FabSwingers.com forum: Expectations.....

By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

What are your expectations of Fabs? When and how do you know you are happy with what you are getting out of being on here?

I am wondering this as I have seen quite a few "rants" recently and maybe this is sometimes about having unrealistic expectations?

I know what I expect from here ...

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Your not expecting me! I'm expecting to have a laugh on the fora, meet new people (as well as some older ones) and have sex.

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Your not expecting me! I'm expecting to have a laugh on the fora, meet new people (as well as some older ones) and have sex.

"
Says who? lol... You cant tell me what to expect

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I think sometimes people just 'snap' and have to offload. I know if I've been stood up I'd love to just have a rant about it but know I'll get 35 messages from men saying 'I'd never stand you up hun', 20 messages saying 'did you cam first?', and maybe 2 messages showing sympathy. So I just leave it.

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"I think sometimes people just 'snap' and have to offload. I know if I've been stood up I'd love to just have a rant about it but know I'll get 35 messages from men saying 'I'd never stand you up hun', 20 messages saying 'did you cam first?', and maybe 2 messages showing sympathy. So I just leave it."
Spot on... so no point really having a rant. Actually it might be better to just share that kind of frustration privately with another forumite... ?

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"I think sometimes people just 'snap' and have to offload. I know if I've been stood up I'd love to just have a rant about it but know I'll get 35 messages from men saying 'I'd never stand you up hun', 20 messages saying 'did you cam first?', and maybe 2 messages showing sympathy. So I just leave it.Spot on... so no point really having a rant. Actually it might be better to just share that kind of frustration privately with another forumite... ? "

Nah, the don't want to hear of my meet woes. Anyway, most of my friendslist are blokes so would just say 'why didn't you arrange to meet me?'

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"I think sometimes people just 'snap' and have to offload. I know if I've been stood up I'd love to just have a rant about it but know I'll get 35 messages from men saying 'I'd never stand you up hun', 20 messages saying 'did you cam first?', and maybe 2 messages showing sympathy. So I just leave it.Spot on... so no point really having a rant. Actually it might be better to just share that kind of frustration privately with another forumite... ?

Nah, the don't want to hear of my meet woes. Anyway, most of my friendslist are blokes so would just say 'why didn't you arrange to meet me?'

"
Fair enough lol... so... why dont you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm no stranger to voicing my opinion on what peoples expectations are or their preferences.What I dont like is people moaning that one particular group claiming that because they dont have their expectations met ,that means they can then generalize other members in a negative way.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"I think sometimes people just 'snap' and have to offload. I know if I've been stood up I'd love to just have a rant about it but know I'll get 35 messages from men saying 'I'd never stand you up hun', 20 messages saying 'did you cam first?', and maybe 2 messages showing sympathy. So I just leave it.Spot on... so no point really having a rant. Actually it might be better to just share that kind of frustration privately with another forumite... ?

Nah, the don't want to hear of my meet woes. Anyway, most of my friendslist are blokes so would just say 'why didn't you arrange to meet me?'

Fair enough lol... so... why dont you?

I did try that once. Put up a meet request and updated my status along the lines of 'free now for a shag' and messaged some of my friendslist. They were all busy. *sigh*

Now I just take what I can get and hope to god they turn up.

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By *opsy RogersWoman
over a year ago

London

I expected exactly what I'm getting. Mostly, it's some fantastic times at parties and clubs, some wonderful meets with lots of single men, most of whom I'm still in contact with and quite a few laughs and giggles. I have people who I now call friends too.

I've met some very interesting, clever and funny folk and my confidence is at an all time high.

I've even expected the stupid, rude and inadequate I've been contacted by but they are by far the minority.

Swinging rocks!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't expect anything.

I know what I would like but then again, what I would like is also dynamic.

What I want today might not be what I want tomorrow.

I am content to sit back, absorb and occasionally add to the content of some of the threads.

As a bi-product (no pun intended) of me being here, I very occasionally also get to meet some like minded people.

That is a bonus and certainly not an expectation.

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

I expect to be idolised and adored.

PUT ME ON A PEDESTAL YOU BASTARDS!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What are your expectations of Fabs? When and how do you know you are happy with what you are getting out of being on here?

I am wondering this as I have seen quite a few "rants" recently and maybe this is sometimes about having unrealistic expectations?

I know what I expect from here ...

You should read a thread from the archives 'the expectation and the reality'. A women called Sausage Jockey wrote it approx 18 mths ago. It's still the best one I've seen that gives a story from just a womens perspective. Unfortunately she's no longer on the site.

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"I don't expect anything.

I know what I would like but then again, what I would like is also dynamic.

What I want today might not be what I want tomorrow.

I like that! My preferences have changed a few times and probably continue to do so!

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"What are your expectations of Fabs? When and how do you know you are happy with what you are getting out of being on here?

I am wondering this as I have seen quite a few "rants" recently and maybe this is sometimes about having unrealistic expectations?

I know what I expect from here ...

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"What are your expectations of Fabs? When and how do you know you are happy with what you are getting out of being on here?

I am wondering this as I have seen quite a few "rants" recently and maybe this is sometimes about having unrealistic expectations?

I know what I expect from here ...

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

DOes anybody know how to find that old thread, please? I am hopeless trying to find old threads...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's is Swinging Support and Advice forum. Just bumped it.

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"It's is Swinging Support and Advice forum. Just bumped it. "

Thanks, Blackspice - I just read it and it made me want to laugh and cry for all the right reasons. Thanks for bumping this - it is a great piece to read and, by the sound of it, a great shame that said lady is no longer on this site.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's is Swinging Support and Advice forum. Just bumped it. "
Just found it and read it before you bumped it

Aren't I clever...

Have to say that, having read it (and wish she was still on here as it was easily the most erudite 'rant' I have read in the Fora) that it bears out my/our approach which is NO expectations tied with - crucially - NO assumptions either.

Maybe I am just an old cynic, but when I was 'doing the rounds' as a single guy only 3 years ago, I never went into a meet expecting anything (despite how horny the conversation had got beforehand) and I certainly never went into one assuming everything I had been told, seen or been lead to believe was true.. saved a lot of let-downs, I know that for certain....

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

"It's is Swinging Support and Advice forum. Just bumped it.

Its so close to my experiences too.

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"It's is Swinging Support and Advice forum. Just bumped it. Just found it and read it before you bumped it

Aren't I clever...

"
I am not even sure whether it is being a cynic... I think if you have high expectations of others you are setting yourself up for disappointment in life in general. Expect no more than you are able to give yourself, in fact perhaps expect less... is where I am coming from. Does that make sense?

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"I expect to be idolised and adored.

PUT ME ON A PEDESTAL YOU BASTARDS!!!"
Holy mackerel... I forget and left you on that pedestal.... you must be getting really cold up there?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's is Swinging Support and Advice forum. Just bumped it. Just found it and read it before you bumped it

Aren't I clever...

I am not even sure whether it is being a cynic... I think if you have high expectations of others you are setting yourself up for disappointment in life in general. Expect no more than you are able to give yourself, in fact perhaps expect less... is where I am coming from. Does that make sense?

Absolutely. I think you've encapsulated the Buddhist _iew of Swinging...

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

I have no expectations on here.... I don't expect to find love on here.. I don't expect to find the perfect meet.. I just got with the flow...

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"It's is Swinging Support and Advice forum. Just bumped it. Just found it and read it before you bumped it

Aren't I clever...

Absolutely. I think you've encapsulated the Buddhist _iew of Swinging...

"
Pork.... is that REALLY you? YEAH! Never thought of it that way but it is how I feel about life and everything that comes with it.

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"I have no expectations on here.... I don't expect to find love on here.. I don't expect to find the perfect meet.. I just got with the flow..."
Healthy stance!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have no expectations on here.... I don't expect to find love on here.. I don't expect to find the perfect meet.. I just got with the flow..."

but ur hoover sucks i thought..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just want sex, don't think that is a hight expectation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We expected to find likeminded people but with very different _iews and we weren't disappointed.

We thought we'd perhaps find some people who we had some common ground with and who we initially found 'interesting' and we certainly have.

I hoped we'd get to know them a bit better and perhaps find out that we wanted similar things and desires - once again we have.

I dared to dream that we'd then move on from there and get into the naughty side of things - which hasn't happened yet but looks like it will do soon.

So as far as I'm concerned, we've well exceeded our expectations and really enjoyed being on here for all of the above reasons - not just the final one.

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"I just want sex, don't think that is a hight expectation

Depends how often, how much, in what format and with whom lol...;-)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's is Swinging Support and Advice forum. Just bumped it. Just found it and read it before you bumped it

Aren't I clever...

Expectations don't have to be high

But everyone joins the site for a reason and must expect to get something from it

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"We expected to find likeminded people but with very different _iews and we weren't disappointed.

We thought we'd perhaps find some people who we had some common ground with and who we initially found 'interesting' and we certainly have.

I hoped we'd get to know them a bit better and perhaps find out that we wanted similar things and desires - once again we have.

I dared to dream that we'd then move on from there and get into the naughty side of things - which hasn't happened yet but looks like it will do soon.

So as far as I'm concerned, we've well exceeded our expectations and really enjoyed being on here for all of the above reasons - not just the final one. "

Nice profile

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just want sex, don't think that is a hight expectation

u hightist!

sorry coulnt resist

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just want sex, don't think that is a hight expectation

u hightist!

sorry coulnt resist"

Sat on the bus going home

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Expectations don't have to be high

But everyone joins the site for a reason and must expect to get something from it"
True - and I guess some people get more easily frustrated than others when they find theirs are not met.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We expected to find likeminded people but with very different _iews and we weren't disappointed.

We thought we'd perhaps find some people who we had some common ground with and who we initially found 'interesting' and we certainly have.

I hoped we'd get to know them a bit better and perhaps find out that we wanted similar things and desires - once again we have.

I dared to dream that we'd then move on from there and get into the naughty side of things - which hasn't happened yet but looks like it will do soon.

So as far as I'm concerned, we've well exceeded our expectations and really enjoyed being on here for all of the above reasons - not just the final one.

Nice profile

Thankyou - very kind to say so.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's is Swinging Support and Advice forum. Just bumped it.

You're welcome, it took me three seperate threads to respond with a 'single guys' version! There still hasn't been a couples version of that thread done.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What are your expectations of Fabs? When and how do you know you are happy with what you are getting out of being on here?

I am wondering this as I have seen quite a few "rants" recently and maybe this is sometimes about having unrealistic expectations?

I know what I expect from here ...

I was 'expecting' to meet women for sex; now I'm just 'hoping' to ...if hope fails, I'll resort to dreaming about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No expectations just going with the flow its been good can't complain. Only thing that annoys me is all my interest never seems to be local.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think sometimes people just 'snap' and have to offload. I know if I've been stood up I'd love to just have a rant about it but know I'll get 35 messages from men saying 'I'd never stand you up hun', 20 messages saying 'did you cam first?', and maybe 2 messages showing sympathy. So I just leave it.Spot on... so no point really having a rant. Actually it might be better to just share that kind of frustration privately with another forumite... ? "

Oh I go in the Chartroom and have a right good rant on cam lol usually ends up a good laugh and everyone probably had be pegged as a nutcase but better out than in

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

we expected the unexpected..

however despite our expectations (not great either)..

it has been pretty much as we expected..

fun though..

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"we expected the unexpected..

however despite our expectations (not great either)..

it has been pretty much as we expected..

fun though.."
I d subscribe to that, Mister

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

"we expected the unexpected..

however despite our expectations (not great either)..

it has been pretty much as we expected..

fun though..I d subscribe to that, Mister

you do!?

i dont even understand it lol..

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"we expected the unexpected..

however despite our expectations (not great either)..

it has been pretty much as we expected..

fun though..I d subscribe to that, Mister

you do!?

i dont even understand it lol..

Thats the beauty...

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

I expected NSA and that is what I get. Simples.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's is Swinging Support and Advice forum. Just bumped it. Just found it and read it before you bumped it

Aren't I clever...

Absolutely. I think you've encapsulated the Buddhist _iew of Swinging...

Pork.... is that REALLY you? YEAH! Never thought of it that way but it is how I feel about life and everything that comes with it.

"
Now you're not keeping up with Minxie's Xmas Character list, are you.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get immense satisfaction from not just experiencing fantastic sex but also the social element too. We've all made good friends on here and I'm sure you will agree that it's so refreshing to be able to engage in conversation openly during a meet or even if it's a coffee with friends and no play..

Not forgetting all you splendid Forumites who are invaluable on occassions

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"It's is Swinging Support and Advice forum. Just bumped it. Just found it and read it before you bumped it

Aren't I clever...

Absolutely. I think you've encapsulated the Buddhist _iew of Swinging...

Pork.... is that REALLY you? YEAH! Never thought of it that way but it is how I feel about life and everything that comes with it.

Now you're not keeping up with Minxie's Xmas Character list, are you.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

U mean I now have to think as well as everything else ............. god this is getting complicated now ........ u sure I can't just wiggle along as I do now????? pleeeeeze

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I expect to be idolised and adored.

PUT ME ON A PEDESTAL YOU BASTARDS!!!"

There's one in my WC.

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"U mean I now have to think as well as everything else ............. god this is getting complicated now ........ u sure I can't just wiggle along as I do now????? pleeeeeze

"
Just you use any of your talents

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"U mean I now have to think as well as everything else ............. god this is getting complicated now ........ u sure I can't just wiggle along as I do now????? pleeeeeze

Just you use any of your talents

fank u

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"U mean I now have to think as well as everything else ............. god this is getting complicated now ........ u sure I can't just wiggle along as I do now????? pleeeeeze

Just you use any of your talents

fank u

"
No, I am serious. You have so many talents...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

FAB enables me to make friends with like-minded people, as well as to find playmates for NSA fun when it suits me.

It has served me well for the past 3+ years, and I hope it will continue to serve me well for many more to come.

IMHO, it helps that I have a busy life outside FAB, and sex is not high on the list of life's priorities. I certainly do not live my life through FAB or other social networking sites!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"U mean I now have to think as well as everything else ............. god this is getting complicated now ........ u sure I can't just wiggle along as I do now????? pleeeeeze

Just you use any of your talents

fank u

No, I am serious. You have so many talents...

Am now wondering which ones are springing to mind lol

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By *mileyBWoman
over a year ago

Northwood

I do think expectations have a lot to do with it, and just whole lack of normal human compassion, understanding and niceness. Treating people like disposable fucking machines and toys isn not OK.

A lot is said about this aformentioned group 'the timewasters' and yes this has happened to me, but in my opinion, a lot of the time, people just get genuinely scared off, and back out due to nerves and fear that it won't all turn out well.

We should all be nicer to each other, and we may find, we have a better time and have better meets.

The site is what YOU make of it, a positive and humanistic attitude is required that's all.

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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

The site is what YOU make of it, a positive and humanistic attitude is required that's all.

"
That is what I believe - and if I had a bad experience, like a no show or something or somebody not quite being what they said they are.... well, I would just move on.

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