FabSwingers.com forum: I saw you in Asda

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

One of the perils of having a face pic I suppose, is that people may recognise you. That’s not the purpose of this post though.

How do you feel about those who then message you and tell you “I’ve just seen you in Asda with your mate, you were wearing a pink dress…..”?

I’m personally always creeped out and thinking I need to take off my face pics but how do you feel if it’s ever happened to you?

I get it more often than I’d like.

A guy was even watching my friend and I eat lunch!! He sat staring the whole time, then messaged later!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Omg that is totally scary. There are going to be occasions where your recognised and where appropriate a smile but that's all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Urgh that's so creepy!

I don't have a face pic, but a guy approached me in the street the other week and asked if I was (previous username). Freaked me a bit. I just said no, what're you talking about and left. Sharpish.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Omg that is totally scary. There are going to be occasions where your recognised and where appropriate a smile but that's all.

It’s the fact that they message me later to tell me where and when they saw me that creeps me out.

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

It seems very creepy and almost stalkerish. There are no words to describe how much I hate it when men do this, do they honestly think it's a good idea and women will like it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would say "What do you mean? I wasn't in Asda today"

But that's why I don't have face pics either. I have family local as well so wouldn't want someone being a dick and showing them. It would creep me out but scare me at the same time. I hope it doesn't shake you too much

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

This particular guy said “I’ve just seen you in blah blah with your mate”, I denied it, he then went on to argue that he knew it was me and was going to come over but didn’t (thank god!!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At least he didn’t approach you in Asda. He chose the better of the two options.

The staring is a bit creepy, but I guess that’s part of the territory that goes with having face pics here.

As for being recognised myself, I’ve never had it, and imagine that I could fly completely under the radar. I don’t have enough Boobage, or vag’ to warrant being stared at while I walk the middle aisle of Lidl.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had it once after having a face pic public for a mere hour! It was sainsbury's, he'd spotted me from the other side of the self-checkout and messaged by the time I'd got home.

I get it, people will spot you, but I had my son with me at the time, who was only 5, and it hit me that not everyone might be respectful enough to send just a message. Someone could easily have said something in person in front of my child, or friend, or whoever I'm with at the time. That definitely freaked me out.

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

We’ve had a few people do it and I guess it’s the way it’s mentioned as to the creepiness of it.

If they ask ‘we’re you *insert hotel earlier?’ then that’s fine however if it’s ‘I’ve just seen you, you looked hot in your dress, it got me excited’ and it’s from a guy with no pics, blank profile then it’s creepy AF!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it makes you feel bad then that’s not cool. Nobody should be creeped out.

A guy can’t help but notice a cute girl, and I’ll glance all the time. Stupidly I take a second look of they are stunning, but to stare at a stranger is a bit wrong. Teachers tell you that as a child.

I might stick my face in here one day, I wouldn’t mind so much if someone recognised me and dropped a line to say that. But it definitely needs to have a ‘just wanted to say hello’ babe about it. And not a ‘I know where you hang out!’

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You mean this doesn't work?

Fuck sake, another prime tactic ruined.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Omg that is totally scary. There are going to be occasions where your recognised and where appropriate a smile but that's all.

It’s the fact that they message me later to tell me where and when they saw me that creeps me out."

Jesus Chirst! That's definitely breaching personal boundaries and potential stalker.

Any chance you wanna share the profile name so to pre warn ladies on here

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By *eyeYCouple
over a year ago

Nr Leicester

Honestly we're sure that feels creepy as fuck!!

Putting the shoe on the other foot though if we recognized someone from Fab and thought they looked well, Fab! What to do?

We'd like to say so, but would never approach in a public place or indiscreet way!!

We'd possibly send something like "Hi, sorry but we recognized you today and just wanted to say hi and that you looked hot!"

Even as we type it feels stalkerish though..

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why do they need to message though, to say they’ve seen you?

The worst I’ve ever experienced was when a guy with a silhouette head messaged me while I was in McDonald’s and was like “I knew that was you, I’m in here too” it’s was creepy as fuck as it was busy and I didn’t know who it was. I left sharpish!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few years ago I used to go on cam often and I would show my face as well. Talked to a guy regularly who turned out to be a complete nutter who was collecting screenshots of me and then tried to scare me saying how he would destroy my life etc.

Unfortunately some men won't understand how creepy their behaviour is. I know I could advise you to take your face pics down but I don't think that's right to let the nutters win.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wouldn’t like it at all

People need to understand worlds are different and don’t cross

It’s the people that don’t understand that. That make people causes in who they meet and what they do and stuff

The unwritten rules off fab

If you see someone in the real world don’t stare or message after words that’s creepy keep it to them selfs

If we meet no blabbing to friends or anything about what we did exserta I don’t need to be the talk off the place and well done they never get another meet

Couldn’t Thay have just keep they mouth shut and injoy the weekly / daly or however long bween times sex

If we have meet before and we pass in the street a nod or a wink on the way past is all that’s need please don’t stop and try and conversation with me

I don’t need to be make up bs to family or friends I am with about how I know some random on the spot

Don’t think ooo well you know I shaging him every week going to go down well

Hugs you have done nothing wrong it’s him in the wrong

Do what I do just edit the pic and dot out face that way there isn’t a way to tell and you can still have full pics

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Which Asda was it?….

*it’s a joke!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Even worse than this, last week I had a faceless message from someone who said they knew me, had always fancied me and was shocked I was on here. They wouldn’t reveal them selves (as they wanted to stay incognito!!!) but they did know where I worked etc so it was legit.

I was so creeped out!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Even worse than this, last week I had a faceless message from someone who said they knew me, had always fancied me and was shocked I was on here. They wouldn’t reveal them selves (as they wanted to stay incognito!!!) but they did know where I worked etc so it was legit.

I was so creeped out! "

Worrying x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?"

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

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By *innocentMan
over a year ago

Littlehampton

If you were an Instagram model ,and this same thing happened ,would it be cause for any form of concern,or would it be a compliment that your modeling work is being recognised by more people other than Barry in the local paper shop?

Or is it a concern because you were recognised off here ?

I don't get why people are so caught up bout face photos...this isn't a public website ,unlike Instagram. You literally can not see anything unless you are a member yourself ,in which case ,no one can be shocked ,because they are a fellow member

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We’ve had it at clubs but that’s different I suppose. I would find it creepy if we were just going about our everyday life and we were getting those types of messages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If you were an Instagram model ,and this same thing happened ,would it be cause for any form of concern,or would it be a compliment that your modeling work is being recognised by more people other than Barry in the local paper shop?

Or is it a concern because you were recognised off here ?

That is not true. Unless you’ve tweaked your privacy settings your profile and images can be found on Google.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Or is it a concern because you were recognised off here ?

I wouldn’t be bothered if someone recognised me from instagram.

I don’t want this world and my real life mingling (that’s why thousands don’t have face pics on here but do on social media).

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By *aximus74Woman
over a year ago

Manchester

Staring the whole rime is very creepy..

I had a guy message me and tell me he had seen/recognised me at my local shopping centre..

I have no face pics here so I wondered how and asked "if you thought it was me why didn't you say hello"

He said he would thought it rude and didn't want to say where he thought he knew me from as obviously he didn't know if was with anyone or they knew if I was on here..(I was with a friend and no they don't know I'm on here)

So in some cases I think it's ok not to say anything and then leave a message,I think I would do the same.

I wouldn't approach in the street/area ect x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was in work and helping a customer. I saw a women trying to catch my eye and it was pretty obvious what she was doing.

After I'd finished helping the customer, I went over to her to see if she needed any assistance.

She asked if we could chat privately. I agreed as a common request in my job and all rooms have CCTV.

We sat opposite to each other and she mentioned that she had been visiting the office over the last few weeks and liked me.

She produced a carrier bag with some " professional photos " in and asked my opinion on them.

I could feel myself begin to sweat and feeling really uncomfortable. I didn't comment on them and quickly made an exit saying I had a meeting.

She never returned but made sure HR were aware.

True Story.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got recognised at the local farm shop by an older fairly rotund gentleman. As I was getting back into my car he approached me and said ‘yes I have seen you on fab’.

I didn’t say a word and drove off pretty cross as it’s just not right is it .

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By *undance_KidMan
over a year ago

London

"One of the perils of having a face pic I suppose, is that people may recognise you. That’s not the purpose of this post though.

How do you feel about those who then message you and tell you “I’ve just seen you in Asda with your mate, you were wearing a pink dress…..”?

I’m personally always creeped out and thinking I need to take off my face pics but how do you feel if it’s ever happened to you?

I get it more often than I’d like.

A guy was even watching my friend and I eat lunch!! He sat staring the whole time, then messaged later! "

Just do a Lance Armstrong and deny everything!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I got recognised at the local farm shop by an older fairly rotund gentleman. As I was getting back into my car he approached me and said ‘yes I have seen you on fab’.

I didn’t say a word and drove off pretty cross as it’s just not right is it . "

It’s not right!

Why do these people feel that they have to inform you? They can’t help themselves!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"One of the perils of having a face pic I suppose, is that people may recognise you. That’s not the purpose of this post though.

How do you feel about those who then message you and tell you “I’ve just seen you in Asda with your mate, you were wearing a pink dress…..”?

I’m personally always creeped out and thinking I need to take off my face pics but how do you feel if it’s ever happened to you?

I get it more often than I’d like.

A guy was even watching my friend and I eat lunch!! He sat staring the whole time, then messaged later!

Just do a Lance Armstrong and deny everything!!! "

I did! He argued and argued that he knew it was me and went on to describe what I was wearing!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was in work and helping a customer. I saw a women trying to catch my eye and it was pretty obvious what she was doing.

After I'd finished helping the customer, I went over to her to see if she needed any assistance.

She asked if we could chat privately. I agreed as a common request in my job and all rooms have CCTV.

We sat opposite to each other and she mentioned that she had been visiting the office over the last few weeks and liked me.

She produced a carrier bag with some " professional photos " in and asked my opinion on them.

I could feel myself begin to sweat and feeling really uncomfortable. I didn't comment on them and quickly made an exit saying I had a meeting.

She never returned but made sure HR were aware.

True Story. "

Be wary, very wary my friend- you’ve done the right thing but definitely keep an eye out for her.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down."

Let's not forget the site we're on. It's full of horny guys. If you're going to post pics that make you recognisable then realise you're gonna get recognised. And no, not everyone is going to do it in an appropriate way. Because shockingly enough not everyone knows how to behave.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

Gutting! You need a face like mine, one that just blends into the crowd.

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

I think it’s creepy, weird and unnecessary.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Yes. It has happened to me a couple of times over the years.

The problem is mine. Not theirs. And to all those that have said OMG ..... the problem is yours not theirs.

It's creepier the other way around. I've been the person who saw someone in their place of work , KNEW who they were and didn't say a word all the time a meeting was in session... or later. I felt it would have been more honest and less weird to tell him who I was but I didn't as he was in his place of work ( aren't I a saint ) a HUGE factor in me not telling him was that I had no make up on and was dressed down, very down......

I get that everyone can be shocked when they realise people can actually SEE them and RECOGNISE them ..... but blaming the other person is a whole lot of transferal going on ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

Serious “she was wearing a short skirt so she was asking for it” vibes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's why I don't post any pubically. Not everyone knows how to behave accordingly.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

Rose...... that would be too sensible for those who think their own behaviour doesn't carry consequences.

I don't agree that those who say'hi i've seen you' don't know how to behave..... there's no written rules...

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By *undayTarkaMan
over a year ago

North Devon, Manchester Middleton

"Why do they need to message though, to say they’ve seen you?

What's just as creepy is that you were in fab in McDonald's hahaha. Weird

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

Serious “she was wearing a short skirt so she was asking for it” vibes

No it isn't.

Women on here want messages.

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Happens often at least once a week! I find it amusing in all honesty! Some approach me at the time more often though I get that message later I saw u at such and such or riding your bike! I work in a supermarket so happens alot there! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/08/22 08:06:25]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes. It has happened to me a couple of times over the years.

The problem is mine. Not theirs. And to all those that have said OMG ..... the problem is yours not theirs.

I get that everyone can be shocked when they realise people can actually SEE them and RECOGNISE them ..... but blaming the other person is a whole lot of transferal going on ...

I’m not bothered that they recognise me, it’s the creepy “I saw you, you were wearing etc etc “ messaged that creep me out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes it’s very creepy! I’ve had a few similar sent, just seen you walking along x road (which I was). I don’t get why you’d message that

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why do they need to message though, to say they’ve seen you?

What's just as creepy is that you were in fab in McDonald's hahaha. Weird"

I was just replying to a friend about a club night we were going to that night whilst I was waiting (20 bloody mins) for my number to be called.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sometimes the behaviour can be unpleasant and even illegal (the woman above who had screenshot taken) but simply telling someone you recognised them out and about isn't stalking.

Stalking is a deliberate act, seeing a random person in the shop and recognising them from their photos isn't.

I think a lot of the uneasiness comes from loss of control. When a faceless profile tells us they've recognised a pic it feels as though we have ceded control to them - and no doubt a certain type of person will enjoy the feeling of power this gives them. In reality, unless the behaviour becomes actual stalking these feelings are illogical.

I saw person A on Fab. I recognised person A in Asda ...... and then? What exactly has seeing you irl actually changed? What would be different if they didn't tell you? Are you creeped out by the idea unknown numbers of people have recognised you but not said anything? If not, why is it more creepy when someone does say? Which would you prefer, a nice friendly person dropping a message to say I recognised you today, made me smile or some smelly dirty man recognising you, saying nothing but going home and having a wank thinking of how your arse looked waking around Asda? The reality is you have no idea how often scenario 2 happens and it doesn't affect you in the slightest so why is scenario 1 an issue? - these aren't rhetorical questions, I am curious. Pretty sure I'm not wired normally so I have to ask normal people to understand how they think

We cannot stop other people from being able to match a photo with a face, outside of our Fab filters we can't stop them telling us they've done so. All we can do is choose what we post in a public place, we have control over that. We can also legitimately complain about illegal behaviour.

I just think it is weird to have a profile full of face pics then start a thread complaining that people recognise you

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

There are at least TWO occassions when I was glad of the ' I saw you' messages.

One I was with my daughter in a cafe in Manchester.

Two I was at the entrance to the Mersey Tunnel with my son in law and grandchildren.

I got a message both times. Different blokes. The only thing that worried me was that they saw me but I didn't see them and I just thanked God they didnt' approach me while I was with family .... PLUS the biggest 'oh no' for me was that I wasn't dressed up!

Their messages weren't creepy or threatening .... just 'I saw you'

Sometimes when you get a shock you THINK bad things about the other person.

It's hardly fucking stalking.

Unnerving yes. Doesn't make them dangerous perves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

Serious “she was wearing a short skirt so she was asking for it” vibes

No it isn't.

Women on here want messages. "

But she is blaming a woman for the shitty behaviour of men. I struggle to see the difference.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

Serious “she was wearing a short skirt so she was asking for it” vibes

No it isn't.

Women on here want messages.

It’s still blaming shitty behaviour of men on a woman. Just because you post a face pic doesn’t give people the right to approach you in public."

Wait just one minute.

If the op (or anyone , sorry for talking about the op in third person) wasn’t on here, can I approach an attractive woman in public?

Does it matter if anyone is on a social media site? It’s all about respect.

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By *agic.MMan
over a year ago

Orpington

Face pics on fab are a bad idea (from my pov) for so many reasons...

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

Being completely honest, it depends who the message is from and how it comes across.

When I first put a public face pic up (was face and naked boobs actually), within about half an hour I had a lot of messages from local guys (this is a small town and I'm quite well known) using my real name and saying various things, some polite and some downright graphic, but all indicating they knew me to varying degrees from seen me round town to actually knowing me. I was creeped out by the profiles that had no pictures at all. Because that, to me, is creepy.

There were a couple of torsos in there, and one of them was an attractive one. That message made me smile.

And I used to get messages a lot from random silhouettes and body parts telling me they'd seen me out and about, particularly weird is when it's someone who lives 300 miles away (we get a lot of tourists). I have solved that by hardly leaving the house, but I still get them on occasion... some hedging their bets and totally wrong, some absolutely did see me when I popped to Tesco or the post office.

I think it is like any kind of interaction, whereby if it is from someone we like on any level (superficial all the way through to an actual friend), we enjoy it more than we do if we don't like the person. And if we have no idea who the person is, we can only judge whether we like them on what they say... horror films have shown us over the years that "I'm watching you" from a faceless, nameless person is creepy as fuck.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sometimes the behaviour can be unpleasant and even illegal (the woman above who had screenshot taken) but simply telling someone you recognised them out and about isn't stalking.

Stalking is a deliberate act, seeing a random person in the shop and recognising them from their photos isn't.

I just think it is weird to have a profile full of face pics then start a thread complaining that people recognise you

Mr"

I’m not bothered that they’ve recognised me, that’s fine.

It’s that they feel the need to message me “I saw you at 8.07 in the veg aisle, you were wearing a pink dress and white trainers, you picked up a carrot” message that goes with it that I don’t like.

What’s the purpose of that message?

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Why do they need to message though, to say they’ve seen you?

What's just as creepy is that you were in fab in McDonald's hahaha. Weird"

I'm always on fab in random places lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

Serious “she was wearing a short skirt so she was asking for it” vibes

No it isn't.

Women on here want messages.

It’s still blaming shitty behaviour of men on a woman. Just because you post a face pic doesn’t give people the right to approach you in public.

Wait just one minute.

If the op (or anyone , sorry for talking about the op in third person) wasn’t on here, can I approach an attractive woman in public?

Does it matter if anyone is on a social media site? It’s all about respect.

You can but I wouldn’t recommend telling her what she was wearing at a specific place and time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

Serious “she was wearing a short skirt so she was asking for it” vibes

No it isn't.

Women on here want messages.

But she is blaming a woman for the shitty behaviour of men. I struggle to see the difference."

Why don't you have face pictures on here? Because you know how many weird people are on here and you don't want to be recognised I'm guessing. It's not hard is it?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Yes. It has happened to me a couple of times over the years.

The problem is mine. Not theirs. And to all those that have said OMG ..... the problem is yours not theirs.

I get that everyone can be shocked when they realise people can actually SEE them and RECOGNISE them ..... but blaming the other person is a whole lot of transferal going on ...

I’m not bothered that they recognise me, it’s the creepy “I saw you, you were wearing etc etc “ messaged that creep me out. "

Why is it creepy ? Serious Q .... why is it creepy ?

Saying what you were wearing is just for i.d./ proof.

They are not asking you what you are wearing in order to be freaky. They are just confirming it was you.

I get it has unnerved you. It did me the first time. Just a learning curve.

A bit of logic n reason n presto .... safeguard yourself if worried.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

I kind of get it and I kind of don't.

I get it's a bit creepy in a 'im watching you' kind of way but they did see you and you make it easy for them to link it to your fab account.

They haven't forced themselves upon you. They've just stated a fact. They saw you 'in the wild' as it were. They haven't demanded a meet because they saw you in McDonald's. They've simply tried to use a better line than 'hey, wuu2'.... something numerous men are told to do each and every day!

As granny has said, at least they had the restraint not to physically approach you in public.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

Serious “she was wearing a short skirt so she was asking for it” vibes

No it isn't.

Women on here want messages.

But she is blaming a woman for the shitty behaviour of men. I struggle to see the difference.

Why don't you have face pictures on here? Because you know how many weird people are on here and you don't want to be recognised I'm guessing. It's not hard is it? "

That’s irrelevant though. You’re basically saying if you post your face deal with the consequences. We choose not to because our family wouldn’t approve not because of complete strangers approaching us.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes. It has happened to me a couple of times over the years.

The problem is mine. Not theirs. And to all those that have said OMG ..... the problem is yours not theirs.

I get that everyone can be shocked when they realise people can actually SEE them and RECOGNISE them ..... but blaming the other person is a whole lot of transferal going on ...

I’m not bothered that they recognise me, it’s the creepy “I saw you, you were wearing etc etc “ messaged that creep me out.

Why is it creepy ? Serious Q .... why is it creepy ?

Saying what you were wearing is just for i.d./ proof.

They are not asking you what you are wearing in order to be freaky. They are just confirming it was you.

I get it has unnerved you. It did me the first time. Just a learning curve.

A bit of logic n reason n presto .... safeguard yourself if worried. "

I don’t know what it achieves. Ok, you saw me, you know what I was wearing, you’ve told me. Ok, and what?

So now I know that you’ve seen me and recognised me, I feel creeped out and you’ve achieved what? A badge for frequenting the same Asda? A memory reward for memorising every detail of my outfit that day? What’s the purpose? It’s weird!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

Serious “she was wearing a short skirt so she was asking for it” vibes

No it isn't.

Women on here want messages.

But she is blaming a woman for the shitty behaviour of men. I struggle to see the difference."

Nope. I've read it three times and she doesn't blame women for the behaviour of men at all.

I don't want to change the direction of the thread but she really does not blame women for what men do.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

Weirdly I have been approached on here too and I don’t have face pics published - it was because of my height that they “recognised” me. I solved the problem with a block.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"Yes. It has happened to me a couple of times over the years.

The problem is mine. Not theirs. And to all those that have said OMG ..... the problem is yours not theirs.

I get that everyone can be shocked when they realise people can actually SEE them and RECOGNISE them ..... but blaming the other person is a whole lot of transferal going on ...

I’m not bothered that they recognise me, it’s the creepy “I saw you, you were wearing etc etc “ messaged that creep me out.

Why is it creepy ? Serious Q .... why is it creepy ?

Saying what you were wearing is just for i.d./ proof.

They are not asking you what you are wearing in order to be freaky. They are just confirming it was you.

I get it has unnerved you. It did me the first time. Just a learning curve.

A bit of logic n reason n presto .... safeguard yourself if worried.

I don’t know what it achieves. Ok, you saw me, you know what I was wearing, you’ve told me. Ok, and what?

Surely the purpose is they hope to start a conversation? Might not always work but they don't know unless they try, right?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

Serious “she was wearing a short skirt so she was asking for it” vibes

No it isn't.

Women on here want messages.

But she is blaming a woman for the shitty behaviour of men. I struggle to see the difference.

Nope. I've read it three times and she doesn't blame women for the behaviour of men at all.

I don't want to change the direction of the thread but she really does not blame women for what men do. "

It basically says don’t do that if you don’t want men to respond. That’s how I read it and I disagree.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sometimes the behaviour can be unpleasant and even illegal (the woman above who had screenshot taken) but simply telling someone you recognised them out and about isn't stalking.

Stalking is a deliberate act, seeing a random person in the shop and recognising them from their photos isn't.

I just think it is weird to have a profile full of face pics then start a thread complaining that people recognise you

I’m not bothered that they’ve recognised me, that’s fine.

What’s the purpose of that message? "

Im guessing it is to establish a connection - we all seek common ground with someone we would like to strike up a conversation with. It's a bit tenuous admittedly but I'm guessing for many it feels a bit more real than "I like your profile"

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By *aGaGagging for itCouple
over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne

There's an unwritten code in swinging, which shouldn't need explaining. If you don't get it you shouldn't be doing it.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Then don't have face pics.

I get it is creepy, but if you're going to be on a swingers site with full face pics then what do you expect?

You’re right. We can’t expect people to act like normal human beings with thought and respect.

I am going to take them down.

It's like the women that complain about all the messages they get while also posting pics of their legs spread

Serious “she was wearing a short skirt so she was asking for it” vibes

No it isn't.

Women on here want messages.

But she is blaming a woman for the shitty behaviour of men. I struggle to see the difference.

Why don't you have face pictures on here? Because you know how many weird people are on here and you don't want to be recognised I'm guessing. It's not hard is it?

Wait, an adult dealing with the consequences of a choice they made?

I'm not even talking about the whole she was asking for it debate either, I'm talking about the op.

You're on a swinging site. Women complain all the time about the crude messages they get so you know the types of guys on here. You post a face pic, you're gonna get those types of messages the op stated. It's not a hard concept to grasp.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt. "

It’s never your fault hugs

People need to learn different worlds mean different things and they don’t cross

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Yes. It has happened to me a couple of times over the years.

The problem is mine. Not theirs. And to all those that have said OMG ..... the problem is yours not theirs.

I get that everyone can be shocked when they realise people can actually SEE them and RECOGNISE them ..... but blaming the other person is a whole lot of transferal going on ...

I’m not bothered that they recognise me, it’s the creepy “I saw you, you were wearing etc etc “ messaged that creep me out.

Why is it creepy ? Serious Q .... why is it creepy ?

Saying what you were wearing is just for i.d./ proof.

They are not asking you what you are wearing in order to be freaky. They are just confirming it was you.

I get it has unnerved you. It did me the first time. Just a learning curve.

A bit of logic n reason n presto .... safeguard yourself if worried.

I don’t know what it achieves. Ok, you saw me, you know what I was wearing, you’ve told me. Ok, and what?

I'd go for ' messaging without thinking' ....

Or 'messaging with a hope of .... '

Or ' just lonely'

Yada Yada....

The creepy idea comes from within....

As the old sayin' goes..... block n move on.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *oney orchidWoman
over a year ago

Birmingham

Just a thought, perhaps make sure you switch your location off in your settings. People might not recognise you as in they are remembering your face from previously looking at Fab. They might just be looking at "see who's near" function and are trying to work out if they can spot individuals? Well - in some instances anyway. I must admit I've done it - but would never then message someone to say I'd spotted them. LoL

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There's an unwritten code in swinging, which shouldn't need explaining. If you don't get it you shouldn't be doing it. "

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

I don’t understand why people feel a need to tell you they have seen you. You never know how a person will respond to that sort of message. People are on fab for a reason but when they are about their daily business that is not fab related, just leave them be.

I don’t want anyone to tell me they have seen me or know me. Just putting that out there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt. "

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just a thought, perhaps make sure you switch your location off in your settings. People might not recognise you as in they are remembering your face from previously looking at Fab. They might just be looking at "see who's near" function and are trying to work out if they can spot individuals? Well - in some instances anyway. I must admit I've done it - but would never then message someone to say I'd spotted them. LoL "

That’s the thing, I had that turned off!!!

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

I'm not sure how they do it. They must study a face in inordinate detail. I wouldn't be able to pick people out like that from glancing at a photo on here.

There's always going to be the strange kind of guy on here. Only swap faces once you've been chatting

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By *empmanMan
over a year ago

Newton aycliffe

I messaged someone the other day asking if I'd seen them at the dentists. got nice reply saying no but it's started a 2 way conversation about a meet. Am I a creep?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"There's an unwritten code in swinging, which shouldn't need explaining. If you don't get it you shouldn't be doing it. "

I sort of giggled at that. Is that wrong of me?

What is the 'unwritten code' and how do we get to know it ?

How do you know it ?

What is it we shouldn't be doing if we don't get it ?

Are you a Mason ?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I messaged someone the other day asking if I'd seen them at the dentists. got nice reply saying no but it's started a 2 way conversation about a meet. Am I a creep?"

I don't know. Did you ask her how many fillings she had ? That'd be creepy

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!"

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This happens to me quite often. Donny isn’t that big and there are even less very tall, mixed race women with bright hair!

I tend to stand out! I often get told they’ve seen me!

I’m not creeped out unless they stare but most of the time I’ve not even noticed them.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

If it makes you feel creeped out then those are your feelings and we shouldn't seek to dismiss them but I do think it needs exploring as to why it makes you feel that way.

If they repeatedly said they'd seen you somewhere. A pattern of behaviour as such then yes, creepy!

If they said they followed you about a bit, then you. Creepy.

But as a conversation starter I wouldn't say it was creepy. If I wasn't interested in the person I would say that and either block or simply disengage from the messages.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt. "

Other people spoiling people enjoyment once again.

Why should you change what you do because of some one who just got it wrong. It’s him that made you feel creeped out, not your fault.

You wouldn’t get this if you’d shopped in Sainsburys….

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!"

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *D of funCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

That is creepy

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I was in work and helping a customer. I saw a women trying to catch my eye and it was pretty obvious what she was doing.

After I'd finished helping the customer, I went over to her to see if she needed any assistance.

She asked if we could chat privately. I agreed as a common request in my job and all rooms have CCTV.

We sat opposite to each other and she mentioned that she had been visiting the office over the last few weeks and liked me.

She produced a carrier bag with some " professional photos " in and asked my opinion on them.

I could feel myself begin to sweat and feeling really uncomfortable. I didn't comment on them and quickly made an exit saying I had a meeting.

She never returned but made sure HR were aware.

True Story.

Be wary, very wary my friend- you’ve done the right thing but definitely keep an eye out for her."

Thanks. It happened a few years ago and security/cctv are aware.

She came in few times over the years but staff know her and not to put her through to me.

Crazy thing was. My bosses weren't to bothered about it until after the company gave personal boundaries/ safe guarding courses to staff.

I told them about my experience and she queried the outcome.

The trainer was furious and had a very stern conversation with bosses as it was abit of a joke between staff.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

She denied it was her and he kept going. That’s when it became creepy.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I had it once after having a face pic public for a mere hour! It was sainsbury's, he'd spotted me from the other side of the self-checkout and messaged by the time I'd got home.

That's a better way of putting it. Thanks.

It freaked you out. You realised something.

There's no need for blame to be attached to either party and definitely no need for labels like 'creeps' ..

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *exy4youxxWoman
over a year ago

Pontefract

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

I disagree he may be contacting her through a contact system BUT it does not give him the right to make her feel uncomfortable through this contact system it's like saying bullying can be done online because they are using a contact system...

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I took my face pic off when some guy approached me in a pub run by my friends, and tried to start conversation and mentioned fab, quite loudly. He got banned from the pub. And i denied it was me

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

She denied it was her and he kept going. That’s when it became creepy."

Interesting. He is right. She is lying. So he is creepy......

Nope... Still doesn't work for me.

I do get what you are saying but it's not creepy - unaware maybe but not creepy.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Op. Can I please send you a DM sometime?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's an unwritten code in swinging, which shouldn't need explaining. If you don't get it you shouldn't be doing it.

I sort of giggled at that. Is that wrong of me?

What is the 'unwritten code' and how do we get to know it ?

How do you know it ?

What is it we shouldn't be doing if we don't get it ?

Are you a Mason ?"

Everyone could be different but emmm if you read up you see I posted it

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

"I'm not sure how they do it. They must study a face in inordinate detail. I wouldn't be able to pick people out like that from glancing at a photo on here.

There's always going to be the strange kind of guy on here. Only swap faces once you've been chatting

I must have one of those faces! Once seen never forgotten lol! As I say it happens alot! But I don't find it creepy at all I find it intriguing! When they approach me in work I giggle but explain I can't stop and chat as have to try and pick 185 an hour! Not easy lol x

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *bwgirlygirlWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Urgh that's so creepy!

I don't have a face pic, but a guy approached me in the street the other week and asked if I was (previous username). Freaked me a bit. I just said no, what're you talking about and left. Sharpish. "

He's going to know it was you now

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

Poor analogy. Totally unrelated.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"If it makes you feel creeped out then those are your feelings and we shouldn't seek to dismiss them but I do think it needs exploring as to why it makes you feel that way.

If they repeatedly said they'd seen you somewhere. A pattern of behaviour as such then yes, creepy!

If they said they followed you about a bit, then you. Creepy.

But as a conversation starter I wouldn't say it was creepy. If I wasn't interested in the person I would say that and either block or simply disengage from the messages. "

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

She denied it was her and he kept going. That’s when it became creepy.

Interesting. He is right. She is lying. So he is creepy......

Nope... Still doesn't work for me.

I do get what you are saying but it's not creepy - unaware maybe but not creepy. "

I did lie and he was correct, it was me but wouldn’t you get the huge hints that this person is uncomfortable and leave it there?

Imagine messaging this to someone (I won’t but in the detail this guy did).

“Was that you in xxxx at 8pm wearing xxxx? I was behind you in the queue”

“No sorry, wasn’t me, must be someone who looks like me”

“No, it was definitely you, you bought xxxx and was wearing xxxx”

“No, it wasn’t me”

“ I know it was you, I was right behind you, you were talking to your friend”

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *elshman78Man
over a year ago

South Wales

I’ve recognised a few from here on my days out.

I’ve never felt the need to rush to a keyboard to tell them or go & chat for that matter.

It’s life

Everyone is different.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

She denied it was her and he kept going. That’s when it became creepy.

Interesting. He is right. She is lying. So he is creepy......

Nope... Still doesn't work for me.

I do get what you are saying but it's not creepy - unaware maybe but not creepy. "

You might be right, he might be unaware and his intentions might be purely innocent and if they are I apologise. I know if we received those messages my wife would find them creepy though.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *bwgirlygirlWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

I don't think putting a forum post up where people who are possibly stalking you is a good idea

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is getting off track.

Op. No offence at all meant by this, but I’ve only got your side of the story here.

A guy, may at one time in his life just mess up and get it all wrong because he sees an opportunity to break the ice with an attractive girl. He didn’t think it was creepy… he probably would if you told him.

Maybe that’s it, and you’ve worried about nothing.

*also, bullying is not sending a message to chat someone up. How it’s now bullying? I will never know.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

She denied it was her and he kept going. That’s when it became creepy.

Interesting. He is right. She is lying. So he is creepy......

Nope... Still doesn't work for me.

I do get what you are saying but it's not creepy - unaware maybe but not creepy.

I did lie and he was correct, it was me but wouldn’t you get the huge hints that this person is uncomfortable and leave it there?

Imagine messaging this to someone (I won’t but in the detail this guy did).

“Was that you in xxxx at 8pm wearing xxxx? I was behind you in the queue”

“No sorry, wasn’t me, must be someone who looks like me”

“No, it was definitely you, you bought xxxx and was wearing xxxx”

“No, it wasn’t me”

“ I know it was you, I was right behind you, you were talking to your friend”

Or, delete and block after the first message he sent. Why even reply?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't think putting a forum post up where people who are possibly stalking you is a good idea

I’m not implying that anyone is stalking me. I just don’t know why they feel the need to immediately fire off a message “I saw you, I saw you!”.

It makes me feel very uneasy.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

She denied it was her and he kept going. That’s when it became creepy.

Interesting. He is right. She is lying. So he is creepy......

Nope... Still doesn't work for me.

I do get what you are saying but it's not creepy - unaware maybe but not creepy.

I did lie and he was correct, it was me but wouldn’t you get the huge hints that this person is uncomfortable and leave it there?

Imagine messaging this to someone (I won’t but in the detail this guy did).

“Was that you in xxxx at 8pm wearing xxxx? I was behind you in the queue”

“No sorry, wasn’t me, must be someone who looks like me”

“No, it was definitely you, you bought xxxx and was wearing xxxx”

“No, it wasn’t me”

“ I know it was you, I was right behind you, you were talking to your friend”

Or, delete and block after the first message he sent. Why even reply?

I wrongly assumed that he’d just say “ah ok, must be someone who looks like you, enjoy your evening”.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *bwgirlygirlWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"I don't think putting a forum post up where people who are possibly stalking you is a good idea

I’m not implying that anyone is stalking me. I just don’t know why they feel the need to immediately fire off a message “I saw you, I saw you!”.

It makes me feel very uneasy. "

Well after this forum post they just might

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"This is getting off track.

Op. No offence at all meant by this, but I’ve only got your side of the story here.

Maybe that’s it, and you’ve worried about nothing.

*also, bullying is not sending a message to chat someone up. How it’s now bullying? I will never know. "

Cos Woody .... ( all fairness to the O.P. she never used these words )

People love a bit of drama.

Anyone saying anything = bully. Someone sending a message = creep. Man fancies woman and says he saw her somewhere = stalker.

It's pretty scary that 'adults' believe this. Soon the purge......

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"This particular guy said “I’ve just seen you in blah blah with your mate”, I denied it, he then went on to argue that he knew it was me and was going to come over but didn’t (thank god!!) "

And say what?? Hiya - seen you on a swingers sex site - can i buy you a drink then shag you and your mate… or is now a bad time??

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This is getting off track.

Op. No offence at all meant by this, but I’ve only got your side of the story here.

Maybe that’s it, and you’ve worried about nothing.

*also, bullying is not sending a message to chat someone up. How it’s now bullying? I will never know. "

I’m not worried, it made me feel uneasy. Those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly).

My fault for having face pics (they’ve now gone).

I’m future, I will not engage and will block and delete immediately.

I’m not being stalked or bullied, I just felt unnerved and it happens more frequently than I’d like.

I don’t understand the thought behind sending those kind of messages, but obviously the sender has their reasons.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I don't think putting a forum post up where people who are possibly stalking you is a good idea

I’m not implying that anyone is stalking me. I just don’t know why they feel the need to immediately fire off a message “I saw you, I saw you!”.

It makes me feel very uneasy. "

No. 100% you didn't use those words. Others decided to pile in label it something it isn't.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple
over a year ago

Coventry

It just seems totally bad etiquette and a total lack of empathy to inform someone off here you don't know that you've recognised them out in the real world. Some people have no respect or understanding how that makes people feel. Plus I think some people do get a creepy kick out of informing people. It's just a bit of a dickish thing to do IMO.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This particular guy said “I’ve just seen you in blah blah with your mate”, I denied it, he then went on to argue that he knew it was me and was going to come over but didn’t (thank god!!)

And say what?? Hiya - seen you on a swingers sex site - can i buy you a drink then shag you and your mate… or is now a bad time??

“Hi, I recognise you from fab”

Cue friend or even worse, family member, asking “what’s fab? How does this man know you?”

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It just seems totally bad etiquette and a total lack of empathy to inform someone off here you don't know that you've recognised them out in the real world. Some people have no respect or understanding how that makes people feel. Plus I think some people do get a creepy kick out of informing people. It's just a bit of a dickish thing to do IMO."

I think so, it makes me very uneasy.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"This is getting off track.

Op. No offence at all meant by this, but I’ve only got your side of the story here.

Maybe that’s it, and you’ve worried about nothing.

*also, bullying is not sending a message to chat someone up. How it’s now bullying? I will never know.

Cos Woody .... ( all fairness to the O.P. she never used these words )

People love a bit of drama.

Anyone saying anything = bully. Someone sending a message = creep. Man fancies woman and says he saw her somewhere = stalker.

It's pretty scary that 'adults' believe this. Soon the purge...... "

Absolutely this….

Ps just saw you through your bedroom window - i prefer the peach top with the green jeans

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had something similar happen a couple of weeks ago, someone I didn't know was a member of the site recognised me and then sent a screenshot to a friend of mine to confirm. So much for a bit of privacy and respect. We are all here for different reasons but privacy is what we all should have in common.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

She denied it was her and he kept going. That’s when it became creepy.

Interesting. He is right. She is lying. So he is creepy......

Nope... Still doesn't work for me.

I do get what you are saying but it's not creepy - unaware maybe but not creepy.

I did lie and he was correct, it was me but wouldn’t you get the huge hints that this person is uncomfortable and leave it there?

Imagine messaging this to someone (I won’t but in the detail this guy did).

“Was that you in xxxx at 8pm wearing xxxx? I was behind you in the queue”

“No sorry, wasn’t me, must be someone who looks like me”

“No, it was definitely you, you bought xxxx and was wearing xxxx”

“No, it wasn’t me”

“ I know it was you, I was right behind you, you were talking to your friend”

Or, delete and block after the first message he sent. Why even reply?

I wrongly assumed that he’d just say “ah ok, must be someone who looks like you, enjoy your evening”."

You reply to all messages I take it then?

You say he should of stopped and left it at that as it clearly made you uncomfortable, if it made you uncomfortable don't engage with the guy.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve only popped to sainsburys……has he been labelled an axe murderer yet?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

She denied it was her and he kept going. That’s when it became creepy.

Interesting. He is right. She is lying. So he is creepy......

Nope... Still doesn't work for me.

I do get what you are saying but it's not creepy - unaware maybe but not creepy.

I did lie and he was correct, it was me but wouldn’t you get the huge hints that this person is uncomfortable and leave it there?

Imagine messaging this to someone (I won’t but in the detail this guy did).

“Was that you in xxxx at 8pm wearing xxxx? I was behind you in the queue”

“No sorry, wasn’t me, must be someone who looks like me”

“No, it was definitely you, you bought xxxx and was wearing xxxx”

“No, it wasn’t me”

“ I know it was you, I was right behind you, you were talking to your friend”

Or, delete and block after the first message he sent. Why even reply?

I wrongly assumed that he’d just say “ah ok, must be someone who looks like you, enjoy your evening”.

You reply to all messages I take it then?

You say he should of stopped and left it at that as it clearly made you uncomfortable, if it made you uncomfortable don't engage with the guy.

I don’t reply to the graphic or abusive messages, no.

I will reply if it’s a polite message. Although the content unnerved me, it wasn’t offensive and I don’t think the sender meant any malice. It was MY feelings that I’m talking about. I literally thought he’d just say “ah ok” but he didn’t.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I feel creeped out when it happens, those are my feelings (rightly or wrongly), I just don’t like it.

It won’t happen again. Now if it was my own fault for having face pics, maybe, maybe not.

I certainly won’t be putting any more up! Lesson learnt.

Sorry for talking about you as if you’re not here but…

This is why I’ve said what I’ve said on this post.

Women shouldn’t have to alter their behaviour because some men are creeps.

I have a wife and 3 sisters who have all had creepy experiences. From online behaviour to literally being chased down the street.

This isn’t white knighting it’s just something I feel strongly about. Don’t be a creep!

I agree with most of what you say but NOT the word 'creeps' . That is a derogatory term attached to a man for doing no more than contacting someone through a contact system. .....

A man contacting a woman does not = creep.

She denied it was her and he kept going. That’s when it became creepy.

Interesting. He is right. She is lying. So he is creepy......

Nope... Still doesn't work for me.

I do get what you are saying but it's not creepy - unaware maybe but not creepy.

I did lie and he was correct, it was me but wouldn’t you get the huge hints that this person is uncomfortable and leave it there?

Imagine messaging this to someone (I won’t but in the detail this guy did).

“Was that you in xxxx at 8pm wearing xxxx? I was behind you in the queue”

“No sorry, wasn’t me, must be someone who looks like me”

“No, it was definitely you, you bought xxxx and was wearing xxxx”

“No, it wasn’t me”

“ I know it was you, I was right behind you, you were talking to your friend”

I'd get the hint yes.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *empmanMan
over a year ago

Newton aycliffe

[Removed by poster at 08/08/22 08:52:10]

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"This particular guy said “I’ve just seen you in blah blah with your mate”, I denied it, he then went on to argue that he knew it was me and was going to come over but didn’t (thank god!!)

And say what?? Hiya - seen you on a swingers sex site - can i buy you a drink then shag you and your mate… or is now a bad time??

“Hi, I recognise you from fab”

Cue friend or even worse, family member, asking “what’s fab? How does this man know you?”"
exactly - if i bump into you outside and you’re on your own i might say Morning… then later - message you and say - see that. Stunning looking fella that said ‘morning ‘ earlier as he slowly seductively slid his petrol pump into his car….. that was me!!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I’ve only popped to sainsburys……has he been labelled an axe murderer yet? "

Not quite but there are a few pushing us that way .

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"[Removed by poster at 08/08/22 08:52:10]"

'massage' snigger

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"This particular guy said “I’ve just seen you in blah blah with your mate”, I denied it, he then went on to argue that he knew it was me and was going to come over but didn’t (thank god!!)

And say what?? Hiya - seen you on a swingers sex site - can i buy you a drink then shag you and your mate… or is now a bad time??

“Hi, I recognise you from fab”

Cue friend or even worse, family member, asking “what’s fab? How does this man know you?” exactly - if i bump into you outside and you’re on your own i might say Morning… then later - message you and say - see that. Stunning looking fella that said ‘morning ‘ earlier as he slowly seductively slid his petrol pump into his car….. that was me!!

As he dribbled on his shoes...........

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *empmanMan
over a year ago

Newton aycliffe

"I messaged someone the other day asking if I'd seen them at the dentists. got nice reply saying no but it's started a 2 way conversation about a meet. Am I a creep?

I don't know. Did you ask her how many fillings she had ? That'd be creepy

no it was a simple did I see you at the dentist today

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"This particular guy said “I’ve just seen you in blah blah with your mate”, I denied it, he then went on to argue that he knew it was me and was going to come over but didn’t (thank god!!)

And say what?? Hiya - seen you on a swingers sex site - can i buy you a drink then shag you and your mate… or is now a bad time??

“Hi, I recognise you from fab”

As he dribbled on his shoes........... "

Marry me!!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *iltsTSgirlTV/TS
over a year ago

chichester

Had a guy take a picture of me once when I was out. Then message me later to say I like your outfit and proceeded to send me the picture.

I don’t really show my face pics that much now on here publicly , have had this stuff happen over 20 times in here since 2010 .

Man if I could catch them I would be getting hyper violent in a second

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"This particular guy said “I’ve just seen you in blah blah with your mate”, I denied it, he then went on to argue that he knew it was me and was going to come over but didn’t (thank god!!)

And say what?? Hiya - seen you on a swingers sex site - can i buy you a drink then shag you and your mate… or is now a bad time??

“Hi, I recognise you from fab”

Cue friend or even worse, family member, asking “what’s fab? How does this man know you?”"

Would you just not say 'dobtvknow what you're on about' and walk away?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *eneralKenobiMan
over a year ago

North Angus

I’ve bumped into a few folk from here in Asda

There’s no way I’d could be that creepy though. Those lads mentioned need a slap in the dish

Thankfully the ones I bumped into, I’d spoken to for quite some time before so it was just a friendly “hello” and carry on.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"This is getting off track.

Op. No offence at all meant by this, but I’ve only got your side of the story here.

Maybe that’s it, and you’ve worried about nothing.

*also, bullying is not sending a message to chat someone up. How it’s now bullying? I will never know.

Cos Woody .... ( all fairness to the O.P. she never used these words )

People love a bit of drama.

Anyone saying anything = bully. Someone sending a message = creep. Man fancies woman and says he saw her somewhere = stalker.

It's pretty scary that 'adults' believe this. Soon the purge......

Absolutely this….

Ps just saw you through your bedroom window - i prefer the peach top with the green jeans

Christ's sake Todger... Can't you just message me in private! Now everyone knows I wear green jeans !

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

"I’ve bumped into a few folk from here in Asda

There’s no way I’d could be that creepy though. Those lads mentioned need a slap in the dish

Thankfully the ones I bumped into, I’d spoken to for quite some time before so it was just a friendly “hello” and carry on.

Why are they creepy and deserving of violent acts against them?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I’ve bumped into a few folk from here in Asda

There’s no way I’d could be that creepy though. Those lads mentioned need a slap in the dish

Thankfully the ones I bumped into, I’d spoken to for quite some time before so it was just a friendly “hello” and carry on.

Love it.

You learned it here folks. Treat messages with potential violence!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I didn’t have my “who’s near” turned on (never do).

I wasn’t on fab at the time (saw it when I got home)

So how much has this guy studied my face (which I shouldn’t have had on here) to recognise me, a person he’s never met!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I’ve bumped into a few folk from here in Asda

There’s no way I’d could be that creepy though. Those lads mentioned need a slap in the dish

Thankfully the ones I bumped into, I’d spoken to for quite some time before so it was just a friendly “hello” and carry on.

Why are they creepy and deserving of violent acts against them?"

Stop it Evie !!! Stop I say.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *eneralKenobiMan
over a year ago

North Angus

"I’ve bumped into a few folk from here in Asda

There’s no way I’d could be that creepy though. Those lads mentioned need a slap in the dish

Thankfully the ones I bumped into, I’d spoken to for quite some time before so it was just a friendly “hello” and carry on.

Why are they creepy and deserving of violent acts against them?"

Leering on anyone In a public setting is creepy

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I’ve bumped into a few folk from here in Asda

There’s no way I’d could be that creepy though. Those lads mentioned need a slap in the dish

Thankfully the ones I bumped into, I’d spoken to for quite some time before so it was just a friendly “hello” and carry on.

Why are they creepy and deserving of violent acts against them?

Leering on anyone In a public setting is creepy "

Jesus ....... why say he looked when we can get him to leer.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This particular guy said “I’ve just seen you in blah blah with your mate”, I denied it, he then went on to argue that he knew it was me and was going to come over but didn’t (thank god!!)

And say what?? Hiya - seen you on a swingers sex site - can i buy you a drink then shag you and your mate… or is now a bad time??

“Hi, I recognise you from fab”

Cue friend or even worse, family member, asking “what’s fab? How does this man know you?”

Would you just not say 'dobtvknow what you're on about' and walk away?

Well he wouldn’t accept my denial in message form, would he take it in real life?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"This is getting off track.

Op. No offence at all meant by this, but I’ve only got your side of the story here.

Maybe that’s it, and you’ve worried about nothing.

*also, bullying is not sending a message to chat someone up. How it’s now bullying? I will never know.

Cos Woody .... ( all fairness to the O.P. she never used these words )

People love a bit of drama.

Anyone saying anything = bully. Someone sending a message = creep. Man fancies woman and says he saw her somewhere = stalker.

It's pretty scary that 'adults' believe this. Soon the purge......

Absolutely this….

Ps just saw you through your bedroom window - i prefer the peach top with the green jeans

Christ's sake Todger... Can't you just message me in private! Now everyone knows I wear green jeans !"
but I didn’t mention you were going commando!!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Why do they need to message though, to say they’ve seen you?

Did you leave your chips ?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy? "

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

sorry ...... fries

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why do they need to message though, to say they’ve seen you?

Did you leave your chips ?"

It was an egg muffin meal, I ain’t leaving that behind for no fucker

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ve bumped into a few folk from here in Asda

There’s no way I’d could be that creepy though. Those lads mentioned need a slap in the dish

Thankfully the ones I bumped into, I’d spoken to for quite some time before so it was just a friendly “hello” and carry on.

Love it.

You learned it here folks. Treat messages with potential violence!"

Don’t condone violence but just like yous treat people by choice to icnore them and clame your a good person ??? I see though the bs

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy? "

Don't be daft...... he'd be asked over for the once over and a bag of chips..

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Joke !

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes."

Uneasy but a little more palatable?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"This is getting off track.

Op. No offence at all meant by this, but I’ve only got your side of the story here.

Maybe that’s it, and you’ve worried about nothing.

*also, bullying is not sending a message to chat someone up. How it’s now bullying? I will never know.

Cos Woody .... ( all fairness to the O.P. she never used these words )

People love a bit of drama.

Anyone saying anything = bully. Someone sending a message = creep. Man fancies woman and says he saw her somewhere = stalker.

It's pretty scary that 'adults' believe this. Soon the purge......

Absolutely this….

Ps just saw you through your bedroom window - i prefer the peach top with the green jeans

Christ's sake Todger... Can't you just message me in private! Now everyone knows I wear green jeans ! but I didn’t mention you were going commando!!

That tree has a preservation order on it ..... seems to have one more branch than yesterday

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

I had this happen at work. From a couple's profile, freaked me out a little as there were no face pics, it wasn't until a couple of weeks later that I found out who it was from, when the lady dropped a passing comment

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By *omblingFreeCouple
over a year ago

The Village

to anyone staring just say at the top of your voice "Do you think you recognise me from a sex site or something?"

mrs

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable? "

No. It’s tough for me to actually know because these guys have all been either silhouettes or disembodied dicks so they haven’t identified themselves.

I do think though that even a hot guy would be one a whole lot less hot if he sent a message like that and made me feel uneasy.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable? "

Jeez Rex. It's like you read my mind

I swear I wrote that somewhere up there ^^^...

It's always going to be more palatable if it is someone that someone finds attractive. And always going to be more creepy if it is coming from someone faceless and nameless.

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By *ashful_at_firstMan
over a year ago

Canterbury

Had someone message me, saying "what would your friend say if I showed your pics round the rugby club?" - but hid his username, in fact all his identity; I guess if he`s trying to embarrass me then he`s on here too, so it`s a double edged sword...

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable?

Jeez Rex. It's like you read my mind

I swear I wrote that somewhere up there ^^^...

It's always going to be more palatable if it is someone that someone finds attractive. And always going to be more creepy if it is coming from someone faceless and nameless."
What are you wearing ?

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"This is getting off track.

Op. No offence at all meant by this, but I’ve only got your side of the story here.

Maybe that’s it, and you’ve worried about nothing.

*also, bullying is not sending a message to chat someone up. How it’s now bullying? I will never know.

Cos Woody .... ( all fairness to the O.P. she never used these words )

People love a bit of drama.

Anyone saying anything = bully. Someone sending a message = creep. Man fancies woman and says he saw her somewhere = stalker.

It's pretty scary that 'adults' believe this. Soon the purge......

Absolutely this….

Ps just saw you through your bedroom window - i prefer the peach top with the green jeans

Christ's sake Todger... Can't you just message me in private! Now everyone knows I wear green jeans ! but I didn’t mention you were going commando!!

That tree has a preservation order on it ..... seems to have one more branch than yesterday"
meh… more a twig but thanks gor building me up!!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Had someone message me, saying "what would your friend say if I showed your pics round the rugby club?" - but hid his username, in fact all his identity; I guess if he`s trying to embarrass me then he`s on here too, so it`s a double edged sword..."

How do you hide your username ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

very creepy ... we had a guy one year say oh i seen you today and i said thats not possible as ive been home all day he said i know i was peeking thru your window and saw you totally freaked me out as i was home alone ...hubby came homelater and there was footprints in the border garden in front of the window .... freaked me out and we moved not long after that .... was never sure if he was telling the truth because as at the time we had 2 dogs that were super super alert ...

this house has cctv front sides back and covering the gardens and drive ...

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *dam_TinaCouple
over a year ago

Hampshire

We were on cam once and a guy wrote the name of the company we worked for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We had someone message us who said he could work out where we lived because he worked for the developer who built our house. He’d used the “see who’s near” feature and recognised part of our house in one of our pics.

I guess that’s not creepy either

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable?

Jeez Rex. It's like you read my mind

I swear I wrote that somewhere up there ^^^...

It's always going to be more palatable if it is someone that someone finds attractive. And always going to be more creepy if it is coming from someone faceless and nameless."

I don’t even think it’s about the guy being attractive. It’s like the guy in the scream mask “I’m watching you, you’re eating noodles”. What makes it creepy is that you don’t know who it is (in the film!).

It’s the “being watched by an unknown” that makes up part of it.

The second is the “mixing this world and real life” feeling (my fault for having face pics).

Then it’s the “why send that message? Who would do that?”.

Let’s just say, it’s multifaceted and I don’t like it!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable?

Jeez Rex. It's like you read my mind

I swear I wrote that somewhere up there ^^^...

It's always going to be more palatable if it is someone that someone finds attractive. And always going to be more creepy if it is coming from someone faceless and nameless. What are you wearing ?"

Graaaaannnnnnyyyyyyyy

You're not allowed to try and give me the creeps. Plus... "what are you wearing?"... not creepy. "That blue top looks nice"... creepy. Because I'm wearing a blue top and now I'd be wondering how you know.

Doesn't make you a creep, but it is creepy.

It's like getting a message saying "I know what you did last summer". Creepy as fuck if a stranger does it (plus you're totally getting murdered), less so if Rex does it (because he knows exactly what I was doing last summer

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable?

Jeez Rex. It's like you read my mind

I swear I wrote that somewhere up there ^^^...

It's always going to be more palatable if it is someone that someone finds attractive. And always going to be more creepy if it is coming from someone faceless and nameless.

It’s the “being watched by an unknown” that makes up part of it.

The second is the “mixing this world and real life” feeling (my fault for having face pics).

Then it’s the “why send that message? Who would do that?”.

Let’s just say, it’s multifaceted and I don’t like it! "
problem is you’re relying on people to show good judgement and act appropriately in public- not going yo happen is it - just look at your inbox and the level of self control and respect thats evident in there - then imagine thats the person who comes across you in real life even for 30 seconds - thats when you get the creepy… I saw you.. messages and creepy because he doesn’t attach a face pic and say Hiya - pretty sure I saw you in **** - i would have said hi but you were with someone and it could have been awkward ….

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable?

Jeez Rex. It's like you read my mind

I swear I wrote that somewhere up there ^^^...

It's always going to be more palatable if it is someone that someone finds attractive. And always going to be more creepy if it is coming from someone faceless and nameless.

It’s the “being watched by an unknown” that makes up part of it.

The second is the “mixing this world and real life” feeling (my fault for having face pics).

Then it’s the “why send that message? Who would do that?”.

Let’s just say, it’s multifaceted and I don’t like it! problem is you’re relying on people to show good judgement and act appropriately in public- not going yo happen is it - just look at your inbox and the level of self control and respect thats evident in there - then imagine thats the person who comes across you in real life even for 30 seconds - thats when you get the creepy… I saw you.. messages and creepy because he doesn’t attach a face pic and say Hiya - pretty sure I saw you in **** - i would have said hi but you were with someone and it could have been awkward …. "

Very true. I would not want to meet 80% of my inbox in real life!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ve bumped into a few folk from here in Asda

There’s no way I’d could be that creepy though. Those lads mentioned need a slap in the dish

Thankfully the ones I bumped into, I’d spoken to for quite some time before so it was just a friendly “hello” and carry on.

Why are they creepy and deserving of violent acts against them?

Leering on anyone In a public setting is creepy

Jesus ....... why say he looked when we can get him to leer. "

There is a marked difference between looking and leering

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One of the perils of having a face pic I suppose, is that people may recognise you. That’s not the purpose of this post though.

How do you feel about those who then message you and tell you “I’ve just seen you in Asda with your mate, you were wearing a pink dress…..”?

I’m personally always creeped out and thinking I need to take off my face pics but how do you feel if it’s ever happened to you?

I get it more often than I’d like.

A guy was even watching my friend and I eat lunch!! He sat staring the whole time, then messaged later! "

I think it’s extremely alarming and this person isn’t wired up right mentally to think messaging you wouldn’t freak you out !! This place is not the same as social media look at the fucked up requests we’ve probably all received here at one point or another, I think their actions are weird and don’t blame you for taking any face pictures down I did within my first day here after receiving a text message from somebody I’d done work for saying they’d seen me on here, you only have to switch the news on and you see the fucked up actions of crazy individuals !!

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable?

Jeez Rex. It's like you read my mind

I swear I wrote that somewhere up there ^^^...

It's always going to be more palatable if it is someone that someone finds attractive. And always going to be more creepy if it is coming from someone faceless and nameless.

It’s the “being watched by an unknown” that makes up part of it.

The second is the “mixing this world and real life” feeling (my fault for having face pics).

Then it’s the “why send that message? Who would do that?”.

Let’s just say, it’s multifaceted and I don’t like it! "

That's bollocks. It isn't your fault, it is no one's fault. Because the person sending isn't in your head and doesn't know he is creeping you out and you don't like it, and you're not in his head and don't know he would likely be mortified to be reading that he has creeped you out.

You want to show your face, show your face. But expect people to attempt to make a connection somehow. That's all he is doing.

I'm not saying you're wrong for feeling as you do, you're not wrong. Your feelings are valid. But I don't think he is wrong for messaging the first time (after you said it wasn't you I feel he should have backed off, maybe gone with "ah well, if you ever fancy a date let's meet in the Asda cafe") as he is just trying to get your attention.

At least he didn't rock up at your front door at 10.30 at night because he knows where you live (despite being a total stranger).

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable?

Jeez Rex. It's like you read my mind

I swear I wrote that somewhere up there ^^^...

It's always going to be more palatable if it is someone that someone finds attractive. And always going to be more creepy if it is coming from someone faceless and nameless.

It’s the “being watched by an unknown” that makes up part of it.

The second is the “mixing this world and real life” feeling (my fault for having face pics).

Then it’s the “why send that message? Who would do that?”.

Very true. I would not want to meet 80% of my inbox in real life! "
#smashedit - made the 20%

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’ve bumped into a few folk from here in Asda

There’s no way I’d could be that creepy though. Those lads mentioned need a slap in the dish

Thankfully the ones I bumped into, I’d spoken to for quite some time before so it was just a friendly “hello” and carry on.

Why are they creepy and deserving of violent acts against them?

Leering on anyone In a public setting is creepy

Jesus ....... why say he looked when we can get him to leer.

There is a marked difference between looking and leering "

Staring is the word I’d use for the guy in the restaurant. Not sure if that’s leering or not but he was definitely staring.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable?

Jeez Rex. It's like you read my mind

I swear I wrote that somewhere up there ^^^...

It's always going to be more palatable if it is someone that someone finds attractive. And always going to be more creepy if it is coming from someone faceless and nameless.

It’s the “being watched by an unknown” that makes up part of it.

The second is the “mixing this world and real life” feeling (my fault for having face pics).

Then it’s the “why send that message? Who would do that?”.

Let’s just say, it’s multifaceted and I don’t like it!

You want to show your face, show your face. But expect people to attempt to make a connection somehow. That's all he is doing.

At least he didn't rock up at your front door at 10.30 at night because he knows where you live (despite being a total stranger)."
is 10:15 ok?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable?

Jeez Rex. It's like you read my mind

I swear I wrote that somewhere up there ^^^...

It's always going to be more palatable if it is someone that someone finds attractive. And always going to be more creepy if it is coming from someone faceless and nameless.

It’s the “being watched by an unknown” that makes up part of it.

The second is the “mixing this world and real life” feeling (my fault for having face pics).

Then it’s the “why send that message? Who would do that?”.

Let’s just say, it’s multifaceted and I don’t like it!

You want to show your face, show your face. But expect people to attempt to make a connection somehow. That's all he is doing.

At least he didn't rock up at your front door at 10.30 at night because he knows where you live (despite being a total stranger). is 10:15 ok?

Only if you want the same reaction the last guy got

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"If it were the man of your dreams would it still be classed as creepy?

It would still make me feel uneasy, yes.

Uneasy but a little more palatable?

Jeez Rex. It's like you read my mind

I swear I wrote that somewhere up there ^^^...

It's always going to be more palatable if it is someone that someone finds attractive. And always going to be more creepy if it is coming from someone faceless and nameless.

It’s the “being watched by an unknown” that makes up part of it.

The second is the “mixing this world and real life” feeling (my fault for having face pics).

Then it’s the “why send that message? Who would do that?”.

Let’s just say, it’s multifaceted and I don’t like it!

You want to show your face, show your face. But expect people to attempt to make a connection somehow. That's all he is doing.

At least he didn't rock up at your front door at 10.30 at night because he knows where you live (despite being a total stranger). is 10:15 ok?

Only if you want the same reaction the last guy got

"
it wasn’t tea & a hob nob was it?? #poshbiscuits

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I’ve bumped into a few folk from here in Asda

There’s no way I’d could be that creepy though. Those lads mentioned need a slap in the dish

Thankfully the ones I bumped into, I’d spoken to for quite some time before so it was just a friendly “hello” and carry on.

Why are they creepy and deserving of violent acts against them?

Leering on anyone In a public setting is creepy

Jesus ....... why say he looked when we can get him to leer.

There is a marked difference between looking and leering

Staring is the word I’d use for the guy in the restaurant. Not sure if that’s leering or not but he was definitely staring. "

oooo I like superlatives....

peep, glance, look, good look, stare, long hard stare, leer, fucking good look.....

Stare is pretty bad... it's pretty high up there.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Are you two flirting in front of my eyes in the middle of a thread ?

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

At least he didn't rock up at your front door at 10.30 at night because he knows where you live (despite being a total stranger). is 10:15 ok?

Only if you want the same reaction the last guy got

it wasn’t tea & a hob nob was it?? #poshbiscuits"

Fuck no. I yelled at him to get the fuck away, did he not realise how fucking inappropriate that was, who the fuck was he anyway and fuck off, fuck off, fuck off.

Then I slammed the door and burst into tears.

I mean, he was after a fuck and he got several of them, so even if that wasn't the type of fuck he was after, mission kind of accomplished I guess?

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

At least he didn't rock up at your front door at 10.30 at night because he knows where you live (despite being a total stranger). is 10:15 ok?

Only if you want the same reaction the last guy got

it wasn’t tea & a hob nob was it?? #poshbiscuits

Fuck no. I yelled at him to get the fuck away, did he not realise how fucking inappropriate that was, who the fuck was he anyway and fuck off, fuck off, fuck off.

Then I slammed the door and burst into tears.

I mean, he was after a fuck and he got several of them, so even if that wasn't the type of fuck he was after, mission kind of accomplished I guess?

Omg! I don’t even have words! Makes my Asda man seem like a dream!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *odgerMooreMan
over a year ago

Carlisle

"Are you two flirting in front of my eyes in the middle of a thread ?"
not me… I only have eyes for you Granny….and a couple of others… when I Say couple - like less than 10….. 20 at most or 30 at the very outside but definitely you and up to 50 others…max!!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At least he didn't rock up at your front door at 10.30 at night because he knows where you live (despite being a total stranger). is 10:15 ok?

Only if you want the same reaction the last guy got

it wasn’t tea & a hob nob was it?? #poshbiscuits

Fuck no. I yelled at him to get the fuck away, did he not realise how fucking inappropriate that was, who the fuck was he anyway and fuck off, fuck off, fuck off.

Then I slammed the door and burst into tears.

I mean, he was after a fuck and he got several of them, so even if that wasn't the type of fuck he was after, mission kind of accomplished I guess?

What an absolute weirdo

who actually does something like that ?? The thought progress of these people actually alarms me yet nothing surprises me !!

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I insist on the last word.

Liverpool Girl xxxx Stay Safe xxxx

(closed, thread got too big)

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By *icolerobbieCouple
over a year ago

walsall

Unless you are happy for your friends, family & colleagues to know that you are on a sex site or a swingers site, maybe hide your face pics. It’s all a bit like common sense.

If you want to be famous, then with fame comes certain inconveniences.

You can take responsibility for your own choices and own them.

(closed, thread got too big)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is getting off track.

Op. No offence at all meant by this, but I’ve only got your side of the story here.

Maybe that’s it, and you’ve worried about nothing.

*also, bullying is not sending a message to chat someone up. How it’s now bullying? I will never know.

Cos Woody .... ( all fairness to the O.P. she never used these words )

People love a bit of drama.

Anyone saying anything = bully. Someone sending a message = creep. Man fancies woman and says he saw her somewhere = stalker.

It's pretty scary that 'adults' believe this. Soon the purge...... "

I think this is a general issue. You said or did x which made me feel y. Therefore you must stop doing x.

Personally, up until x becomes illegal I think the onus is on us if we don't like something to take responsibility for not allowing it.

There's been comments of victim blaming but these miss a significant point, in this instance there isn't a victim, there is someone who feels mildly perturbed. Forgive me being facetious but I'm pretty sure there's no such thing as mildly perturbed person blaming.

Is a woman at fault if she's assaulted? No, never, not in any circumstances. Is a woman at fault if she feels uncomfortable after having have photos she has posted on a public site recognised? Yes. Yes, she really is.

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