FabSwingers.com forum: Couples A/c but write posts separately

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

To clarify=we do live together but mostly read/post comments on forums or send messages, individually. No particular reason, only cos one of us could be watching TV & the other quietly browsing on phone etc.

So the point being that it's great having a joint couples profile that we can both access (either at the same time or separately whenever one of us feels like it).

So we don't have to keep updating eachother what's going on

HOWEVER.. IF one of us should want to write something that they don't really want the other to read, then it can feel a little restricted.

NOT meaning dodgy things outside of our relationship boundaries like flirting or anything like that.

Meant things like sharing thoughts on insecurities or past experiences on forums for example.

Anyone else agree?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you not better sharing thoughts on insecurities or past experiences together... We do that's one of the best ways to strengthen your relationship

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

It seems a bit strange ( to me) that a couple would want to use fab that way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Are you not better sharing thoughts on insecurities or past experiences together... We do that's one of the best ways to strengthen your relationship "

I was thinking the same.

However, if by past experiences, you're talking about good sex with others, then maybe treat the forum and messages as you may your joint friends, with a little respect for one another.

If you know they may not hear you telling a mutual friend how great an ex was, don't tell that friend or mention it here.

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I'm confused as to what you're looking for agreement on, OP.

If you want to be having private conversations with people for any reason, one or both of you could have single profiles, surely.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

How very interesting both your replies are..

(Jane here btw)

Wasn't infact anticipating that it would seem odd.

Im intrigued now to see if there's any more responses so I can get a better idea of why?

(thanks for the honest feedback)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How very interesting both your replies are..

(Jane here btw)

Wasn't infact anticipating that it would seem odd.

Im intrigued now to see if there's any more responses so I can get a better idea of why?

(thanks for the honest feedback)

I'm a little confused at what you would like to discuss with strangers online, but not with your own partner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a couples profile. I on occasion had conversations about private things that I hadn't discussed with my boyfriend at the time. It wasn't keeping secrets from him. It was just early on in the relationship and things he didn't really need to know. I would delete the conversation and no harm done. I don't think it was wrong and don't feel bad

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Not think I've explained the situation in the right way.

It's not that there is anything particular in mind, when I say that some things I wouldn't feel comfortable posting because of my partner reading. It's more like IF either of us sees something that we'd like to respond to,from the view of fabbers wld be that it's from both of us.

Ie: as a woman I'm likely to be reading/replying to Topics relating to positivity & mutual support or light heartedness than Zac.

Therefore if I chose to share information that is Personal to me, I wouldn't want him to read it out of context potentially planting seeds in his head that I'm harbouring deep burning issues.

Is this a little clearer

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I had a couples profile. I on occasion had conversations about private things that I hadn't discussed with my boyfriend at the time. It wasn't keeping secrets from him. It was just early on in the relationship and things he didn't really need to know. I would delete the conversation and no harm done. I don't think it was wrong and don't feel bad

Exactly

Even though we're a close couple, we have lived our own lives and have different opinions but nothing that is a secret or an issue.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is where I struggle a bit. I - Viking post in the forum. I do so because I've always used forums as a medium of light entertainment - certainly more fun than EastEnders!

We are a swinging couple and do everything together. She doesn't like anything text based as she is dyslexic.

I do think at times I should have a forum only account for gassing as just myself to not give the wrong impression but that would feel like I would play alone - which I categorically won't do.

None of this is simple

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Exactly.

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By *he love catsCouple
over a year ago

South Wales

We both share an account so it's easier to keep updated. I post in the forum's and reply to most message's, he answers some message's, and arranges meets, he's not interested in the forum's as it's not his thing and I'm not interested in arranging hotel's, meets etc, so the one account is perfect for us. There's nothing we wouldn't share with each other in everyday life or on fab.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To clarify=we do live together but mostly read/post comments on forums or send messages, individually. No particular reason, only cos one of us could be watching TV & the other quietly browsing on phone etc.

So the point being that it's great having a joint couples profile that we can both access (either at the same time or separately whenever one of us feels like it).

So we don't have to keep updating eachother what's going on

HOWEVER.. IF one of us should want to write something that they don't really want the other to read, then it can feel a little restricted.

NOT meaning dodgy things outside of our relationship boundaries like flirting or anything like that.

Meant things like sharing thoughts on insecurities or past experiences on forums for example.

Anyone else agree? "

Make another account for forum use only.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

Can't say we have that problem to be honest OP. M knows how I think so is unlikely to misunderstand my posts, and even if he did he'd just ask.

If there's something you'd feel uncomfortable writing about on the forum in case there's a misunderstanding. It maybe be better not to post and have a chat with them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We both share an account so it's easier to keep updated. I post in the forum's and reply to most message's, he answers some message's, and arranges meets, he's not interested in the forum's as it's not his thing and I'm not interested in arranging hotel's, meets etc, so the one account is perfect for us. There's nothing we wouldn't share with each other in everyday life or on fab."

Yayy another viewpoint like ours

so relieved. Having read the first few who felt this was strange, we now feel reassured others are the same.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So the point being that it's great having a joint couples profile that we can both access (either at the same time or separately whenever one of us feels like it).

So we don't have to keep updating eachother what's going on

HOWEVER.. IF one of us should want to write something that they don't really want the other to read, then it can feel a little restricted.

NOT meaning dodgy things outside of our relationship boundaries like flirting or anything like that.

Meant things like sharing thoughts on insecurities or past experiences on forums for example.

Anyone else agree?

Make another account for forum use only.

Why?.. (not intending that to sound stroppy, but not sure understand why this would be an option?)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Can't say we have that problem to be honest OP. M knows how I think so is unlikely to misunderstand my posts, and even if he did he'd just ask.

If there's something you'd feel uncomfortable writing about on the forum in case there's a misunderstanding. It maybe be better not to post and have a chat with them. "

Yep, that's the jist of it.. I end up not posting.

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