FabSwingers.com forum: Best opening message

By *cnugatug OP Man
over a year ago

Chatham

What was your best worst or funniest opening message you received since you joined fab mine

Boy have I got a cock for you to suck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Having straight on my profile and getting messages from guys like "can I blow you" not even a hello lol

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By *undance_KidMan
over a year ago

London

You don’t look that good but I’m willing to give you a sympathy blow job

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Start spreading the news

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By *ab365XMan
over a year ago

Paisley

Can i use your underpants to make soup with?

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

I don't want to get in trouble for quoting PMs so I'll give you the gist. He referred to Hannah as a sexy hotwife and he wanted to bend her over and do certain things to her. When I told him we don't like being spoken to like that he blamed me for not taking it as a compliment. Luke

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By *nicorn4uWoman
over a year ago

telford

"Can i use your underpants to make soup with?"

WTF LOL

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By *undance_KidMan
over a year ago

London

"I don't want to get in trouble for quoting PMs so I'll give you the gist. He referred to Hannah as a sexy hotwife and he wanted to bend her over and do certain things to her. When I told him we don't like being spoken to like that he blamed me for not taking it as a compliment. Luke "

Yeah sorry about that Luke

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By *_Mr.K_xMan
over a year ago

Somewhere between Hades and Narnia

"Want to hear a joke about ropeplay or being tied up? I'm a freyed-knot"

"That is some nice underwear you're wearing, it'd look better on my bedroom floor"

"Hi, want to both laugh and be mildly disappointed at the same time?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best, worst and funniest all rolled onto one consisted of someone wanting to come back as toilet paper to have a chance of being between my cheeks

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

Want sex?

Litterally, that was it.

He was probably a 2-thrust wonder..

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman
over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales

“Awww I’m Daddy, are you my baby girl?”

“Can I tongue fuck your fart box?” (Although I thought that was quite original)

“Do you simulate breast feeding please?”

The list goes on and on and on…..

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By *ambi4uMan
over a year ago

Saint Helens

Guy messaged me once.

"Do you know my mum?"

Me,- "no"

Him, "do you want to?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just had

"Let meet pump that juicy pussy"

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By *nicorn4uWoman
over a year ago

telford

I have just had

Oh if only you were my step mother

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By *tarflyLouWoman
over a year ago

Preston

“I wish you were my cousin”

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

One that made me laugh was "are you Jackie from the arcades ?" I'm not btw .

I've also had will you role play being my sister & one asking me if I'd go on a stag do with a bloke and his mates to Newcastle.

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By *r SproutMan
over a year ago

the middle

"“I wish you were my cousin”

We’re they from Bedworth?

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By *tarflyLouWoman
over a year ago

Preston

"“I wish you were my cousin”

We’re they from Bedworth?

That would have explained it!

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By *arriedcoupleNECouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

The bloke who asked if we could give him a lift to work. As reward for this L could suck him off on the way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I received an incredible message from a beautiful lady a few weeks ago, when I was travelling in a different part of the country. Eloquent, considered and warm - mind blowing as I have rarely been contacted first by anyone here. So refreshing!

For anyone (mainly the guys I know) annoyed that they never receive messages, hang in there - and remember as with most things in life, you get what you give. Stay positive, stay human & don't take Fab too seriously

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
over a year ago

North West

I've been sent,

"I don't like your profile pic, can you send me a naked one?".

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By *inda May SimmonsTV/TS
over a year ago

hexham

I have had variations of

“I would love to meet you and fuck you, you remind me of my aunty.”

… “boss”

… “child’s teacher”

…”cousin”

Etc

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By *TK421-Man
over a year ago

Cheltenham

A friend of mine once received a CV from a guy. Thought it was really original. With references

Till she got 5 others like that quite soon.

I've not had a first message that wasn't off a forum topic (so just a chat). But I think the worst I've sent was as a noob... Hey, how you doing?

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

A guy quite far away from me wanted me to cum in condoms and post them to him, and he was happy to pay

It sounded like a fantasy but the guy was legit.

Stopped when a realised it might not be a kink, but a way of spreading my semen all over a crime scene

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One that made me laugh was "are you Jackie from the arcades ?" I'm not btw .

I've also had will you role play being my sister & one asking me if I'd go on a stag do with a bloke and his mates to Newcastle."

Hey I got the same stag invite. That makes me feel less special now

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By *ean counterMan
over a year ago

Kettering ish

I have no knickers on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A guy quite far away from me wanted me to cum in condoms and post them to him, and he was happy to pay

It sounded like a fantasy but the guy was legit.

Stopped when a realised it might not be a kink, but a way of spreading my semen all over a crime scene "

"Stopped"? So you actually did this?

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Meet now, from a guy yet I'm neither gay or bi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've never received an opening message that I haven't immediately deleted due to being from a bloke or TS/tv....before reading. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm torn between

'I've been fucking my ass with a banana and want you to watch me eat it.'

Wtf dude? No.

and in response to a forum post about two ladies playing for the benefit of their Doms..

'I once walked in on my sister and her best friend playing. Basically do what they did lol'

Hugely helpful.

I regularly get

'I want to serve you/be your cock caged boy/sissy please Goddess/Mistress etc.'

Just ew.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Had a message recently saying something like he wish he had a time machine to cock block all the men I've met and steal me away.

Had too many offering to pay for different services. One wanted me to shit on his face.

I had a very worrying one saying he wanted to give me all his passwords and login details and that I could anything I wanted with them for a period of time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just had another: I've just been let down, are you available to meet this afternoon?

Like I'm some sort of consolation prize. I've obviously never talked to him before.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Someone told me that the veins on my hand were hot

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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago

Not all that North of North London

I once got messaged by a man with a thing for old cock. Now I'm not the sort to be offended by men messaging me because truth be told I'm shallow enough to take the compliment even though I'm not interested. But fuckibg hell, how many times can one message contain the word "old"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm torn between

'I've been fucking my ass with a banana and want you to watch me eat it.'

Wtf dude? No.

and in response to a forum post about two ladies playing for the benefit of their Doms..

'I once walked in on my sister and her best friend playing. Basically do what they did lol'

Hugely helpful.

I regularly get

'I want to serve you/be your cock caged boy/sissy please Goddess/Mistress etc.'

Just ew."

In response to my above comment, I've just had

'So you don't like bananas then'

Really? (Insert face palm and eye roll here)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t tend to get rude messages get the odd abuse from lady’s which doesn’t really bother me just delete and block had more nice conversations with lady’s in non sexual way some message regularly think they just want to check I’m still alive

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

Funniest - Next time you're in Xtasia I'll bang you real good

Disturbing - I'll be your human toilet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Funniest - Next time you're in Xtasia I'll bang you real good

Disturbing - I'll be your human toilet

Whenever I hear or read "real good", I've got to start saying it like the salt n pepa song.

I got one just asking me if I wanted to fart tease him. I can imagine myself on his face pretending to fart. Not what I had in mind when I said I love teasing.

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

"A guy quite far away from me wanted me to cum in condoms and post them to him, and he was happy to pay

It sounded like a fantasy but the guy was legit.

Stopped when a realised it might not be a kink, but a way of spreading my semen all over a crime scene

"Stopped"? So you actually did this?"

Stopped chatting. Never went through with it, seemed to dodgey

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By *ociable-NottmCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

"Funniest - Next time you're in Xtasia I'll bang you real good

Disturbing - I'll be your human toilet

Whenever I hear or read "real good", I've got to start saying it like the salt n pepa song.

I got one just asking me if I wanted to fart tease him. I can imagine myself on his face pretending to fart. Not what I had in mind when I said I love teasing."

FFS fart tease, thinking we should unblock men for a few evenings, seems like we are missing out! hilarious thread op

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By *ady CurvaceousWoman
over a year ago

Kent

Take a look at the bottom of my profile. My best and worst opening messages are listed there and a bit of an eye opener.

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By *llaandGCouple
over a year ago

London

"Funniest - Next time you're in Xtasia I'll bang you real good

Disturbing - I'll be your human toilet

Whenever I hear or read "real good", I've got to start saying it like the salt n pepa song.

I got one just asking me if I wanted to fart tease him. I can imagine myself on his face pretending to fart. Not what I had in mind when I said I love teasing.

FFS fart tease, thinking we should unblock men for a few evenings, seems like we are missing out! hilarious thread op

Ella has a habit of turning off the filters, either "in the name of science" or when she's being more honest "for a laugh".... I suspect this thread may inspire her....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't suppose you're looking for a plumber?

Not the greatest as such, but it was perfectly timed to exactly a fantasy, role play scenario.

That led to a couple of fun meets.

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

"I have just had

Oh if only you were my step mother

I had that one the other day... Told me he'd sneak into my bed every morning

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Take a look at the bottom of my profile. My best and worst opening messages are listed there and a bit of an eye opener. "

Just read profile

WTF

Glad I’m bloke most are downright disrespectful and disgusting

Please don’t judge a book by its cover there are some decent nice guys on hear it’s just the few that are well weird

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/08/22 10:38:10]

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By *akingMemoriesMan
over a year ago

Toronto

'Were you the chap who delivered my pizza last night?'

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By *ociable-NottmCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

"Take a look at the bottom of my profile. My best and worst opening messages are listed there and a bit of an eye opener. "

Hahahaha so many funny one’s

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not an opener but a status i just read which reads..."singles and or part of a couple only"

Is there any other type of person?

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By *edplusoneCouple
over a year ago

West Midlands

“Can I tongue fuck your fart box?” (Although I thought that was quite original)"

Awful but funny

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By *flkfunseekerMan
over a year ago

Norwich

"I have just had

Oh if only you were my step mother

I had that one the other day... Told me he'd sneak into my bed every morning

Keep the doors locked !

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By *atisfiedSighWoman
over a year ago

NW Wiltshire

I've had lots from men trying to Dom or sub for me right off the bat. I know it's a popular dynamic but I'm not interested in it and don't appreciate being forced into it.

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By *ornyvirginphxWoman
over a year ago

phoenix

"You don’t look that good but I’m willing to give you a sympathy blow job

Wait, what?! Your pics are STUNNING

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

' U hard ' was one I got

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get quite a lot of femdom requests.

Which is a bit weird as my profile makes it clear I'm sub. Maybe I look bossy?

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

You're not for me if you don't like trains

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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

Had one who said I reminded him of his mum, and in a good way

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"Take a look at the bottom of my profile. My best and worst opening messages are listed there and a bit of an eye opener. "

Well at least my message wasn't one of them

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"Take a look at the bottom of my profile. My best and worst opening messages are listed there and a bit of an eye opener.

Well at least my message wasn't one of them

"
and I do like looking at your bottom

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By *nobyMan
over a year ago

Dorchester

"Want sex?

Litterally, that was it.

He was probably a 2-thrust wonder.."

Two??? Double my best!

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

"Had one who said I reminded him of his mum, and in a good way

I had similar not a first msg but had been chatting for awhile, we exchanged face pics and he said you look just like my mum when she was younger, she never had a body like yours though can't wait till we meet, didn't meet him blocked him, no way am I meeting Norman Bates!

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