FabSwingers.com forum: Validation

By *host63 OP Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham

In a conversation with a friend she confessed that she is on a dating site.

She also said that she is on it not to meet but to get validation that she is still desirable to men.

So it got me interested how many of you women on here have the same way of thinking and have no intention of ever meeting?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I validate myself.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Interesting.

I think men and women have at least a tiny part of them that needs and wants validation that they're attractive. Otherwise why would so many men immediately think their lack of success is because they're ugly rather than because there are way more men than women on here.

If I didn't enjoy being physically appreciated I would turn off the fab feature on our photos is all I'll say but we have met and will do again

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

The same has often been said about those who are always top of hotpics and how they have no intention of meeting but are only focused on getting as many fabs as possible.

My opinion on it is that we all need validation, some more than others and some at different stages.

Some find their level with fabs while some find it with how often they meet so there isn't always a direct link between validation and not meeting.

The need for validation isn't gender specific either.

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By *TK421-Man
over a year ago

Cheltenham

"The same has often been said about those who are always top of hotpics and how they have no intention of meeting but are only focused on getting as many fabs as possible.

My opinion on it is that we all need validation, some more than others and some at different stages.

Some find their level with fabs while some find it with how often they meet so there isn't always a direct link between validation and not meeting.

The need for validation isn't gender specific either. "

Yep... This.

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

I dont need validation

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By *alandNitaCouple
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

"In a conversation with a friend she confessed that she is on a dating site.

She also said that she is on it not to meet but to get validation that she is still desirable to men.

So it got me interested how many of you women on here have the same way of thinking and have no intention of ever meeting?"

Interesting thought.

I personally I've never considered myself to be physically attractive, but I know that I've got an awesome personality. I have never been fussed by other people's opinions of me though, I know how awesome I am... and other people are often wrong.

Cal

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I think most people enjoy being told someone else finds them attractive. In saying that on here any one who believes all the compliments they get are genuine are just heading for dissappointment as most are just blowing smoke up your ass in the hope of getting a meet.

But people can use fab however they want if they use it just go feel better about themselves and don't meet anyone then that's their choice and if it works for them and helps their confidence then I don't see the issue. No one has to actually meet anyone off here if they don't want to.

This bit is not directed at the OP in case they think it is this is just my general opinion but I find the whole well you aren't meeting you shouldn't be on here attitude to be entitled and presumptuous if I'm honest.No one is entitled to a meet or sex just because they join here. Do the site your way and concentrate on those who are on the same journey. Not on putting others down who do it differently.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think most people enjoy being told someone else finds them attractive. In saying that on here any one who believes all the compliments they get are genuine are just heading for dissappointment as most are just blowing smoke up your ass in the hope of getting a meet.

Totally agree

Validation starts from childhood and is definitely not gender specific , as a child you behave your told your great etc, g8ven treats, as we grow up the sane, we want to " fit in" we look for validation from our peers, when we work we excel with validation from our employers so on here some people do well with the validation, some are only here for that validation and may never meet but as JB says so what let people do fab the way they want to.

I was asked to meet recently told I wasn't meeting anyone to be asked what am I doing on a sex site. I have my reasons for not meeting and I don't have to explain it to anyone.

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By *agic.MMan
over a year ago

Orpington

I will own up to the fact that I am here mostly to express myself through my pics/videos, boost my confidence/self esteem a bit and get some form of validation from the opposite sex (good or bad...right or wrong). Meeting someone is not top of my priority list, and they would have to be pretty special for me to meet them (and/or have sex with them).

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"I dont need validation"

I don’t think I do really either.

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

"In a conversation with a friend she confessed that she is on a dating site.

She also said that she is on it not to meet but to get validation that she is still desirable to men.

So it got me interested how many of you women on here have the same way of thinking and have no intention of ever meeting?"

What do you think, OP?

Mrs TMN x

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

No I'm not, I love meeting people

I am disappointed at how many men actually just want the online instant gratification sex chat and then "poof" off they go

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By *iromancergirl1Woman
over a year ago

bolton

I do meet albeit not as often as I’d like and it is nice to be appreciated in whatever way that comes but I much prefer feeling appreciate in person as in that way I know there appreciation is directed at me as a whole and not just me as an image.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, I think it’s a bit strange to be on a dating site with no intention of meeting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I regularly scan myself at supermarket self-checkouts to see if they will validate me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also, I enjoy fabs, and I appreciate them on here, and it has boosted my confidence, but I don’t ‘need’ them, and I do meet (sometimes) on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dating sites are horrendous. Why would I put myself through that just for validation? Total waste of energy.

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

I (Luke) am entirely indifferent to being told I'm attractive (not that it's a common occurrence). If anything I'm a bit surprised because I don't think of myself that way.

What matters to me is what happens as a result of attraction. If I'm attracted to somebody and they are attracted to me and things happen because of that attraction, that's the bit that excites me. Equally if somebody is attracted to me and I'm not attracted to them, that can lead to awkward dealings with the person and I don't like that.

So really I'm not bothered about the words at all. In fact I can find it a bit embarrassing. My kicks come from the results of attraction.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We all are on here for that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Validation you are desirable to men?

As, a female you post a pic showing an inch of flesh and get told you're beautiful and sexy.

Does that mean you're beautiful and sexy? No. It means you're on a site full of men looking to get laid and you happen to have the right hole for that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Validation you are desirable to men?

As, a female you post a pic showing an inch of flesh and get told you're beautiful and sexy.

Does that mean you're beautiful and sexy? No. It means you're on a site full of men looking to get laid and you happen to have the right hole for that. "

Nailed it

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By *agic.MMan
over a year ago

Orpington

A wise person once said...

"Validation you are desirable to men?

As, a female you post a pic showing an inch of flesh and get told you're beautiful and sexy.

Does that mean you're beautiful and sexy? No. It means you're on a site full of men looking to get laid and you happen to have the right hole for that. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone seeks validation to feel good about themselves. How do they feel if they don’t receive the validation they require or even receive negative comments. I would say that person needs to work on themselves instead of being on dating sites.

I am who I am if people don’t like me that’s perfectly fine. Just do you and be happy.

And yes I’m here and on dating sites to meet people in real life not just boost my ego.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A wise person once said...

That coyoteugly and thantdancingguyonfab should just have sex already.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

There aren't many people in the world who are completely self sufficient. We *all* need validation of some kind.

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By *agic.MMan
over a year ago

Orpington

"A wise person once said...

That coyoteugly and thantdancingguyonfab should just have sex already.

That person is the wisest human to have ever walked on this earth!!! And their words should be put in practice immediately

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There aren't many people in the world who are completely self sufficient. We *all* need validation of some kind."

Exactly my thoughts. Especially on here as we take and post pictures of ourselves from a third person perspective.

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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago

Chinese Takeaway near you

In my honest opinion, I have no significant to add to this topic haha

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

"Validation you are desirable to men?

As, a female you post a pic showing an inch of flesh and get told you're beautiful and sexy.

Does that mean you're beautiful and sexy? No. It means you're on a site full of men looking to get laid and you happen to have the right hole for that. "

Exactly this, as much as I enjoy sharing our pics, the fabs don't give me any validation although it is nice as we enjoy the artistic element, it doesn't mean people like me or even how I look, they like a picture and a made up scenario of who they think I am based on that one photo.

Any validation I need comes from me and my man, that's all I care about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A wise person once said...

That coyoteugly and thantdancingguyonfab should just have sex already.

That person is the wisest human to have ever walked on this earth!!! And their words should be put in practice immediately

Omg get a room you two

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My history is the only validation i need

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think everyone would like to validated and all have different ways of going about it. As long as she's not stringing anyone along, I don't see a problem with it.

Personally, I think the reason I post loads of pictures on here was because I liked the compliments, especially as a time I didn't think I was all that attractive. We could all use the little bump in confidenc since in a while

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

If a little ego boost from a wink, a fab or a message is validation then yes a little but then i enjoy meeting too as for dating no not here to date

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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

"We all are on here for that "

I just wanna get laid.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

I certainly don't need the validation of any man. I know my worth x

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

I don't need validation! But yes I do meet when it suites me 2! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all are on here for that

I just wanna get laid. "

Ok and to get laid what do you need ? Another person? Who need to validate you to his/her liking.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dam this thread seems a bit to serous so am going to look at some boobs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think everyone would like to validated and all have different ways of going about it. As long as she's not stringing anyone along, I don't see a problem with it.

What he said... the fit little cunt

That's the type of compliments you meant, right?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think everyone would like to validated and all have different ways of going about it. As long as she's not stringing anyone along, I don't see a problem with it.

What he said... the fit little cunt

That's the type of compliments you meant, right?

I was about to agree with FH as that's the same reason I post photos. Taking them makes me feel more confident. Posting them even for a few hours also makes me feel more confident. Perhaps I am part-exhibitionist as well. Not sure.

You're both fit little c@nts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think everyone would like to validated and all have different ways of going about it. As long as she's not stringing anyone along, I don't see a problem with it.

What he said... the fit little cunt

That's the type of compliments you meant, right?

I got a tingle in my testicles just reading it

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

I’m a strong believer all women do that in one way or another

Very admit it

The rest lie and say they don’t

There’s nothing wrong with it either. Men do it too, just in different ways.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im simply here to spread joy to the people

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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

"We all are on here for that

I just wanna get laid.

Ok and to get laid what do you need ? Another person? Who need to validate you to his/her liking. "

I don't think I'd accord someone's decision of whether they'd fuck me with validation of me as a person. We'd all jump off a cliff if so.

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By *instonandLadyAstorCouple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

"Interesting.

If I didn't enjoy being physically appreciated I would turn off the fab feature on our photos is all I'll say but we have met and will do again "

Fabbed.

Winston

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

I also think biologically it’s more of a need for women to get validated then it is for men

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I also think biologically it’s more of a need for women to get validated then it is for men "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think everyone would like to validated and all have different ways of going about it. As long as she's not stringing anyone along, I don't see a problem with it.

What he said... the fit little cunt

That's the type of compliments you meant, right?

I got a tingle in my testicles just reading it

It makes me feel so special that I could evoke this tingle in you

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

I know a married woman who uses tineer this way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all are on here for that

I just wanna get laid.

Ok and to get laid what do you need ? Another person? Who need to validate you to his/her liking.

I don't think I'd accord someone's decision of whether they'd fuck me with validation of me as a person. We'd all jump off a cliff if so. "

Even if the validation isn’t verbally, it still does happen somehow. They mentally validate if they like enough you or not.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all are on here for that

I just wanna get laid.

Ok and to get laid what do you need ? Another person? Who need to validate you to his/her liking.

I don't think I'd accord someone's decision of whether they'd fuck me with validation of me as a person. We'd all jump off a cliff if so.

Even if the validation isn’t verbally, it still does happen somehow. They mentally validate if they like enough you or not. "

I miss the days of thinking somebody wanting to sex with you meant they like you.

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

I miss the days of thinking somebody wanting to sex with you meant they like you. "

I couldnt have sex with someone i didnt really like i have to be attracted to them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I miss the days of thinking somebody wanting to sex with you meant they like you.

I couldnt have sex with someone i didnt really like i have to be attracted to them

I definitely need to be attracted to someone to even kiss them , I've even attracted to quite a few I just never know if they attracted to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We all are on here for that

I just wanna get laid.

Ok and to get laid what do you need ? Another person? Who need to validate you to his/her liking.

I don't think I'd accord someone's decision of whether they'd fuck me with validation of me as a person. We'd all jump off a cliff if so.

Even if the validation isn’t verbally, it still does happen somehow. They mentally validate if they like enough you or not.

I miss the days of thinking somebody wanting to sex with you meant they like you. "

Validating you doesn’t mean they don’t like you. Quite the opposite, validation and liking is sort of interchangeable in that context in my opinion.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I also think biologically it’s more of a need for women to get validated then it is for men "

Biologically?

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple
over a year ago

Leeds

"I also think biologically it’s more of a need for women to get validated then it is for men

Biologically? "

Must be in the ovaries.....

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Fab validates that I have big tits. It's rare for me to be offered sex that appeals to me. The offers made never feel like validation of me, but a demand for validation of them.

I want to start dating, but haven't joined a site because I fear it wouldn't be much different to being here. The only difference is they'd have my face and name upfront.

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

"I also think biologically it’s more of a need for women to get validated then it is for men

Biologically? "

Yeah just like built in behaviours/instincts from millions of years living without civilisations

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I also think biologically it’s more of a need for women to get validated then it is for men

Biologically?

Yeah just like built in behaviours/instincts from millions of years living without civilisations"

Rather than the way we are socialised into gendered roles? Which I think just leads to seeking validation for different things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was looking for someone to validate my parking but stayed for the boobies.

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

"I also think biologically it’s more of a need for women to get validated then it is for men

Biologically?

Yeah just like built in behaviours/instincts from millions of years living without civilisations

Rather than the way we are socialised into gendered roles? Which I think just leads to seeking validation for different things.

Probably a bit of both

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

I must be a simple fellow. I was here to meet people and socialise. Being validated had never crossed, nor should it ever cross, anybody's mind.

Of course there will be people who just want to be admired to boost self confidence, or, ego. You can't stop that, which often leads yo the 'time waster' narrative.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I validate myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t need validation

I don’t need verification

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I wanted validation this really isn’t the place to find it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Validation not necessary...!

Is all about the nsa discreet real time fun in connecting with like minded peeps (at least it is for me, since have no desire of just being on site to form committee for idle chit chat, etc.)

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

If people are giving me huge compliments on here it makes me feel that the only validation it gives is that they would pretty much say whatever they think might get their dick wet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If people are giving me huge compliments on here it makes me feel that the only validation it gives is that they would pretty much say whatever they think might get their dick wet."

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By *host63 OP Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham

Not at all offended The question was simply because I am interested. A friend who went to a club fir the first time said she ame away with such a positive feeling be arsed she felt desirable and wanted by men and women and the other friend who was on a well known anvilla dating site just got me interested.

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By *host63 OP Man
over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham

"In a conversation with a friend she confessed that she is on a dating site.

She also said that she is on it not to meet but to get validation that she is still desirable to men.

So it got me interested how many of you women on here have the same way of thinking and have no intention of ever meeting?

What do you think, OP?

Mrs TMN x"

I think quite a few do, I don't think it's right or wrong it's just another dimension

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