FabSwingers.com forum: The item nearest...

By *ickshawed OP Couple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

The item nearest your left hand is what you're fighting off the zombie hordes with/indulging in sexy time tonight with. Take your pick.

Mine is a white fluffy blanket embroidered with ducks. I guess I could use it as a shield against a zombie or bite on it to stay quiet in the throes of passion

How about you?

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Pure radio..its heavy enough to do some damage

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mid-size terrier

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An empty Cherry Coke bottle

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By *tooveMan
over a year ago

belfast

My cock. Unfortunately.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bubble bath

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By *ickshawed OP Couple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"My cock. Unfortunately. "

I'm sure the zombies will love it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Headphones, at least something will be getting muffled.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A cushion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The window and the sea it is then

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By *ickshawed OP Couple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"The window and the sea it is then "

Not overly erotic, but could definitely come in handy against that zombie horde

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By *tooveMan
over a year ago

belfast

"My cock. Unfortunately.

I'm sure the zombies will love it

They'll not get much eating from it.

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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

I'll be using my mouse like a rope dart. Failing that I'll point the laser optic at them instead whilst I find my pool cue that un screws...

A rope dart looks like this:-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WozbZMljRiM

Other than that I'll have to take my boxer trunks & throw them at them!!!?????

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

A set of wheelchair wheels with gecko grip on the pushrims

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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

"I'll be using my mouse like a rope dart. Failing that I'll point the laser optic at them instead whilst I find my pool cue that un screws...

A rope dart looks like this:-

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WozbZMljRiM

Other than that I'll have to take my boxer trunks & throw them at them!!!?????

Under crackers martial arts to asphyxiate them then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Mine is a mouse mat not sure what I would do with that ?????

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

A plastic bottle.

Both sexy times and zombie apocalypse aaait!

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"An empty Cherry Coke bottle"

Snap!

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By *eneralKenobiMan
over a year ago

North Angus

Bottle of water, at least I won’t go thirsty

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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

"Mine is a mouse mat not sure what I would do with that ?????"

Cover in turps & shove it up their bums & light?

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By *ickshawed OP Couple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"Mine is a mouse mat not sure what I would do with that ?????

Cover in turps & shove it up their bums & light?

Is that meant for the zombies or sexy time?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"An empty Cherry Coke bottle

Snap!"

Plot twist: Keyser is her other half!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A glass of wine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My phone, or a sleeping cat.

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By *r SproutMan
over a year ago

the middle

A hand towel

Can someone please delete my browser history

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A desktop fan. Not much use against zombies but can cool a girl down afterwards.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Avocado stone

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By *yronMan
over a year ago

grangemouth

A glaive.

I'm a reenactor and I was polishing it.

*ahem*

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A phone charger, should come in handy as a garrote for the zombies and a whip for the sexy time

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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

A mouse mat that I can frisbee at them

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

A loofah, those zombie's are going to get some serious back exfoliation!

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"An empty Cherry Coke bottle

Snap!

Plot twist: Keyser is her other half! "

Shhhh...blabbermouth

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By *o scandalousWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"The item nearest your left hand is what you're fighting off the zombie hordes with/indulging in sexy time tonight with. Take your pick.

Mine is a white fluffy blanket embroidered with ducks. I guess I could use it as a shield against a zombie or bite on it to stay quiet in the throes of passion

How about you?

I’ve got a bagpuss lavender wheat heat pad thingy. Maybe the smell would confuse them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A desk mouse. Don't ask what it's doing near my left hand

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Assuming we're not talking about the phone I'm typing on, I'll be fighting those zombies with a ring binder containing training notes on rope rescue systems

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

2 cats...

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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Beds (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)

2 remote controls ... maybe not much use against zombies

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By *leasures4Couple
over a year ago

East midlands

An old 70’s hifi. Chunky and very heavy. Should do some damage.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"2 remote controls ... maybe not much use against zombies

Distract 'em by getting them to measure their penis with them.

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By *iceButtSlimMan
over a year ago

somewhere

When reading the opening post it was a pint of beer, think I'd have to wait until I finished the pint before I fended a zombie off first though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A bottle of rum…. I guess I’m running then, because this is coming with me and I bet I don’t spill a drop.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A corkscrew. The waiter’s kind with the small knife. If I’m going to survive a Zombie attack it’s going to get bloody!

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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Beds (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)

"2 remote controls ... maybe not much use against zombies

Distract 'em by getting them to measure their penis with them."

... ooo yes, good point

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My phone it’s in my left hand

I am safe as it’s a brick ha ha

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By *lowercandyWoman
over a year ago

Lancashire

"A desk mouse. Don't ask what it's doing near my left hand

I actually read that as dead mouse

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By *ORBCouple
over a year ago

Dundalk

A pillow. Great,it looks like I'm losing out to the zombies on that one

.Bo.

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By *ickshawed OP Couple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"2 remote controls ... maybe not much use against zombies

Distract 'em by getting them to measure their penis with them."

Genius

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"2 remote controls ... maybe not much use against zombies

Distract 'em by getting them to measure their penis with them.

Genius

I'll take that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My dressing gown lol

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By *asual_WandererWoman
over a year ago

A spot you want me

A house plant...

Oh no I lie. A half eaten packet of Halls throat sweets

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By *handlerMonicaCouple
over a year ago

Leicester

I have an empty glass of g&t. Guess I could take the lemon slices out, and squirt the juice in their eyes.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Headphones, at least something will be getting muffled."

pop round I'll do that

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