FabSwingers.com forum: Question...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

..my ex is being difficult about getting my stuff back that I left at his. Why? I've offered to go and get it, he said he'll drop the stuff off but is dodging arranging a time with me.

One item is my favourite bikini. Its the only one I have that's fits really well and I like.

Whys he being difficult!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because he’s an ex! Sometimes it’s the only thing left after you split up… to just be able to frustrate your ex

Say you’ll collect on a set date unless he drops it off sooner?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't get this.

It happened to my friend earlier this year. She couldn't get her stuff back so went round when she knew he was in.

Only thing I could figure was that he was desperately trying to keep her in his life somehow. Prolonging the contact to hopefully find a way back in.

It's a dick move. Hope you get it back.

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

Because he also likes your bikini and use to wear it when you weren't around.

On a serious note... Maybe it just because it's hard for him to let go; whilst your stuff remains in his place, there's a glimmey of hope you'll come back; when you take it all back, that hope is lost and he has to face the reality that you've gone for good.

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Bliss

To have control of a situation

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'll give it one more shot to see if he arranges a time with me, then he can keep it.

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

Wash that bikini if you get it back

Don’t ask me why I know. But trust me. Wash it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

One of my exes chopped up his exes furniture - chest of drawers etc - and left it on the drive for her to pick up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll give it one more shot to see if he arranges a time with me, then he can keep it. "

And stick to it.

He sounds like an asshole.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'll give it one more shot to see if he arranges a time with me, then he can keep it. "

That would be unfortunate but at the same time it's going to be a mental load you can deal without. Don't play his games.

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

A touch of resentment and hurt. He probably thinks that he’s showing that you’re not his priority anymore, in reality he’s just being a bit petty, which happens when there’s hurt involved.

If it’s nothing that you can live without, then just let it go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To have control of a situation"

This.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would rather not have to deal with an ex and his shit & nonsense over an item of my clothing.

Cut your losses with your fav bikini and look forward to buying a gorgeous replacement.

NBVN x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just go to his a time you know he'll be in to get your stuff dint even say that way he'll not know it's you at the door.

The only other option is forget about your things pit it down to experience and buy yourself an even better bikini.

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By *oudBeSurprisedMan
over a year ago

Fife

[Removed by poster at 02/09/22 09:11:17]

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By *oudBeSurprisedMan
over a year ago

Fife

When leaving your bikini is harder than leaving your boyfriend.

He has probably binned all your stuff and moved on but doesn't want the drama after telling you.

Get yourself a new bikini.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Stop asking. If he's doing it to maintain contact it's failed if it's to exert control it's failed. Even if you don't get it back you've brought the chapter to a close.

I feel a certain sympathy for him if he's hurting but you both have to get on with your lives.

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

"One of my exes chopped up his exes furniture - chest of drawers etc - and left it on the drive for her to pick up

Gratuitously damaging other peoples stuff is a truly pathetic thing to do.

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By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

"To have control of a situation"

This. Last bit of control he has over you. Go with a friend to his to pick it up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just start posting pictures of yourself in your ‘new bikini’ on face book.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"When leaving your bikini is harder than leaving your boyfriend.

He has probably binned all your stuff and moved on but doesn't want the drama after telling you.

Get yourself a new bikini. "

Um excuse me, you have no idea.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Ps I'm still waiting for photos I asked my ex for over 40 years ago...

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"One of my exes chopped up his exes furniture - chest of drawers etc - and left it on the drive for her to pick up

Gratuitously damaging other peoples stuff is a truly pathetic thing to do."

A colleague of mine chopped her husband's best shirt up and posted it to him when he asked her to send it. He went back to her, whether it was to avoid buying a whole new wardrobe we'll never know

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

It’s a control thing.

Send a message to say you don’t want it and they’ll respond offering it to you. Dangling a carrot.

The bikini will now become synonymous with the break-up and it suddenly won’t feel like your favourite.

Walk away, buy a new bikini and use that to start a new chapter

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Ps I'm still waiting for photos I asked my ex for over 40 years ago..."

Hope these weren't naked photos

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ps I'm still waiting for photos I asked my ex for over 40 years ago..."

Maybe they’re digitalising them for you. Think possitive.

. ..

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Up Your Frock!

"..my ex is being difficult about getting my stuff back that I left at his. Why? I've offered to go and get it, he said he'll drop the stuff off but is dodging arranging a time with me.

One item is my favourite bikini. Its the only one I have that's fits really well and I like.

Whys he being difficult!"

Probably feels hurt about the break up and thinks it’s something that will bother you so is doing anything he can to make your life a bit harder. I think you should just make the clean break and not give him that control. Buy a new one exactly the same and wear that instead xx.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Ps I'm still waiting for photos I asked my ex for over 40 years ago...

Maybe they’re digitalising them for you. Think possitive.

. .. "

I doubt that very much.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Ps I'm still waiting for photos I asked my ex for over 40 years ago...

Hope these weren't naked photos "

no!

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Up Your Frock!

"Ps I'm still waiting for photos I asked my ex for over 40 years ago..."

Are they the ones if you pretending to be lady Godiva - naked horseback riding through Swindon town centre and the horse has a cornetto on its head as it’s supposed to be a unicorn?? - not seen them!!!

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

[Removed by poster at 02/09/22 09:52:56]

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Ps I'm still waiting for photos I asked my ex for over 40 years ago...

They are! How did you know. My only regret is that my hair was very short and the saddle was very erm rough

. That Cornetto melted though

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

He wants what he's lost.

He wants know where you live.

He likes your texts.

He likes bikinis or other stuff you've left.

He planned a holiday and seeing you in le-bikini so is wondering whether to take it or persuade you into going.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Write the stuff off and sever ties.

I’m brutal and cold about that kinda stuff.

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By *ananaman41Man
over a year ago

Dublin

"I'll give it one more shot to see if he arranges a time with me, then he can keep it.

And stick to it.

He sounds like an asshole.

Remember as with all things in life, there are 2 sides to every story

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Up Your Frock!

"Ps I'm still waiting for photos I asked my ex for over 40 years ago...

They are! How did you know. My only regret is that my hair was very short and the saddle was very erm rough

. That Cornetto melted though

Lucky guess…

If you fancy recreating that moment I can upgrade the cornetto to a ‘pussyblaster mk3 - Juggernaut 14 inch dildo’ no one will Mess with the unicorn with that on its head!!! - just say the word xx

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

Crumpet Castle

"..my ex is being difficult about getting my stuff back that I left at his. Why? I've offered to go and get it, he said he'll drop the stuff off but is dodging arranging a time with me.

One item is my favourite bikini. Its the only one I have that's fits really well and I like.

Whys he being difficult!"

Why are you even bothering trying to get stuff back e.g. a bikini?

Give your head some peace. Then again , there are those that would rather have a drama......

You choose.

It's not an iron lung he's holding onto.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"..my ex is being difficult about getting my stuff back that I left at his. Why? I've offered to go and get it, he said he'll drop the stuff off but is dodging arranging a time with me.

One item is my favourite bikini. Its the only one I have that's fits really well and I like.

Whys he being difficult!"

Has he moved a new girlfriend in and he doesn't want you to meet?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"..my ex is being difficult about getting my stuff back that I left at his. Why? I've offered to go and get it, he said he'll drop the stuff off but is dodging arranging a time with me.

One item is my favourite bikini. Its the only one I have that's fits really well and I like.

Whys he being difficult!

Why are you even bothering trying to get stuff back e.g. a bikini?

Give your head some peace. Then again , there are those that would rather have a drama......

You choose.

It's not an iron lung he's holding onto."

I don't want a drama. He's got more of my clothes than just a bikini but I wanted that for this weekend.

It's not unreasonable to ask people to be adult about these things.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"..my ex is being difficult about getting my stuff back that I left at his. Why? I've offered to go and get it, he said he'll drop the stuff off but is dodging arranging a time with me.

One item is my favourite bikini. Its the only one I have that's fits really well and I like.

Whys he being difficult!

Has he moved a new girlfriend in and he doesn't want you to meet?"

Maybe. He said he drop it off to me a few days ago but didn't, so if he wanted to avoid me seeing a new girlfriend there are ways around it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'll just go naked instead

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By *eamworkboyMan
over a year ago

Irvine

He's exerting his last bit of control over you, set a day and time, take a friend and tell him you're coming to collect your things.

Good luck

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By *oudBeSurprisedMan
over a year ago

Fife

"When leaving your bikini is harder than leaving your boyfriend.

He has probably binned all your stuff and moved on but doesn't want the drama after telling you.

Get yourself a new bikini.

Um excuse me, you have no idea. "

Presumptious of you to think that

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By *angerous123Man
over a year ago

Leeds

Because its the last bit of control and potential contact he has with you

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