FabSwingers.com forum: Fab Island.

By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

The Fab cruise ship has unfortunately hit a reef, and is sinking. Fortunately,there are sufficient lifeboats for all, but NOT for all the luggage. A beautiful, uninhabited tropical island with abundant food and fresh water is just on the horizon.

1: What 3 portable items do you save from the wreck, and why?

2: What is the first thing you will do on arrival?

3: What will be your most valuable skills?

For me...

1) Proust, an ultra-sharp knife and sunblock, so I can finally get around to reading A La Recherche, shave and start fires, and not get skin cancer/horrendous burns.

2) Explore, I think, and make a map. I love drawing and walking.

3) I can build shelters, start fires,and cook...but probably listening will be the most useful skill for a long stay.

Over to you! I can't wait to learn all about your reactions in extremis.

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By *ull English with teaMan
over a year ago

London

Can I take Tina Titz for a buoyancy aid in the choppy waters?

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I am a master in the art of delegation and can shout rousing and inspiring instructions from the sidelines (under the palm tree, whilst sipping on coconut juice)

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

I'd take a kindle and a solar powered charger as I couldn't cope without my books. Plus a big cosy blanket as however tropical it'd still get cold at night.

On arrival I suppose I'd find the sexiest looking man and put my claim on him.

And as for skills, well I have an amazing sense of humour so could cheer everyone up. That or get my boobs out

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

This has Lord of the Flies written all over it..

I’m not taking my glasses.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1. Phone , sun cream because I’d burn to a crisp and toiletries because hygiene.

2. Panic

3. I can cook

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By *uckoldDesiresMan
over a year ago

Dublin

"The Fab cruise ship has unfortunately hit a reef, and is sinking. Fortunately,there are sufficient lifeboats for all, but NOT for all the luggage. A beautiful, uninhabited tropical island with abundant food and fresh water is just on the horizon.

1: What 3 portable items do you save from the wreck, and why?

2: What is the first thing you will do on arrival?

3: What will be your most valuable skills?

For me...

1) Proust, an ultra-sharp knife and sunblock, so I can finally get around to reading A La Recherche, shave and start fires, and not get skin cancer/horrendous burns.

2) Explore, I think, and make a map. I love drawing and walking.

3) I can build shelters, start fires,and cook...but probably listening will be the most useful skill for a long stay.

Over to you! I can't wait to learn all about your reactions in extremis.

How can you make a map with no pen and paper in your 3 items?

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"Can I take Tina Titz for a buoyancy aid in the choppy waters? "

Tina is, last time I looked, not easily portable, though perhaps deflatable in case of emergencies.

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

1: What 3 portable items do you save from the wreck, and why?

2: What is the first thing you will do on arrival?

3: What will be your most valuable skills?

For me...

1) Proust, an ultra-sharp knife and sunblock, so I can finally get around to reading A La Recherche, shave and start fires, and not get skin cancer/horrendous burns.

2) Explore, I think, and make a map. I love drawing and walking.

3) I can build shelters, start fires,and cook...but probably listening will be the most useful skill for a long stay.

Over to you! I can't wait to learn all about your reactions in extremis.

How can you make a map with no pen and paper in your 3 items?"

Bark and charcoal work well.

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"I'd take a kindle and a solar powered charger as I couldn't cope without my books. Plus a big cosy blanket as however tropical it'd still get cold at night.

On arrival I suppose I'd find the sexiest looking man and put my claim on him.

And as for skills, well I have an amazing sense of humour so could cheer everyone up. That or get my boobs out

If you could tell jokes which you laugh at WHILST getting your boobs out, I think we could fairly claim to have regained Paradise.

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"This has Lord of the Flies written all over it..

I’m not taking my glasses."

But do you have ass-mar?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m pretty sure I’d kill myself as I despise tropical islands and hot weather in general

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"1. Phone , sun cream because I’d burn to a crisp and toiletries because hygiene.

2. Panic

3. I can cook

Scottish people and sunshine is a cruel combination, I know. We'll build Casa El Shiv first, I promise, and with extra-shady palm leaves.

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"This has Lord of the Flies written all over it..

I’m not taking my glasses.

But do you have ass-mar?"

Oh god. Nooooo

I’m piggy

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"I’m pretty sure I’d kill myself as I despise tropical islands and hot weather in general "

Oh, Cherry!

Show me on the doll whete Bora-Bora hurt you.

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"I'd take a kindle and a solar powered charger as I couldn't cope without my books. Plus a big cosy blanket as however tropical it'd still get cold at night.

On arrival I suppose I'd find the sexiest looking man and put my claim on him.

And as for skills, well I have an amazing sense of humour so could cheer everyone up. That or get my boobs out

If you could tell jokes which you laugh at WHILST getting your boobs out, I think we could fairly claim to have regained Paradise. "

I always laugh at my own jokes. Someone has to. And these boobs just slip out so easily.

Paradise found

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m pretty sure I’d kill myself as I despise tropical islands and hot weather in general

Oh, Cherry!

Show me on the doll whete Bora-Bora hurt you. "

I can show you on me, though that would entail uncovering my ample bosoms

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

I’ll be semi serious.

Swiss Army knife (other multi tools are available)

Muslin cloth

Rope

I would have a scout round

Build a shelter

Sunbathe

I can skin & prepare various animals

Not a bad shot with a bow & arrow

Pretty calm in a crisis

Can lead

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd take the big book of forum answers...there's always someone who knows the exact answer to any problem in it!

Oh, and don't forget the meat now feature....never know when I'll get hungry.

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"I’m pretty sure I’d kill myself as I despise tropical islands and hot weather in general

Oh, Cherry!

Show me on the doll whete Bora-Bora hurt you.

I can show you on me, though that would entail uncovering my ample bosoms

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"I’m pretty sure I’d kill myself as I despise tropical islands and hot weather in general

Oh, Cherry!

Show me on the doll whete Bora-Bora hurt you.

I can show you on me, though that would entail uncovering my ample bosoms

Oh no! This has gone horribly wron...

Wait a minute...

Do carry on.

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"I’ll be semi serious.

Swiss Army knife (other multi tools are available)

Muslin cloth

Rope

I would have a scout round

Build a shelter

Sunbathe

I can skin & prepare various animals

Not a bad shot with a bow & arrow

Pretty calm in a crisis

Can lead "

Blimey! Like a sexy Ray Mears! Thst's impressive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"1. Phone , sun cream because I’d burn to a crisp and toiletries because hygiene.

2. Panic

3. I can cook

Scottish people and sunshine is a cruel combination, I know. We'll build Casa El Shiv first, I promise, and with extra-shady palm leaves."

Thanks , I’ll just rock back and forth in there till we’ve been rescued

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"I’ll be semi serious.

Swiss Army knife (other multi tools are available)

Muslin cloth

Rope

I would have a scout round

Build a shelter

Sunbathe

I can skin & prepare various animals

Not a bad shot with a bow & arrow

Pretty calm in a crisis

Can lead

Blimey! Like a sexy Ray Mears! Thst's impressive."

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ll be semi serious.

Swiss Army knife (other multi tools are available)

Muslin cloth

Rope

I would have a scout round

Build a shelter

Sunbathe

I can skin & prepare various animals

Not a bad shot with a bow & arrow

Pretty calm in a crisis

Can lead

Blimey! Like a sexy Ray Mears! Thst's impressive.

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL"

I was in the navy, I still have the uniform that stopped fitting a long time ago

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"I’ll be semi serious.

Swiss Army knife (other multi tools are available)

Muslin cloth

Rope

I would have a scout round

Build a shelter

Sunbathe

I can skin & prepare various animals

Not a bad shot with a bow & arrow

Pretty calm in a crisis

Can lead

Blimey! Like a sexy Ray Mears! Thst's impressive.

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL

I was in the navy, I still have the uniform that stopped fitting a long time ago

Surely it’s worth trying on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ll be semi serious.

Swiss Army knife (other multi tools are available)

Muslin cloth

Rope

I would have a scout round

Build a shelter

Sunbathe

I can skin & prepare various animals

Not a bad shot with a bow & arrow

Pretty calm in a crisis

Can lead

Blimey! Like a sexy Ray Mears! Thst's impressive.

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL

I was in the navy, I still have the uniform that stopped fitting a long time ago

Surely it’s worth trying on

I can fit exactly one leg in the skirt

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"I’ll be semi serious.

Swiss Army knife (other multi tools are available)

Muslin cloth

Rope

I would have a scout round

Build a shelter

Sunbathe

I can skin & prepare various animals

Not a bad shot with a bow & arrow

Pretty calm in a crisis

Can lead

Blimey! Like a sexy Ray Mears! Thst's impressive.

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL

I was in the navy, I still have the uniform that stopped fitting a long time ago

Surely it’s worth trying on

I can fit exactly one leg in the skirt

And the shirt?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ll be semi serious.

Swiss Army knife (other multi tools are available)

Muslin cloth

Rope

I would have a scout round

Build a shelter

Sunbathe

I can skin & prepare various animals

Not a bad shot with a bow & arrow

Pretty calm in a crisis

Can lead

Blimey! Like a sexy Ray Mears! Thst's impressive.

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL

I was in the navy, I still have the uniform that stopped fitting a long time ago

Surely it’s worth trying on

I can fit exactly one leg in the skirt

And the shirt?"

One nipple

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"I’ll be semi serious.

Swiss Army knife (other multi tools are available)

Muslin cloth

Rope

I would have a scout round

Build a shelter

Sunbathe

I can skin & prepare various animals

Not a bad shot with a bow & arrow

Pretty calm in a crisis

Can lead

Blimey! Like a sexy Ray Mears! Thst's impressive.

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL

I was in the navy, I still have the uniform that stopped fitting a long time ago

Surely it’s worth trying on

I can fit exactly one leg in the skirt

And the shirt?

One nipple

That’s what I’m talking about

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"1. Phone , sun cream because I’d burn to a crisp and toiletries because hygiene.

2. Panic

3. I can cook

Scottish people and sunshine is a cruel combination, I know. We'll build Casa El Shiv first, I promise, and with extra-shady palm leaves.

Thanks , I’ll just rock back and forth in there till we’ve been rescued

Pretend the waterfall spray is drizzling rain, and the mosquitoes are midges. Add a bunch of effete Sassenachs mooching around whinging, and it will be just like home.

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL

I was in the navy, I still have the uniform that stopped fitting a long time ago

Surely it’s worth trying on

I can fit exactly one leg in the skirt

And the shirt?

One nipple

That’s what I’m talking about

I LOVE it when a plan comes together.

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL

I was in the navy, I still have the uniform that stopped fitting a long time ago

Surely it’s worth trying on

I can fit exactly one leg in the skirt

And the shirt?

One nipple

That’s what I’m talking about

I LOVE it when a plan comes together."

Wrong Hannibal for this expedition

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By *rtyIanMan
over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons

[Removed by poster at 21/12/22 22:09:13]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"1. Phone , sun cream because I’d burn to a crisp and toiletries because hygiene.

2. Panic

3. I can cook

Scottish people and sunshine is a cruel combination, I know. We'll build Casa El Shiv first, I promise, and with extra-shady palm leaves.

Thanks , I’ll just rock back and forth in there till we’ve been rescued

Pretend the waterfall spray is drizzling rain, and the mosquitoes are midges. Add a bunch of effete Sassenachs mooching around whinging, and it will be just like home.

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL

I was in the navy, I still have the uniform that stopped fitting a long time ago

Surely it’s worth trying on

I can fit exactly one leg in the skirt

And the shirt?

One nipple

That’s what I’m talking about

I LOVE it when a plan comes together.

Wrong Hannibal for this expedition

True, but YET AGAIN I forgot to pack the elephants.

Elephantisn't.

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By *rtyIanMan
over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons

I'll answer when home from the pub

But it will involve fire lighting kit, knives, water carrying kit even condoms

First to find

Water and shelter

Things I bring, hunt, kill, build shelter, make fire, cook anything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL

I was in the navy, I still have the uniform that stopped fitting a long time ago

Surely it’s worth trying on

I can fit exactly one leg in the skirt

And the shirt?

One nipple

That’s what I’m talking about

I LOVE it when a plan comes together."

Oh well, if I MUST

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"I'll answer when home from the pub

But it will involve fire lighting kit, knives, water carrying kit even condoms

First to find

Water and shelter

Things I bring, hunt, kill, build shelter, make fire, cook anything "

I love the fact that your quick temporary list beats most of our considered ones into a cocked hat! You and Misty are goimg to be indispensable.

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By *he AmbassadorMan
over a year ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara

Knife, axe twine/rope

Im a Ex scout/venture turned chef turned carpenter, Current first aider+Emergency Team leader,,

I got this with bells on it...

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

I was a scout leader

. I still have my uniform if there’s anyone interested - PMSL

I was in the navy, I still have the uniform that stopped fitting a long time ago

Surely it’s worth trying on

I can fit exactly one leg in the skirt

And the shirt?

One nipple

That’s what I’m talking about

I LOVE it when a plan comes together.

Oh well, if I MUST

Yes. You really really must

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1: What 3 portable items do you save from the wreck, and why?

2: What is the first thing you will do on arrival?

3: What will be your most valuable skills?

For me...

1) Proust, an ultra-sharp knife and sunblock, so I can finally get around to reading A La Recherche, shave and start fires, and not get skin cancer/horrendous burns.

2) Explore, I think, and make a map. I love drawing and walking.

3) I can build shelters, start fires,and cook...but probably listening will be the most useful skill for a long stay.

Over to you! I can't wait to learn all about your reactions in extremis.

How can you make a map with no pen and paper in your 3 items?

Bark and charcoal work well."

Was going to say on a cave wall in blood/berry juice. Hoping there will be berries

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

Was going to say on a cave wall in blood/berry juice. Hoping there will be berries

We are all berry optimistic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1 lingerie condoms and lub

2 find flat ground in the camp to set up a tent as my knocking shop

3 the hunter garthers will need sex dolls to play with after a hard day’s hunting I give a awesome bj and can take a pounding like a pro so best suited as the camp stress leaver

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By *orphia2003Woman
over a year ago

Tonypandy.

Leatherman, couple of cotton tablecloths, large roll of industrial strength bin bags. (101 uses for cotton and plastic)

I'd make shelter, near fresh water, build fire, search the island,

I'm ok at first aid and can stitch and dress a wound pretty well. I can kill, prep and cook food....and if you run out of food, there is enough meat on me to keep you going for a year.

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

Well seeing as there are plenty of Hunter gatherers…

I’m off to top up my tan. I didn’t pack a bikini so I guess there will be no tan lines

And if I think I need to be productive later I shall set up a volleyball team.

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By *he AmbassadorMan
over a year ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara

"Well seeing as there are plenty of Hunter gatherers…

I’m off to top up my tan. I didn’t pack a bikini so I guess there will be no tan lines

And if I think I need to be productive later I shall set up a volleyball team."
can i play??

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"Well seeing as there are plenty of Hunter gatherers…

I’m off to top up my tan. I didn’t pack a bikini so I guess there will be no tan lines

And if I think I need to be productive later I shall set up a volleyball team.can i play?? "

Volleyball? Of course

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"Leatherman, couple of cotton tablecloths, large roll of industrial strength bin bags. (101 uses for cotton and plastic)

I'd make shelter, near fresh water, build fire, search the island,

I'm ok at first aid and can stitch and dress a wound pretty well. I can kill, prep and cook food....and if you run out of food, there is enough meat on me to keep you going for a year.

Practically perfect in every way!

I KNEW Fabbers would do well here.

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By *he AmbassadorMan
over a year ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara

"Well seeing as there are plenty of Hunter gatherers…

I’m off to top up my tan. I didn’t pack a bikini so I guess there will be no tan lines

And if I think I need to be productive later I shall set up a volleyball team.can i play??

Volleyball? Of course

"
sweet,, i wont be long finishing off the pizza oven,,

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

Seems most of the practical stuff is covered

I might start walking up and down selling bits of tat - desert island looky looky woman

Or, pass laminated A4 cards around, stand awkwardly at all the sunbathers and sell massages

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"Well seeing as there are plenty of Hunter gatherers…

I’m off to top up my tan. I didn’t pack a bikini so I guess there will be no tan lines

And if I think I need to be productive later I shall set up a volleyball team.can i play??

Volleyball? Of course

sweet,, i wont be long finishing off the pizza oven,,

Ohhhhh niiice

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"Seems most of the practical stuff is covered

I might start walking up and down selling bits of tat - desert island looky looky woman

Or, pass laminated A4 cards around, stand awkwardly at all the sunbathers and sell massages "

I've had precisely one massage in my life. Where does one sign up?

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By *he AmbassadorMan
over a year ago

IRLANDA. / Prague. / Cil Dara

"Well seeing as there are plenty of Hunter gatherers…

I’m off to top up my tan. I didn’t pack a bikini so I guess there will be no tan lines

And if I think I need to be productive later I shall set up a volleyball team.can i play??

Volleyball? Of course

sweet,, i wont be long finishing off the pizza oven,,

Ohhhhh niiice"
well we need to get creative with all these dam pineapples,

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"Seems most of the practical stuff is covered

I might start walking up and down selling bits of tat - desert island looky looky woman

Or, pass laminated A4 cards around, stand awkwardly at all the sunbathers and sell massages

I've had precisely one massage in my life. Where does one sign up?"

You just decide on the spot really

My one beach massage experience left me with ptsd

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"Well seeing as there are plenty of Hunter gatherers…

I’m off to top up my tan. I didn’t pack a bikini so I guess there will be no tan lines

And if I think I need to be productive later I shall set up a volleyball team.can i play??

Volleyball? Of course

sweet,, i wont be long finishing off the pizza oven,,

Ohhhhh niiice well we need to get creative with all these dam pineapples,

I could set up a cock & pineapple ring hoopla competition?

I appear to have nominated myself as games coordinator

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

My one beach massage experience left me with ptsd

Was it on D day?

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

"Well seeing as there are plenty of Hunter gatherers…

I’m off to top up my tan. I didn’t pack a bikini so I guess there will be no tan lines

And if I think I need to be productive later I shall set up a volleyball team.can i play??

Volleyball? Of course

sweet,, i wont be long finishing off the pizza oven,,

Ohhhhh niiice well we need to get creative with all these dam pineapples,

I could set up a cock & pineapple ring hoopla competition?

I appear to have nominated myself as games coordinator

Beach rugby!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Straight to the bar

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

My one beach massage experience left me with ptsd

Was it on D day?"

How old do you think I am ?

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By *lephantis OP Man
over a year ago

Oxford

My one beach massage experience left me with ptsd

Was it on D day?

How old do you think I am ?

Like Cleopatra or the Mona Lisa, your beauty is eternal.

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

My one beach massage experience left me with ptsd

Was it on D day?

How old do you think I am ?

Like Cleopatra or the Mona Lisa, your beauty is eternal."

Thank you!

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"Well seeing as there are plenty of Hunter gatherers…

I’m off to top up my tan. I didn’t pack a bikini so I guess there will be no tan lines

And if I think I need to be productive later I shall set up a volleyball team.can i play??

Volleyball? Of course

sweet,, i wont be long finishing off the pizza oven,,

Ohhhhh niiice well we need to get creative with all these dam pineapples,

I could set up a cock & pineapple ring hoopla competition?

I appear to have nominated myself as games coordinator

Beach rugby!"

Yes!!!!! Oh yummy scrum(my)

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