FabSwingers.com forum: What some married men on here are crying out for

By *lder A Wiser Passion OP Woman
over a year ago

morecambe

Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So are you fucking a married man and looking for some kind of justification?

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By *agic.MMan
over a year ago

Orpington

Hallelujah! preach Queen! Tell the world how it's like !

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By *llblueMan
over a year ago

Irvine

Everyone has a 'situation' nice to know some people don't judge others.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh cry me a river! Then they should just leave!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

So! If a man cheats it's a woman's fault?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think that perspective is a bucket of nonsense.

It infantilises men (and the women who 'cheat' too btw)

It is apologist theory absolving them of responsibility for THEIR choices.

Every thought, word, action or deed is a PERSONAL CHOICE

As far as I am aware mind control and human puppetry are things of fiction so let's not start saying a person did XYZ because blah blah blah. In full possession of the facts these men and women DECIDE with a clear mind to step outside of their relationship and it is 100% their choice and with that choice comes 100% accountability.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men have needs. Women should fuck their husbands every day and always be there to listen to them. If they don't it's their own fault that the poor man has been driven to look for sex and ears elsewhere.

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

Half right, any relationship is a two way partnership and lack of intimacy etc equally goes both ways..

Communication is fundamental, yes respect that for some it's not an easy one to have in opening up about desires and wants etc..

Maybe and I've nothing to base it upon other than a thought is that sites like this give some even a very few an easier (albeit risky) option than actually being fully honest about the many aspects of sexual behaviours we all have..

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By *ischiefManaged69Couple
over a year ago

Preston

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

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By *oly Fuck Sticks BatmanCouple
over a year ago

here & there

You’ve hit the nail on the head - while “cheating” is not the best course of action, we completely understand how it happens.

Life is never a simple black or white, there are vast swathes of grey that people outside of the relationship will never get to experience or even see/hear about.

From both of our personal experiences we never judge people’s choices because you know people in glass houses!

Intimacy/affection doesn’t need to be sex, it could be as simple as sitting next to each other on the sofa or a little touch as you walk past them.

Being ignored/dismissed by one’s partner is hard to deal with.

Loneliness is a crushing feeling - from experience we find that people just want to be acknowledged & valued.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I certainly get the impression that a lot of married people are looking for intimacy and try to find that through sex.

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By *inkForLifeCouple
over a year ago

North Shields

It works both ways, but I understand your point, however I don't believe this is fundamentally a male vs female issue.

What I see is that an awful lot of couples don't consider their sexual needs when choosing a partner.

The issue is how we often establish relationships. Sex comes after love has already been created.

It's frowned upon in society to suggest that the basis of your relationship is sex, or sexual attraction/compatability, but we as humans massively undervalue our sexual needs.

Cheating is cheating, but if a partner requires something specific their partner can't or won't give them, that isn't in itself a reason to split up. It should ideally be a mutual agreement to seek it else where, however we do need to accept that for some people, having that itch scratched once every year or whatever, can actually make you a much better partner at home.

It's a bit of a catch 22 though. If you had the open communication with your partner, you'd most likely not be in this situation to start with, so simply saying "talk about it" isn't probably a viable option for 99% of people.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

I’m sure this thread will be a good read

My thoughts are - it is no business of mine what other people do with their lives as long as they are honest and straight with me so I can choose if I want to meet them. Otherwise I really don’t concern myself with what others do and don’t do one bit.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

You’re only getting one side of the story. I’m sure their partner would have an entirely different take on things.

And if someone can lie to their partner why wouldn’t they lie to you?

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Nope don't agree,I hate this blaming partners business online.

People's circumstances are different ,some cheat cos they can and others do for different reasons that people might be more sympathetic to

You only know what they're telling you on here ,if you heard their partners side of it ,it might be very different op.

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

This looks like a good reason to avoid married men. We swing to have fun, not to spend all night listeneing to someone's marriage problems.

If they want a shoulder to cry on there are people that have done courses and stuff for that.

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By *m3232Man
over a year ago

maidenhead

"You’ve hit the nail on the head - while “cheating” is not the best course of action, we completely understand how it happens.

Life is never a simple black or white, there are vast swathes of grey that people outside of the relationship will never get to experience or even see/hear about.

From both of our personal experiences we never judge people’s choices because you know people in glass houses!

Intimacy/affection doesn’t need to be sex, it could be as simple as sitting next to each other on the sofa or a little touch as you walk past them.

Being ignored/dismissed by one’s partner is hard to deal with.

Loneliness is a crushing feeling - from experience we find that people just want to be acknowledged & valued.

Absolutely spot on there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op you are very right in what you say,nothing in life is black or white.

I wish I could talk to you about it j x

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By *ink Panther.Woman
over a year ago

Preston

Both parties can be guilty of cheating for a multitude of reasons.

I was guilty of it. At the time I couldn’t leave because my ex wanted to split the children up. He wanted my son and for me to take my daughter. I couldn’t let that happen so had to wait until the children were old enough to be listened to if it came to that. Unfortunately I couldn’t carry on for that long and we split up prior to that. My daughter came with me and my son ended up going backwards and forwards between the two of us. Now both kids don’t like him that much, they’re a bit older and can see what I was contending with on a daily basis.

I’m not saying what I did was right but I value my sanity and it was rapidly leaving me. Cheating and messaging helped.

So it isn’t always the woman or man at fault and maybe they’re both to blame. It’s not always as easy as just leaving especially when children are involved. I’ve no idea what the answer is.

I do think it’s more acceptable for women to cheat but that’s purely down to the numbers. On Fab the ratio of men to women is astronomical so men aren’t so critical of a lot of things women do so they can meet.

I did meet married men. It worked for me, no strings. However there were a large number I wouldn’t meet regardless of connection. I found their circumstances etc distasteful. I treated each person as an individual

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

I was in an abusive marriage for years but I still never cheated. She did, many times.

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By *weetCruellaWoman
over a year ago

somewhere sweet and sour

"I think that perspective is a bucket of nonsense.

It infantilises men (and the women who 'cheat' too btw)

It is apologist theory absolving them of responsibility for THEIR choices.

Every thought, word, action or deed is a PERSONAL CHOICE

There are serious issues of communication problems here. Maybe she does want it but the man is a abuser who has sex his way? (An abuser will never admit they are an abuser, also they will give a sob story to the next victim)

Maybe the man doesn't turn her on the way he used to. Maybe shes going through menopause.

Or maybe the man has not opened his eyes to just how much she does for him and kids etc.

People make that conscious choice to cheat.

Think people should ask all the questions before entering a relationship that could span decades lol i would have a clipboard and questions lol

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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago

Redhill

"Both parties can be guilty of cheating for a multitude of reasons.

I’m not saying what I did was right but I value my sanity and it was rapidly leaving me. Cheating and messaging helped.

So it isn’t always the woman or man at fault and maybe they’re both to blame. It’s not always as easy as just leaving especially when children are involved. I’ve no idea what the answer is.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This looks like a good reason to avoid married men. We swing to have fun, not to spend all night listeneing to someone's marriage problems.

If they want a shoulder to cry on there are people that have done courses and stuff for that."

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

"
You're 100 % correct...and women in sexless zero affection marriages are here for exactly the same reason

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

"
a few but most just want their cake and eat it themselves.

Family at home loving wife, regular sex and still want more.

Popcorn time

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"This looks like a good reason to avoid married men. We swing to have fun, not to spend all night listeneing to someone's marriage problems.

If they want a shoulder to cry on there are people that have done courses and stuff for that."
I tried talking...I suggested counselling but she was too proud ..shy or embarrassed to consider it...hence the break up ...

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I think there are a lot of people in all genders and walks of life, whose lives could be improved by communicating more with their nearest and perhaps not so dearest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not having sex with a wife is not just down to a wife Not interested.

My wife over the last 20 years has slowly been getting worse with her health, mobility and having numerous hospital stays. She is in constant pain in her hips, legs and arms. I'm her full time carer and still love her but I still want a normal life but not another wife.

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By *mber and FireCouple
over a year ago

Carmarthenshire

"Being driven?" No. People make their own choices and need to own those choices.

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By *inkForLifeCouple
over a year ago

North Shields

"Not having sex with a wife is not just down to a wife Not interested.

Totally understand that, and it must be incredibly difficult.

Is this something you've been able to discuss? If the roles were reversed, would you be content with her seeking sexual satisfaction else where?

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By *ociable-NottmCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

"Oh cry me a river! Then they should just leave! "

This

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Not having sex with a wife is not just down to a wife Not interested.

We knew a woman in your position and to an extent my father was (although he is much older than you). It's hard for everyone involved.

Of course you want a normal life and you're probably grieving the loss of that. I remember my dad saying he just wanted one last summer where they could go out together for coffee.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do agree with what you're saying. I think men do get loads of shit for cheating. It's not always black and white. I know my dad cheated on my mum but she put him through hell, she did the same to him and it didn't make me resent him.

I always recommend walking away if it gets to the point you're going to cheat, but it is never that simple.

And some people do it even if they've got a diamond at home, no issues and a good relationship. I think everyone who gets involved in cheating on either side is a bit of a See You Next Tuesday, but some more so than others.

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By *entBarryUKMan
over a year ago

Ashford

I'm married but not being driven into anyone's arms. We have plenty of sex, we just like having fun apart as well. Not all married men in here are cheating, but the cheaters ruin it for the genuine swingers.

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By *J and CBCouple
over a year ago

Uttoxeter

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

"
NO!!!!

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

Not everyone has marriage problems, I'm happily married and we love each other very much, but medical issues have stopped us having a sex life. We are as close now as we ever were, I get to swing as a form of sexual surrogacy as long as I abide by rules.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not everyone has marriage problems, I'm happily married and we love each other very much, but medical issues have stopped us having a sex life. We are as close now as we ever were, I get to swing as a form of sexual surrogacy as long as I abide by rules. "

Excellent to hear that you have a solution, and you seem like you could and would respect all those rules too. Swingers goals right there

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

It is very complicated and hard work, but my baby loves me

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

No. I really don't think you are right. No where near right.

You've given a very one sided, cherry picked , assumptive , loaded argument.

You are not right.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"So! If a man cheats it's a woman's fault?"

That seems the long and short of it

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I think that perspective is a bucket of nonsense.

It infantilises men (and the women who 'cheat' too btw)

It is apologist theory absolving them of responsibility for THEIR choices.

Every thought, word, action or deed is a PERSONAL CHOICE

Correct ! Apart from there being no mind control ........ c'mon course there is.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Men have needs. Women should fuck their husbands every day and always be there to listen to them. If they don't it's their own fault that the poor man has been driven to look for sex and ears elsewhere. "

I think you wrote that book in the 40's ..... or was it on another continent ?

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Lol no... Men aren't being driven to anything, it's a choice. Same goes for women, to be fair.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just sounds to me like OP just wants to justify fucking married men! There’s also 2 sides to it and you’ve just heard one side. Plenty of people both male and female just want to have their cake and to eat it too!

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Just sounds to me like OP just wants to justify fucking married men! There’s also 2 sides to it and you’ve just heard one side. Plenty of people both male and female just want to have their cake and to eat it too!"

I want cake .......

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By *oly Fuck Sticks BatmanCouple
over a year ago

here & there

I want cake ......."

Will there be tea too? Bloody love tea!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

There are lots of men who won't have sex with their female partners...

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I want cake .......

Will there be tea too? Bloody love tea! "

Of course there'll be tea! Bring cups

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want cake .......

Will there be tea too? Bloody love tea!

Of course there'll be tea! Bring cups"

Sorry no tea, only coffee, I hate tea

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

This thread blows hot and cold, I love it. ??

I think it just proves that even though some people's motives may not be entirely honourable, people are still very sexual creatures and we shouldn't repress ourselves. But, you should communicate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So! If a man cheats it's a woman's fault?

That seems the long and short of it "

According to every cheating thread started by a “single” woman you’d think the opposite was true.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Love this type of topic .. ready with my snacks and drinks .. carry on people

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By *hakeurlegsMan
over a year ago

everywhere. and nowhere baby

Don’t see it matters tbh on here everyone’s pretty much looking for fun and abit of excitement but you always get some take the moral high ground

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By *he_Last_TitanMan
over a year ago

Bristol

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

Buddy, speak to your wife. As scary as the thought may be, it’s the only route towards a happy life for you both - with or without each other.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Me and the wife both have our Cake and get to eat it, I'm on here and Go to clubs, she has a loving relationship with a BF, we just want for each other to live life to the full, it's just a shame people have to cheat to be able to injoy life.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

Buddy, speak to your wife. As scary as the thought may be, it’s the only route towards a happy life for you both - with or without each other. "

Buddy is a woman.

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

Yes. In some cases absolutely. Recognition. Acknowledgement. Intimacy. Conversation. Yes of course. There will be those judging and saying.. Just leave. That may work for some. It is rarely ever only one person's fault.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is some truth in this. SOME men are great husbands and have tried everything to get that spark back but it doesn’t work. They can’t leave due to kids or financial commitments. On the flip side SOME are just shit husbands and their wife doesn’t want to fuck them because they’re complete arseholes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don’t see it matters tbh on here everyone’s pretty much looking for fun and abit of excitement but you always get some take the moral high ground"

You seem to think being on here means people don’t have morals! Sorry that I think potentially destroying someone you claim to love is low!

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

In my experience the married men with problems are 'door mats'. They are eventually divorced. They need to think about what goes on outside the bedroom first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutely agree in a way because, whether it be a man or a woman, cheating is only happening because they aren’t getting the intimacy or passion or desires fulfilled from their partner. Yeah they should talk about it or end the relationship but it isn’t always black and white. Both parts are to blame for the cheating it’s definitely not one sided

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By *onyjoCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough

There is no excuse for cheating a couple sort it. If it can't be sorted they split its that simple.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So! If a man cheats it's a woman's fault?"

First rule of Fab, innit?

If a man cheats (and there’s LOADS of men cheating on Fab

) it’s clearly because he is a bad man.

If a woman cheats (and there’s LOADS of women cheating on Fab

), it’s clearly because her fella is a bad man.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So! If a man cheats it's a woman's fault?"

See I didn't read it like that. I read it more as sometimes women can drive their partner away.

I don't think that means they are responsible for their partner cheating, it's only the cheater who can be responsible there. But I read it more in a way it isn't always just down to the man being selfish and wanting sex.

I don't think OP worded it well, but I do understand where she's coming from.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There is no excuse for cheating a couple sort it. If it can't be sorted they split its that simple. "

It’s that simple folks

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

Ohh please! Being driven into another woman's arms!! They are just scumbags!! X

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By *exymarvelMan
over a year ago

cardiff

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

Absolutely 100%

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By *exymarvelMan
over a year ago

cardiff

Have bent over backwards to give everything needed, but alas was never enough

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Absolutely agree in a way because, whether it be a man or a woman, cheating is only happening because they aren’t getting the intimacy or passion or desires fulfilled from their partner. Yeah they should talk about it or end the relationship but it isn’t always black and white. Both parts are to blame for the cheating it’s definitely not one sided"

Totally disagree with the idea that ' cheating ONLY happens because they are not getting their yadas fullfilled' ....

Cheating happens because they value sex over everything else and put themselves first. I'm not even saying they are in the wrong. I'm saying cheating happens because they decide it will. No other reason.

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

Finally! Preach. and while we're on Don't forget the cooking and shopping.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Have bent over backwards to give everything needed, but alas was never enough"

There's a joke there but I have to be the better person always.......

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Finally! Preach. and while we're on Don't forget the cooking and shopping. "

Cleaning.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

"Have bent over backwards to give everything needed, but alas was never enough

There's a joke there but I have to be the better person always....... "

Well done on restraining yourself Granny

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By *etefromderbyMan
over a year ago

Derby

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

Wow its true isn't it! U maybe still really love and fancy the pants off ur partner but things and different pressures have come between u both.

Maybe u just need to feel the touch of someone to make u feel better and desirable just for that hour or 2 before normality has to set back in

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

Can we dial down the hostility a little, I know passions can get the better of us but it's supposed to be a discussion not an argument. Yes there are some scumbags we know, but anyone with a genuine need to talk may be put off.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Have bent over backwards to give everything needed, but alas was never enough

There's a joke there but I have to be the better person always.......

Well done on restraining yourself Granny

Fanks

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"Can we dial down the hostility a little, I know passions can get the better of us but it's supposed to be a discussion not an argument. Yes there are some scumbags we know, but anyone with a genuine need to talk may be put off."

Well seems some need to discuss and share and some need to insult and bully. But you make a great point.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

You see hostility ?

I see a discussion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Every person has their own personal circumstances. judging somebody you know little or nothing about carries zero weight .

The adage walk a mile in someone else's shoes does,except sometimes its not miles its year upon year and the smug response if its not right just leave is just as insensitive. Life's full of cheaters ,in jobs,in relationships,in finances...

Until you know every detail, you have no right to judge or even comment upon anyone

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"So! If a man cheats it's a woman's fault?

See I didn't read it like that. I read it more as sometimes women can drive their partner away.

I don't think OP worded it well, but I do understand where she's coming from. "

I read it as sometimes men feel they're being driven away and instead of sitting down with their partner and having a difficult chat get behind the wheel and put their foot down hard.

How are you by the way? Hope you're feeling better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

My ex tortured me for long time when we just had a baby .

She drove me to go

Tho I never cheated .

I ended it first .

Got out of it .

then moved on .

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By *oly Fuck Sticks BatmanCouple
over a year ago

here & there

"So! If a man cheats it's a woman's fault?

See I didn't read it like that. I read it more as sometimes women can drive their partner away.

I don't think OP worded it well, but I do understand where she's coming from. "

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Rather than pointing the finger directly at the men/man don't forget the women/woman whom are also doing this

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

My ex tortured me for long time when we just had a baby .

She drove me to go

Tho I never cheated .

I ended it first .

Got out of it .

then moved on .

She tortured you?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"There is no excuse for cheating a couple sort it. If it can't be sorted they split its that simple.

It’s that simple folks

I wish I'd known this earlier.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Rather than pointing the finger directly at the men/man don't forget the women/woman whom are also doing this

Yeah but men drive them to it doncha know

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

My ex tortured me for long time when we just had a baby .

She drove me to go

Tho I never cheated .

I ended it first .

Got out of it .

then moved on .

Very sensitive / emotional /hormonal time following a birth.

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

Finally! Preach. and while we're on Don't forget the cooking and shopping.

Cleaning."

Would it kill you to run a duster round your minge?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

My ex tortured me for long time when we just had a baby .

She drove me to go

Tho I never cheated .

I ended it first .

Got out of it .

then moved on .

Very sensitive / emotional /hormonal time following a birth."

For women too Granny

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Finally! Preach. and while we're on Don't forget the cooking and shopping.

Cleaning.

Would it kill you to run a duster round your minge? "

Actual lols

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By *ociable-NottmCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

"There is no excuse for cheating a couple sort it. If it can't be sorted they split its that simple. "

Agree, any cheat will always justify why they didn’t leave it’s an attempt to lessen their own guilty feelings.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

My ex tortured me for long time when we just had a baby .

She drove me to go

Tho I never cheated .

I ended it first .

Got out of it .

then moved on .

She tortured you?

Good morning .

Yeah . Emotional n financial violence . Very dark and very painful …

To her as any other lady I be with I always say :

- Please talk , always talk

Couples who don’t talk get in very bad position

If u hide n kept it can cause serious damage .

And I think that’s the problem

People don’t talk . When sometimes what is the head is fake .

Both paranoid the other is cheating

When I’m real either would never do such think

Don’t talk . Goes down for nothing

Drama

Is all about talk . Doesn’t matter how bad it will sound

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

My ex tortured me for long time when we just had a baby .

She drove me to go

Tho I never cheated .

I ended it first .

Got out of it .

then moved on .

She tortured you?

Good morning .

Yeah . Emotional n financial violence . Very dark and very painful …

To her as any other lady I be with I always say :

- Please talk , always talk

Couples who don’t talk get in very bad position

If u hide n kept it can cause serious damage .

And I think that’s the problem

People don’t talk . When sometimes what is the head is fake .

Both paranoid the other is cheating

When I’m real either would never do such think

Don’t talk . Goes down for nothing

Drama

Is all about talk . Doesn’t matter how bad it will sound

I'm sorry to hear that

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Every person has their own personal circumstances. judging somebody you know little or nothing about carries zero weight .

Until you know every detail, you have no right to judge or even comment upon anyone"

I agree with you.

Most people (of all genders) do not plan on cheating or the lying that comes with it.

Most people are missing something in their relationships to make them look outside that relationship.

Most do not just look for sex but to fill a void of a different nature, for example not being listened to, not getting affection etc.

Just telling somebody to "get out and leave" is unhelpful and I do not ever say that these days - I simply state that I would not like to knowingly meet an attached person who operates without their partner's consent - my choice.

I say so in a kindly manner because I do NOT know ALL the circumstances.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

"Rather than pointing the finger directly at the men/man don't forget the women/woman whom are also doing this

Yeah but men drive them to it doncha know"

My answer to this some women can also do this as well, theirs good and bad in both at times sadly as it is

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

I think there is a difference between seeking solace from someone’s ears and seeking it in their muff

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By *weetiepie99Woman
over a year ago

cardiff

No. I think you are wrong.

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By *oobyHotwifeWoman
over a year ago

Thurrock

That of course will be true of some but not many

& there's two sides to every story, why is the wife not listening, providing intimacy, is it because she's also not getting the emotional and physical support she needs from the relationship

Things are very rarely as black and white or as clear cut as you've written, I bet if you spoke to their wife/ partner she'd also be telling you a very similar story

It needs to be addressed between themselves or a with a third party being a counsellor not someone they've met on FAB

However you decorate it that's what your describing is cheating and no good can come of that other than the few seconds of post sex euphoria

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Rather than pointing the finger directly at the men/man don't forget the women/woman whom are also doing this

Yeah but men drive them to it doncha know

My answer to this some women can also do this as well, theirs good and bad in both at times sadly as it is "

I agree my comment was firmly tongue in cheek

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"I think there is a difference between seeking solace from someone’s ears and seeking it in their muff"

Of course there is a difference.

But having listened to many couples and singles about the reasons why they ended up in that situation has changed my mind over the years and made me less judgmental of so-called cheaters.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"That of course will be true of some but not many

& there's two sides to every story, why is the wife not listening, providing intimacy, is it because she's also not getting the emotional and physical support she needs from the relationship

Things are very rarely as black and white or as clear cut as you've written, I bet if you spoke to their wife/ partner she'd also be telling you a very similar story

It needs to be addressed between themselves or a with a third party being a counsellor not someone they've met on FAB

However you decorate it that's what your describing is cheating and no good can come of that other than the few seconds of post sex euphoria "

Absolutely

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I think there is a difference between seeking solace from someone’s ears and seeking it in their muff"

Me too. It's much harder to get the solace out of your ears.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

100% right! I am one of those men. No matter what i do, how much i spoil her, make sure she can relax after work, its never good enough. Im told we dont have sex anymore because she loves me. When we had sex, that was lust!

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

"I think there is a difference between seeking solace from someone’s ears and seeking it in their muff

Me too. It's much harder to get the solace out of your ears. "

Quote of the Year award goes to...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"100% right! I am one of those men. No matter what i do, how much i spoil her, make sure she can relax after work, its never good enough. Im told we dont have sex anymore because she loves me. When we had sex, that was lust!"

Then why don’t you leave? If someone truly loves you they’d at least listen to your side of things and try to make it work. If they don’t then I think you’ve got bigger problems than sex.

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

"Rather than pointing the finger directly at the men/man don't forget the women/woman whom are also doing this

Yeah but men drive them to it doncha know

My answer to this some women can also do this as well, theirs good and bad in both at times sadly as it is

I agree my comment was firmly tongue in cheek

I know it was

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You’ve hit the nail on the head - while “cheating” is not the best course of action, we completely understand how it happens.

Life is never a simple black or white, there are vast swathes of grey that people outside of the relationship will never get to experience or even see/hear about.

From both of our personal experiences we never judge people’s choices because you know people in glass houses!

Intimacy/affection doesn’t need to be sex, it could be as simple as sitting next to each other on the sofa or a little touch as you walk past them.

Being ignored/dismissed by one’s partner is hard to deal with.

Loneliness is a crushing feeling - from experience we find that people just want to be acknowledged & valued.

Yes exactly that! Acknowledged and valued

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Why do people only feel valued if they get sex ?

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By *tirling DarkCouple
over a year ago

Stirling

So do the right thing, tell her you're on here or leave her.

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

"Why do people only feel valued if they get sex ?"

Because modernity has created a series of roles and jobs that offer no value or have homogenised individuals into groups, it is hard to feel special in a world of near 8 Billion souls, to give yourself to someone or have someone give themselves to you is the only measure left of worth.

(Only kidding, it’s because everyone likes a pity fuck, don’t they?)

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

"Why do people only feel valued if they get sex ?"

It's not exactly that, sex is a biological compulsion for some, but isn't it better to do it with someone you actually like? Sex is like food, I need to eat to live but I'm not going to eat from the bin.

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"I think there is a difference between seeking solace from someone’s ears and seeking it in their muff"

An ear muff perhaps?

Jesting badly aside. What this thread shows again is that relationships can be complicated and each has its own dynamics. Clumsy judgement and over simplification, pronouncements from strangers upon other strangers when they expend more mental energy choosing what cereal to eat does nobody any favours. Children, families, finances,housing, health and the tick tock of life all can effect any decisions they wish to make and I think a little more respect should be shown to the parties negotiating their way through these challenges. Life isn't black and white.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I want cake .......

Will there be tea too? Bloody love tea! "

Hello

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"Why do people only feel valued if they get sex ?"

Ask Maslow.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Why do people only feel valued if they get sex ?

You don't need sex to live. It's nice but you won't die from a lack of sex. Lack of love or belonging maybe but never from lack of sex.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

[Removed by poster at 07/10/22 11:55:36]

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By *hakeurlegsMan
over a year ago

everywhere. and nowhere baby

[Removed by poster at 07/10/22 11:56:16]

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ecadent_DevonMan
over a year ago

Okehampton

"I think there is a difference between seeking solace from someone’s ears and seeking it in their muff

An ear muff perhaps?

And I believe that cheating on someone without their knowledge is both controlling and coercive behaviour, essentially, you would put your partner in a box built out of delusion whilst you do whatever you want, if people want to sleep with other people outside their relationship then they should accord their partner the same choice.

Opinions eh?

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

"[Removed by poster at 07/10/22 11:55:36]"

Maslow doesn't mention battery or WiFi either, I think it needs a refresh

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

He does put sex in with intimacy but i'm sticking by what I said.....

No one dies from not getting sex....

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

"He does put sex in with intimacy but i'm sticking by what I said.....

No one dies from not getting sex.... "

I apologise for over simplifying, but hopefully you got the jist of what I was trying to say.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"He does put sex in with intimacy but i'm sticking by what I said.....

No one dies from not getting sex.... "

Don't start going on about how important it is....... I know it is .......

Someone made a shit analogy with food..... that's all.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"He does put sex in with intimacy but i'm sticking by what I said.....

No one dies from not getting sex....

I apologise for over simplifying, but hopefully you got the jist of what I was trying to say."

I did ...... I did ........ I knew what you were aiming at but I disagree anyhoos

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By *hakeurlegsMan
over a year ago

everywhere. and nowhere baby

"So! If a man cheats it's a woman's fault?

First rule of Fab, innit?

If a man cheats (and there’s LOADS of men cheating on Fab

) it’s clearly because he is a bad man.

If a woman cheats (and there’s LOADS of women cheating on Fab

), it’s clearly because her fella is a bad man.

Bang on fella nailed it in one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Finally! Preach. and while we're on Don't forget the cooking and shopping.

Cleaning.

Would it kill you to run a duster round your minge? "

Dyson minge here

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

[Removed by poster at 07/10/22 12:01:11]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I haven’t had sex with my partner for at least 5 years. I am a sexual man who likes kissing and cuddling as well as just getting down and dirty. We don’t even kiss passionately anymore. It’s very frustrating and annoying. I’ve spoken to her about it, if she wanted to go swinging, meet other guys and even if she doesn’t fancy me anymore. Apparently she does fancy and love me, no she doesn’t want other blokes and she’s not up for swinging. I was told to do what I have to do….. I could leave her as a lot have said. She’s not horrible in anyway, she’s lovely otherwise I would have left years ago. It feels like I’m just a cuddle buddy now who gives neck and back rubs and cooks. On a meet I never mention any of this unless asked. It feels like a half life to me so that’s why I personally am on here. Life is not black and white as many say it is, there’s a lot of grey thrown in just for shits and giggles. If I was just a heartless bastard I would be gone. As someone said earlier though, this is only a snippet of my half of the story and hers could be completely different. I have tried the discussion route though and like I said earlier it didn’t seem to get me any closer to understanding what she wanted and the “just do what you have to” while giving me the all clear, still doesn’t solve anything apart from someone else gets my affection and some naughty fun times x

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"[Removed by poster at 07/10/22 11:55:36]

Maslow doesn't mention battery or WiFi either, I think it needs a refresh "

Fuck knows what's going to happen when the power goes out this winter!

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

"He does put sex in with intimacy but i'm sticking by what I said.....

No one dies from not getting sex....

I apologise for over simplifying, but hopefully you got the jist of what I was trying to say.

I did ...... I did ........ I knew what you were aiming at but I disagree anyhoos "

That's OK, you're still cool

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By *elshcouple18Couple
over a year ago

Cardiff

I want cake .......

Will there be tea too? Bloody love tea! "
used to like you, tea breath has put me off now..

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"He does put sex in with intimacy but i'm sticking by what I said.....

No one dies from not getting sex....

I apologise for over simplifying, but hopefully you got the jist of what I was trying to say.

I did ...... I did ........ I knew what you were aiming at but I disagree anyhoos

That's OK, you're still cool"

As are you -

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By *ackbydemandMan
over a year ago

Leicester

"He does put sex in with intimacy but i'm sticking by what I said.....

No one dies from not getting sex....

I apologise for over simplifying, but hopefully you got the jist of what I was trying to say.

I did ...... I did ........ I knew what you were aiming at but I disagree anyhoos

That's OK, you're still cool

As are you -

Awwwww, shucks, you smoothy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh cry me a river! Then they should just leave! "

It's not quite as black and white as that. Having said that I coped for 11 years in a dead marriage and kept my cock exactly where it should be which considering my sex drive was no mean feat. My ex however did not - transpired she even tried it on with my best mate FFS

I coped by focusing on my work and kids. I knew what would happen if we split up and really didn't want what has happened to happen. I was prepared to put my life on hold to try and prevent one of my kids from taking theirs - someone else didn't quite see it that way.

My best mate did the opposite and pretty much fucked anything that moves and anything that didn't move he fucked it til it did then fucked it again

Who is actually qualified say or judge which of us was right? There's not many people don't stand in one glass House or another

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"I think there is a difference between seeking solace from someone’s ears and seeking it in their muff

An ear muff perhaps?

Opinions eh?

Well yes exactly... People's belief systems, culture, values, aspirations... Many things make it a good deal more complicated for some.

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By *ustintime69Man
over a year ago

Bristol

So when you have lived with someone for almost half your life and you realise that you want, and have always wanted more sexually than they do, to the point that sex becomes difficult to achieve and a bit depressing so you tend to avoid it and take yourself in hand where does that take you? A lot of men cheat because it’s just in their overly masculine nature but some men cheat because they are in complex relationships with children, mortgages, etc which (perhaps?) because they are fearful about the future or feel responsible makes them hang on in loveless relationships and seek intimacy elsewhere.

I know couples who have cheated on each other (not always the men btw) who have carried on their married lives but it’s never the same and the anger and fear never goes away.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Couldn’t agree more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So when you have lived with someone for almost half your life and you realise that you want, and have always wanted more sexually than they do, to the point that sex becomes difficult to achieve and a bit depressing so you tend to avoid it and take yourself in hand where does that take you? A lot of men cheat because it’s just in their overly masculine nature but some men cheat because they are in complex relationships with children, mortgages, etc which (perhaps?) because they are fearful about the future or feel responsible makes them hang on in loveless relationships and seek intimacy elsewhere.

I know couples who have cheated on each other (not always the men btw) who have carried on their married lives but it’s never the same and the anger and fear never goes away."

That's one point of view. Would you feel the same way if your other half was insanely jealous and screwed you to the floor with her gaze if you even chatted to someone you were passing by yet she was busy banging anything and anyone that would have her?

It's a very easy shoe to wear if you are the one in the controlling seat with all the excuses lined up - and that is excuses not reasons BTW.. Also I'm not judging - those are just the facts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Communication is key surely. Yes some are being neglected but I imagine that’s not the case for the vast majority, and they just want their cake and to eat it too.

Those who are being neglected, surely therapy to something would be far easier than being deceitful which will end up in heartbreak in the long run.

You are being hurt by being neglected but you’re hurting by cheating.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There is no excuse for cheating a couple sort it. If it can't be sorted they split its that simple.

Agree, any cheat will always justify why they didn’t leave it’s an attempt to lessen their own guilty feelings."

Spot on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally don’t think there’s any justification for cheating, I don’t stand for it and I won’t knowingly meet anyone who does it.

We all judge, it’s human nature to judge, I think when people say “don’t judge” it’s a cop out because they don’t like what they’re hearing, everyone does it and doesn’t even notice half the time.

I know what it feels like to be cheated on so I would never want to be the cause of that pain, hurt, years of self esteem building and the anxiety and trust issues that comes with it.

It’s a terrible thing to do.

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By *otwife and MasterCouple
over a year ago

Derby

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

Wow you just put womens lib back by about thirty years

I find it hard to believe this was written by a woman…

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

Marriages die. But i dont think cheating is the best course of action as it just sours everything. Get therapy, get permission to open the relationship or leave. All viable options. Yes people need physical intimacy and if one side unilaterally removes that, there is a problem that they both need to solve.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Lying and cheating break trust - no doubt about that and once broken, trust is very difficult to build back up. It is a bit like a beautiful ornament that has been damaged, you can glue it back together but there will always be a fine line representing the traumatic event.

I am not condoning cheating and lying and I would never be with anybody who does - not because they are a terrible person with no respect etc, but because I do not want to be part in any secretive affair, so my choice without judging the person who maybe cheating/ lying.

Judging is, in my view, a tad arrogant. It is a form of punishment without knowing the full reasons and the complete narrative for the deed.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Lying and cheating break trust - no doubt about that and once broken, trust is very difficult to build back up. It is a bit like a beautiful ornament that has been damaged, you can glue it back together but there will always be a fine line representing the traumatic event.

Judging is, in my view, a tad arrogant. It is a form of punishment without knowing the full reasons and the complete narrative for the deed."

I actually need to correct myself. It is not arrogance and I also understand those who feel the need to judge - more often than not, a binary, black/white view of a situation and associated judging are rooted in trust issues or experiences of the person who is judging.

We cannot fully escape our own experience in life when looking at somebody else's behaviour is what I was trying to say.

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By *ociable-NottmCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

Judging is, in my view, a tad arrogant. It is a form of punishment without knowing the full reasons and the complete narrative for the deed."

Indeed that fine ornament will never be same again

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By *ociable-NottmCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

*the

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By *eard and TattsCouple
over a year ago

Cwmbran

They're crying out for something

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How come married men are getting all the shit? I'm pretty sure there are married women doing the same.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How come married men are getting all the shit? I'm pretty sure there are married women doing the same."

Cheating is cheating in my opinion regardless of gender.

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By *iss KinkWoman
over a year ago

North West

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

No I think your talking rubbish

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How come married men are getting all the shit? I'm pretty sure there are married women doing the same.

Cheating is cheating in my opinion regardless of gender.

Of course.

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By *ackAgain10123Man
over a year ago

Smallville

If a woman cheats is it a man’s fault?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"How come married men are getting all the shit? I'm pretty sure there are married women doing the same."

The op was about men I suppose but women cheat too. Usually they keep it under the radar on here because they find it easier to get meets

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By *ackAgain10123Man
over a year ago

Smallville

The assumption being that the other side is free of wrong doing, neglect or any form of culpability?

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By *humper.Man
over a year ago

northumberland/scotland

Fuck right off.

Nobody is "driven into the arms" of anyone.

Absolute pish.

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By *ackAgain10123Man
over a year ago

Smallville

Agree, And there are many other ways to develop intimacy!

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By *lym4realCouple
over a year ago

plymouth

We've not got a "Problem" with married or attached males and we respect their honesty BUT it's the ones who are attached and total lack of disrepect for the other "Party or Parties" invovled and despite it being classed as a city Plymland is a small place and so the scene is small and doesn't take that long for the so called "Shit to hit the fan" and have known a fair few innocent people get caught up in a total shit show not of their own making ??? and quite easy to spot them down in here though ..last minute m,eets ...meet up in a carpark ...only can meet during the day ...or working here but saying that we did get caught out afew years ago and quickly backed off ....not worth the shit show or hassle xxx

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"If a woman cheats is it a man’s fault? "

Not their fault. But in a relationship the mans behaviours contribute to whatever decision making process the woman has chosen to arrive at "cheat". It's rarely as simple as being one person's "fault".

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By *hiskeyColaMan
over a year ago

Oswestry

"So! If a man cheats it's a woman's fault?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fuck right off.

Nobody is "driven into the arms" of anyone.

Absolute pish."

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By *moothshaftMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Thank you OP, what a refreshing post.

My explanation for being here is on my profile.

We still get on really well and love each other, but miss that intimacy and the closeness of skin on skin contact.

And being the age I am, it's getting quieter and quieter on here for me.

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

Would I refuse to have sex with a married woman? Nope not my business why she’s on here or out in the pub looking for sex with other men not interested in her home life it would be different if I was thinking of taking it further but just a bit of NSA sex then not my business to be honest

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By *IG G77Man
over a year ago

GATLEY

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

This is true

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By *weetiepie99Woman
over a year ago

cardiff

"Fuck right off.

Nobody is "driven into the arms" of anyone.

Absolute pish."

At last. Some absolute sense.

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By *nvincible ButterflyWoman
over a year ago

LEEDS

If a man isn't getting what he needs at home then he should leave and stop cheating

Or he could talk to her and they agree to be in an open relationship

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By *nvincible ButterflyWoman
over a year ago

LEEDS

And don't blame the wife/other half... no one is to blame for a cheater other than the cheater himself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There seems to be an increasing number of posts and comments on the forums where somehow it must be the woman's fault.

We have no idea why individual chooses to cheat. If things are bad at home they could either deal with the situation or leave, It could also be they are just somebody who cannot be monotonous and is not honest about it to their partner. We are also assuming the woman is withholding sex however there could be very reasons for this.

I don't automatically judge somebody just because they are cheating and assume they are an arsehole however I also do not assume it is the other partner's fault.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

So many "shoulds" and "should nots" on here... how can we be expert about somebody else's narrative, circumstances and options.

The words "should/ shouldn't" really should not be used here

Joke aside, they really are unhelpful.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So many "shoulds" and "should nots" on here... how can we be expert about somebody else's narrative, circumstances and options.

The words "should/ shouldn't" really should not be used here

Joke aside, they really are unhelpful.

Why?

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

I don't automatically judge somebody just because they are cheating and assume they are an arsehole however I also do not assume it is the other partner's fault."

Spot on!

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"So many "shoulds" and "should nots" on here... how can we be expert about somebody else's narrative, circumstances and options.

The words "should/ shouldn't" really should not be used here

Joke aside, they really are unhelpful.

Why? "

They do not help the person who is "cheating" nor the person who is at the receiving end.

They imply blame and moral judgment with an assumed authority which is also not helpful.

They say so much more about the person who uses them than about the person they are judging in my opinion.

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By *ts the taking part thatMan
over a year ago

southampton

"Yes there are lots of married men on here that are looking for sex. Yes that true.

However there is a lot of them that are crying out to be listen to and some kind of intimacy. That there are not getting at home

You have to ask you self why are the wife's and other half's doing this to them

Some get court out then shit hits the fan the who family upset. The man is made out to be the bad one even tho the other half of this relantionship hasnt be near the other half in years

men have needs

I know its not always the case

But these men are being driven into anther woman's arm's

Do you all think Im right?

You have very valid point but too many aggressive people on here to consider it.

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Therapy is probably a better idea

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

"So many "shoulds" and "should nots" on here... how can we be expert about somebody else's narrative, circumstances and options.

The words "should/ shouldn't" really should not be used here

Joke aside, they really are unhelpful.

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Therapy is probably a better idea"

Absolutely - but that requires the persons involved to recognise that need.

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

I don't automatically judge somebody just because they are cheating and assume they are an arsehole however I also do not assume it is the other partner's fault."

The latter point when used as an excuse or the reason why, more often by some men and less so than by women is awful..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a man isn't getting what he needs at home then he should leave and stop cheating

Or he could talk to her and they agree to be in an open relationship "

Things are never that simple and black and white

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