FabSwingers.com forum: Nora’s secret service F&B edition

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Have you got something you're dying to say?

Too shy to mail your crush?

Want to apologise because you’ve cheated at a game chess with anal beads in your ass ?

Just wanna pay someone a compliment Or try to get your cock in her/his ass?

Maybe you have some words of wisdom for everyone?

Send me your message and I'll post it here

I will not post any horrible messages and any messages asking “who said it” will be deleted.

Your secrets are safe with me and my Excel sheet.

I promise I will not add anything weird to the original message.

However, they will be REAL messages and FAKE ones, your job is to find out which one is real, which one is fake.

No one will be left behind !

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

This is always bizarre and fun. In.

Mrs m

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Could you tell Stud-u-like that I’d love to park in his Southend-on-sea’s hole of wonder x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do your worst F&B

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell to MistyPeaks that I’d like us to make a promise

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

Let's go, F&B, let's go!

IN.

Mrs TMN x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Could you tell TheCoupleAfterDark that her damp canal of lust may need my expertise to check if my turgescent member makes her release my magic toothpaste of love x

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By *ittle-Miss-Cunty-1Woman
over a year ago

Your basement, Cuntsville

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell RedForDanger that her soft mounds reminds me that I love milk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In for the laughs

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By *rtyIanMan
over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

This again? I’m cautiously in.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell Melrose that her fart factory smells better than Brussels sprouts.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell RedforDanger that she has some of the sexiest pics on Facebook. From what I can see of her face she looks very like Rebecca Ferguson. Beautiful.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell Twist my nipples that every time I think about her pleasure pearl, my mouth is watering while my penis releases some liquified pleasure

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell Little-Miss-Cunty-1 that her caviar star looks way better than the one belonging to Little-Miss-Cunty-0

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Could you tell SweetCherry that I’d love to use my gun and shoot my WD-40 (penetrating white creamy oil) in her rusty bullet hole x

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By *B69Woman
over a year ago

Wiltshire

I’m in

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm out

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Message for ArtyIan :

I’d love to eat your meat pipe even if I am a vegetarian

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Could you tell TheCoupleAfterDark that her damp canal of lust may need my expertise to check if my turgescent member makes her release my magic toothpaste of love x"

Wow how poetic and moving. It’s more moist than damp though but I think it’ll still do the job.

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By *ecky and justCouple
over a year ago

Godalming

We’re in

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Message for Rose-tinted Glasses:

Someone told me that your prostate-stabbing sword of love is available Sunday evening ! Is that true ?

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

I'm in, let's see what happens

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

wildblonde69 I’d love to feast on your dearest bodily flower

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Message for lornajo83: your rolling eyes make me want to park my puppy pecker in your cock garage.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh go on then. In

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Message for _ecky and just:

Just’s serpentine member locked into Becky’s libidinously slurping cakehole of love makes me want to be heterosexual

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"Oh go on then. In

Oh, what a gorgeous lady

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

"Someone told me that your prostate-stabbing sword of love is available Sunday evening ! Is that true ? "

*narrows eyes*

Available for what, exactly?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Agent Coulson You have the best muscle of love aka your gaying instrument I have ever laid my eyes on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Could you tell SweetCherry that I’d love to use my gun and shoot my WD-40 (penetrating white creamy oil) in her rusty bullet hole x "

I’m pretty sure I know from who this message came from

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Please tell Little Miss Cunty 1 that the riding crop between her legs makes me feel neeeeeeeiiiiigh - never mind

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Please tell Little Miss Cunty 1 that the riding crop between her legs makes me feel neeeeeeeiiiiigh - never mind "

It was supposed to be an emoji not saying never mind. The copy and past function doesn’t work for emoji apparently

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Please tell Little Miss Cunty 1 that the riding crop between her legs makes me feel neeeeeeeiiiiigh - never mind

It was supposed to be an emoji not saying never mind. The copy and past function doesn’t work for emoji apparently "

Not actually it was written never mind

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Can you tell ArtyIan, I’d be his soapy loofah of love

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell Mellrose to keep smiling. It suits her.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Please tell TheCoupleAfterDark that ‘moist’ is a weirdly creepy word. ‘Moist’. Eww.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

MissDreavus Your purple deep cave would looks good on my white chocolate vein cane.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Someone told me that your prostate-stabbing sword of love is available Sunday evening ! Is that true ?

*narrows eyes*

Available for what, exactly?

Apparently for butt sex from what I could gather

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Fife Ninja One day I’ll manage to get your kelp bunny in my moist jungle x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh fuck forgot to say in but don't let that mean I did the next post

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

I’m in

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"Fife Ninja One day I’ll manage to get your kelp bunny in my moist jungle x"

My kind of lady

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell Clacton65 that his penile flora could scratch my itchy snatch

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Please tell the couple after dark that I would stay with them until daylight and make them the best breakfast pancakes on account of having at least 5 condoms put on oneself

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell miss dreavus she has incredibly attractive face

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell Littlebird that her smile makes my enormous manly cunt-slicer-upper hard

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By *ecky and justCouple
over a year ago

Godalming

"Message for _ecky and just:

Just’s serpentine member locked into Becky’s libidinously slurping cakehole of love makes me want to be heterosexual "

Oooh.. libidinously… naughty, wanton love cakehole..!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Mr32 You have the thickest oak tree in the forest of fab dickland x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Could you tell SweetCherry that I’d love to use my gun and shoot my WD-40 (penetrating white creamy oil) in her rusty bullet hole x

I’m pretty sure I know from who this message came from

I can’t tell sorry that is the rule

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Could you tell SweetCherry that I’d love to use my gun and shoot my WD-40 (penetrating white creamy oil) in her rusty bullet hole x

I’m pretty sure I know from who this message came from

I can’t tell sorry that is the rule "

Probably the only one I respect to be fair

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Also I'm being such a SLUT but can you tell redfordanger if she's gonna fab my pics can she at least tell me she wants to blow raspberries on my bellybutton thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Mr32 You have the thickest oak tree in the forest of fab dickland x"

I don't usually cry but...

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By *X2019Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

In for a bit

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair

I'm not often, but this time I'll be in.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Please tell TheCoupleAfterDark that ‘moist’ is a weirdly creepy word. ‘Moist’. Eww."

Moist is a fantastic word and I’ll hear no more about it.

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By *ittle-Miss-Cunty-1Woman
over a year ago

Your basement, Cuntsville

"Please tell Little Miss Cunty 1 that the riding crop between her legs makes me feel neeeeeeeiiiiigh - never mind

It was supposed to be an emoji not saying never mind. The copy and past function doesn’t work for emoji apparently

Not actually it was written never mind

So this one must be real

I can ride you like a horse and use the crop

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan
over a year ago

Glasgow / London

"Moist is a fantastic word and I’ll hear no more about it."

You stick to your guns. Don’t take that kind of negativity.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

To Fabulous and Bearded:

I'd love for you to lick my piles while you suck on an ice cube.

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"Tell to MistyPeaks that I’d like us to make a promise "

Hahaha

The fakest of fakes.

I love this thread

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By *ittle-Miss-Cunty-1Woman
over a year ago

Your basement, Cuntsville

"Please tell TheCoupleAfterDark that ‘moist’ is a weirdly creepy word. ‘Moist’. Eww.

Moist is a fantastic word and I’ll hear no more about it."

100% agree!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Also I'm being such a SLUT but can you tell redfordanger if she's gonna fab my pics can she at least tell me she wants to blow raspberries on my bellybutton thanks

You should know this without me having to say, you sexy beast (or something more ambiguous, gender wise)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell DX2019 that I’d to lick on his uncut pleasure popsicle

Signed Nora.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tell Mellrose to keep smiling. It suits her."

No one can see my smile

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

NeroLondon Your Batmobile can explore my bat cave

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

"Tell to MistyPeaks that I’d like us to make a promise

Hahaha

The fakest of fakes.

I love this thread

There are no fakes here girlfriend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Please tell the couple after dark that I would stay with them until daylight and make them the best breakfast pancakes on account of having at least 5 condoms put on oneself"

I don’t like pancakes can I have a bacon roll instead please.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

A love story is unfolding before our eyes :

Hey. Mind passing on the following message to redfordanger

Just seen your profile for the first time I think, and love all your pics. Red happens to be my favourite colour so interested to see what danger we can come up with if you still need "helping" into next week

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

"Tell Littlebird that her smile makes my enormous manly cunt-slicer-upper hard "

Ooh… I’m honoured

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Tell to MistyPeaks that I’d like us to make a promise

Hahaha

The fakest of fakes.

I love this thread

There are no fakes here girlfriend

See ! Stop thinking the worst of me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A love story is unfolding before our eyes :

Hey. Mind passing on the following message to redfordanger

Swoon. And I probably will

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell Rex Holes that his thick straw can scratch my red holes.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Can you tell Red for danger that I’d like to insert one of her nipples down my japs eye please

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Can you tell redfordanger I would collect all the doves in the world for the chance to have a 69 belly button raspberries session with her, and to please not worry about the birds causing havoc in the room because it was intended to be romantic

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By *istyPeaksCouple
over a year ago

braintree

"Tell to MistyPeaks that I’d like us to make a promise

Hahaha

The fakest of fakes.

I love this thread

There are no fakes here girlfriend

See ! Stop thinking the worst of me

Now I’m confused

Naked and confused

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair

"NeroLondon Your Batmobile can explore my bat cave "

I have a Batmobile??

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Tell to MistyPeaks that I’d like us to make a promise

Hahaha

The fakest of fakes.

I love this thread

There are no fakes here girlfriend

See ! Stop thinking the worst of me

Now I’m confused

Naked and confused"

It is called being nonplussed by F&B

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

"Agent Coulson You have the best muscle of love aka your gaying instrument I have ever laid my eyes on. "
unexpected, but thank you

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"NeroLondon Your Batmobile can explore my bat cave

I have a Batmobile??

Apparently this person thinks so it was referring to the dark aura of that beautiful penis of yours.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Rex Holes:

You can jab my pleasure palace(s) with your silent flute all day…

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Can you tell Nero that I’d love to restring my guitar with his ball sac pubes and play a tune for him please

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell LittleBird that:

I would like to 'nail' her to the bedroom door!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Can you tell Nero that his utter beauty, and great shoes really do make me very moist indeed

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By *heGigglersCouple
over a year ago

Stourbridge

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By *ittlebirdWoman
over a year ago

The Big Smoke

"Tell LittleBird that:

I would like to 'nail' her to the bedroom door! "

Oh my! Now you’re talking

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

"Rex Holes:

You can jab my pleasure palace(s) with your silent flute all day…"

If only

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

"Tell Rex Holes that his thick straw can scratch my red holes. "

Can I see your Biffins please

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By *X2019Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

"A love story is unfolding before our eyes :

Hey. Mind passing on the following message to redfordanger

Swoon. And I probably will

Always happy to help lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ooh I'll join in

NBVN x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell TheGigglers that my all-beef thermometer would love to take the temperature of her Hershey highway

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Could you tell SweetCherry that I’d love to use my gun and shoot my WD-40 (penetrating white creamy oil) in her rusty bullet hole x

I’m pretty sure I know from who this message came from

I can’t tell sorry that is the rule

Probably the only one I respect to be fair

Not asking! I know who it was

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell Nice_But_Very_Naughty_HW that her velvet orifice makes my dick unleashes my nature’s Alfredo sauce

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Could you tell SweetCherry that I’d love to use my gun and shoot my WD-40 (penetrating white creamy oil) in her rusty bullet hole x

I’m pretty sure I know from who this message came from

I can’t tell sorry that is the rule

Probably the only one I respect to be fair

Not asking! I know who it was

All I can tell, is that someone from this thread

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ok lets do this

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

F&B, your correspondents have a beautiful way with words. And you copy and paste delightfully

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"F&B, your correspondents have a beautiful way with words. And you copy and paste delightfully

It is all ppl on fab you know.

Are you in by the way ?

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By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford

Always in for these. No-one's penetrated my urethra for hours, so have at it.

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"F&B, your correspondents have a beautiful way with words. And you copy and paste delightfully

It is all ppl on fab you know.

Are you in by the way ? "

Of course. I do enjoy being in

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell growly old git that he can growl in my poop cavern on Tuesday night if he likes

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Elephantis Aside having the most delicate yet manly urethra from Oxford, your winking portal could do with my man baguette in it !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tell miss dreavus she has incredibly attractive face"

Oh, this is good news

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"MissDreavus Your purple deep cave would looks good on my white chocolate vein cane. "

How deep is purple? And is that vein cane made of actual chocolate?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Rickshawed I heard that your bearded clam is soft as velvet and makes every Pinocchio’s noses that came in contact with it, deliver a lot of tadpole yogurt

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hi! Could you tell F&B I want yo use his anus as a plant pot please!?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hi! Could you tell F&B I want yo use his anus as a plant pot please!?

anytime

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Can you tell Mrs RickAstley that I’d love to read her bumhole braille with my erect bobbies helmet please

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"MissDreavus Your purple deep cave would looks good on my white chocolate vein cane.

How deep is purple? And is that vein cane made of actual chocolate? "

Light purple that person said.

Nope but who cares as long as you get laid

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By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford

"Elephantis Aside having the most delicate yet manly urethra from Oxford, your winking portal could do with my man baguette in it ! "

If I've heard this once,I've heard it a single time.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Could you tell Elephantis that he really is my Tristan and I hope to be his Isolde very soon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Could you tell SweetCherry that I’d love to use my gun and shoot my WD-40 (penetrating white creamy oil) in her rusty bullet hole x

I’m pretty sure I know from who this message came from

I can’t tell sorry that is the rule

Probably the only one I respect to be fair

Not asking! I know who it was

All I can tell, is that someone from this thread "

I’m sure it is , you cheeky little one

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By *heGigglersCouple
over a year ago

Stourbridge

"Tell TheGigglers that my all-beef thermometer would love to take the temperature of her Hershey highway "

Wow, that sounds 98.6°F hot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tell Nice_But_Very_Naughty_HW that her velvet orifice makes my dick unleashes my nature’s Alfredo sauce "

Oh phwoar

NBVN x

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"Rickshawed I heard that your bearded clam is soft as velvet and makes every Pinocchio’s noses that came in contact with it, deliver a lot of tadpole yogurt "

Yeah? What flavour yogurt? I like to know what I'm putting in my mouth

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By *lephantisMan
over a year ago

Oxford

"Could you tell Elephantis that he really is my Tristan and I hope to be his Isolde very soon "

If my tod must come very soon, let it indeed be a Liebestod.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Could you tell SweetCherry that I’d love to use my gun and shoot my WD-40 (penetrating white creamy oil) in her rusty bullet hole x

I’m pretty sure I know from who this message came from

I can’t tell sorry that is the rule

Probably the only one I respect to be fair

Not asking! I know who it was

All I can tell, is that someone from this thread

I’m sure it is , you cheeky little one

I am not that little though

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"Can you tell Mrs RickAstley that I’d love to read her bumhole braille with my erect bobbies helmet please "

I'll comb the tangles out first so you don't get the wrong message

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Rickshawed I heard that your bearded clam is soft as velvet and makes every Pinocchio’s noses that came in contact with it, deliver a lot of tadpole yogurt

Yeah? What flavour yogurt? I like to know what I'm putting in my mouth

That person told me that it would tadpole flavoury

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

I’m in and yes lovely please

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Could you tell SweetCherry that I’d love to use my gun and shoot my WD-40 (penetrating white creamy oil) in her rusty bullet hole x

I’m pretty sure I know from who this message came from

I can’t tell sorry that is the rule

Probably the only one I respect to be fair

Not asking! I know who it was

All I can tell, is that someone from this thread

I’m sure it is , you cheeky little one

I am not that little though

Lol, meaning you are a youngster

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell Forbidden east that the first day I saw him around the forums my chamber of secret supplied a lot of hot princely milk that can be drank without fearing being d*unk

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Fab and bearded if carlsberg did vaginas it woule be his butthole and there would be a nationwide shortage, it would be like Beatles mania only in 2022.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Could you tell SweetCherry that I’d love to use my gun and shoot my WD-40 (penetrating white creamy oil) in her rusty bullet hole x

I’m pretty sure I know from who this message came from

I can’t tell sorry that is the rule

Probably the only one I respect to be fair

Not asking! I know who it was

All I can tell, is that someone from this thread

I’m sure it is , you cheeky little one

I am not that little though

Lol, meaning you are a youngster

With the dick of 79 years old

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

We're in

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With the dick of 79 years old "

That actually makes sense

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

With the dick of 79 years old

That actually makes sense "

you meanie

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My crush is why I returned

She ignores me though

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

With the dick of 79 years old

That actually makes sense

you meanie "

One of my many charms

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *dventurousCharmerMan
over a year ago

Kilsby

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

could you tell KnightsoftheCoffeeTable that he can pound my chocolate starfish with his thick fishing rod on Monday. Cause I have Pilates on Tuesday.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

DontYuckMyYum Your cock is straight as justice x

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By *r_BlueEyesMan
over a year ago

Manchester

I'm in

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *dventurousCharmerMan
over a year ago

Kilsby

"DontYuckMyYum Your cock is straight as justice x "

Okay this is pretty great

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

"could you tell KnightsoftheCoffeeTable that he can pound my chocolate starfish with his thick fishing rod on Monday. Cause I have Pilates on Tuesday. "

Sorry can’t do Monday, that’s then only day I can get my weekly colonic arrogation treatment, can fit you in Wednesday.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Could you tell Mr_BlueEyes that i would love to see his engorged and pulsating manly member destroying a few backdoors in Hull.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"could you tell KnightsoftheCoffeeTable that he can pound my chocolate starfish with his thick fishing rod on Monday. Cause I have Pilates on Tuesday.

Sorry can’t do Monday, that’s then only day I can get my weekly colonic arrogation treatment, can fit you in Wednesday. "

That person told me that on Wednesday she has her singing session with Céline.

Thursday midday?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell the lurkers that I know they are perving on my nipples through the shadow, nothing is more troublesome than incertitude dudes x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb. "

Someone confused my profile with a hotty's

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb.

Someone confused my profile with a hotty's"

No she said it was yours x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair

"Can you tell Nero that I’d love to restring my guitar with his ball sac pubes and play a tune for him please "

That sounds most acceptable, with the proviso that he/she uses a plectrum to play an 'infamy symphony'.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair

"Can you tell Nero that his utter beauty, and great shoes really do make me very moist indeed "

They're styled in Italy by Quinny-Quiver™. But thank you for the 'cumpliment'.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *r_BlueEyesMan
over a year ago

Manchester

"Could you tell Mr_BlueEyes that i would love to see his engorged and pulsating manly member destroying a few backdoors in Hull. "

Only with permission from the backdoor owners of course

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Can you please tell Nice_But_Very_Naughty_HW:

Your candy-striped legs require licking from top-to-bottom, from your inner thigh to make you go 'sigh'.

1 minute aGo

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ixedDevilMan
over a year ago

Bootyville

Can I play? I’m late

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb.

Someone confused my profile with a hotty's

No she said it was yours x"

She's confused

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell MixedDevil that is :

..............…………………………._¸„„„„_

…………………….…………...„--~*'¯…….'\

………….…………………… („-~~--„¸_….,/ì'Ì

…….…………………….¸„-^"¯ : : : : :¸-¯"¯/'

……………………¸„„-^"¯ : : : : : : : '\¸„„,-"

**¯¯¯'^^~-„„„----~^*'"¯ : : : : : : : : : :¸-"

.:.:.:.:.„-^" : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : :„-"

:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.: : : : : : : : : : ¸„-^¯

.::.:.:.:.:.:.:.:. : : : : : : : ¸„„-^¯

:.' : : '\ : : : : : : : ;¸„„-~"

:.:.:: :"-„""***/*'ì¸'¯

:.': : : : :"-„ : : :"\

.:.:.: : : : :" : : : : \,

:.: : : : : : : : : : : : 'Ì

: : : : : : :, : : : : : :/

"-„_::::_„-*__„„~"

Is pure lust to gaze at

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb.

Someone confused my profile with a hotty's

No she said it was yours x

She's confused "

I am just the postie.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In for a humour boost.

Nell

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell NellyWho that my ninja growing rod would like to enter her hairy snack shack as soon sa possible

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb.

Someone confused my profile with a hotty's

No she said it was yours x

She's confused

I am just the postie. "

Thank you anyway

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ixedDevilMan
over a year ago

Bootyville

"Tell MixedDevil that is :

..............…………………………._¸„„„„_

…………………….…………...„--~*'¯…….'\

………….…………………… („-~~--„¸_….,/ì'Ì

…….…………………….¸„-^"¯ : : : : :¸-¯"¯/'

……………………¸„„-^"¯ : : : : : : : '\¸„„,-"

**¯¯¯'^^~-„„„----~^*'"¯ : : : : : : : : : :¸-"

.:.:.:.:.„-^" : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : :„-"

:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.: : : : : : : : : : ¸„-^¯

.::.:.:.:.:.:.:.:. : : : : : : : ¸„„-^¯

:.' : : '\ : : : : : : : ;¸„„-~"

:.:.:: :"-„""***/*'ì¸'¯

:.': : : : :"-„ : : :"\

.:.:.: : : : :" : : : : \,

:.: : : : : : : : : : : : 'Ì

: : : : : : :, : : : : : :/

"-„_::::_„-*__„„~"

Is pure lust to gaze at "

Very creative

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb.

Someone confused my profile with a hotty's

No she said it was yours x

She's confused

I am just the postie.

Thank you anyway "

Free of charge x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Could you tell Mr_BlueEyes that i would love to see his engorged and pulsating manly member destroying a few backdoors in Hull.

Only with permission from the backdoor owners of course"

Do we have to go to Hull for this?

* asking for a friend

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb.

Someone confused my profile with a hotty's

No she said it was yours x

She's confused

I am just the postie.

Thank you anyway

Free of charge x"

I'm hiding the knickers to save future confusion

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb.

Someone confused my profile with a hotty's

No she said it was yours x

She's confused

I am just the postie.

Thank you anyway

Free of charge x

I'm hiding the knickers to save future confusion "

She sends her regards x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb.

Someone confused my profile with a hotty's

No she said it was yours x

She's confused

I am just the postie.

Thank you anyway

Free of charge x

I'm hiding the knickers to save future confusion

She sends her regards x"

Send her mine

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb.

Someone confused my profile with a hotty's

No she said it was yours x

She's confused

I am just the postie.

Thank you anyway

Free of charge x

I'm hiding the knickers to save future confusion

She sends her regards x

Send her mine "

She told me that she is actually reading the thread

(closed, thread got too big)

Reply privately

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Wonko You have the best knickers of Scotland

Wb.

Someone confused my profile with a hotty's

No she said it was yours x

She's confused

I am just the postie.

Thank you anyway

Free of charge x

I'm hiding the knickers to save future confusion

She sends her regards x

Send her mine

She told me that she is actually reading the thread "

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

"could you tell KnightsoftheCoffeeTable that he can pound my chocolate starfish with his thick fishing rod on Monday. Cause I have Pilates on Tuesday.

Sorry can’t do Monday, that’s then only day I can get my weekly colonic arrogation treatment, can fit you in Wednesday.

That person told me that on Wednesday she has her singing session with Céline.

Thursday midday? "

This is turning into a nightmare, once again sorry I’m busy, that’s the day I eat pizza and stare at people through the gym window.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell red for danger if I got all them damn crows for nothing (or whatever bird it was) I'm gonna cry on Phil Mitchell and tell him I have nothing left

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*waves to the mystery message sender*

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tell red for danger if I got all them damn crows for nothing (or whatever bird it was) I'm gonna cry on Phil Mitchell and tell him I have nothing left"

We’ll get covered in bird faeces!

It’s a no from me

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can you please tell Nice_But_Very_Naughty_HW:

Your candy-striped legs require licking from top-to-bottom, from your inner thigh to make you go 'sigh'.

1 minute aGo"

Let's do this

NBVN x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

SIGH PLEASE tell redfordanger that the room has a four poster bed and so it'll be like having sex in a tent in rainfall. Only it's bird shit. And that the noises will drown out my hideous groans of ecstacy that I only do when my bellybutton is played with.

Ultimately assure her everything has been thought out to make it a magical once in a lifetime experience please MERCI

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"SIGH PLEASE tell redfordanger that the room has a four poster bed and so it'll be like having sex in a tent in rainfall. Only it's bird shit. And that the noises will drown out my hideous groans of ecstacy that I only do when my bellybutton is played with.

Ultimately assure her everything has been thought out to make it a magical once in a lifetime experience please MERCI"

Will there be wine?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Tell redfordanger there will be wine, grapes, a platter of cheese, pop tarts, pot noodles, and crows. Alot of crows.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Tell redfordanger there will be wine, grapes, a platter of cheese, pop tarts, pot noodles, and crows. Alot of crows."

No merci this time ?

So rude

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tell redfordanger there will be wine, grapes, a platter of cheese, pop tarts, pot noodles, and crows. Alot of crows.

No merci this time ?

So rude

That is definitely you, F&B, I smell a fake

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Guess I'll never know who the secret message was

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

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