FabSwingers.com forum: Are you happy

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Are you happy with how your life has been so far? Obviously nobody has a fairtytaio, and life is full of surprises, but what are you grateful for? * Positivity & respectfulness*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had quite a hectic life... been street homeless and an addict many times. Always moved around the UK living and working in pubs, hotels etc. I've literally had just the clothes I was wearing at times. I've never been totally happy with my life and where I was. But now I am 99.9% happy with my life. Yeah I'm sort of homeless but I love it. Plus my new tent arrived today so I'm very happy. My 4th tent since April 2019. I'll be off again soon.

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

Omg you've made me think about my life........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes and no. But I’m a libra, so that’s to be expected

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By *espacito56Man
over a year ago

Orkney

Not sure what that word even means

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I'm content for the most part

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

I wouldn't say happy, but more so able to get as far as I have through the struggles. But thinking positive too achieve my goals

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By *arialoueWoman
over a year ago

bradford

No im not happy with my life nothing ever goes to plan or straight forward, always the hard road been like this all my life, dont matter how i try to change it the end result is still the same

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

I am grateful that I woke up this morning and got to spend another day with my family

Many people didn't

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Overall yes I'm happy with how it's turned out so far

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

It's been up and down over the years but yes, I'd say I'm happier now than ever before.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s been an awesome bloody adventure since I was a teenager and it continues still even though I’m nearly 60.

It’s been bloody hard at times but nothing worth having should be easy.

People always tell me I should write a book but I don’t have the time to sit down and do so.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Been a hell of a ride , lots of drama but that's life and I'm certainly happy with that I have and with whatever is to come

positive vibes all round

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

I've experienced some difficult times. I've had some good times but now I face a difficult time

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

If I live to a 104 I'm half way

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By *rFoxAndXenoCouple
over a year ago

Weymouth

I'm happy with where I'm going!! Trying my best to enjoy the journey

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Yes.

Don't get me wrong, bit of a drop and hangover today but generally I'm incredibly happy with where my life is right now. There's been challenges, struggles. Wobbles.

But I'm proud of myself. I have a wonderful fiancé, an adoring amour and a beautiful circle of friends. I think that my life so far, even with the hardships is one I'm very happy to be living.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If I live to a 104 I'm half way

Why would you want to be 104? I know when I'm gonna die. The day I can't wipe my own arse! That's it for me...

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

"If I live to a 104 I'm half way

Why would you want to be 104? I know when I'm gonna die. The day I can't wipe my own arse! That's it for me...

"
lol hey its a struggle in the morning god I have to work up to it

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Turned my hobby into a career (I.T.). Good family and friends.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happy, no. But then I don't think my personality will allow me to be.

However I am content.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are you happy with how your life has been so far? Obviously nobody has a fairtytaio, and life is full of surprises, but what are you grateful for? * Positivity & respectfulness*

as hard as life is/has been, I cant complain.

im healthy and I have a good family, m y son lives with me and were like best friends not just "father and son"

so all in all id say I have a great life.

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By *rincipessaWoman
over a year ago

your wildest dreams,

I very much believe I’m, we’re all responsible for our own happiness and should never expect that from anyone else. So, even though some times are shit and really difficult, it’s about looking and finding something to smile about in every situation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly no. But I'm proud of the fact that I've endured, and I'm well aware that there are people who may have it worse ,so I just get on with things

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

I’ve made some mistakes, but try and learn from them and grow.

I don’t regret anything as I wouldn’t be where I am now if any of it changed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My early life especially was a shit show so happiness has been a battle for me all my life.

I would say now I'm content which is a form of happiness.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm mostly happy now yes.

Have I always been happy? Nope. But that's in the past now so no point dwelling on it.

I'd love to change a few things... but I'm still young and who knows what the future holds. I hope plenty of good things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Younger years No

Older years No

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Happy with my lot... actually grateful for is probably a better way of putting it for me.

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

Feeling really low ATM can't wait to shake it off

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

I am happy now after a few really rough years, it's a long travelled road but with the love and protection of a few good people I'm finally the person I should be.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve got some awesome experiences and 2 kids to boot. (I don’t actualy kick them*, just Tom make that clear

)

*not since I was warned from their Head teacher. Fighting on the schools all weather pitch was always going to draw a complaint from a parent.

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By *avexxMan
over a year ago

cheshire

had bad times like everybody else,, moved on not been easy but feel in a much better place now..

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By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago

Nottingham

I'm rather discontent with life right now and I can't quite put my finger on why. My life is good, beautiful children, varied job, not rich but not poor. Friends, family, support.

Seems rather ungrateful to not be super happy like I used to be.

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

I’m a glass half full kind of person and in spite of some normal life tragedies I’m resilient.

I have an amazing husband (even the ex one isn’t all that bad) my daughter is a typical teenager but we have a super family and we’re grateful for everything we have

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By *andybeachWoman
over a year ago

In the middle

I don’t think I’m meant to be happy, every time I think I see a glimmer of light something happens and I’m back in the dark again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its only missing 1 thing altho the issue is thats the thing that makes me happy

So il say this im happy with aspects of how my life has been altho not anymore its been mainly meh with the worlds greatest highlights with the odd spattering of pure mysery

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By *ust me 999Man
over a year ago

near you

Yes

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By *oubleswing2019Man
over a year ago

Colchester

Yes, once I learned to stop striving for things, or to at least reduce the desire to stop striving for things.

The philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer explained it well when he wrote that the human condition is driven by a will to live. This creates an irrational and impulsive striving of the individual. That's not a singular observation either. Darwin in "The Descent of Man" based his theory of evolution upon the same premise that the prime goal of all living beings is to survive. And the driver of that goal is "The Will".

Sounds fairly obvious and quite innocent so far.

However Schopenhauer posited that the Will was a negative force. This is because it created unhappiness. People are always striving for something and if they achieve it, their moment of bliss is short-lived before they replace it with more striving.

Essentially, the Will is insatiable. Ergo, happiness can never be permanently fulfilled. It can be sated for a brief while, before the cycle begins anew.

Schopenhauer coined a phrase "negative happiness", which means the absence of pain. He proposed a way of life influenced a lot by Hindu and Buddhist thought, in which one tries to escape the demands of the Will. For a European audience unfamiliar with those teachings, it is perhaps best reframed as living a life that is satisfactory. (Schopenhauer's work "The World as Will and Representation" covers this very well.

To summarise, Schopenhauer believed in minimalism. Always desiring things was the basis for much mental suffering in life. To reduce that suffering, desire less. (Which is interesting to note that the ancient Hawaiians have a saying : To be rich, make more or desire less).

So reducing your desires and desiring less allows you to focus on things you can control, and ultimately lessens the pain and suffering in the world, as these are the natural states of the world.

Strive less, and feel gratitude for what you have. Maximize those rare moments of true wonder and pure beauty, where you feel pure joy. Those small moments we all live for.

“Pleasure in the beautiful consists, to a large extent in the fact that, when we enter the state of pure contemplation, we are raised for the moment above all willing, above all desires and cares; we are, so to speak, rid of ourselves.” — Arthur Schopenhauer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Feeling really low ATM can't wait to shake it off"

sending you some positive vibes cherryblossom

I hope you shake it off soon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can actually make yourself happy. It's not easy but you can. You're in control of your emotions and you can think your way to being happy. Just think about the things that make you happy. I suffer with anxiety and depression so some days I'm really low but I think of 3 things in my life I'm happy about and that does help a little. Living the life I live helps as it's my perfect lifestyle. Not knowing where I'll be sleeping, where I'll get cash for next meal ( At this moment in time I have 1.46€) I have some work tomorrow. I need to raise 300€ this week and I'll be heading to Portugal. I can do that if weather stays clear.

Anyway, every morning try and think about 3 things your happy about in your life and concentrate on that. Also another method I use when I'm down is to right 2 lists. Things your happy for and things that are negatives in your life. Make those lists and concentrate on the happy list and the negative list cross out and eliminate them one by one. If they're impossible to eliminate then burn the list. Subconsciously you won't worry as much about them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *he_Secret_GardenWoman
over a year ago

Naughty Lane

"Are you happy with how your life has been so far? Obviously nobody has a fairtytaio, and life is full of surprises, but what are you grateful for? * Positivity & respectfulness*

I've never been happier...

thanks

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By *pentoall555Man
over a year ago

benfleet

Not really would love things to be different but no can do unfortunately

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have survived 46 years of all manner of challenges with blessings scattered through like stars in the night sky.

They keep me buoyed up and looking forwards not backwards.

I'm motivated and massively enthusiastic for what comes next

It's not the falling down that matters, it's the getting back up... taller and stronger every time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Relatively yes,we make our own choices in life,some good,some bad, I've been blessed with 4 great kids and nine amazing Grandkids and my childhood was very happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mostly yes. There are some moments I would rather live again and change, and some others I just want to live again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 14/11/22 21:56:05]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reading some of the comments makes me think what actually is happiness?

Personally I'm content and at peace with myself,but what actually is happiness?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes! Very happy. Full of joy!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I should thank my lucky stars that I'm still here but I'm never 100% happy. Having depression and health worries will do that to you, however I put on a brave face every day even though it's a struggle x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have the power to choose to be happy.. It took me a while to get my head around that! But ultimately we choose to be happy or unhappy

I try yo choose to be positive, resilient and upbeat... But when I slide, i give myself a break and allow myself to wallow for a little

I find xmas real difficult and i know I'll hit rock-bottom.. But as soon as its over, i know I'll start to climb again

Its good to recognise your triggers and have coping techniques to shake it off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have the power to choose to be happy.. It took me a while to get my head around that! But ultimately we choose to be happy or unhappy

I try yo choose to be positive, resilient and upbeat... But when I slide, i give myself a break and allow myself to wallow for a little

I find xmas real difficult and i know I'll hit rock-bottom.. But as soon as its over, i know I'll start to climb again

Its good to recognise your triggers and have coping techniques to shake it off"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We have the power to choose to be happy.. It took me a while to get my head around that! But ultimately we choose to be happy or unhappy

I try yo choose to be positive, resilient and upbeat... But when I slide, i give myself a break and allow myself to wallow for a little

I find xmas real difficult and i know I'll hit rock-bottom.. But as soon as its over, i know I'll start to climb again

Its good to recognise your triggers and have coping techniques to shake it off"

I choose happy a hundred times a day, every day.

Things hurt or annoy or upset.... I'll deal, I'll feel it and I'll move on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m fuckin’ ecstatic.

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By *lubchuckerMan
over a year ago

Oxfordshire

Happy with things ? No

Satisfied with things as they are ? No

I'm resigned to things as they are, getting used to it, i'm not happy with it but its me and who i am

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By *atch0101Man
over a year ago

Here

No ??

Haven't been for sometime.

I wrestle with thoughts daily.

I should be happy and I should be content but I'm not.

I dont even like who I am. You'd think after 54 years I'd be used to it but no. As I get older I'm getting worse.

The age is adding to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m fuckin’ ecstatic.

Hahaha. I love and relate to so many of my posts from the past. The sarcasm is turned to 11

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By *weetCherryWoman
over a year ago

London

Right now? Not in the slightest either

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By *inklersMan
over a year ago

norwich

No. On paper I have no reason not be happy, I’m very fortunate for the life and lifestyle I have however I not happy in life at present

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I will be once I open the wine.

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By *yreGuy99Man
over a year ago

Doesn't matter

Nope, what is there to be happy about?

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By *929Man
over a year ago

newcastle

Not really if I had the chance to map out my life I certainly wouldn’t choose to be turning 40 as a single dad.

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

"No. On paper I have no reason not be happy, I’m very fortunate for the life and lifestyle I have however I not happy in life at present

Hugs x

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

"Not really if I had the chance to map out my life I certainly wouldn’t choose to be turning 40 as a single dad. "

Hugs x

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By *ittlemiss Hal O weenCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

"Nope, what is there to be happy about?"

Hugs x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I count myself really lucky.

I have had lots of challenges and difficult times but here I am. I'm doing OK.

I've got my sons, my dog, amazing friends, a secure job and a comfortable home. I am truly thankful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, parts of it have been quite traumatic and scarring, thankfully I'm though that part of my life a long time now but working on being happy, I've learned it's only me that can make that happen.

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman
over a year ago

Carlisle usually

Hmm. A trying question sometimes.

Currently, a lot of things are genuinely terrible. But also, a lot of things are fucking amazing.

When I can focus on the good, I'm absolutely happy. When I'm working my way through the shitty parts that have to be dealt with, I'm not so happy.

But I can be safe in the knowledge that the shit things will pass. That the people and moments that bring me joy will return soon enough and bring that light back. And in the mean time I'll just slog my way through the unfortunate parts, looking forward to When things are brighter. And treasure those moments that are for everything they are.

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By *inklersMan
over a year ago

norwich

Thanks

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

"Thanks "
my pleasure

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By *adCherriesCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire/Northwest

Happy as a pig in shit

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By *ris GrayMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

"Happy as a pig in shit

"
they are though aren't they another reason why i don't like bacon

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By *yreGuy99Man
over a year ago

Doesn't matter

Is being invisible and never good enough 24/7 something to be happy about?

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By *ansoffateMan
over a year ago

Sagittarius A

My daughters are giggling and are healthy. I am grateful for that.

There's no looming huge problems to deal with definitely grateful for that.

I got a house and all that. I've lived on the streets a bit taught me the value of shelter, somewhere safe to sleep and a door with a lock.

I'm content. Happiness is something that emerges by engaging in something that feels meaningful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For all the things that have been a shit show I am forever grateful for my kids and good friends.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

It could have been worse but it could have been better. It’s not how I thought it would be.

When you’re little you think life will be a lovely romantic adventure, but sometimes it all goes a bit wank.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It could have been worse but it could have been better. It’s not how I thought it would be.

When you’re little you think life will be a lovely romantic adventure, but sometimes it all goes a bit wank.

V. ?!

You make me smile and laugh so many times. This has nailed it!

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