FabSwingers.com forum: Big yourself up

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Right Ladies&Gents it's time to sell yourself so to speak

Why should people meet you?

I will start

Me I'm friendly ,OK looking,easy to get along with, ,great company and if nothing else I will atleast make you smile

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As yoda said

Try not

Do or do not

There is no try

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have boobs and a vagina.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *MisschiefxTV/TS
over a year ago

London

Because I need someone to offer as a sacrifice to the pagan gods so they bless us with a mild winter.

It'll be fun, you get a white dress and a crown of flowers.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

Fat ugly smelly and skint I’m hoping for the sympathy vote/shag

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

We are fantastic company, enjoy having a laugh and when it’s comes to sex, we’ll do everything to blow your mind

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been told I have a "magnificent cock". Oh and I'm pretty good at oral

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They shouldn’t. I’m a pain in the arse

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rtyIanMan
over a year ago

Gateway to the Beacons

I love to give pleasure and told im good at it, i could cook you anything and take pics for you

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because I'm a delight

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

Not a fucking clue I'm just me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

Because above all else, we’re really nice people!! I know this sounds a bit wet but I’m comfortable with it

Oh yeah…. I’ll ride you like Seabiscuit

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rsmith21zMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

I'm easy going and up for banter

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

I have a load of computer parts ready for system assembly and can impress you with my benchmarking skills.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ose and her beastCouple
over a year ago

Watford

Fun entertaining more than just sex xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They shouldn’t. I’m a pain in the arse "

Aye but you're funny with it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Soooo

I'm a good cook

I'm actually quite funny

I have nice eyes, nice toes, good teeth

I'm decent in bed

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *allMeLexMan
over a year ago

Southampton

OK looking, kinky, funny, dominant, experienced, successful and haven't failed to make a woman squirt yet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Alright here goes you asked for it!

Firstly, the pictures. I mean c'mon. Even most of the lads are like, ooh that looks like a delightful body. Guess I wouldn't mind seeing that on my wife/gf thrashing away like a sealion on acid.

Then there's the face. Some of you have seen it, you know its not bad!

Next up, chat? Golly do I need to say anything on this now? I actually do have an off switch too so don't worry I'm only annoying like this in the forums. And I can sext like a god damn pro.

So you get all of that, plus a finely groomed shnack of a penis and laughter. Shit now I wanna meet up with myself...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Soooo

I'm a good cook

I'm actually quite funny

I have nice eyes, nice toes, good teeth

I'm decent in bed

Nice toes? Evidence needed!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hubbycheckerMan
over a year ago

Porstmouth

I can reverse park 1st time haha

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Alright here goes you asked for it!

Firstly, the pictures. I mean c'mon. Even most of the lads are like, ooh that looks like a delightful body. Guess I wouldn't mind seeing that on my wife/gf thrashing away like a sealion on acid.

Then there's the face. Some of you have seen it, you know its not bad!

Next up, chat? Golly do I need to say anything on this now? I actually do have an off switch too so don't worry I'm only annoying like this in the forums. And I can sext like a god damn pro.

So you get all of that, plus a finely groomed shnack of a penis and laughter. Shit now I wanna meet up with myself..."

Sold

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Soooo

I'm a good cook

I'm actually quite funny

I have nice eyes, nice toes, good teeth

I'm decent in bed

Nice toes? Evidence needed!"

OK ??

I'll send proof to your inbox

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Between us we can burp the national anthem.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tbh probly shouldnt im more addictive than sugar and that could be a dangerous its a bunch of massive uncontrollable highs with risky side effects most common of which is a lifetime of insanity

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Because we have good cop bad cop down to a tee!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ull English with teaMan
over a year ago

London

I’ll treat you to a slap up ruby at the Bengal Palace, unlimited popadoms included….

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We think we're fun, non-pushy couple who just like added fun.

And we have a great sense of humour.... we think!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

"Because I'm a delight

Afternoon?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *s2pervsCouple
over a year ago

Truro

...because we're alright really. X

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Hi, I'm Tina Titz and I come with jelly babies

And that doesn't at all sound like a very specific and wrong fetish.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *atsswallowsMan
over a year ago

dudley

If nothing else you are gonna have a laugh, that is more important than anything

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because I’m just fabulous and suck like a hoover.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because I’m just fabulous and suck like a hoover.

"
dyson alert awoooooga awoooooooga

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I fart in bed

I have small cock

I have personality

I am fun to be with

To kinky for some

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Blue eyed brunette eager to please

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Blue eyed brunette eager to please

x "
bring me a hot water bottle and your tits pleas3

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a sense of humour

I have huge boobs

A smackable arse

Not bad looking

And I drive a nice car with bum warming seats...

What more you need

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im hilarious! So if you’re ever in the mood to just laugh I’m great at that!

I forget whose round it is so I’ll probably just buy all of the drinks! So people would save a lot of money there.

I also actually wear clothes when I’m outside. Shocking I know. But it happens

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ldbutrandyMan
over a year ago

West Midlands

Because if I start something I always........

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can count up to 12

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *weetiepie99Woman
over a year ago

cardiff

I know how to properly escape from a stampede of cows in a field

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ldbutrandyMan
over a year ago

West Midlands

"I know how to properly escape from a stampede of cows in a field"

I have to ask !

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *MisschiefxTV/TS
over a year ago

London

"I know how to properly escape from a stampede of cows in a field"

Have your slower friend wear red?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because I’m just fabulous and suck like a hoover.

Will have to put that to the test...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

I shower at least twice a year and on at least one of those occasions I get out of the shower to pee.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

Nothing I say should convince you.

Meet me in the clubs, test drive the goods, then decide if it was worth it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

I’m funny, good kisser and would take you out for steak

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because I’m just fabulous and suck like a hoover.

Why not just use the hoover?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

"Because I’m just fabulous and suck like a hoover.

Why not just use the hoover?"

A hoover doesn't have a tongue that licks your balls when you push your cock all the way in.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *weetiepie99Woman
over a year ago

cardiff

"I know how to properly escape from a stampede of cows in a field

I have to ask !"

You don't want to know

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Little bit sarcastic

Good sense of humour

And if you don’t know how to use a condom , no worries I can put one on using my mouth

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uietly_KinkyMan
over a year ago

High Wycombe

Don't. Run away.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will make you laugh and have a nice dog.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ornucopiaMan
over a year ago

Bexley

'Big yourself up'

I'm big when I'm up you!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

"They shouldn’t. I’m a pain in the arse "

Haha. Me too

I’ll break your vagina and then your heart - best avoid.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aiseiMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

I’m vaguely tolerable in person.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

"I will make you laugh and have a nice dog. "

I have a nice dog too

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hagTonightMan
over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

I am a fun guy with a 6pack and with the love of the haribos, my favorite haribos are the gummy bears

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hav02Man
over a year ago

Glasgow/London

Let's meet in Paris

because that's how i roll

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *lark_KentMan
over a year ago

Northampton

I can make a nice cup of tea and have lots of buiscuits. What more could someone ask for

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have boobs and a vagina."

I'm in

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *humper.Man
over a year ago

northumberland/scotland

"Little bit sarcastic

Good sense of humour

And if you don’t know how to use a condom , no worries I can put one on using my mouth

SOLD!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *humper.Man
over a year ago

northumberland/scotland

I'll sort out your houseplants while I'm there and give you a quote for decorating.

Other than that, really wouldn't bother

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They shouldn’t. I’m a pain in the arse

Haha. Me too

I’ll break your vagina and then your heart - best avoid."

My brother from another mother

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Little bit sarcastic

Good sense of humour

And if you don’t know how to use a condom , no worries I can put one on using my mouth

Can you put 70 condoms on me please?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *humper.Man
over a year ago

northumberland/scotland

"Little bit sarcastic

Good sense of humour

And if you don’t know how to use a condom , no worries I can put one on using my mouth

Can you put 70 condoms on me please?"

Oooshya. Is it still THAT itchy?

(That's for not letting me have a biscuit!)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Little bit sarcastic

Good sense of humour

And if you don’t know how to use a condom , no worries I can put one on using my mouth

Can you put 70 condoms on me please?

Oooshya. Is it still THAT itchy?

(That's for not letting me have a biscuit!)"

Dont be a hater for a man appreciating safe sex. And I'm gonna need those biscuits, I imagine 70 condoms is gonna take some time. You're welcome to a biscuit break too Mrs after dark

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *humper.Man
over a year ago

northumberland/scotland

"Little bit sarcastic

Good sense of humour

And if you don’t know how to use a condom , no worries I can put one on using my mouth

Can you put 70 condoms on me please?

Oooshya. Is it still THAT itchy?

(That's for not letting me have a biscuit!)

Dont be a hater for a man appreciating safe sex. And I'm gonna need those biscuits, I imagine 70 condoms is gonna take some time. You're welcome to a biscuit break too Mrs after dark "

What's a guy gotta do for a fuckin biscuit round here?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inda May SimmonsTV/TS
over a year ago

hexham

You want me to sell myself?

Big myself up?

Oh crumbs!

But I cannot meet the demand as it is ! No, no, no….

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Little bit sarcastic

Good sense of humour

And if you don’t know how to use a condom , no worries I can put one on using my mouth

Can you put 70 condoms on me please?

Oooshya. Is it still THAT itchy?

(That's for not letting me have a biscuit!)

Dont be a hater for a man appreciating safe sex. And I'm gonna need those biscuits, I imagine 70 condoms is gonna take some time. You're welcome to a biscuit break too Mrs after dark "

Not sure my jaw could handle 70 but I’ll take a biscuit if your offering

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *enrietteandSamCouple
over a year ago

Staffordshire

We’re great company, we love a cocktail or ten and we can really daaance

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Little bit sarcastic

Good sense of humour

And if you don’t know how to use a condom , no worries I can put one on using my mouth

Can you put 70 condoms on me please?

Oooshya. Is it still THAT itchy?

(That's for not letting me have a biscuit!)

Dont be a hater for a man appreciating safe sex. And I'm gonna need those biscuits, I imagine 70 condoms is gonna take some time. You're welcome to a biscuit break too Mrs after dark

Not sure my jaw could handle 70 but I’ll take a biscuit if your offering

Look I'm more than happy to negotiate. 3, sex, biscuits. Final offer!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Little bit sarcastic

Good sense of humour

And if you don’t know how to use a condom , no worries I can put one on using my mouth

Can you put 70 condoms on me please?

Oooshya. Is it still THAT itchy?

(That's for not letting me have a biscuit!)

Dont be a hater for a man appreciating safe sex. And I'm gonna need those biscuits, I imagine 70 condoms is gonna take some time. You're welcome to a biscuit break too Mrs after dark

What's a guy gotta do for a fuckin biscuit round here?

Think of it this way, the biscuits are gonna ruin your abs the ladies are oh so crazy about.

I hate you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m funny, good kisser and would take you out for steak

"
steak

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

I smell nice

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island

Be original everyone else says no.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a handsome penis

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I'm a bit of a nutter. Hard work. Honestly the tight grip of my vagina on your cock/okayish oral skills might just make it worth it. But I'm not sure.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"I'm a bit of a nutter. Hard work. Honestly the tight grip of my vagina on your cock/okayish oral skills might just make it worth it. But I'm not sure."

Winner

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm the kind of woman you bring home to meet your dog. You'll forget me quickly, but my smell will linger on your beard for 67 days. I'm absolutely divine and I feel like cobwebs.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm the kind of woman you bring home to meet your dog. You'll forget me quickly, but my smell will linger on your beard for 67 days. I'm absolutely divine and I feel like cobwebs."

I walk through cobwebs every day when I leave my house going through the gate and I can never get enough of it.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Easy going, friendly and respectful

If you are looking to dip your toes in for the first time or you've done it before, never any pressure… Go at your own pace and let’s make it a night to remember…

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *orny Harry6999Man
over a year ago

Kendal

I'm slim active and been told I have a lush arse to grab hold of

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ustincider888Man
over a year ago

Preston Ish

Stay clear, I'm shit in the sack anyway

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

I’m all heart

and I’m an amazing listener and I give fantastic hugs.

I’m pretty amazing at kissing as well

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a fucking delight

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *igBobby82Man
over a year ago

Hartlepool

I'm a genuine, funny, kind hearted guy with a talented tongue and powerful hands.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've got a good sense of humour, and previous girlfriends have never complained about my oral enthusiasm

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire

i dont know anything that im not good at..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

You probably shouldn't, I can be quite hard work.

But if yiu do, I'm more than a little handy with a flogger

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *entBarryUKMan
over a year ago

Ashford

I'm terrible at this, so, I am a fungi, a bit of a rebel, I like to get into truffle. I know it might be spore taste, but I also like dark, warm, wet places.

And I hate mushrooms.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Grace of a flamingo, legs of a flamingo, face .... like a flamingo

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inkyInkedBiWoman
over a year ago

You’ll have a laugh with me and can motorboat my tits

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I cook All the Time I clean I’m house trained I lift toilet seat when lady’s in house

I wash dry clothing I iron even though I hate it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm a hip lady who can hip hop, bee bop, dance till you drop, and yo yo make a wicked cup of cocoa

NBVN x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *nterblueMan
over a year ago

manchester

I'm an absolute powerhouse of a man. A thrilling, action packed juggernaut that can take you to sensual heights beyond your wildest imagination.

I also have a good imagination.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *igBobby82Man
over a year ago

Hartlepool

[Removed by poster at 16/11/22 19:09:51]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *igBobby82Man
over a year ago

Hartlepool

"You’ll have a laugh with me and can motorboat my tits

Haha. Clap clap clap

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread