FabSwingers.com forum: How keen is too keen….

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The world of fab is a ever changing flower :p

And I realise all

Opinions will differ… but just thoughts on messaging ….

If you’re chatting with people… but there’s a lull … how much time do people give ? Do you wait for replies? Do you check in?

‘Real life’ takes priority of course!!

Always curious

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Wait for a reply. People often use the not reply method to politely tell you to eff orf

and we wouldn't want to embarrass them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The world of fab is a ever changing flower :p

And I realise all

Opinions will differ… but just thoughts on messaging ….

If you’re chatting with people… but there’s a lull … how much time do people give ? Do you wait for replies? Do you check in?

‘Real life’ takes priority of course!!

Always curious

I think you can generally tell if someone is truly interested or just being polite.

I’ll chat for ages some time, just being polite, if the message sender is sending nice messages. If they then ask if I want to meet, that’s when I’ll tell them no and I’ll know exactly where they stand.

So maybe try to suss out the interest early?

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By *lowercandyWoman
over a year ago

Lancashire

"The world of fab is a ever changing flower :p

And I realise all

Opinions will differ… but just thoughts on messaging ….

If you’re chatting with people… but there’s a lull … how much time do people give ? Do you wait for replies? Do you check in?

‘Real life’ takes priority of course!!

Always curious

When you say check in though are you doing it within minutes, hours or you talking days

As a single female if i open my profile i try to go through messages in order so i find it annoying if i get to your reply then further up you're there again going hey, you not talking

That actually can sway my decision the other way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m an adult, if I want to talk to you, I’ll talk to you without setting a timer for in between messages.

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

If you message, and get no reply, don't send a second. If you chat, and then get no reply, don't send another, as you've said something that hasn't been taken well.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"I’m an adult, if I want to talk to you, I’ll talk to you without setting a timer for in between messages.

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d wait forever for a reply as they clearly can’t be interested if they don’t reply.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

If you think it's too quick to message, it probably is. Don't get into a routine, like corporate messaging. Give others space and chill. Remember, most people are not compatible with most other people, so there's going to be high attrition - giving others space, lets them evaluate your potential more fully.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The world of fab is a ever changing flower :p

And I realise all

Opinions will differ… but just thoughts on messaging ….

If you’re chatting with people… but there’s a lull … how much time do people give ? Do you wait for replies? Do you check in?

‘Real life’ takes priority of course!!

Always curious

I think you can generally tell if someone is truly interested or just being polite.

So maybe try to suss out the interest early? "

Yeah that’s what I thought best…. Seem keen to begin so just wait for a response if it comes

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The world of fab is a ever changing flower :p

And I realise all

Opinions will differ… but just thoughts on messaging ….

If you’re chatting with people… but there’s a lull … how much time do people give ? Do you wait for replies? Do you check in?

‘Real life’ takes priority of course!!

Always curious

When you say check in though are you doing it within minutes, hours or you talking days

As a single female if i open my profile i try to go through messages in order so i find it annoying if i get to your reply then further up you're there again going hey, you not talking

That actually can sway my decision the other way "

Haha I was talking in general for example if you’re already chatting but then it goes quiet.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m an adult, if I want to talk to you, I’ll talk to you without setting a timer for in between messages.

Ok then

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If you message, and get no reply, don't send a second. If you chat, and then get no reply, don't send another, as you've said something that hasn't been taken well.

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I’ve started chatting I’m generally interested

J x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m an adult, if I want to talk to you, I’ll talk to you without setting a timer for in between messages.

This

Noted

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’d wait forever for a reply as they clearly can’t be interested if they don’t reply.

seems likely

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If you think it's too quick to message, it probably is. Don't get into a routine, like corporate messaging. Give others space and chill. Remember, most people are not compatible with most other people, so there's going to be high attrition - giving others space, lets them evaluate your potential more fully. "

Not everyone is everyone else’s cup of tea is how I see it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I suppose people with busy mail boxes can miss a message amongst the masses.

Can't say I'd want to push a friendship though? That's not healthy for you, let alone awkward for them?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If I’ve started chatting I’m generally interested

J x "

I will bare that in mind

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If I’ve started chatting I’m generally interested

J x "

I’ve even replied privately when I shouldn’t have done

J x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If somoene hasn't even initiated conversation, they are likely getting a ton of messages - makes sense.

If they do take their time out to reply to an initial message, a "no thanks" is often appreciated.

A good few people won't do that after a few messages, mind... Shame, really.

Thing about text conversation is - Lack of context. If someone gives a one or two word answer it can mean night and day unless its heard rather than written.

Its... fun, to say the least.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

" I suppose people with busy mail boxes can miss a message amongst the masses.

Can't say I'd want to push a friendship though? That's not healthy for you, let alone awkward for them?"

That friend that turns up uninvited totally oblivious

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By *ooroo2019Woman
over a year ago

Chester

Sometimes if I’m in conversation with someone there will be a lull. Life is busy and often there will be a gap. If I notice they are online when I’m online I’ll send them a new message thread and sometimes they will send me a new message thread. I think that’s fine. If I or the other person has sent a thanks but no thanks previously that’s when I’m less inclined to re-engage.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"If I’ve started chatting I’m generally interested

J x

I’ve even replied privately when I shouldn’t have done

J x "

Oh damn so it was a mistake

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sometimes if I’m in conversation with someone there will be a lull. Life is busy and often there will be a gap. If I notice they are online when I’m online I’ll send them a new message thread and sometimes they will send me a new message thread. I think that’s fine. If I or the other person has sent a thanks but no thanks previously that’s when I’m less inclined to re-engage. "

Makes sense

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By *eyeYCouple
over a year ago

Nr Leicester

A fluid and unpredictable element

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By *onnie 90Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

People have lives, jobs, children and responsibilities. Naturally all of these come before having a chat with someone you've never met on a sex site. Anything could happen to cause a lull in chatting. Could be something as simple as a neighbour popping round for a cuppa and a chat.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A fluid and unpredictable element

Mercury?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"People have lives, jobs, children and responsibilities. Naturally all of these come before having a chat with someone you've never met on a sex site. Anything could happen to cause a lull in chatting. Could be something as simple as a neighbour popping round for a cuppa and a chat. "

Very true…. That’s how I look at it …. Real life priorities…. Just so you know I’m not talking from experience I was just curious of peoples thoughts on the subject

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on the how the conversation has been going, I’m quite chatting if it’s going well. If there aren’t or stop putting in the effort then I back off and put as much effort in to match them

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Depends on the how the conversation has been going, I’m quite chatting if it’s going well. If there aren’t or stop putting in the effort then I back off and put as much effort in to match them

Ah makes sense now :p

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"The world of fab is a ever changing flower :p

And I realise all

Opinions will differ… but just thoughts on messaging ….

If you’re chatting with people… but there’s a lull … how much time do people give ? Do you wait for replies? Do you check in?

‘Real life’ takes priority of course!!

Always curious

I'd give it a few days and check in quite casually, I'm not one to push though and anyone that gets stroppy at us when there's a lull we quickly lose interest in.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"The world of fab is a ever changing flower :p

And I realise all

Opinions will differ… but just thoughts on messaging ….

If you’re chatting with people… but there’s a lull … how much time do people give ? Do you wait for replies? Do you check in?

‘Real life’ takes priority of course!!

Always curious

I'd give it a few days and check in quite casually, I'm not one to push though and anyone that gets stroppy at us when there's a lull we quickly lose interest in.

Nobody wants a pest right? :p

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

I chat with people on here and sometimes it just tapers off, I will send a msg again though no matter how long its been since we last spoke, if they want to answer thats up to them if they don't reply I just leave it.

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Nobody wants a pest right? :p"

They say that ..but... how do they know what they are missing and how keen you are if you dont bombard them day and night with messages and raging cock pics ....right ?

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By *ull English with teaMan
over a year ago

London

I always give it 10 unanswered messages before calling it a day (no more than this), you don’t want to pester people after all…

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I chat with people on here and sometimes it just tapers off, I will send a msg again though no matter how long its been since we last spoke, if they want to answer thats up to them if they don't reply I just leave it. "

Seems like a fair way to interact

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Nobody wants a pest right? :p

They say that ..but... how do they know what they are missing and how keen you are if you dont bombard them day and night with messages and raging cock pics ....right ?

Ooo good points

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