FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

The perfect Christmas Turkey

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Should be a biggun' to start with, and then you get a block of butter (I use anchor as it's the most flavoursome) and mix it up with a packet of dried cranberries. Then you get a tablespoon and carefully slip it between the skin and the flesh of the bird to create a pocket, and then squeeze the butter/cranberry mix in the gap and gently massage it so that the whole bird is covered.

Stuffing: only stuff the neck of the bird but if you must put some in the cavity only put an inch thick layer in the bottom. If you fill the whole cavity you'll a) have shit loads of stuffing to wade through when it's cooked, and b) increase the solidity and weight of the whole thing and have to increase the cooking times by a couple of hours.

Body cavity: Slice a couple of clementines in half and shove them in the body along with a few sprigs of fresh rosemary (the smell is really Christmassy)

Season the whole thing with salt and pepper and then arrange strips of smoked bacon over the top of the turkey before wrapping it up in foil (but leave a gap for the air to flow around it.)

Cook according to the guidelines for the weight and remove the bacon halfway through and eat it cos it's fookin gorgeous.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *exki11enWoman
over a year ago

Bristol

You forgot to say cover it in tea towels and leave to rest for 2 hours once it's cooked.

You'll never have a dry bird that way.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Should be a biggun' to start with, and then you get a block of butter (I use anchor as it's the most flavoursome) and mix it up with a packet of dried cranberries. Then you get a tablespoon and carefully slip it between the skin and the flesh of the bird to create a pocket, and then squeeze the butter/cranberry mix in the gap and gently massage it so that the whole bird is covered.

Stuffing: only stuff the neck of the bird but if you must put some in the cavity only put an inch thick layer in the bottom. If you fill the whole cavity you'll a) have shit loads of stuffing to wade through when it's cooked, and b) increase the solidity and weight of the whole thing and have to increase the cooking times by a couple of hours.

Body cavity: Slice a couple of clementines in half and shove them in the body along with a few sprigs of fresh rosemary (the smell is really Christmassy)

Season the whole thing with salt and pepper and then arrange strips of smoked bacon over the top of the turkey before wrapping it up in foil (but leave a gap for the air to flow around it.)

Cook according to the guidelines for the weight and remove the bacon halfway through and eat it cos it's fookin gorgeous.

"

Wow sounds delicious

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You forgot to say cover it in tea towels and leave to rest for 2 hours once it's cooked.

You'll never have a dry bird that way. "

Ours will be history 2 hours after it's cooked.

They're like fookin' locusts in our house

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Bloody hell wishy you always turn into nigella at this time of year

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

And your trimmings? Not forgetting the sprouts. A lovely buttery sprout is a joy at this time of year.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham


"And your trimmings? Not forgetting the sprouts. A lovely buttery sprout is a joy at this time of year."

Mmmmm with bacon lardons and chestnuts!!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Don't forget to rest it for as long as you have cooked it for... the bird will be right juicy then...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When it comes to Turkey, you will NEVER go wrong cooking it the Delia way

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always prepare my bird the night before

Use the same method butter wise under the skin.

But I always cooks in a roasting bag and the night before it gets an orange and an onion shoved up it

Keeps the moisture in and adds to flavour

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"When it comes to Turkey, you will NEVER go wrong cooking it the Delia way

"

Ohh get you...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can't beat a juicy bird

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

After the fun and frolics of the weekend, I win the biggest turkey prize

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston


"You can't beat a juicy bird "

you can if she's kinky that way

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ollie_JCouple
over a year ago

London

Do it the Gordon way, prep above and heat at 220 for 10 then take the bird out cover with streaky then back in at normal temp

That way you get a brown and not anaemic breast if you use bacon

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"You forgot to say cover it in tea towels and leave to rest for 2 hours once it's cooked.

You'll never have a dry bird that way. "

Correct. Forgot that part. Also, before cooking allow the bird to come up to room temperature as that also helps to keep it nice n juicy.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"And your trimmings? Not forgetting the sprouts. A lovely buttery sprout is a joy at this time of year."

I'll cook sprouts for whoever wants them but not a tiny morsel of the little devil's fartballs will pass my lips. I usually boil them, drain them, lob a couple of knobs of butter over them until it melts, toss them and then drizzle fried cripsy bacon bits over the top. I've heard that you can coat them in double cream but the thought of it makes me wanna hurl.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"After the fun and frolics of the weekend, I win the biggest turkey prize "

I quite fancy the idea of shoving a couple of clementines up your jacksie then trussing you all up ready for debasing ... um.. basting.. I meant basting.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Right butter 14 pound bird real butter and all over the bird ... inside oranges and lemons Cut in half pepper all over . I do stuffing on its own. Them beacon all over it .... and foil will take about 4 hours a free range bird longer just a normal one .4.40 MINS. take foil off hour before it comes out and some of the juices start to baste it with half juices and maybe take half out for gravy.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You can't beat a juicy bird

you can if she's kinky that way "

Do ya know any

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston


"You can't beat a juicy bird

you can if she's kinky that way

Do ya know any "

maybe....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You can't beat a juicy bird

you can if she's kinky that way

Do ya know any

maybe.... "

Mental note made

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you have to rest the bird for a hour out the oven before you eat. xx with foil over or tea towel x ovens free for other things xx

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like to put lemons between the skin and flesh while cooking then remove before serving.

I wrap it up tightly in tinfoil and pop it in the oven the night before christmas on a very low heat then take it out the tin foil for 10 min to brown an hour before we have dinner.

Meat just falls of the bone then and real juicy slurpppppppppp

Oh and I always soak the turkey in white wine for 24 hours before cooking.

Stuffing and bacon and pigs in blankets go without saying

I think it's just how you like it, there is no perfect way.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ngel Devil69Couple
over a year ago

Manilva

Stuff the turkey. Rather have duck or goose

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Stuff the turkey. Rather have duck or goose "
never stuff turkey only neck .. as would take longer in oven and not nice x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ngel Devil69Couple
over a year ago

Manilva


"Stuff the turkey. Rather have duck or goose never stuff turkey only neck .. as would take longer in oven and not nice x"

Wouldn't know about turkey? Stuffing can go a little soggy in duck or goose though

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Stuff the turkey. Rather have duck or goose never stuff turkey only neck .. as would take longer in oven and not nice x

Wouldn't know about turkey? Stuffing can go a little soggy in duck or goose though "
ok tomorrow i will give the best stuffing xx its so easy paxo and sausage meat egg .. and not done i bird ..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top