Join us FREE, we're FREE to use
Web's largest swingers site since 2006.
Already registered?
Login here
![]() | Back to forum list |
![]() | Back to The Lounge |
Jump to newest | ![]() |
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
![]() | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"As someone that has been in some very dark places this year I'd echo this. Always, always speak out, fight for help. But let your friends know too, people are awesome and kind and supportive. I've had the worst 6 months of my life but it is offset with being humbled with the kindness of people. The only way too end the stigma of mental health is for more people to be open about it" Agreed as someone who suffers from mental health issues. Anxiety and Depression, theres to much stigma about it. Getting help is the first step and speaking about it, you'd be surprised at the amount of people who suffer from it. There's no shame on it and asking for help people. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Unfortunately when you are so far in that dark place, you feel like you can't talk to anyone ![]() Agreed its very hard been there myself loads of times. No one is a burden on others, it's always after you hear if they just said something. So remember folks check in on friends, that one message could make the world of difference. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Unfortunately when you are so far in that dark place, you feel like you can't talk to anyone ![]() its true but id add to that slightly to its hard to listen to the truth with all the noise from the demons going on keeping you in the dark also | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Unfortunately when you are so far in that dark place, you feel like you can't talk to anyone ![]() this was me last year | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Unfortunately when you are so far in that dark place, you feel like you can't talk to anyone ![]() I have never and never would open up to anyone. They have their own drama going on....its easier to just say "I'm fine" x | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Also there are so many mental health support groups out there both in person or online, there are lots of charities too. I worked with The Listening Place in London and only heard of them through word of mouth, being open with friends means people will offer practical support like those groups." Agree with you there. Unfortunately most of these aren't know or made aware to people. Even a quick Google search will help someone. Maybe talking to a stranger online rather than face to face will help someone. It might be easier to do, don't let the demons win. Remember we're all here for a reason no matter how big are small. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
![]() | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Unfortunately when you are so far in that dark place, you feel like you can't talk to anyone ![]() I deal better with other people's drama than my own. You can come to me/us and unload. In turn I am happy to tell you that I am fine. C | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"So after reading the sad news about bikerdrew. I seen someone had a status on their profile, they were struggling. So I've reached out saud to contact your doctor, samaritains and look up mind. So just to say to anyone struggling you're not alone. If you ever need to talk, your Auntie Wendi is here. Anyone that has other tips please post. No one needs to struggle alone." always good to keep repeating these messages. Too many people don't ask for help. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Unfortunately when you are so far in that dark place, you feel like you can't talk to anyone ![]() This is where I am, no point as everyone is so busy with their own life its not worth it , as the usual answers are " oh id love sometime on my own" or " there's worse off than you" a long weekend gone by and not one text from any of my so called friends. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I’ve asked for help and I get refused it so for some people it isn’t a case of not asking for help it’s the fact that even when they beg for that help they still don’t get it, I’ve given up now " That's very true. It's also not easy to keep asking when you keep getting rejected when you're not thinking straight | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I’ve asked for help and I get refused it so for some people it isn’t a case of not asking for help it’s the fact that even when they beg for that help they still don’t get it, I’ve given up now " We'll take you C | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I’ve asked for help and I get refused it so for some people it isn’t a case of not asking for help it’s the fact that even when they beg for that help they still don’t get it, I’ve given up now " It's a hard road, keep trying. Our daughter has anxiety & severe depression that leads to self harming & rage. We also get rejected for help as she isn't great at talking to strangers so they give up. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"As I said folks message me if you need someone to talk to it can be anything. I've been there myself. Yes it's hard. People jave their own life and problems. I know how it feels. I'm on new medication after going through a very bad year of depression. I know all my tell tale signs, when I'm not good. I choose to ignore them and carry on not talk seek help, I done more damage than good doing this. I know what the demons feel like, oh here they go again. Yes there are people worse off. That dosent mean your problems and struggles aren't real or important to you. All I'm trying to say is if you can't talk to the doctor or loved ones or friends. I'm here maybe a total stranger on the Internet might be a beckon that you need right now. X" Unfortunately due to experience on here, I would never confide in anyone. Can't trust people these days sadly x | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"As I said folks message me if you need someone to talk to it can be anything. I've been there myself. Yes it's hard. People jave their own life and problems. I know how it feels. I'm on new medication after going through a very bad year of depression. I know all my tell tale signs, when I'm not good. I choose to ignore them and carry on not talk seek help, I done more damage than good doing this. I know what the demons feel like, oh here they go again. Yes there are people worse off. That dosent mean your problems and struggles aren't real or important to you. All I'm trying to say is if you can't talk to the doctor or loved ones or friends. I'm here maybe a total stranger on the Internet might be a beckon that you need right now. X Unfortunately due to experience on here, I would never confide in anyone. Can't trust people these days sadly x" Totally understand, my point is to highlight people aren't alone. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Maybe we can have a sensible forum set up on fab for people that are struggling with links? Something admin can sort out? RIP Drew. We had a few good chats. " Agreed. Mental health isn't highlighted enough and is at it's capacity on the NHS. This thread is to highlight other ways for people to get help and to know there's people and places always willing to help and support you. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"The flipside to speaking out is people being kind and empathetic. And a lot of people on this forum need to reflect on that. Not with Drew, Drew was popular and liked but the reaction some single men receive on here when they show sine vulnerability is really negative and destructive particularly when it leads to a pile on of more and more posters trying to out do each other. Of course it's never on threads overtly about mental health, but the reaction a man got on here recently after posting about struggling with his weight abd fitness or when a man asks for profile feedback... People need to learn to be kind, actually be kind not just claim they are" Spot on. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"So after reading the sad news about bikerdrew. I seen someone had a status on their profile, they were struggling. So I've reached out saud to contact your doctor, samaritains and look up mind. So just to say to anyone struggling you're not alone. If you ever need to talk, your Auntie Wendi is here. Anyone that has other tips please post. No one needs to struggle alone." Great thread. If you are struggling with your mental health seek help. Don't suffer in silence. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Unfortunately when you are so far in that dark place, you feel like you can't talk to anyone ![]() Agreed I have people I can reach out to but did not stop me trying to end it a few years ago | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
![]() | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"As I said folks message me if you need someone to talk to it can be anything. I've been there myself. Yes it's hard. People jave their own life and problems. I know how it feels. I'm on new medication after going through a very bad year of depression. I know all my tell tale signs, when I'm not good. I choose to ignore them and carry on not talk seek help, I done more damage than good doing this. I know what the demons feel like, oh here they go again. Yes there are people worse off. That dosent mean your problems and struggles aren't real or important to you. All I'm trying to say is if you can't talk to the doctor or loved ones or friends. I'm here maybe a total stranger on the Internet might be a beckon that you need right now. X Unfortunately due to experience on here, I would never confide in anyone. Can't trust people these days sadly x" oi you | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"A lot of counsellors are rubbish and don't help much as they have tick sheets to fill out. They rarely help with the problem. " This applies to me, all they want to do is put me on meds which make me a zombie. No thanks! | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"As I said folks message me if you need someone to talk to it can be anything. I've been there myself. Yes it's hard. People jave their own life and problems. I know how it feels. I'm on new medication after going through a very bad year of depression. I know all my tell tale signs, when I'm not good. I choose to ignore them and carry on not talk seek help, I done more damage than good doing this. I know what the demons feel like, oh here they go again. Yes there are people worse off. That dosent mean your problems and struggles aren't real or important to you. All I'm trying to say is if you can't talk to the doctor or loved ones or friends. I'm here maybe a total stranger on the Internet might be a beckon that you need right now. X Unfortunately due to experience on here, I would never confide in anyone. Can't trust people these days sadly xoi you " It's true. Those you think are friends are the ones to stick the knives in first x | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"See the problem I have is seeing a decent doctor as most have no clue and just want to get you back out door, And it happened to me last week then bang downwards spiral again then see a decent doctor that’s listens is a hard process to keep going through " Most GPs can't do anything beyond mild low mood/anxiety/depression, and some aren't even comfortable with that. It's a huge hole in the care system. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"A lot of counsellors are rubbish and don't help much as they have tick sheets to fill out. They rarely help with the problem. The only way to solve it is face what the problem is. Figure out why it happened then confront it. " I’m training to be a counsellor and this makes me sad. Counselling can be a huge help, but you’ve got to have the right type of counselling for you and a good relationship with the counsellor. There’s certainly no tick boxes in the type I’m studying. Sadly if you’re reliant on the NHS then your options may be limited. Whilst your advice at the end is ok in theory, not everyone is strong enough or able to face things by themselves and some people have hugely complex issues that need somebody to help them tackle. Just in response to the comment further down too, counsellors do not diagnose or prescribe medication x | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"As I said folks message me if you need someone to talk to it can be anything. I've been there myself. Yes it's hard. People jave their own life and problems. I know how it feels. I'm on new medication after going through a very bad year of depression. I know all my tell tale signs, when I'm not good. I choose to ignore them and carry on not talk seek help, I done more damage than good doing this. I know what the demons feel like, oh here they go again. Yes there are people worse off. That dosent mean your problems and struggles aren't real or important to you. All I'm trying to say is if you can't talk to the doctor or loved ones or friends. I'm here maybe a total stranger on the Internet might be a beckon that you need right now. X Unfortunately due to experience on here, I would never confide in anyone. Can't trust people these days sadly xoi you It's true. Those you think are friends are the ones to stick the knives in first x" its not a knife ffs its a willy ![]() ![]() | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Been there a few time my self it’s hard to get back up all so have a daughter and sun days she just tell me she wants to die so live can be very hard at times" Fortunate she can talk to you Most of my family don't know the depth of the darkness as there is such a face on when talking to and distance means there is little they can do | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Been there a few time my self it’s hard to get back up all so have a daughter and sun days she just tell me she wants to die so live can be very hard at times Fortunate she can talk to you Most of my family don't know the depth of the darkness as there is such a face on when talking to and distance means there is little they can do " I had multiple friends that I was deployed with that are no longer here. You have to reach out to others silence is not a option. It breaks heart that one day everything is fine but you have a hidden agenda. That agenda is not a option. Hell I am a American you need a ear to lean on no matter what just message me. Hopefully we all can help one another in a crisis. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"It’s so hobbile to see her like it but I try my best " Am sure you do It can be just as hard on the friends and family trying to support | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
![]() | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Unfortunately when you are so far in that dark place, you feel like you can't talk to anyone ![]() Totally agree with both these points of view ![]() | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Unfortunately when you are so far in that dark place, you feel like you can't talk to anyone ![]() ![]() Agree with the second point as well. What keeps me fighting is friends yet I can't see myself the way they do | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I’ve asked for help and I get refused it so for some people it isn’t a case of not asking for help it’s the fact that even when they beg for that help they still don’t get it, I’ve given up now That's very true. It's also not easy to keep asking when you keep getting rejected when you're not thinking straight " Unfortunately, this is something I have experienced. I’m very good at putting on a brave face and masking the truth. Which makes it harder for friends to understand. Personally I’ve found talking to someone outside my social circle can be more helpful and supportive than confiding in a close friend. Also, I’ve found if you don’t have a mainstream belief or faith system it can be harder for professional services and charities who are often staffed and funded by mainstream religious bodies. That’s not a dig in any way, shape or form, just a personal experience. My DM’s are always open. If you need to talk in confidence please feel free to message. Look after yourself, you bunch of beautiful (and somewhat perverted) people. | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"I’ve asked for help and I get refused it so for some people it isn’t a case of not asking for help it’s the fact that even when they beg for that help they still don’t get it, I’ve given up now That's very true. It's also not easy to keep asking when you keep getting rejected when you're not thinking straight Unfortunately, this is something I have experienced. I’m very good at putting on a brave face and masking the truth. Which makes it harder for friends to understand. Personally I’ve found talking to someone outside my social circle can be more helpful and supportive than confiding in a close friend. Also, I’ve found if you don’t have a mainstream belief or faith system it can be harder for professional services and charities who are often staffed and funded by mainstream religious bodies. That’s not a dig in any way, shape or form, just a personal experience. My DM’s are always open. If you need to talk in confidence please feel free to message. Look after yourself, you bunch of beautiful (and somewhat perverted) people. " The health professionals have failed me since I was very young! It’s been down to my church who have got me into a programme I’ve been attending for months now and are sorting me out a therapist. It shouldn’t have been down to them | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Unfortunately when you are so far in that dark place, you feel like you can't talk to anyone ![]() So true ![]() ![]() | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Unfortunately when you are so far in that dark place, you feel like you can't talk to anyone ![]() I really hope you are coping better now. X | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
| |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Sorry, what happened to Bikerdrew? " search bikerdrew in forum search will tell you all you need to know its not my place to say so il just point you there | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Suffered for 13 years with mental health, had suicidal thoughts, even got everything ready to go through with it, but didn't in the end. There's help out there, I was fortunate enough to get good levels of help. Had a supportive family and some supportive friends, some completely abandoned me, but it don't hold it against them as people are ignorant to mental health issues. Two bits of advice that were given to me, one by a friends dad, who had suffered a long time ago. He told me, "don't look for the reason why you're ill, accept it, try to look forward, try to climb out of that blackness" The second, from my counsellor, she told me " know the difference between being sad, and being depressed " Both have work in good stead for me. " ![]() | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
"Sorry, what happened to Bikerdrew? search bikerdrew in forum search will tell you all you need to know its not my place to say so il just point you there" https://m.fabswingers.com/forum/lounge/1337383 | |||
Reply privately | Reply in forum | Reply +quote |
Post new Message to Thread |
back to top | ![]() |