FabSwingers.com forum: Terms of abuse

By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

In the interests of being less confrontational, I'm toying with the idea of using the classic term "Daft Apeth" when low level ridiculousness is being perpetrated, and pointing it out is unavoidable.

Are there any alternatives I should consider?

I obviously can't use "muppet" as that's extremely felt-ist, "silly sod" causes trouble with the speech impediment crowd, and "wee daftie" is far too Scots.

Appreciate your help with his important issue.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think "moron" has been cancelled by the snowflake brigade yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Twonk

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"I don't think "moron" has been cancelled by the snowflake brigade yet"

It's a bit speciifc to Piers for my tastes.

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Twonk

Viable option, although it feels like it would be best delivered in a Brummie accent.

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By *W ChapMan
over a year ago

Swindon

I prefer the tried and test - dickhead

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Berk!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't think "moron" has been cancelled by the snowflake brigade yet"
but if you do a buggs bunny and say your such a moroon that works

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sausage

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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

Silly rabbit - "Kill Bill"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwSwfWbMflY

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

"Berk!"

Or as I used to say as a kid: burp. Could never work out why the adults laughed at me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Plonker

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By *ister CMan
over a year ago

liverpool

'Who is this clown...'

Insulting in so far as you're calling them a clown... but also suggesting they are not even one of the better known clowns...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Plonker

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By *oo..Woman
over a year ago

Boo's World

Dipshit

Cockwomble

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Silly rabbit - "Kill Bill"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rwSwfWbMflY"
trix are for kids

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In the interests of being less confrontational, I'm toying with the idea of using the classic term "Daft Apeth" when low level ridiculousness is being perpetrated, and pointing it out is unavoidable.

Are there any alternatives I should consider?

I obviously can't use "muppet" as that's extremely felt-ist, "silly sod" causes trouble with the speech impediment crowd, and "wee daftie" is far too Scots.

Appreciate your help with his important issue."

Im from scotland and have never used the term wee dafty lol haha ya fuckin dafty has came out my mouth though lol

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By *esparate danMan
over a year ago

glasgow

Puddin

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wally Brain

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't think "moron" has been cancelled by the snowflake brigade yet

It's a bit speciifc to Piers for my tastes."

Yes he does say this a lot.

How about my personal favourite - "tossa"

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

I was sat on the back of the bus a few days back, and among the graffiti, one young man had been described as a fat handed mango. I quite like it

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By *ack688Man
over a year ago

abruzzo Italy (and UK)

Pillock!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Donkeybollocks

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By *uietly_KinkyMan
over a year ago

High Wycombe

Thundering lackwit

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By *uietly_KinkyMan
over a year ago

High Wycombe

"I was sat on the back of the bus a few days back, and among the graffiti, one young man had been described as a fat handed mango. I quite like it

Could have been a compliment from a girl who liked fisting.

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

Thank you all, my heart is lifted by your contributions.

However, all terms including actual swearing have been discountedy, along with the anatomical references.

"Wally" has been added to the list, pending confirmation of the scarcity of gentlemen christened "Walter".

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Eejit, half wit, clown!

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Berk!"

This has been passed for future use, thank you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What a prat!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Gobshite works for me everytime

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Silly Billy.

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By *lderflower_AppleWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke

Cockwomble?

Or would that offend both people with penises and wombles?

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Gobshite works for me everytime "

Your domestic employment practices have no place here...

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

At work I tend to ask who put 50p in the idiot machine...can't get into trouble for calling people names if you're asking a general question and not directing it at anyone in particular

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By *valon7Woman
over a year ago

Lancaster

I just say 'gormless beggar' or 'daft Benny'.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wazzock

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By *heNerdyFembyWoman
over a year ago

Eastbourne (she/they)

"Berk!"

Don’t you open that trap door!

You are a fool if you dare!

Stay away from that trap door!

‘Cos there’s something down there!

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"At work I tend to ask who put 50p in the idiot machine...can't get into trouble for calling people names if you're asking a general question and not directing it at anyone in particular

Inflation is clearly biting hard if 50p is needed to acquire an idiot.

But you should be grateful - they roam free in some workplaces.

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By *atcherwankerMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Silly sausage" is always a winner. It has the rare benefit of being capable of being both light hearted and inoffensive, and cutting and demeaning. Often simultaneously.

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By *uliette500Woman
over a year ago

Hull

"Wazzock "

Not head anyone use that for years.

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Numpty

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Wifeys favourite word is "cockwomble,"

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By *skyouneverknowMan
over a year ago

Calne

I'm reading a book translated from Czech - the translator apologises in the introduction that English doesn't have enough terms of abuse or insults to provide a meaningful translation of parts of the original

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By *ady CurvaceousWoman
over a year ago

Kent

Twunt.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Drongo?

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

You doughnut works for me

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

Arse wipe! X

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

"Twunt. "

Ohh yes I see lots those in cars on my bycicle home from work! X

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By *hilledGuyClactonMan
over a year ago

Little clacton

Plonker needs to come back

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Plonker - good enough for Del Boy then surely good enough for A sharp dressed man.

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By *illanelleWoman
over a year ago

Ryde, Isle of Wight

Definitely poltroon

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

I think the rather humble nobhead works well.

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By *assycitygirlWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

"Numpty"

Damn you got there first. I was reading all the comments to check if it had been done.

So I'll go with my other favourite "ass hat"

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Plonker - good enough for Del Boy then surely good enough for A sharp dressed man."

How dare you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/08/22 16:05:32]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ya big nini

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Knobber.

As in “that was my parking space ya big knobber!”

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By *ilverjagMan
over a year ago

swansea

"Uncircumcised" can be used as an alternative to describe "A complete dick"

"A Sexual intellectual" serves as an alternative to "Clever fucker"

Whilst, "An attractive anus" may be seen as a politically correct way to describe, "A Smart arse."

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

[Removed by poster at 01/08/22 16:17:33]

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

""Uncircumcised" can be used as an alternative to describe "A complete dick"

"A Sexual intellectual" serves as an alternative to "Clever fucker"

Whilst, "An attractive anus" may be seen as a politically correct way to describe, "A Smart arse.""

Job interview advice for us all there....

"Why did you leave your last role?"

- Well, it turned out my manager was uncircumcised"

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Knobber.

As in “that was my parking space ya big knobber!”"

That seeme more Bristolian than Welsh, to be honest. Not sure I could carry it off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Clown.

Tube.

Spoon.

....for full effect you still need an expletive though.

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

"I don't think "moron" has been cancelled by the snowflake brigade yet"

Snowflake brigade?

Moron originally referred to someone with learning difficulties.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

"Knobber.

As in “that was my parking space ya big knobber!”

That seeme more Bristolian than Welsh, to be honest. Not sure I could carry it off."

Bristolian? How very dare you!

How about Twp. That’s an insult and nobody would know. Unless they were a Welsh.

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Bristolian? How very dare you!

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"How about Twp.

Sounds too much like schtupp, a slightly more pleasant term...

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By *ndisMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

Calling someone a 'tool' works for me!

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By *B69Woman
over a year ago

Wiltshire

I’ve heard chump used a lot recently

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

Ah yes, nobody has suggested "spanner" either, have they?

What a wrench...

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By *ixiePoisonWoman
over a year ago

Darlington

Divvy, Numpty, Fuckwit, Dipstick

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By *ixiePoisonWoman
over a year ago

Darlington

Ding

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By *heeky wiggles2020Man
over a year ago

near the seaside

Just go in hard

And call them a C bomb for absolutely everything

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By *isCockHerTailCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

Is actually pretty offensive if you know your cockney rhyming slang

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By *isCockHerTailCouple
over a year ago

Fareham

I generally favour bellend, but that might be a bit strong.

Wally, wazzack, assclown and a very regional insult, specific to our little part of England - dinlo

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Is actually pretty offensive if you know your cockney rhyming slang "

What is??

#terrified

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By *romagefraisWoman
over a year ago

Sunderland

Stupid cunt. I prefer the direct, offensive approach.

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By *ilverjagMan
over a year ago

swansea

""Uncircumcised" can be used as an alternative to describe "A complete dick"

"A Sexual intellectual" serves as an alternative to "Clever fucker"

Whilst, "An attractive anus" may be seen as a politically correct way to describe, "A Smart arse."

Job interview advice for us all there....

"Why did you leave your last role?"

- Well, it turned out my manager was uncircumcised""

And you followed up by suggesting that your manager gets himself an agent, that way he wouldn't need to keep handling himself all the time.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Asshat

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

Tit

(Obviously of the blue/coal/great crested varieties)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nincompoop. Too old fashioned?

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By *harpDressed Man OP Man
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"Nincompoop. Too old fashioned?

Definitely not, squire

A trifle long, though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find wazzock to be charmingly effective

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By *al kalMan
over a year ago

london

Pleb or “Plebeian”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Eejit, half wit, clown!"

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By *ny1localMan
over a year ago

READING

After the last few weeks,a 'Boris' should fit the bill.

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