FabSwingers.com forum: Compliments

By *ilky_CocoPuffs OP Couple
over a year ago

Luton

I’m curious. Do compliments matter to you? Is a compliment from your partner more important than compliments from others? So there a gradient go a compliment in your eyes? Eg. if your partner hardly ever pays you any compliment or says” you look ok” or “you look sexy” from time to time to you but to everybody else “you’re stunning”, “you’re more than hot”, or “you’re amazing and I love what you’re wearing”etc ,would you find it upsetting or would you accept a “I’m just trying to be nice” as an explanation. And “ I don’t have to see those people anymore, so I will make them feel good”. Is it important to you to make your partner feel you’re attractive to them or are you fine without them doing so and just giving you basic compliments from time to time or none?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is an excellent thread

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I like my partner to compliment me, he's an honest man so I know he means it and for that reason his compliments mean more to me than a strangers on a swinging site. If we occasionally happens someone stops me in the street to compliment me if means a lot because there's no agenda.

Being complimented on personality traits is very personal and I prefer that to come from my partner usually unless I can tell the other person really means it.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I don't think I answered the question.

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I don't remember ever getting a compliment from a random stranger and I certainly haven't given one.

I struggle with compliments in general even from people I know but I am more comfortable giving than receiving.

I tend to laugh off any compliment at the time but feel better about them afterwards.

They are important but their effect differs depending on my mood at the time and if I need a lift or not.

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

I like compliments but I'm just not very good at taking them lol... I often get strangers complimenting me on my hair.. especially if it's freshly coloured! My hubby frequently tells me I'm sexy..I rarely believe him though lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't think I answered the question.

It was an amazing answer x

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

I had a compliment yesterday. I thanked that person, because after wracking my brain, I don’t think anyones ever said that kind of thing before.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I wouldn't be best impressed if a partner gave glowing praise to others and I got the occasional bottom of the barrel compliment absentmindedly. In my mind someone should be with you because they think you're wonderful/hot/whatever and even if they don't tell you frequently, it should be shown and sincerely.

Compliments are nice. Do they matter? Ach. I'm not sure. From a partner yes. But not all the time, in fact I think I value them more when a person doesn't say it often if that makes sense?

I think that I do place more value on things said to me by those I'm seeing than a stranger yes. A good friend? I'm not sure I rank it like that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only truly complement those who deserve it otherwise it loses meaning

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Actually thinking about it, yeah, there are definitely a few things that I like being complimented on. I'm not sure if I'm needy or human though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Actually thinking about it, yeah, there are definitely a few things that I like being complimented on. I'm not sure if I'm needy or human though.

"
winking anus?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wouldn't be best impressed if a partner gave glowing praise to others and I got the occasional bottom of the barrel compliment absentmindedly. In my mind someone should be with you because they think you're wonderful/hot/whatever and even if they don't tell you frequently, it should be shown and sincerely.

Compliments are nice. Do they matter? Ach. I'm not sure. From a partner yes. But not all the time, in fact I think I value them more when a person doesn't say it often if that makes sense?

I think that I do place more value on things said to me by those I'm seeing than a stranger yes. A good friend? I'm not sure I rank it like that."

A brilliant answer as ever, Meli x

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By *ilky_CocoPuffs OP Couple
over a year ago

Luton

"This is an excellent thread

Thank you. I’m very interested in what people say. I’ve been told that I should know how people/the person feels about me and not care that they compliment others more than me and in a better way than just “you look ok or sexy” very rarely. Let’s see what others think

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

I think that I do place more value on things said to me by those I'm seeing than a stranger yes. A good friend? I'm not sure I rank it like that.

A brilliant answer as ever, Meli x"

Ha! I don't count yours unless there's an A* involved. xox

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

I like physical compliments rather than word ones, the hand gliding over my bum, his eyes that eat me up, that sorta thing

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By *nto the LouWoman
over a year ago

Preston

I don’t mind compliments from other women, but I don’t believe any given by a man. I’d much rather have compliments that aren’t about looks tbh, they’re worth a lot more to me. (I know k have issues btw

)

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By *rincipessaWoman
over a year ago

your wildest dreams,

Not really ever been use to them so often don’t know how to deal with them. Maybe I’m just too suspicious but when they come from randoms in the street or while I’m working, those creep me out, I always wonder what the agenda is.

It’s a funny one for me though. I’m a people pleaser, it’s what I’ve always tried to do all my life and so I love compliments from my friends, my significant people because it makes me feel like I’ve somehow pleased them and that makes me feel good.

And so, for them to compliment someone else lots and not me upsets me, makes me feel like I’ve failed in pleasing them.

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By *ed VoluptaWoman
over a year ago

Wirral.

Genuine/truthful compliments are lovely. I'm a lot better at accepted them now than I was when I was younger,they just used to embarrass me.

I've been complimented by strangers & I have often complimented folk in the street, etc. That means more to me than folk I know complimenting me continuously. Especially when I feel they're disingenuous.

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By *reedy JamesMan
over a year ago

South Yorkshire

Compliments matter a lot, both from my wife but also from other people (and this goes for non sexual compliments too!)

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By *ostAirmenMan
over a year ago

crewe

Who doesn’t t like a compliment as long as it is genuine . Chivalry , manners and general gentlemen esk behaviour seems to be a dying trait

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doughnut doesn't pay me many compliments, it's just not him, he is starting too as it was getting to me a bit and it might sound shallow but I'd make an effort when going to a club or something and he wouldn't say anything, I know in his head he is saying it, he just doesn't verbalise very well (considering be likes the sound of his own voice most of the time, it's unusual lol).

I find it hard from others to hear it though, a guy was saying yesterday that he couldn't believe I was talking to him, that I was really hot....it's the other way round! See, don't take them well at all!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do like a compliment. I probably appreciate them more from people who know and spend time with me because sometimes they feel a bit meaningless and generic even, especially on here.

You can usually tell when someone is genuine though, and that's lovely.

My partner complimenting me is very important. I like to feel recognised I suppose. And desirable. I naturally am very complimentary anyway, especially to my partner and loved ones. I guess some could get fed up of it but I enjoy letting people know they are seen and what I do say is pretty much always sincere.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never ever had one from someone close to me,if anything they say things to belittle me, so when someone does give me a compliment I find it very hard to accept

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do like a compliment. I probably appreciate them more from people who know and spend time with me because sometimes they feel a bit meaningless and generic even, especially on here.

You can usually tell when someone is genuine though, and that's lovely.

Nice tits x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My compliments which are regularly and honestly given mean a lot to Dora but she also enjoys genuine compliments from men that like her pictures.

Me I don’t care either way.

I wouldn’t be put down by anyone which is more important to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do like a compliment. I probably appreciate them more from people who know and spend time with me because sometimes they feel a bit meaningless and generic even, especially on here.

You can usually tell when someone is genuine though, and that's lovely.

Nice tits x

I know deep down you do actually mean that love. X

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

I think everyone appreciates a compliment if it's genuinely sincere. I don't give them out unless they're justified and see little point in giving them just for the sake of it.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

It depends on the context. A compliment from someone d*unk in a bar or a club isn't worth as much as someone who is sober

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’m curious. Do compliments matter to you? Is a compliment from your partner more important than compliments from others? So there a gradient go a compliment in your eyes? Eg. if your partner hardly ever pays you any compliment or says” you look ok” or “you look sexy” from time to time to you but to everybody else “you’re stunning”, “you’re more than hot”, or “you’re amazing and I love what you’re wearing”etc ,would you find it upsetting or would you accept a “I’m just trying to be nice” as an explanation. And “ I don’t have to see those people anymore, so I will make them feel good”. Is it important to you to make your partner feel you’re attractive to them or are you fine without them doing so and just giving you basic compliments from time to time or none? "

I would be very upset if a partner was complimenting other women more than me. I would imagine it having a huge effect on your self esteem if he were telling other women they are amazing or stunning and you get the occasional you look ok. What about making you feel good?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I do like a compliment. I probably appreciate them more from people who know and spend time with me because sometimes they feel a bit meaningless and generic even, especially on here.

You can usually tell when someone is genuine though, and that's lovely.

Nice tits x

I know deep down you do actually mean that love. X "

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I think I'd be looking for a new partner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Being a single Pringle I don’t have the comparison of a partner, but guys I know and hang out with I’ve noticed lose the compliments. Maybe it’s familiarity.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If MrWho showered other people in compliments, but neglected to show me the same appreciation I'd feel fairly shitty. Fortunately he's very generous with his praise towards me. I don't always agree with him, depending on how I feel about myself, but I know he means it (even if he is wrong!).

Compliments from my loved ones and close friends are very welcome as it's nice to feel recognised and appreciated. The people I'm close to aren't gushy types, so when they say something in praise I know it's heartfelt.

From anyone else, new acquaintances, strangers from fab etc. I'm always suspicious. Some people have an agenda, some people just say nice things out of habit or to be polite. Until I really know a person I'll often distrust a compliment.

Nell

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like receiving them but struggle to accept them. If someone says my hair looks nice, I don't just say thank you...I have to say. Oohhh I've just washed it, I don't usually. If someone likes my dress.....ohhhh it was in the sale. Cheap. If someone says I'm pretty or have a good body. I think they are just being nice but don't mean it. I'm useless lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Understand this totally. Compliments should surely be given as a matter of course to the person whom you are in any kind of relationship or are attracted too. No?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They're nice and uplifting, and often memorable.

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By *ittlemissFlirtyCouple
over a year ago

Southampton

"I like receiving them but struggle to accept them. If someone says my hair looks nice, I don't just say thank you...I have to say. Oohhh I've just washed it, I don't usually. If someone likes my dress.....ohhhh it was in the sale. Cheap. If someone says I'm pretty or have a good body. I think they are just being nice but don't mean it. I'm useless lol"

I'm exactly the same, I struggle to accept compliments x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good compliments everyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

**“ I don’t have to see those people anymore, so I will make them feel good”. **

Is it important to you to make your partner feel you’re attractive to them or are you fine without them doing so and just giving you basic compliments from time to time or none? "

** Bloody hell! I'd be finding a new partner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Compliments are always welcome.

We both give each other compliments and they are not lip service (fake) compliments either.

Compliments from other people are also n ice to receive too, we are all human and all like to be 'endorsed' by our peers no matter what it is for.

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By *ilky_CocoPuffs OP Couple
over a year ago

Luton

**“ I don’t have to see those people anymore, so I will make them feel good”. **

Is it important to you to make your partner feel you’re attractive to them or are you fine without them doing so and just giving you basic compliments from time to time or none?

** Bloody hell! I'd be finding a new partner."

It’s a question I posted up for debate. I didn’t say it was my reality

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By *ilky_CocoPuffs OP Couple
over a year ago

Luton

Loving the perspectives so far. Thank you for getting involved in answering, everyone.

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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago

Redhill

5 minutes ago I got showered in compliments on messages. I said I wasn’t meeting or interested. Then suddenly I had an ugly face and was obese.

LOL

I have always been complimented on my smile, since I was a child… it was harder for me to accept compliments when I was younger. Now I accept them and appreciate them. I don’t get complimented when out and about on physical attributes, but usually on something I’d be wearing… maybe a handbag or shoes.

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By *eard and BoobsCouple
over a year ago

Portstewart

Compliments are nice we like both giving them and receiving them also

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I complement Gayle everyday as she is gorgeous xx simples

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

**“ I don’t have to see those people anymore, so I will make them feel good”. **

Is it important to you to make your partner feel you’re attractive to them or are you fine without them doing so and just giving you basic compliments from time to time or none?

** Bloody hell! I'd be finding a new partner.

It’s a question I posted up for debate. I didn’t say it was my reality

Apologies, I meant in that scenario. Not that your partner is like that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Think people can be uncomfortable accepting a compliment perhaps because they link it to vanity and feel they should deny whatever has been said. I was like that till someone pointed out that I'm making assumptions re the other person's opinion and that I should accept that in their view X/Y/Z appeals to them. I give compliments freely, why not? At work, if someone is looking good or has done something great or helped me in some way, I let them know, it's amazing how quickly it raises a smile. I believe if the words are genuine and not 'fab compliments' it can really lift a person.

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By *ab FunstersCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

It's always nice to receive a compliment, it does mean more from my husband.

I always make a point of telling someone if they look nice, lovely dress or your hair looks great today etc. You see the pleasure on that persons face and their shoulders lift a little. It might be the only good thing that happens to them that day..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m a big giver of words of affirmation which I feel like comes across. I like to receive love in that way too. So compliments are important to me (Don’t worry I have therapy). But finding people that love in that way is not easy. It’s exhausting for others.

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By *he_Secret_GardenWoman
over a year ago

Naughty Lane

And im shit at giving them myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had a lot of compliments since joining Fab that I never thought I would and I used to really enjoy them and thought I felt validated in my looks as a result.

However, now I don't really take them seriously because when they compliment me, they're talking purely about my body when they don't know what my face looks like or how I come across. Therefore, it's only really those compliments I've started taking to heart instead.

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By *XXDREAMMan
over a year ago

sudbury

99% of the compliments made on here are just an attempt to get in one’s pants

I think any compliment from a partner or significant other should be appreciated a lot more than it generally is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can't take compliments. Flattery is always to decieve in my mind and it is hard to shake. I don't pay compliments, but I will give an honest appraisal. If I think someone is fishing for compliments I tend to be overly critical in response.

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

"It's always nice to receive a compliment, it does mean more from my husband.

That sounds quite patronising to me tbh

I think quite often the giving of compliments is more about what it does for the giver...often seen when they get the hump if the receiver doesn't show gratitude

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can wake up looking like a combed my hair with a grenade. He still compliments me every morning with good morning beautiful. I never had that before my ex was a narcissist. 10 years strong with my husband and I wouldn't change a thing.

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By *ab FunstersCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

"It's always nice to receive a compliment, it does mean more from my husband.

That sounds quite patronising to me tbh

I think quite often the giving of compliments is more about what it does for the giver...often seen when they get the hump if the receiver doesn't show gratitude "

Well you completely misinterpreted my intentions.

If i notice a collegue is not feeling to good, a kind comment meant to make them feel better and possibly a hug goes a long way.Not patronising in the slightest...caring and concerned about their welfare, absolutely..

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

"I’m a big giver of words of affirmation which I feel like comes across. I like to receive love in that way too. So compliments are important to me (Don’t worry I have therapy). But finding people that love in that way is not easy. It’s exhausting for others. "

It definitely does come across but that's part of what makes you so very likeable and a joy to read. I quite like people who speak in a similar language to mine.

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By *TG3Man
over a year ago

Dorchester

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