandwich. "

After what now?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here "

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Smiley, fun redhead, looking for new friends who like sex.

Only problem is, you have to prise me off my sofa first

#RecluseLife #IVantToBeAlone"

Can I lie on the sofa with you/on top of you/below you/inside you.

I'm really open to whatever works for you.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford


"Smiley, fun redhead, looking for new friends who like sex.

Only problem is, you have to prise me off my sofa first

#RecluseLife #IVantToBeAlone"

I'm going to lure you out with a trail of cheesy snacks and cheesy chat. Like Hansel and Gretel, but with a 12% less hot ending.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)


"Smiley, fun redhead, looking for new friends who like sex.

Only problem is, you have to prise me off my sofa first

#RecluseLife #IVantToBeAlone"

The other problem is how far away you are…

#OnYouOnTheSofa #SadTimes

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *pYaMan
over a year ago

whereever you are…

I have cheesecake and Lemon puffs to offer

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke


"

Delete according to preference/opinion.

I have:

A) gorgeous, or B) intimidating eyes.

A) great vocabulary, or B) boring and pompous.

A) bang average dick, or B) handsome cock.

But I definitely have a voice that women seem to enjoy, good lips, wicked fingers and imagination, and, I like to think, a noble set of calves.

All this unsullied splendour can be yours for the special New Year sale price of a friendly message and a pot of Earl Grey."

Earl Grey coming right up

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford


"

Earl Grey coming right up "

And this also counts as the friendly message...

Oh, you are good.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm happily niche and enjoy savouring things.... can't rush... like sucking a good toffee til your tongue aches and all you have left is a lovely taste in your mouth and a hunger for more

Some might say I'm like a classic vintage oven.... not instaheat like an induction hob.... but you can use all your best and favourite things with me....

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

Oh, I don't know about my USP, but it's clear we're not lacking in self-deprecation here in The Lounge, so I won't go for that.

I do a good line in pedantry, if anyone wants a proofreader for their profiles or messages. Sorry to bring quite so much heat to the thread.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford


"Oh, I don't know about my USP, but it's clear we're not lacking in self-deprecation here in The Lounge, so I won't go for that.

I do a good line in pedantry, if anyone wants a proofreader for their profiles or messages. Sorry to bring quite so much heat to the thread. "

Phwoar! I do love a grammar fiend.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh, I don't know about my USP, but it's clear we're not lacking in self-deprecation here in The Lounge, so I won't go for that.

I do a good line in pedantry, if anyone wants a proofreader for their profiles or messages. Sorry to bring quite so much heat to the thread.

Phwoar! I do love a grammar fiend."

Can't beat a GILF.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more"

You never know it could lead to something good

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Slightly grumpy scottish bird who dislikes being overly affectionate. I won’t be hugging you after but I can make you a sandwich.

After what now?"

The sex.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Delete according to preference/opinion.

I have:

A) gorgeous, or B) intimidating eyes.

A) great vocabulary, or B) boring and pompous.

A) bang average dick, or B) handsome cock.

But I definitely have a voice that women seem to enjoy, good lips, wicked fingers and imagination, and, I like to think, a noble set of calves.

All this unsullied splendour can be yours for the special New Year sale price of a friendly message and a pot of Earl Grey."

Gorgeous eyes

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more

You never know it could lead to something good"

I could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking my thumb...

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Smiley, fun redhead, looking for new friends who like sex.

Only problem is, you have to prise me off my sofa first

#RecluseLife #IVantToBeAlone"

How about being pinned back down onto that sofa?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford


"

Gorgeous eyes "

Oh my. Thank you! I might be blushing. That's a very lovely thing to say.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ickdasterdly51Man
over a year ago

Lingfield

Honest (honestly!), respectful, non pushy (probably too much so), shy, nervous, in reasonable shape for my age but with a very dirty mind!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Gorgeous eyes

Oh my. Thank you! I might be blushing. That's a very lovely thing to say."

Your welcome,the rest of you looks mighty fine to

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more

You never know it could lead to something good

I could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking my thumb... "

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more

You never know it could lead to something good

I could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking my thumb...

"

Don't laugh, I'm not funny!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more

You never know it could lead to something good

I could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking my thumb...

Don't laugh, I'm not funny!! "

I know,a giggle just slipped our though

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more

You never know it could lead to something good

I could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking my thumb...

Don't laugh, I'm not funny!!

I know,a giggle just slipped our though "

A giggle? With 6 hmmmm!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more

You never know it could lead to something good

I could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking my thumb...

Don't laugh, I'm not funny!!

I know,a giggle just slipped our though

A giggle? With 6 hmmmm!"

I had the hic ups

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more

You never know it could lead to something good

I could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking my thumb...

Don't laugh, I'm not funny!!

I know,a giggle just slipped our though

A giggle? With 6 hmmmm!

I had the hic ups "

Is that a cryptic excuse for tourettes

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more

You never know it could lead to something good

I could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking my thumb...

Don't laugh, I'm not funny!!

I know,a giggle just slipped our though

A giggle? With 6 hmmmm!

I had the hic ups

Is that a cryptic excuse for tourettes "

Damn sussed

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more

You never know it could lead to something good

I could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking my thumb...

Don't laugh, I'm not funny!!

I know,a giggle just slipped our though

A giggle? With 6 hmmmm!

I had the hic ups

Is that a cryptic excuse for tourettes

Damn sussed "

Could be worse, I have a lisp, my laugh sounds like a deflating tyre!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Don’t look at me. I’m shy.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke


"Don’t look at me. I’m shy."

^^ this is a lie

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow


"^^ this is a lie "

Only a little one.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"^^ this is a lie

Only a little one. "

Ha, not something I'd admit to!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey,

I do my utmost to be a respectful gentleman to everyone I meet, I love to cook, and I can be quite charming when the mood takes me.

Very passionate in the bedroom, and a lot of foreplay is a must

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *rettyflamingoCouple
over a year ago

Where the flamboyance of flamingos live

I’m in I have class and sassiness

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m in I have class and sassiness "

Sensing you don't struggle to attract

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *os Amantes 22Couple
over a year ago

sexy lane

Hello and happy new year everyone

Miss L has the most amazing ass which I hope some of you will see more of this year

Including myself

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *rtyIanMan
over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons

I could cook for you, write you a poem or do a piece of art

I’m kind and selfless and have heeling hands

Not sure that’s of use to anyone on fab mind but that’s part of what I offer

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *rettyflamingoCouple
over a year ago

Where the flamboyance of flamingos live


"I’m in I have class and sassiness

Sensing you don't struggle to attract"

Going by your pics and profile I’m sure you don’t x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *oubletroubleCouple
over a year ago

South West

Hi all and wishing you a happy new year.

We offer left over mince pies.

Janet and John x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *os Amantes 22Couple
over a year ago

sexy lane


"Hi all and wishing you a happy new year.

We offer left over mince pies.

Janet and John x

Get the kettle on ....we will bring the custard

"

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair

I sit behind the façade of the Fab apparatus. I am two degrees of separation from most forumites, placed in the centre of the Venn Diagram looking outward at their fragile connections and friendships, getting caught in the slipstream of the 'UNLOS' currents.

I peddle jocularity.

I enjoy lighthearted dialogue on the Fora.

I treasure immutable friendships.

I crave basorexia.

I seek clandestine encounters.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sensual petite exotic asian here

Well I'm looking, alas I feel it'll be nothing more

You never know it could lead to something good

I could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking my thumb...

Don't laugh, I'm not funny!!

I know,a giggle just slipped our though

A giggle? With 6 hmmmm!

I had the hic ups

Is that a cryptic excuse for tourettes

Damn sussed

Could be worse, I have a lisp, my laugh sounds like a deflating tyre!! "

Hahahaha

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London


"I sit behind the façade of the Fab apparatus. I am two degrees of separation from most forumites, placed in the centre of the Venn Diagram looking outward at their fragile connections and friendships, getting caught in the slipstream of the 'UNLOS' currents.

I peddle jocularity.

I enjoy lighthearted dialogue on the Fora.

I treasure immutable friendships.

I crave basorexia.

I seek clandestine encounters."

Had to Google basorexia, but pleased to be acquainted with that word!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey,

I do my utmost to be a respectful gentleman to everyone I meet, I love to cook, and I can be quite charming when the mood takes me.

Very passionate in the bedroom, and a lot of foreplay is a must"

Just my kind of Gent

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *oo..Woman
over a year ago

Boo's World


"I sit behind the façade of the Fab apparatus. I am two degrees of separation from most forumites, placed in the centre of the Venn Diagram looking outward at their fragile connections and friendships, getting caught in the slipstream of the 'UNLOS' currents.

I peddle jocularity.

I enjoy lighthearted dialogue on the Fora.

I treasure immutable friendships.

I crave basorexia.

I seek clandestine encounters."

Can often be found sat in Wetherspoons reading the Daily Mail.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke


"I sit behind the façade of the Fab apparatus. I am two degrees of separation from most forumites, placed in the centre of the Venn Diagram looking outward at their fragile connections and friendships, getting caught in the slipstream of the 'UNLOS' currents.

I peddle jocularity.

I enjoy lighthearted dialogue on the Fora.

I treasure immutable friendships.

I crave basorexia.

I seek clandestine encounters.

Can often be found sat in Wetherspoons reading the Daily Mail. "

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair


"I sit behind the façade of the Fab apparatus. I am two degrees of separation from most forumites, placed in the centre of the Venn Diagram looking outward at their fragile connections and friendships, getting caught in the slipstream of the 'UNLOS' currents.

I peddle jocularity.

I enjoy lighthearted dialogue on the Fora.

I treasure immutable friendships.

I crave basorexia.

I seek clandestine encounters.

Can often be found sat in Wetherspoons reading the Daily Mail. "

•

One of these days I'm going to seductively strip you naked and spank you with my Lexicon!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *rincipessaWoman
over a year ago

your wildest dreams,

Sharer of fruit gums, as long as you don’t want my green ones

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *oo..Woman
over a year ago

Boo's World


"I sit behind the façade of the Fab apparatus. I am two degrees of separation from most forumites, placed in the centre of the Venn Diagram looking outward at their fragile connections and friendships, getting caught in the slipstream of the 'UNLOS' currents.

I peddle jocularity.

I enjoy lighthearted dialogue on the Fora.

I treasure immutable friendships.

I crave basorexia.

I seek clandestine encounters.

Can often be found sat in Wetherspoons reading the Daily Mail.

•

One of these days I'm going to seductively strip you naked and spank you with my Lexicon! "

I'll bring a ladder to the next social, give you a fighting chance to look me in the eyes first

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *BootyfulDayWoman
over a year ago

…


"

Delete according to preference/opinion.

I have:

A) gorgeous, or B) intimidating eyes.

A) great vocabulary, or B) boring and pompous.

A) bang average dick, or B) handsome cock.

But I definitely have a voice that women seem to enjoy, good lips, wicked fingers and imagination, and, I like to think, a noble set of calves.

All this unsullied splendour can be yours for the special New Year sale price of a friendly message and a pot of Earl Grey."

How wicked?

Oh gosh! I don’t have any earl grey! The disappointment of being a non tea drinker

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

Big tits, flirty & energetic. Those are probably my most fab-appropriate qualities.

But I’m also incredibly picky, terrible memory & awful at making plans.

Proper catch I am . Form an orderly queue - lol

Mrs m

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Big tits, flirty & energetic. Those are probably my most fab-appropriate qualities.

But I’m also incredibly picky, terrible memory & awful at making plans.

Proper catch I am . Form an orderly queue - lol

Mrs m

"

Fuck, well I would!!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford


"

How wicked?

Oh gosh! I don’t have any earl grey! The disappointment of being a non tea drinker "

Not really for me to say how wicked. But they make everything beautifully messy, it's only fair to warn.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford


"Big tits, flirty & energetic. Those are probably my most fab-appropriate qualities.

But I’m also incredibly picky, terrible memory & awful at making plans.

Proper catch I am . Form an orderly queue - lol

Mrs m

"

Queue already formed. I'm even patient.

Fairly patient, anyway.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am selling my grey Talbo x

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *orfy_n_pollyCouple
over a year ago

near to Downham Market

Don’t look, our mugshots are being circulated by Interpol - I’m an international jewel thief and Polly is my accomplice. We are skilled in using oxyacetylene torches and kango hammers - if anyone has any safe-breaking needs we have much to offer.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North


"I am selling my grey Talbo x "

If it’s a Sunbeam then I’m on it like a rocket

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am selling my grey Talbo x

If it’s a Sunbeam then I’m on it like a rocket "

When can you come to pick it up ? I need the money to buy myself a narrow boat.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North


"I am selling my grey Talbo x

If it’s a Sunbeam then I’m on it like a rocket

When can you come to pick it up ? I need the money to buy myself a narrow boat. "

Will you take a traveller’s cheque?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ddictedToLoveMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

Hey. I can cook so I could make you brownies and muffins? I got some nice memes and interesting facts I could tell you

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if you can

i can be hard to see as im mostly invisible

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can offer social awkwardness in abundance, and an inability to be attracted to be most people.

A great combination.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can offer social awkwardness in abundance, and an inability to be attracted to be most people.

A great combination. "

That because you're cheeky

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford


"I can offer social awkwardness in abundance, and an inability to be attracted to be most people.

A great combination. "

This is me,too!

Obviously it means we are extremely unlikely to be drawn to each other, or to ever mention it if by some chance we are. But, you know, solidarity from afar.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am selling my grey Talbo x

If it’s a Sunbeam then I’m on it like a rocket

When can you come to pick it up ? I need the money to buy myself a narrow boat.

Will you take a traveller’s cheque? "

Yes as I like to get fucked

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Don’t look at me. I’m shy."

This is such a niche reference, but…

Titty Bang Bang?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *oeBeansMan
over a year ago

Derby

I can offer shit jokes, terrible flirting and an awkward disposition. Come and get me ladies

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m just here for the comments….. I have naff all to offer

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *bizzleMan
over a year ago

Witham

A good smile, a guaranteed laugh and a tongue that never gets tired!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *inger_80Man
over a year ago

Merthyr Vale

Evening.

I have a tongue like a snake, a medium nail but a huge hammer to hammer it with!

Im also a sarcastic dark sense of humoured prick lol

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *lynJMan
over a year ago

Morden


"I’m just here for the comments….. I have naff all to offer "

I wouldn't say that. You have eyes a man could drown in.

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Evening.

I have a tongue like a snake, a medium nail but a huge hammer to hammer it with!

Im also a sarcastic dark sense of humoured prick lol"

And your a redhead

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ezzelsMan
over a year ago

cheshire and north wales

I can offer a picnic with nice butties and rola cola..and some crisps and fondant fancies..and a lovely genuine nature..and perhaps a poem..if you want a poem mail me..I’ll read your profile and select the one I think would be for you..

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *adyinred696969Couple
over a year ago

Brecon


"Hi all.

We are perverts.

#sorrynotsorry "

Wow

....................@ (tumble)

Would it help if I said Jayne can knit and I make a decent mug of coffee?

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"if you can

i can be hard to see as im mostly invisible"

I always notice you actually

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow


"This is such a niche reference, but…

Titty Bang Bang?

"

I wasn’t thinking that, but now you mention it!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria


"I can offer shit jokes, terrible flirting and an awkward disposition. Come and get me ladies "

You forgot ... and the ‘odd’ doughnut

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *asmine xxxWoman
over a year ago

Cornwall, Bristol

I have boobs

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *oeBeansMan
over a year ago

Derby


"I can offer shit jokes, terrible flirting and an awkward disposition. Come and get me ladies

You forgot ... and the ‘odd’ doughnut "

Maybe that should've been my new name

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *loveturfMan
over a year ago

Your bedroom

I make the best tea on fab and give a serious back rub

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria


"I can offer shit jokes, terrible flirting and an awkward disposition. Come and get me ladies

You forgot ... and the ‘odd’ doughnut

Maybe that should've been my new name "

Odd Doughnut??

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I have boobs "

Yes you most certainly do

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are lovely people who cry a lot at the tele

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Genuine guy with a long tongue

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
 
 

By *unRunFun7965Man
over a year ago

Pittsburgh

I’m new to Fab and pleasantly surprised how nice everyone is. What I bring is positive vibes. And the hope that everyone finds what they’re looking for!

 (closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately
back to top