FabSwingers.com forum: After a break.....

By *bi Haive OP Man
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Do you find it tricky to get back into the swing of things (pun intended) ?

We've been on a sizeable sabbatical from Fab & swinging life due to all manner of reasons.

We went to our old club haunt last night for the first time in years and whilst we had a great time, it felt awesome to actually be back out there and we throughly enjoyed the night......it felt kind of odd. Almost like it did our first time clubbing together.

Yes, apart from a few of the long standing staff we didn't know any of the other attendees and that obviously makes a big difference to going somewhere where you already know people. The bricks and mortar were almost identical to our last visit. The atmosphere was as good. There was just as much activity going on as on previous visits.

It just felt different. Not 'bad different', just different.

I guess it's to be expected of course, but if you've taken a break from something (swinging related or anything else in vanilla life) for any length of time do you find it tricky or awkward when you return or is it like you've never been away or stopped doing it in the first place?

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By *den-Valley-coupleCouple
over a year ago

Cumbria

Yes it's incredibly hard to get back out there we possibly only when to 10 parties a year playing at around half so after covid we were going to just stop but met a great couple and they blow our minds and had some great sex so still here...

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

Yes. I’ve been in a similar situation to yourselves and only recently got back into clubs again.

I hadn’t realised how much I relied on knowing people and having friends on the scene to feel comfortable, until they weren’t there. It feels like a different world

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By *bi Haive OP Man
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Yes. I’ve been in a similar situation to yourselves and only recently got back into clubs again.

I hadn’t realised how much I relied on knowing people and having friends on the scene to feel comfortable, until they weren’t there. It feels like a different world "

Yep.

When you're used to walking into a room and instantly recognising people it's weird entering the same place that you've been in so many times before and not knowing a soul.

I guess it's like moving home, revisiting your old local pub years later and finding that apart from the barman that's been there 20 years all the regular punters have gone.

Or getting divorced and trying to get back into the dating scene.

Or starting a new job where there's a huge team and you know no-one.

Even if you're generally a social butterfly, confident and outgoing and of course have your OH with you for company - I have to say it was a surreal experience.

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

"Yes. I’ve been in a similar situation to yourselves and only recently got back into clubs again.

I hadn’t realised how much I relied on knowing people and having friends on the scene to feel comfortable, until they weren’t there. It feels like a different world

Yep.

When you're used to walking into a room and instantly recognising people it's weird entering the same place that you've been in so many times before and not knowing a soul.

I guess it's like moving home, revisiting your old local pub years later and finding that apart from the barman that's been there 20 years all the regular punters have gone.

Or getting divorced and trying to get back into the dating scene.

Or starting a new job where there's a huge team and you know no-one.

Even if you're generally a social butterfly, confident and outgoing and of course have your OH with you for company - I have to say it was a surreal experience.

Absolutely this... only more so because I'm already shy to start with.

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

... and I don't kid myself anyone might remember me either way.

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By *bi Haive OP Man
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"... and I don't kid myself anyone might remember me either way."

You'd be surprised who people remember, even after a long hiatus. Took me a while to work out who was still around on the forums and who wasn't, especially with what appears to be a growing trend of people leaving and coming back two weeks later under a new nom de plume. I've never worked out why people don't just hide profiles anymore? Seems a major ball ache to delete and start again but hey - people are strange.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Situational (I know you know that Obi).

I've not been to a club in a few years and I'm certain I'll find it a bit weird. Maybe not weird. Different. I think in part that's because I've changed and grown and have a different mentality/outlook/dynamic now then before.

But some things are far easier, like muscle memory almost. You can sink into them without any resistance.

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