FabSwingers.com forum: Screwfix

By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

Turns out their helpline does not deal with questions regarding sexual techniques with ‘helpful hints and tips ‘

What other places aren’t what they seem???

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Kentucky Fried Chicken does not come from Kentucky

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Kentucky Fried Chicken does not come from Kentucky

See!! - these people Just Lie!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Crocodile Dundee wasn’t filmed in Scotland

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

Slim fast - doesn’t make you thin quickly

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Crocodile Dundee wasn’t filmed in Scotland "

or the Sequels… repeat offenders!!

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

At a slight tangent. I once called a 'help and advice' line. The nice lady I spoke to told me

"I'm sorry, we don't give advice".

I was momentarily speechless

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Slim fast - doesn’t make you thin quickly

Nice with chips and a burger though!!

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

"What other places aren’t what they seem??? "

Skegness.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Slim fast - doesn’t make you thin quickly

According to my mate it makes you walk very fast to the loo

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By *ryandseeMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire

Sunny scunny is not always sunny

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"What other places aren’t what they seem???

Skegness."

Apparently got its name from the fact that the Loch Ness monster used to holiday there regularly!!

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By *he Artful TodgerMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire but travel

Shortbread is not a bread – It’s a biscuit

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

Marx and spencers aren't left wing aristocrats

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By *he Artful TodgerMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire but travel

And another:

The funny bone is not a bone – it is the spot where the ulnar nerve touches the humerus…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Toolstation does not have any track, platforms or trains

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"And another:

The funny bone is not a bone – it is the spot where the ulnar nerve touches the humerus…

Humerus - named after the first greek professional comedian…and also a cloud formation - if Im not mistaken!

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Toolstation does not have any track, platforms or trains "

Credit has to be given to the amount of Tools that work there I guess

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"Slim fast - doesn’t make you thin quickly

According to my mate it makes you walk very fast to the loo

I think your mate is right

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Slim fast - doesn’t make you thin quickly

According to my mate it makes you walk very fast to the loo

I think your mate is right

Xls medical that fat binding pill makes you sprint - especially if you have hayfever… in fact just give in sneeze and shit liquid oil simultaneously futile trying to make it toma loo …

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Slim fast - doesn’t make you thin quickly

According to my mate it makes you walk very fast to the loo

I think your mate is right

Xls medical that fat binding pill makes you sprint - especially if you have hayfever… in fact just give in sneeze and shit liquid oil simultaneously futile trying to make it toma loo …

I read a highly amusing account written by a woman who used these. Apparently it all leaked out as she sat at her desk

. She wasn't laughing at the time

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Slim fast - doesn’t make you thin quickly

According to my mate it makes you walk very fast to the loo

I think your mate is right

Xls medical that fat binding pill makes you sprint - especially if you have hayfever… in fact just give in sneeze and shit liquid oil simultaneously futile trying to make it toma loo …

I read a highly amusing account written by a woman who used these. Apparently it all leaked out as she sat at her desk

. She wasn't laughing at the time"

Til the oil light Came on in the car - result!!!

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By *he Artful TodgerMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire but travel

This topics taken a turn for the worse, maybe screw fix supply bungs that might assist…?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Currys - apparently can only get breadmakers, not bhunas.

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Currys - apparently can only get breadmakers, not bhunas."

I shall write to head office…. Watchdog… anyone!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The Dyson Ball cleaner is irresponsibly named as A+E can confirm.

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"The Dyson Ball cleaner is irresponsibly named as A+E can confirm."

Pmsl

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By *idlandiaMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Asking to buy one gets you barred from virgin megastores.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Top Gear don't review the best quality drugs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you are a cannibal, I would give Toby Carvery's a miss.

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Top Gear don't review the best quality drugs

Hahahaha that guy in white is a bit of a helmet!!!

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Turns out their helpline does not deal with questions regarding sexual techniques with ‘helpful hints and tips ‘

What other places aren’t what they seem??? "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Top Gear don't review the best quality drugs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Turns out their helpline does not deal with questions regarding sexual techniques with ‘helpful hints and tips ‘

What other places aren’t what they seem??? "

You needed screwchicks not screwfix

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"The Dyson Ball cleaner is irresponsibly named as A+E can confirm."

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Turns out their helpline does not deal with questions regarding sexual techniques with ‘helpful hints and tips ‘

What other places aren’t what they seem???

You needed screwchicks not screwfix

"
they sound like a first class outfit… is it a volunteer organisation?

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By *eliz NelsonMan
over a year ago

The Tantric Tea Shop

Newcastle!! Its not...the castle is really old!!

Bouncy castles! They're new...time for a name change???

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Newcastle!! Its not...the castle is really old!!

Bouncy castles! They're new...time for a name change???"
I fully support this!!!!

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By *he Artful TodgerMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire but travel

A shooting star is not a star – it is a metorite

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

Selfridges…. No they bloody don’t!!! Confusingly Currys sell fridges and Selfridges sell Curries - the world gone mad!!!

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

Passed a Shop called Rimmers….. banned from there!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Isnt that what fab used to be called

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hate to reveal that Boots doesn't sell any

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

"Turns out their helpline does not deal with questions regarding sexual techniques with ‘helpful hints and tips ‘

What other places aren’t what they seem??? "

They also don't actually fix screws, I took a stripped out Philips head in and the bastards wouldn't repair it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Superdrug ? what a let down !

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

World Of Leather is quite big, but not 510 million square kilometres

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"I hate to reveal that Boots doesn't sell any"

And another thing apropo of boots

Tenna ladies don't cost a tenna but to be fair I did in my research find some for 10.50

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

River Island is neither a river or an island.

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

Smeg fridges, fortunately... except the cheese box obviously.

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

Bob a Job week

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By *orthmanMan
over a year ago

Kendal

I took my horse and its loose shoe to Smiths but they refused to reattach it.

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

Iceland….. nowhere near!!

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

"Toolstation does not have any track, platforms or trains "

The do sell platforms, to stand on when reaching ceiling lights, which sometimes need tracks.

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By *orthmanMan
over a year ago

Kendal

Admittedly not a place, but Northern Rail is not a railway company. It is a mobile comedy club.

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By *orthmanMan
over a year ago

Kendal

"Admittedly not a place, but Northern Rail is not a railway company. It is a mobile comedy club."

On second thoughts, it is mostly an immobile comedy club.

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

[Removed by poster at 05/09/22 00:23:32]

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"Admittedly not a place, but Northern Rail is not a railway company. It is a mobile comedy club.

On second thoughts, it is mostly an immobile comedy club."

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By *odgerMoore OP Man
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Admittedly not a place, but Northern Rail is not a railway company. It is a mobile comedy club.

On second thoughts, it is mostly an immobile comedy club.

Where most Of the comedians vote on whether to turn up or not?

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By *orthmanMan
over a year ago

Kendal

"Admittedly not a place, but Northern Rail is not a railway company. It is a mobile comedy club.

On second thoughts, it is mostly an immobile comedy club.

Where most Of the comedians vote on whether to turn up or not?

Yeah.It's more sit down than stand up.

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By *inkyfun2013Couple
over a year ago

lewisham

"Toolstation does not have any track, platforms or trains "

Southeast Trains often doesn't have any trains either. So what's your point?

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By *orthmanMan
over a year ago

Kendal

Sticking with trains...

'Avanti' means 'forward' in Italian. Avanti West Coast is thus not what it claims to be. It is going backwards, when it goes at all.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

The UK sea is typically sewage. Sewagegulls will nick your chips and ice cream

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kwik fit didn't sort out my dad bod.

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