FabSwingers.com forum: We're going through....

By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago

Changes.

It will soon be the start of a new year (yeah, time flies quickly when you're my age). So, how have you changed in the past year? How have things changed for you? Are you happy with those changes, if any have happened?

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"Changes.

You're only 33. Wait until you're 50

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me it’s been fitness and weight loss. I started running during lockdown to help with my mental health. My company had us working from home and being in the house 24/7 wasn’t doing me any good. I’ve always been overweight but this last year I’ve started to see nice changed in my appearance so for the first time in my life I’m happy with how I look.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh Meli. Pull up a chair and let me tell you a tale of woe, regret and misery.

Of course I’ve changed from how I started this year, filled with sadness and found myself a little lost. And I’ve talked to enough people to have found very small inspirations from their conversations with me. I think if I’d have stayed where I was (not speaking or seeing anyone ) I’d have been a fully complete bitter/sad/negative man.

Instead I’ve come through, a little broken but appreciate so much more than what I once did. A year is a short and long time.

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By *inballs99Man
over a year ago

Blackheath

I had multiple organ failure 14-12-2021! So close to death,I spent 3 month's in hospital so for me I'm just happy to see another year!!!!

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By *affeine DuskMan
over a year ago

Caerphilly

...oh I'm gonna bookmark and get back to you in a week or so. I've not got to the self-reflection bit yet because it's been a fast year, hasn't it been so very fast?

Like last year was a bag of nothing and this year hasn't stopped, I wasn't ready for the evaluation!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've become a bigger person this year

4 kilos to be exact

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By *rolicUsCouple
over a year ago

Alluringly mysterious

"Changes.

Adore questions like these. I’m naturally reflective.

For the first year in ages I haven’t started or stopped a job and I can genuinely see myself staying with my challenging and interesting portfolio of jobs for a long while. I feel fulfilled and not burnt out.

And the biggie (smalls) is that we joined Fab this year, after many of discussing it. Not a decision taken lightly but it’s been a joy. A titillation. An exploration. And absolute fireworks. Delighted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ch,ch,ch,changes.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"...oh I'm gonna bookmark and get back to you in a week or so. I've not got to the self-reflection bit yet because it's been a fast year, hasn't it been so very fast?

Like last year was a bag of nothing and this year hasn't stopped, I wasn't ready for the evaluation!

I'm actually convinced that time speeds up the older you get.

I remember it taking eons for the school year to end and those six summer weeks lasted an eternity, filled with long sunny days of adventures.

These days I turn my back for 2 minutes and whilst I'm busy January sale shopping on the laptop some bastard has eaten the last Easter egg and is now tucking into one of many chocolate advent calendars. Blink and you've missed months.

Or did I dream it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...oh I'm gonna bookmark and get back to you in a week or so. I've not got to the self-reflection bit yet because it's been a fast year, hasn't it been so very fast?

Like last year was a bag of nothing and this year hasn't stopped, I wasn't ready for the evaluation!

Can I send you a perfect meme??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"...oh I'm gonna bookmark and get back to you in a week or so. I've not got to the self-reflection bit yet because it's been a fast year, hasn't it been so very fast?

Like last year was a bag of nothing and this year hasn't stopped, I wasn't ready for the evaluation!

I'm actually convinced that time speeds up the older you get.

I …….

Or did I dream it?

This is a fact. And it’s worth reading why. Your perception of time changes in your brain connections/activity as you age. That’s why kids can play out for 10 mins and think it’s ages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This has been one of my least favourite years. Nothing went particularly well for most of it from work to relationships, health to family. Things are much improved overall now so I'm optimistic that 2022 can be written off and forgotten about, and 2023 will be far better

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

I got out of a particularly shitty situation this year. I started the year barely existing at all, but I've rediscovered a lot of things in the second half and actually feel capable of joy again as we head towards the new year.

I like that I have refound self esteem, I get to spend my own hard earned money on me. I'm working hard on being more selfish, and trying to quiet that manic pixie dream girl people pleasing bollocks that runs in my veins.

There's still downs as well as ups, but feeling anything is better than the hollow shell I was at the start of this year. And hopefully I'll manage to get an actual therapist early in the coming year to help me process through the parts I can't alone and get myself back together properly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not normally one for reflection as I like to focus on the next week, or month even have a vague idea on what I'd like to achieve.

However, I think this has been important year for me. I feel more in tune with my hobbies in terms of understanding what I need to do to be better at them, I've changed jobs which will hopefully allow me to further my career, and my Fab life has been night and day compared to last year and although I still have parts of myself to work on, I feel like my confidence in new environments has grown exponentially which has helped in real life situations as well in terms of being more forward and talking to people rather than standing to one side

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By *lynJMan
over a year ago

Morden

"Changes.

You're only 33. Wait until you're 50

Or 65!

This year turned out to be sh*te.

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By *lynJMan
over a year ago

Morden

"Changes.

You're only 33. Wait until you're 50

Or 65!

This year turned out to be sh*te."

And I don't see next year being any better.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Relationship changes more so than anything.

Some have come and gone, others have stayed and got stronger.

The biggest self reflection was to realise that my BS meter needed a service, as it was a tad faulty.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Become single.

Embraced the enm community (2 forum socials and a club)

And will be mortgage free by the end of the month.

Bring on 2023

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By *eard and BoobsCouple
over a year ago

Portstewart

We’ve had some ups and some serious downs this year and tbh we are better for everything. Still some things to work on but we’re doing it together and talking a lot about our mental health. So we are hopeful that next year will continue to improve both ourselves individually and together as a couple.

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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago

Stirling

This year has had its ups and downs it’s been a year of reflection and new beginnings for me - I lost both my grandparents last October and the start of this year just felt flat and like a piece of me was missing..until I met someone in February who slowly gave me my sparkle back.

I recently got promoted in my new job which I started in January this year and will be commencing the new role in January 2023, after being put forward for the role by my manager.

I started teaching a new dance class a few months back and continue to grow my business and meet new people.

I have found joy and confidence to grab opportunities by the balls - despite missing two of the biggest characters that were in my life - it’s amazing what can happen when you allow the right people in.

Lastly but by no means least I found love - a love that slowly crept up on me and made me realise what it is to find someone who without force fused the broken bits of me back together and made me smile again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well well the last year has changed completely to me to start with I started this year as a mrs and I'm now a Mrs.

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By *assy69Man
over a year ago

West Sussex and Wales

"Changes.

The biggest change is a house move from south coast, to Wales. Still the same job (thank you covid for the push to home working). Think I am more relaxed now I am away from the madness of the south east of England!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it’s good to reflect on what’s happened over the past year.

There have definitely been a few changes and adjustments to how I go about this life.

I’ve got rid of the negatives and made positives, it’s amazing how talking can help you see things clearer. I’m in a much better place than I’ve ever been

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

This has been the worst year of my life so things can only get better. I've had two broken shoulders a perforated bowl. Took an overdose at Christmas and then lost my partner. So things have definetly got to change for me

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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago

"For me it’s been fitness and weight loss. I started running during lockdown to help with my mental health. My company had us working from home and being in the house 24/7 wasn’t doing me any good. I’ve always been overweight but this last year I’ve started to see nice changed in my appearance so for the first time in my life I’m happy with how I look. "

Oh that's fantastic to read, in a not patronising way, well done.

Did the running during lockdown help with your mental health? Feeling better in how you look makes such a difference doesn't it? My legs are becoming muscular, I've even got a clavicle coming out and I'm oddly proud of how my body is changing.

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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago

"Oh Meli. Pull up a chair and let me tell you a tale of woe, regret and misery.

Instead I’ve come through, a little broken but appreciate so much more than what I once did. A year is a short and long time.

That last sentence is particularly poignant Woody. x

I think sometimes when you're a little broken you're far more aware of what there is in the world. A renewed appreciation for life. I hope you keep finding that inspiration and yourself.

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By *arkandlovelyWoman
over a year ago

South Derbyshire

[Removed by poster at 13/12/22 10:47:03]

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By *arkandlovelyWoman
over a year ago

South Derbyshire

This has been a transformational year for me.

Last year I was fresh out of a very damaging relationship and subsequent divorce, wondering how the hell I was going to cope bringing up a toddler on my own and having lost all sense of who I was.

This year I began to blossom as I've thrown off that blanket of trauma, grew in confidence, realised I'm not doing too badly with all this motherhood lark and become capable in ways I never knew I was able to. I've got a toolbox now, for god's sake

I'm finishing the year within touching distance of getting a really shithot degree and having accepted a really exciting job offer in a field I've wanted to be in forever.

For possibly the first time in my life, I can see tiny green sprouts of self-belief and excitement for the future.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just wanna say it's so nice so many of you have had a year of blooming! Even I, sarcastic and let's face it, a bit of a dickhead, had a smile reading them. Go you lot!

I don't think about time much, I'm very much a one day at a time live in the moment person which means I rarely stress ever which is nice for me. But honestly it's been a fairly standard year with no major events! Think one of the biggest things is joining here and meeting you kinky lot!

Please insert 'eww' 'cringe' and 'pass the sick bags' here!

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Gone freelance after being in various offices since I left school. Much prefer it.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

"I think it’s good to reflect on what’s happened over the past year.

There have definitely been a few changes and adjustments to how I go about this life.

I’ve got rid of the negatives and made positives, it’s amazing how talking can help you see things clearer. I’m in a much better place than I’ve ever been

It is amazing how talking can help piece together bits of a far bigger puzzle.

Getting ris of negatives and making room for the positives is certainly an area of growth I could be better at!

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

I am becoming more of a recluse, disconnecting more and more from things, barely paying attention to any form of media outside of Spotify. Life is peaceful, gentle almost. I don’t struggle anymore, but to get to that point I have made sacrifices.

My ambition for the new year is to have a picture on my profile of me hanging out the back of someone else, like all the cool people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This year has had its ups and downs it’s been a year of reflection and new beginnings for me - I lost both my grandparents last October and the start of this year just felt flat and like a piece of me was missing..until I met someone in February who slowly gave me my sparkle back.

I recently got promoted in my new job which I started in January this year and will be commencing the new role in January 2023, after being put forward for the role by my manager.

I started teaching a new dance class a few months back and continue to grow my business and meet new people.

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

This year has been interesting to say the least. It's been beyond challenging involved far more suicide attempts, medical interventions, support and counselling than I'd have liked. Non of that was fun. Being diagnosed with Autism last December was a shock, an employer refusing any support or reasonable adjustments and treating it as a capability issue was the sucker punch I really didn't expect and has defined this year

So yeah there's been a lot of shit this year!

But I'm ending it in a good place, in a new job where I'm liked, valued and respected and surrounded by an ever increasing number of supportive friends. Rock-bottom has been replaced with my mental health being the best it's been in years and i understand abd accept who i am far more than i ever have before. And I'm physically in the best shape I've ever been which is pretty cool and a big plus.

I don't normally cate about new year bit will be glad to see the back of 2022 and am looking forward to 2023 being pretty special, I've a lot to make up for

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

I wrote "2023" for the first time yesterday.

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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago

"Changes.

Adore questions like these. I’m naturally reflective.

Ah Frolic you can read your sheer joy when describing your year so far. Finding that fulfillment can take time but it really sounds like you're there. I hope fab keeps bringing you those fireworks, x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could waffle on. Is there a word limit?

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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago

"I'm not normally one for reflection as I like to focus on the next week, or month even have a vague idea on what I'd like to achieve.

You really have grown in confidence FH, it's been fantastic to watch you grow and change and be more comfortable in yourself.

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

I've become more Grumpy thats about it

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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago

"I got out of a particularly shitty situation this year. I started the year barely existing at all, but I've rediscovered a lot of things in the second half and actually feel capable of joy again as we head towards the new year.

Yes, fuck that manic pixie archetype - it really doesn't serve us at all. And people pleasing! Eurgh. The amount of times I'd say "hey don't worry about it" or "it's fine, I was being silly". You'll find that the more your self esteem grows, the more you can please yourself.

Keep feeling and finding that joy, life is too short to not experience it. x

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By *uke OzadeMan
over a year ago

Ho Chi Minge City

I’ve done loads of improvements on my house so it’s starting to look like the stereotypical country cottage that it’s meant to be and built a bar in the garden. Also went to Cape Town for the first time, plus Mexico, Dominican Republic and Italy which were all great fun. Enjoyed it all so much I’m heading back to Cape Town for some mid winter sun early January. Think I’ll keep the momentum going next year and carry on living life in the best way I can

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve read all of these thread contributions and wow, so much love to you all. There’s a lot of triumph over adversity here and I love it. Keep swimming

Great thread, Meli x

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

Not much has changed to be honest, this year has been like many others.

I've had some lovely times though but also heartbreak and dissapointment but life goes on and can do it all again next year

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By *rettyflamingoWoman
over a year ago

Where the flamboyance of flamingos live

I’ve actually learnt that I’m stronger than I thought . I’ve also said goodbye to some old ghosts and they no longer cause me trauma.

Lets hope 2023 is a good one for everyone

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

"Changes.

You're only 33. Wait until you're 50

Exactly, hopefully it's an easy ride

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xX6u3bhR6AU

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Nothing positive has changed the way I assumed but lockdown changed everything hopefully 2023 it's a new chapter onwards and upwards and same goes for everyone else

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

This year hasn't been a bad year, much better than last year.

I came of my antidepressants, fingers crossed I will be signed off from the hospital for a long term issue on the 16th. My level hearing loss hasn't changed from my last test last year and the tinnitus hasn't got any worse

I got a promotion at work to a management position with more pay.

The only thing missing is a good woman to curl up to on these cold nights, but, who knows what next year will bring.

I finally got round to starting my Shibari rope classes which I am loving

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

It’s been a good year for me. What seemed like an impossible situation with no end became resolved. Sometimes you just have to keep doing the right thing and not lose hope. You can’t control everything.

Other than that not much has changed this year as above consumed me. Made a few rings , took a few photos, been to three continents, gone deeper with a few people and met a few new ones, same as usual. I think next year bring a few suprises though.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I finally got round to starting my Shibari rope classes which I am loving"

You must do an update thread sometime! I never got beyond single column ties

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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago

I recently got promoted in my new job which I started in January this year and will be commencing the new role in January 2023, after being put forward for the role by my manager.

I started teaching a new dance class a few months back and continue to grow my business and meet new people.

I hope the two of you are very happy - reading your posts and the ever growing love is heartwarming. That piece of yours you didn't know was missing is something to be treasured. x

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

I finally got round to starting my Shibari rope classes which I am loving

You must do an update thread sometime! I never got beyond single column ties

"
I have just ordered a mannaquin so I can do more practice at home, when I don't have a bunny to tie

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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago

"This year has been interesting to say the least. It's been beyond challenging involved far more suicide attempts, medical interventions, support and counselling than I'd have liked. Non of that was fun. Being diagnosed with Autism last December was a shock, an employer refusing any support or reasonable adjustments and treating it as a capability issue was the sucker punch I really didn't expect and has defined this year

So yeah there's been a lot of shit this year!

I don't normally cate about new year bit will be glad to see the back of 2022 and am looking forward to 2023 being pretty special, I've a lot to make up for"

You do John, I have every faith you'll do just that! I'm glad the year is ending in a far better place for you, x

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

New relationships have found me, old relationships have been reconnected and I've spent a perfect amount of quality time with my social friends.

Next year is a whole smorgasbord of change, so rest is prescribed atm before I become a kite dancing in a hurricane again

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I'm not sure I've changed but a lot has changed for me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh Meli. Pull up a chair and let me tell you a tale of woe, regret and misery.

Instead I’ve come through, a little broken but appreciate so much more than what I once did. A year is a short and long time.

That last sentence is particularly poignant Woody. x

I think sometimes when you're a little broken you're far more aware of what there is in the world. A renewed appreciation for life. I hope you keep finding that inspiration and yourself."

I do kind of understand when someone once said, I needed to break to fix myself stronger (not wishing to sound too melodramatic). Because you do, you feel you can’t be challenged like you once was and you can now deal with everything. It’s helps to know your not perfect. … just awesome will do.

Thanks Meli.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It was the best.

Then it was the worst.

Now it's just meh.

I hate new year.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It was the best.

Then it was the worst.

Now it's just meh.

I hate new year. "

What do you call this new poem of yours?

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

Going into the new year as a married couple. So that's nice

LvM

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By *agerMorganMan
over a year ago

Canvey Island

I fought and overcame major anxiety, now just working on keeping it under control.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Going into the new year as a married couple. So that's nice

LvM"

Snap.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Going into the new year as a married couple. So that's nice

LvM"

Did you 2 get married??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Started the year in love, ending the year with a broken heart x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Started the year in love, ending the year with a broken heart x"

I'm sorry

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By *inkyInkedBiWoman
over a year ago

"Changes.

I lost a lot of friends. I was fed up of being a people pleaser, forever worrying about others when they didn’t care one bit about me.

I stepped back. I stopped being the one always getting in touch, and found that I got nothing back.

When you’re low people turn the other way. They preach about keeping in touch, saying how you feel, tell me if you’re going through a tough time. But it’s all for show.

It was upsetting to know I meant so little to those I considered friends. But hey ho, at least I knew where I stood.

It’s been a lonely old year. Nothing new there of course. I’ve had fun on here, I’ve made friends on here. I’ve been let down a hell of a lot.

I do question wether it’s the right place for me.

I’ve mentioned and probably overshared it enough that I’m widowed.

It’s coming up on ten years. I love the fun I have on here, but I’d love something more. To mean something to someone. To not be just a shag.

But I’ve lost hope of that, I lost it a long time ago.

Time of year doesn’t help being on your own.

I can’t sit and type this without sobbing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Started the year in love, ending the year with a broken heart x

I'm sorry

Thank you so much, I shall pull up my big girl pants soon and move on, just not quite yet x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The end of this year is the worse ever period I've ever been in!

If 2023 don't improve then im fucked lol

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By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

"...oh I'm gonna bookmark and get back to you in a week or so. I've not got to the self-reflection bit yet because it's been a fast year, hasn't it been so very fast?

Like last year was a bag of nothing and this year hasn't stopped, I wasn't ready for the evaluation!

I'm actually convinced that time speeds up the older you get.

I remember it taking eons for the school year to end and those six summer weeks lasted an eternity, filled with long sunny days of adventures.

Or did I dream it?

When you're 5 a year is a fifth of your life, when you're 50 a year is a fiftieth of your life.

A fiftieth is smaller than a fifth, so it goes quicker.

Science innit.......

Winston

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

This yeah has been one of the worst for me

I lost someone very close to me to suicide just before Christmas and I still cry most days. I experienced really debilitating health issues in the summer and then I was unfortunately made redundant in the autumn.

I’m looking forward to the start of a new year. I feel that I’m starting to come through the other side of my grief and might be eventually ready to think about meeting someone. But I’m going to focus on spending the first few months of the year looking after myself and getting my sparkle back

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By *amantha_JadeWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

"Changes.

I lost a lot of friends. I was fed up of being a people pleaser, forever worrying about others when they didn’t care one bit about me.

I stepped back. I stopped being the one always getting in touch, and found that I got nothing back.

When you’re low people turn the other way. They preach about keeping in touch, saying how you feel, tell me if you’re going through a tough time. But it’s all for show.

It was upsetting to know I meant so little to those I considered friends. But hey ho, at least I knew where I stood.

It’s been a lonely old year. Nothing new there of course. I’ve had fun on here, I’ve made friends on here. I’ve been let down a hell of a lot.

I do question wether it’s the right place for me.

I’ve mentioned and probably overshared it enough that I’m widowed.

It’s coming up on ten years. I love the fun I have on here, but I’d love something more. To mean something to someone. To not be just a shag.

But I’ve lost hope of that, I lost it a long time ago.

Time of year doesn’t help being on your own.

I can’t sit and type this without sobbing.

Sending hugs

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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago

"I lost a lot of friends. I was fed up of being a people pleaser, forever worrying about others when they didn’t care one bit about me.

I stepped back. I stopped being the one always getting in touch, and found that I got nothing back.

When you’re low people turn the other way. They preach about keeping in touch, saying how you feel, tell me if you’re going through a tough time. But it’s all for show.

It was upsetting to know I meant so little to those I considered friends. But hey ho, at least I knew where I stood.

It’s been a lonely old year. Nothing new there of course. I’ve had fun on here, I’ve made friends on here. I’ve been let down a hell of a lot.

I do question wether it’s the right place for me.

I’ve mentioned and probably overshared it enough that I’m widowed.

It’s coming up on ten years. I love the fun I have on here, but I’d love something more. To mean something to someone. To not be just a shag.

But I’ve lost hope of that, I lost it a long time ago.

Time of year doesn’t help being on your own.

I can’t sit and type this without sobbing.

Hey.

It's not surprising you're sobbing typing that, you've really had a difficult year. I'm not going to patronise you; finding out friends don't care is really fucking crap. Being let down is going to add to the crap feeling and make you doubt yourself and your worth even more.

You're not alone though. This isn't really like actual human interaction, no one can pretend it is. But this little screen of words - behind that are people who care. You mean something. More than you can see right now.

I hope in the new year you're able to form real friendships with people who value you and remind you they do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This yeah has been one of the worst for me

Sorry to hear about your loss, sounds like you've had a rough time recently but I'm glad you're thinking about healing time for yourself

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

"Changes.

I lost a lot of friends. I was fed up of being a people pleaser, forever worrying about others when they didn’t care one bit about me.

I stepped back. I stopped being the one always getting in touch, and found that I got nothing back.

When you’re low people turn the other way. They preach about keeping in touch, saying how you feel, tell me if you’re going through a tough time. But it’s all for show.

It was upsetting to know I meant so little to those I considered friends. But hey ho, at least I knew where I stood.

It’s been a lonely old year. Nothing new there of course. I’ve had fun on here, I’ve made friends on here. I’ve been let down a hell of a lot.

I do question wether it’s the right place for me.

I’ve mentioned and probably overshared it enough that I’m widowed.

It’s coming up on ten years. I love the fun I have on here, but I’d love something more. To mean something to someone. To not be just a shag.

But I’ve lost hope of that, I lost it a long time ago.

Time of year doesn’t help being on your own.

I can’t sit and type this without sobbing.

I was going to write please don’t lose hope, but what does that even mean from a stranger on the internet who hardly knows anything about you?

Instead I’ll say that even when you’ve lost hope, good things can still happen. I just wish I could tell you when so it wouldn’t hurt so much.

Take care of yourself x

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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago

"Started the year in love, ending the year with a broken heart x"

Sorry to read this Queen, that's really tough. I hope you're extra kind to yourself and give yourself the time to heal xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly the last couple of years have been tough in a number of ways. 2022 didn't improve any.

So I've been developing hobbies that I can focus on at home - primarily improving my film knowledge by watching classics and genres I'd not watched much before, while also trying to read more new fiction and classics.

My aim for 2023 is to get myself out and see friends more, maybe try to find some groups to join to meet new people.

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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago

"This has been a transformational year for me.

Last year I was fresh out of a very damaging relationship and subsequent divorce, wondering how the hell I was going to cope bringing up a toddler on my own and having lost all sense of who I was.

I'm finishing the year within touching distance of getting a really shithot degree and having accepted a really exciting job offer in a field I've wanted to be in forever.

For possibly the first time in my life, I can see tiny green sprouts of self-belief and excitement for the future."

Oh this is fantastic! It's lovely to read how transformative a year it's been for you; I hope you pass your degree with flying colours and continue embracing life and blossoming x

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By *entlemanFoxMan
over a year ago

North East / London

"This has been a transformational year for me.

Last year I was fresh out of a very damaging relationship and subsequent divorce."

Same for me this year. Life is infinitely better.

I just want to say thanks to all the fab forumites. Without this secret escape from the toxicity, I am not sure I would have managed to break free.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This year has been challenging in quite a few ways with certain aspects of uncertainty and unrest rolling over into next year.

One huge plus of this year is finally settling into a job that I am thoroughly enjoying, working for a charity.

I've been strong and dealt with problems face on instead of running away from them, which I spent previous years recklessly doing. I have taken positive pro active steps when I knew things weren't right for for me.

The major plus of the year is I'm heading to the end of the year with all my loved ones still around me, my husband and children that are my world and my extended family, and that we all have our health. That is all that truly matters in my life to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This year has been challenging in quite a few ways with certain aspects of uncertainty and unrest rolling over into next year.

One huge plus of this year is finally settling into a job that I am thoroughly enjoying, working for a charity.

I remember your conundrum about whether to take that new job - pleased it has worked out for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm not normally one for reflection as I like to focus on the next week, or month even have a vague idea on what I'd like to achieve.

You really have grown in confidence FH, it's been fantastic to watch you grow and change and be more comfortable in yourself.

Really appreciate that, here's hoping it can continue into 2023 and beyond!

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By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

This year........ not without its challenges.

Went into it, totally and utterley empty. Lost and broken.

Came out of it full, healing and smiling.

This time of year is always a challenge. This year I'm not alone.

Good thread.

Some sadness and inspiration.

People are fucking awesome.

Winston

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This year has been challenging in quite a few ways with certain aspects of uncertainty and unrest rolling over into next year.

One huge plus of this year is finally settling into a job that I am thoroughly enjoying, working for a charity.

I remember your conundrum about whether to take that new job - pleased it has worked out for you.

That one didn't

So I moved again. Everything happens for a reason. Thank you for your wishes though

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

I'm not very good at reflecting. This year hasn't involved any major changes for me, and I know I'm lucky in very many ways. But if I do take time to reflect, I am probably in a bit of a funk/rut, so maybe 2023 will be the year for change...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've gained so much confidence and independence over the last 12 months. I'd say I am the best I've ever been in that sense.

But I've also had a lot of things impact me negatively. And now my brother. I don't think I'll ever heal from that. I feel like he has taken a part of me with him I'm not sure I'll ever get back. I was content enough and accepting of everything a few weeks ago, but ever since him, I feel broken.

I'm trying to focus on the positives. But it's hard.

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

It’s been a rollercoaster! Was so optimistic after a turbulent 2021, then, it was a rocky start this year (could write a book on teen angst)!!

Last few months have been a breeze though and I’m looking forward to 2023 - I think!

In terms of self reflection, you’re never too old to learn and have your mettle tested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've gained so much confidence and independence over the last 12 months. I'd say I am the best I've ever been in that sense.

I'm trying to focus on the positives. But it's hard.

It changes you. Its not about recovering or getting back. The only way past suffering is through syffering. You will be a different person but also the same. You'll be okay. It's just a different flavour of okay.

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

Have I changed hugely? Not sure. I have been changing gradually but intentionally for a few years now.

The main change for me this year was meeting a FWB back in the summer who is incredibly smart and challenges me to be a better version of me, but is also a huge cheerleader and really celebrates my achievements.

It's one of the best relationships I've had when it comes to personal development and I'm very glad to have him in my corner!

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By *elaninMaverickWoman
over a year ago

near Putney Heath

"Changes.

I hate change...or rather my brain hates change. It sort of triggers me into survival mode instead of living mode.

Oh well I've lost count of the changes I've been through this year not all of them pleasant.

Top two positives this year were to start going to swinging/nudist clubs and completing 18 months of intensive therapy.

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