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This week I’m looking for……..

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North

……….. a lady who can pull a Christmas cracker with her fanny lips please. She must also be able to make good gravy for our Christmas dinner too.

Now I’m not too bothered about your tits this week but I must insist that you’ve tidied up downstairs before I lick you for hours and hours for your Christmas treat

If this sounds like your cup of tea and you fit the bill then I’d love to hear from you so we can connect

Love and Peace

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can make proper gravy….. does the lumps bother you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can pull them with my ass cheeks if that counts

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"I can make proper gravy….. does the lumps bother you "

My gravy has lumps in it too

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"I can pull them with my ass cheeks if that counts "

Hhhhmmmm I don’t know as I wouldn’t know exactly where the crack came from when you pull the cracker

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

But I thought you were going to provide the gravy

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By *weetiepie99Woman
over a year ago

cardiff

I don't think my fanny lips are meaty enough to grab hold, and my bush is a bit bushy currently...is that ok?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can pull them with my ass cheeks if that counts

Hhhhmmmm I don’t know as I wouldn’t know exactly where the crack came from when you pull the cracker "

Ooo come on Rex don’t think I know give hafe a chance you blast the back doors off me before wipe a load on my face ha ha

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"But I thought you were going to provide the gravy "

It’s been a tough week, there’s not much to go around

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"I don't think my fanny lips are meaty enough to grab hold, and my bush is a bit bushy currently...is that ok? "

You can’t beat meaty pussy lips, I may have to pass on the lady garden though

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton


"But I thought you were going to provide the gravy

It’s been a tough week, there’s not much to go around "

Maybe I'll scrape it off the curtains

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"I can pull them with my ass cheeks if that counts

Hhhhmmmm I don’t know as I wouldn’t know exactly where the crack came from when you pull the cracker

Ooo come on Rex don’t think I know give hafe a chance you blast the back doors off me before wipe a load on my face ha ha "

I can hear my sleigh bells ringing

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"But I thought you were going to provide the gravy

It’s been a tough week, there’s not much to go around

Maybe I'll scrape it off the curtains "

A bit like OXO cubes then

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By *weetiepie99Woman
over a year ago

cardiff


"I don't think my fanny lips are meaty enough to grab hold, and my bush is a bit bushy currently...is that ok?

You can’t beat meaty pussy lips, I may have to pass on the lady garden though "

I don't blame you, i wouldn't either..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I can pull them with my ass cheeks if that counts

Hhhhmmmm I don’t know as I wouldn’t know exactly where the crack came from when you pull the cracker

Ooo come on Rex don’t think I know give hafe a chance you blast the back doors off me before wipe a load on my face ha ha

I can hear my sleigh bells ringing "

Ha ha

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Good sir! Thou hath inspired me!

I shall now go forth and direct a new porno flick featuring two sexy santa clad hot ladies pulling a cracker apart with only their hoo haa’s. It will be called, Cracker Sisters (a not so clever play on Scissor Sisters but hey - I’m only in it to make a fast buck after all) and will be available to download from various highly dubious and shady web sites

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"I don't think my fanny lips are meaty enough to grab hold, and my bush is a bit bushy currently...is that ok?

You can’t beat meaty pussy lips, I may have to pass on the lady garden though

I don't blame you, i wouldn't either.."

There’s always next week to look forward to

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"Good sir! Thou hath inspired me!

I shall now go forth and direct a new porno flick featuring two sexy santa clad hot ladies pulling a cracker apart with only their hoo haa’s. It will be called, Cracker Sisters (a not so clever play on Scissor Sisters but hey - I’m only in it to make a fast buck after all) and will be available to download from various highly dubious and shady web sites "

I think you should start a thread called ‘Which 2 forumites would you like to see’

Do it, do it, do it

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…


"Good sir! Thou hath inspired me!

I shall now go forth and direct a new porno flick featuring two sexy santa clad hot ladies pulling a cracker apart with only their hoo haa’s. It will be called, Cracker Sisters (a not so clever play on Scissor Sisters but hey - I’m only in it to make a fast buck after all) and will be available to download from various highly dubious and shady web sites

I think you should start a thread called ‘Which 2 forumites would you like to see’

Do it, do it, do it "

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"Good sir! Thou hath inspired me!

I shall now go forth and direct a new porno flick featuring two sexy santa clad hot ladies pulling a cracker apart with only their hoo haa’s. It will be called, Cracker Sisters (a not so clever play on Scissor Sisters but hey - I’m only in it to make a fast buck after all) and will be available to download from various highly dubious and shady web sites

I think you should start a thread called ‘Which 2 forumites would you like to see’

Do it, do it, do it

"

I’m waiting

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

Sorry I only know birds who can pull crackers with their arse cheeks. Sorry mate. Better luck next time.

The mr

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Small labia and I'm a shit cook. Looks like it's not my week to fuck Rex.

Maybe next week.

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"Sorry I only know birds who can pull crackers with their arse cheeks. Sorry mate. Better luck next time.

The mr "

You’ll keep a look out though won’t you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hopefully I'll have better luck next week. I failed on all your essential criteria this week.

NBVN x

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

Does 1 out of 2 count Rex?

My gravy is legendary. Northern birds love gravy

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"Small labia and I'm a shit cook. Looks like it's not my week to fuck Rex.

Maybe next week."

Maybe we could start the year with a bang next week

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lost me at "tidied up down there".

One week I'll get it.

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"Hopefully I'll have better luck next week. I failed on all your essential criteria this week.

NBVN x"

I’m certain you’ll meet my criteria one day

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"Does 1 out of 2 count Rex?

My gravy is legendary. Northern birds love gravy "

So you’ve got a bit of a Forrest Gump going on?

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By *ex Holes OP   Man
over a year ago

Up North


"Lost me at "tidied up down there".

One week I'll get it. "

Yes, you’ll get it

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke


"Does 1 out of 2 count Rex?

My gravy is legendary. Northern birds love gravy

So you’ve got a bit of a Forrest Gump going on? "

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