FabSwingers.com forum: This guy gave me the creeps

By *ara J OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

Working from home today when the buzzer to the flat sounds at lunchtime.

"Sara, it's Nigel."

"Who?"

"Nigel. Can I come in?"

"Nigel? Who are you"

"I can't hear what you are saying."

I put down the handset and do not let him in.

I watch from window as a guy walks across to a car over the street, gets in and stays there, looking across.

I check my text messages. There is one from a guy called Nigel. "R u up 4drink & . . .. Bin let down and feeling horny. In Chippenham Cd CUM on down! nigel XXXX"

It was sent an hour earlier.

Thirty minutes later he is still there.

It feels very creepy.

I send him a text: "No thanks. And I do not like cold callers."

Who is this guy? Where did he get my number and address from?

I log onto this site. There is a similar message sent two hours earlier from a Nigel.

There is a pic. It is the guy sitting in the car.

After 40 minutes I decide to write down the car number. The vehicle has gone.

I cannot ever recall any previous contact with this person, yet he has my number, knows where I live and turns up unannounced.

I have reported him to the site admin. People on another site say I should go to the police.

It is seriously unnerving.

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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

The only thing I can think is that he might have contacted someone from your verifications and the fool gave him your address/phone number.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask him where he got your details from.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well I don't really see what you can go to the police over as you can't prove you haven't sent this guy details. You can complain but then its your word against his as he could say its a made up story and you are only doing it as you don't like him.

Report block and move on is the best option. Had similar with a woman myself outside and it stopped pretty quickly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Next time he shows up invite him in.

Where he is greeted by several men you know or have met.

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By *ara J OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

"Ask him where he got your details from."

Yes, i replied to his message asking just that. This was after the car left. He has not responded.

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By *am123Man
over a year ago

essex chelmsford

that is not cool this is why i dont accommadate and people wonder why??

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By *ara J OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

"that is not cool this is why i dont accommadate and people wonder why??

Yes. I understand that now. It is making very very wary now about giving my address to anyone here now. I think it will be the address of the pub from now on.

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By *innamon!Woman
over a year ago

no matter

Not cool at all ever to turn up without prearrangement does he not know how long it takes a girl to get ready !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Next time he shows up invite him in.

Where he is greeted by several men you know or have met.

Why on earth would a sane person do that?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ooh that was creepy, you handled it just right though, hope your nerves are about right again sweety

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By *ortheastcoupleukCouple
over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

one of our mates met a guy at theres ,5 month later he turns up on a sunday ,they had all the family in ,freaked them so bad they dropped out the scene, another freind had a ex meet knock at the door with a oh was just passing , bit different to the op but bang out of order ,wonder at times what goes thru ppls minds , we had that with cpl to so not just men.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"that is not cool this is why i dont accommadate and people wonder why??

Yes. I understand that now. It is making very very wary now about giving my address to anyone here now. I think it will be the address of the pub from now on."

Best tip all round is to:-

1/Meet in local place.

2/Walk to house leaving car where originally parked.

Then at least someone is lee likley to note your address down.

Most likley though you will have given details in the past maybe to previous profile for this guy which was deleted. It happens at times.

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By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

would be looking seriously through my verification list and friends list as im sure you wud remember if you have given your name mobile number and address to this guy .. very odd indeed !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At least you have his proper name to go on !

I mean if you were gonna pick a pseudonym or an alias, you wouldn't pick Nigel would ya ?

Sorry you have had a bad experience and glad to know that the creepy sod has now buggered off !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Doesn't take much these days on the internet to find out people's personal information.

192.com for eg

Sounds like you had a terrible experience, I'd be very concerned indeed and again one of the reasons why we don't accommodate.

Good job you have your security in place though where you live.

Hope nothing else comes of it for your sake.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How creepy!! I think you handled it in the best possible way. Hope you get to the bottom of the mystery, for your own peace of mind.

Red

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Doesn't take much these days on the internet to find out people's personal information.

We have just had this conversation in work today funnily enough.

I chat to a girl at another company and I was accused of flirting today.

My colleague said 'you'b better stop, she may sound nice, but is bound to be a munter' (my colleague is a girl btw)

So by typing her name in google, we were able to ascertain within 5 minutes :

- her professional profile (not locked)

- her facebook account (locked)

- her twitter account (not locked)

- what she looks like

- how old she is

- what films she likes

- where she lives

- the fact she is a single mum

- what her daughter looks like and how old she is

I would say that is pretty bloody scary stuff - and stuff that those that were so inclined could well use to her detriment !

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By *ornykev64Man
over a year ago

Suttton

Go to police huni we get a bad enough wrap because of our lifestyle doesn not mean we should have the creeps

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By *ilandlarryCouple
over a year ago

more north lincs than mids!

"Doesn't take much these days on the internet to find out people's personal information.

We have just had this conversation in work today funnily enough.

I chat to a girl at another company and I was accused of flirting today.

My colleague said 'you'b better stop, she may sound nice, but is bound to be a munter' (my colleague is a girl btw)

So by typing her name in google, we were able to ascertain within 5 minutes :

- her professional profile (not locked)

- her facebook account (locked)

- her twitter account (not locked)

- what she looks like

- how old she is

- what films she likes

- where she lives

- the fact she is a single mum

- what her daughter looks like and how old she is

I would say that is pretty bloody scary stuff - and stuff that those that were so inclined could well use to her detriment !

but was she a munter?

Sorry to hear you had a crappy experience Sara. Hope you can get to find out how he got your info x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Doesn't take much these days on the internet to find out people's personal information.

We have just had this conversation in work today funnily enough.

I chat to a girl at another company and I was accused of flirting today.

My colleague said 'you'b better stop, she may sound nice, but is bound to be a munter' (my colleague is a girl btw)

So by typing her name in google, we were able to ascertain within 5 minutes :

- her professional profile (not locked)

- her facebook account (locked)

- her twitter account (not locked)

- what she looks like

- how old she is

- what films she likes

- where she lives

- the fact she is a single mum

- what her daughter looks like and how old she is

I would say that is pretty bloody scary stuff - and stuff that those that were so inclined could well use to her detriment !

Yes exactly!

It amazes me how some leave themselves wide open as it were on the internet these days.

We are very careful not to give out our surname, as this could lead to being searched, but we are not searchable on Facebook etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

but was she a munter?

she was actually very nice looking, but far too young for me to consider guilt free flirting in future

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By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

wow had no idea you could find all that out so easy .. im so niave !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"wow had no idea you could find all that out so easy .. im so niave ! "

No offense to you, but yes you can pretty drill down on all sorts of information.

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By *ara J OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

"Go to police huni we get a bad enough wrap because of our lifestyle doesn not mean we should have the creeps "

I dont think he has committed a crime. Not one that I know of. Being an arsehole isn't against the law, I suppose.

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By *ovlad1986Man
over a year ago

Bedworth

"Go to police huni we get a bad enough wrap because of our lifestyle doesn not mean we should have the creeps

I dont think he has committed a crime. Not one that I know of. Being an arsehole isn't against the law, I suppose."

If you report it then if he comes back the police can act as they will try and get hold of the person by the number you have but if he comes back then it help as it loged on the PNC

And contact network to block number from texting ringing you

Why do creeps come on sites like this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a guy on another site stalking me, he threatened to stab me and abuse my daughter, I rang the police and told them I had screen prints of the threats, they said "leave the site" unless he knocked my door or sent me something in the post they wouldn't do anything, it didn't matter I had his name. This went on for a long time, he used to count down train stations to where I lived, told me he was stood outside the school he thought my daughter went to, in my local pub passing pic he'd got from my cam, someone told him my real name, I think it was someone I'd added to fb, thankfully mine is locked down. needless to say, I'm not on there now, so don't see it all and I've never seen him, so reckon he was just a sad old man, sat behind a pc.

Sorry you've had this happen to you, keep your chin up and if he continues report him x

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By *ig jugsWoman
over a year ago

somewhere

I met a guy off here once and went bck to mine.Next day his profile had been deleated with a pm saying "got back with girlfriend soz",

Though nothing of it till 4 months later the door goes and this stranger says to me "do u remember me" I reply "ermmmm nope"..He says he was passing and cud he come in for a bj...My jaw hit the floor.I said no chance I have family coming, and he begged me for a quickie,Needless to say I shut the door in his face.what an asshole and rude!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Working from home today when the buzzer to the flat sounds at lunchtime.

"Sara, it's Nigel."

"Who?"

"Nigel. Can I come in?"

"Nigel? Who are you"

"I can't hear what you are saying."

I put down the handset and do not let him in.

I watch from window as a guy walks across to a car over the street, gets in and stays there, looking across.

I check my text messages. There is one from a guy called Nigel. "R u up 4drink & . . .. Bin let down and feeling horny. In Chippenham Cd CUM on down! nigel XXXX"

It was sent an hour earlier.

Thirty minutes later he is still there.

It feels very creepy.

I send him a text: "No thanks. And I do not like cold callers."

Who is this guy? Where did he get my number and address from?

I log onto this site. There is a similar message sent two hours earlier from a Nigel.

There is a pic. It is the guy sitting in the car.

After 40 minutes I decide to write down the car number. The vehicle has gone.

I cannot ever recall any previous contact with this person, yet he has my number, knows where I live and turns up unannounced.

I have reported him to the site admin. People on another site say I should go to the police.

It is seriously unnerving."
No question report it to the police as if you have not given out your address (which seems so) he has obtained it from phone records..........report it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Go to police huni we get a bad enough wrap because of our lifestyle doesn not mean we should have the creeps

I dont think he has committed a crime. Not one that I know of. Being an arsehole isn't against the law, I suppose."
If he obtained your details from phone records he has committed an offence REPORT IT!!! Nutters like that have no place on a site like this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Interesting thread this Sara, makes us all realize how open we our, glad your ok ,if you see this guy again phone the police, he was stalking you !

It doesn't matter what we do as individuals no one has the right to just turn up uninvited , its scary !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Doesn't take much these days on the internet to find out people's personal information.

We have just had this conversation in work today funnily enough.

I chat to a girl at another company and I was accused of flirting today.

My colleague said 'you'b better stop, she may sound nice, but is bound to be a munter' (my colleague is a girl btw)

So by typing her name in google, we were able to ascertain within 5 minutes :

- her professional profile (not locked)

- her facebook account (locked)

- her twitter account (not locked)

- what she looks like

- how old she is

- what films she likes

- where she lives

- the fact she is a single mum

- what her daughter looks like and how old she is

I would say that is pretty bloody scary stuff - and stuff that those that were so inclined could well use to her detriment ! "

I am told (by a 'reliable' source.... okay, it's an ex-CID guy) that - if you know where to look, in 90 seconds, you can find out 90 pieces of information about ANYONE in this Country.... Sobering thought innit......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unfortunately I doubt the police would do anything!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

someone has passed your details to him.

see what time and day he turns up next and if its pattern forming have a friend waiting for him also.

but as he maybe a member here chances are he could have read this thread.

good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What was he thinking? He's quite obviously got no concept of what his actions have caused - the uneasiness and possible feeling of vulnerability he's given you. To go to a single woman's house, her personal space, uninvited and quite blatantly stalk her is bang out of order. Grrrrr, people like that really annoy me.

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By *ara J OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

Just back in.

He has sent me two messages now.

Neither of which makes any sense to me.

On on perspective i am content, that he replied.

On another, i do not wish to add anything at all to what i have said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sounds a bit 'special' to me

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By *nnyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

Whilst your evidence is limited, don't hesitate to call the cops.

Tell them what (little) you know, be as honest and truthful as possible - it may not benefit you right now but it may benefit others soon.

I hope it works out well for you.

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

The police won't get involved except to take a statement and issue a crime number. Even threats under the Misuse of Telecommunications Act will not be acted upon unless physical harm is involved.

Well done Sara for handling a scarey situation so well x

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By *nnyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

"The police won't get involved except to take a statement and issue a crime number. Even threats under the Misuse of Telecommunications Act will not be acted upon unless physical harm is involved.

.........."

That's a start. It isn't, or ought not to be, about ME and NOW, more about the ongoing risk to others and, whilst we can't usually rely on the polis to act timeously, the fact they know a victim is keeping tabs on their inactivity does tend to concentrate the mind.

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"The police won't get involved except to take a statement and issue a crime number. Even threats under the Misuse of Telecommunications Act will not be acted upon unless physical harm is involved.

..........

so a person receives over 300 messages threatening physical abuse to them/family/friends and report it to the police. Nothing happens except a report number... Does that person hope the police actually act upon the law or do they live in fear until the day they are attacked and possibly in no position to say... I told you the threats were real?

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By *nnyMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

"The police won't get involved except to take a statement and issue a crime number. Even threats under the Misuse of Telecommunications Act will not be acted upon unless physical harm is involved.

..........

If someone isnt getting support fromther local plod, there's an escalation proceedure available to them.

I appreciate it isn't always comfortable re how/ where/ why they met their stalker/ threat but how they react is entirely up to them

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

What if there is no reaction except to ignore but it still happens?

Have you ever actually been in this type of scenario?

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By *he tactile technicianMan
over a year ago

the good lands, the bad lands, the any where you may want me lands

"Working from home today when the buzzer to the flat sounds at lunchtime.

"Sara, it's Nigel."

"Who?"

"Nigel. Can I come in?"

"Nigel? Who are you"

"I can't hear what you are saying."

I put down the handset and do not let him in.

I watch from window as a guy walks across to a car over the street, gets in and stays there, looking across.

I check my text messages. There is one from a guy called Nigel. "R u up 4drink & . . .. Bin let down and feeling horny. In Chippenham Cd CUM on down! nigel XXXX"

It was sent an hour earlier.

Thirty minutes later he is still there.

It feels very creepy.

I send him a text: "No thanks. And I do not like cold callers."

Who is this guy? Where did he get my number and address from?

I log onto this site. There is a similar message sent two hours earlier from a Nigel.

There is a pic. It is the guy sitting in the car.

After 40 minutes I decide to write down the car number. The vehicle has gone.

I cannot ever recall any previous contact with this person, yet he has my number, knows where I live and turns up unannounced.

I have reported him to the site admin. People on another site say I should go to the police.

It is seriously unnerving.No question report it to the police as if you have not given out your address (which seems so) he has obtained it from phone records..........report it"
maybe you need to be making plans for nigel

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

"I had a guy on another site stalking me, he threatened to stab me and abuse my daughter, I rang the police and told them I had screen prints of the threats, they said "leave the site" unless he knocked my door or sent me something in the post they wouldn't do anything, it didn't matter I hard his name. This went on for a long time, he used to count down train stations to where I lived, told me he was stood outside the school he thought my daughter went to, in my local pub passing pic he'd got from my cam, someone told him my real name, I think it was someone I'd added to fb, thankfully mine is locked down. needless to say, I'm not on there now, so don't see it all and I've never seen him, so reckon he was just a sad old man, sat behind a pc.

Sorry you've had this happen to you, keep your chin up and if he continues report him x"

If you were threatened with violence then that is an offence and it was the duty of the police to investigate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry you've had this happen to you, keep your chin up and if he continues report him x

If you were threatened with violence then that is an offence and it was the duty of the police to investigate."

They weren't the least bit interested, regardless that I had been told his name and had screen prints of the threats, but like I said, I don't use that site now, but my friend does, he still talks about me, I forgot to say he set a website about me too lol....nutter springs to mind, my biggest dread is that he finds me on this site too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whilst not wishing to upset the o p i never give my address out until i have met somewhere local first there are sadly as the lady found out some wierdos around its not just males either.

I think the person who gave out the address is the one who needs outing as the chap who turned up may have genuinely thought it was ok based on what he was told. This in no way is condoning his stupidity.

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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

Sorry you've had this happen to you, keep your chin up and if he continues report him x

If you were threatened with violence then that is an offence and it was the duty of the police to investigate.

No the police were absolutely wrong. It is an offence. I would have been researching current law and turned up at my local station house armed with that and all evidence.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Take care pal, too many weirdos out there x

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By *ara J OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

"Take care pal, too many weirdos out there x"

Thank you.

You are my best pal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The police won't get involved except to take a statement and issue a crime number. Even threats under the Misuse of Telecommunications Act will not be acted upon unless physical harm is involved.

..........

the police dont really care about such things

My daughter split from her boyfriend at the beginning of the year and he didnt take the split will, texting her and following her, he'd sit outside the house all night, sit outside her place of work, whenever she went out he;d turn up, i called the police one night, its was about 3am, he had followed her home from a night out with her friend and he'd been there since about 11, the police came out, had a word with him, came to the house and told us he wasnt breaking any laws, so long as he dont come onto my garden he can sit on the street outside my house all night, and they left leaving him there

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

Exactly my point NN

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Exactly my point NN "

i know i was agreeing with you

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By *ara J OP TV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

"The police won't get involved except to take a statement and issue a crime number. Even threats under the Misuse of Telecommunications Act will not be acted upon unless physical harm is involved.

..........

the police dont really care about such things

Has he given up now?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Find him, have him knee-capped or 'scared off'

End of.

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By *edbagioMan
over a year ago

ripon

if you stir up shit;you can get anything

done;remmember that lady that killed herself and disabled child;

after that the police were made out to be inactive.

go too the police ;cab;get as much crap going for him turn the tables;

have you anyone who can follow him

but let him know it

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