FabSwingers.com forum: Cheats never prosper

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I'm seeing more and more posts from people openly cheating.

I'm intrigued - is it really worth the hassle or would you be better off just going it alone?

It sounds like a lot of hard work and stress maintaining a double life.

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Never judge a man until you’ve walked in his shoes

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

"Never judge a man until you’ve walked in his shoes "

Never judge a man unless you’re at least a QC appointed by the Bar to the Privy Counsel.

I’m sure my knowledge of the judiciary can be challenged, it was just a lame joke.

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

I'm all for these threads! That way I can stalk my way through them and block 'em all

LvM

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By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I think the ones who don't mention it and quietly go about their business probably do okay

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Never judge a man until you’ve walked in his shoes "

Or woman

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Also no judgement, just a point of intrigue.

Each to their own and all that

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

"I'm all for these threads! That way I can stalk my way through them and block 'em all

LvM"

Yep you already got me lol

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

"I think the ones who don't mention it and quietly go about their business probably do okay "

I let folk know to be open with them it’s not fair on them really

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm all for these threads! That way I can stalk my way through them and block 'em all

LvM"

Same!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm all for these threads! That way I can stalk my way through them and block 'em all

LvM"

Same. My block list is predominantly cheats

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

"Never judge a man until you’ve walked in his shoes

Or woman"

You’re learning

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

"I'm all for these threads! That way I can stalk my way through them and block 'em all

LvM

Same! "

You missed me

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

I'm intrigued - is it really worth the hassle or would you be better off just going it alone?"

Different people will be in different situations - mortgages, kids, their perception of the relationship, etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm all for these threads! That way I can stalk my way through them and block 'em all

LvM

Same!

You missed me"

Lol! I tend to just block the ones I could accidentally meet.

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By *andy_tomMan
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Cheats meet Cheats. Problem solved don't judge till you have walked in there shoes.

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By *ausage1970Man
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

I've met women who don't want their partners too know. I don't judge as I have no idea what is the reason. And yes shock horror women who are in a gay relationship cheat too with men and that's from 1st hand experience.

Bottom line if your reason for playing away from home is that you love your partner but there's no sexual relationship so you do like being with them and happy in all other aspects of life which to be honest what % of a relationship is sex. There's alot more to it then sex so say 10% is sexual and the 90% is being together. Maybe we should think that meeting for sex only is not so bad. Personally the issues I see is when the sex becomes more emotional then for me that's definitely cheating because its left the boundaries of just sex. Anyway I'm off to get popcorn as I'm about to get someone react to my ramblings

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally don't cheat, never have and never will. But does that mean I'll beat someone with a moral stick who does? No. We are all adults who make our own choices in life and we never know what's going on in someone's relationship. To judge cheating as a whole is naive and unrealistic.

Anyone who open declares they are on here are asking to be judged. They can't moan about being bit when they've thrown theirselves to the wolves.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s certainly a controversial subject, relationships are hard surely open honest discussions are a way to understanding.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm all for these threads! That way I can stalk my way through them and block 'em all

LvM"

Same!

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

How do you know they never prosper? I’m sure you only hear about the ones who’ve been caught out. I always think that when I see that saying. Not true at all really.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"How do you know they never prosper? I’m sure you only hear about the ones who’ve been caught out. I always think that when I see that saying. Not true at all really. "

It's just a title. More of a grab to start conversation

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Ok, so I didn’t actually throw a double six - rather I ‘arranged’ the dice when the person was briefly out the room.

….It got me far though (doubly so when I ascended the ladder in fact!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I personally don't cheat, never have and never will. But does that mean I'll beat someone with a moral stick who does? No. We are all adults who make our own choices in life and we never know what's going on in someone's relationship. To judge cheating as a whole is naive and unrealistic.

Anyone who open declares they are on here are asking to be judged. They can't moan about being bit when they've thrown theirselves to the wolves. "

I agree with this. It’s rarely as simple as it seems.

I’m not condoning cheating, but are we all whiter than white?

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By *aomilatteCouple
over a year ago

Midlands

"I'm seeing more and more posts from people openly cheating.

I'm intrigued - is it really worth the hassle or would you be better off just going it alone?

It sounds like a lot of hard work and stress maintaining a double life."

All is not always as it seems. The real cheaters tend to keep quiet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you know they never prosper? I’m sure you only hear about the ones who’ve been caught out. I always think that when I see that saying. Not true at all really. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People keep their swinging life secret. Sex can be secret.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've met women who don't want their partners too know. I don't judge as I have no idea what is the reason. And yes shock horror women who are in a gay relationship cheat too with men and that's from 1st hand experience.

I actually agree with you. Relationships are complicated so I don’t judge. However, I wouldn’t knowingly meet a married man simply because I wouldn’t want to get involved / have wife knocking on my door as she’s found out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never judge a man until you’ve smashed his wife behind his back "

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

It must be worth or they wouldn't do it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Make good choices people and don't tell me if you have hubby at home, especially if it's a club night

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By *abasaurus RexMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

"I'm seeing more and more posts from people openly cheating.

I'm intrigued - is it really worth the hassle or would you be better off just going it alone?

It sounds like a lot of hard work and stress maintaining a double life."

People’s reasons are their own. It’s entirely possible to deeply love someone and yet have a woefully unfulfilling sex life that hasn’t improved despite great efforts being made.

There are many circumstances that might lead people to feel it’s the best choice for them and I don’t think they need to justify or explain it, even if it’s not what you or I might do.

Live and let live.

Ps, not saying you’re not — just expressing my perspective.

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By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

"I think the ones who don't mention it and quietly go about their business probably do okay

I let folk know to be open with them it’s not fair on them really"

Also not fair on their partners that they are cheating on....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a problem with our culture. I think monogamy for our species, is probably relatively new. In the entire timeline of our species existence anyway.

Realistically, we shouldn't be so hung up on sex but we are, and we're conditioned this way from birth.

We're a strange bunch, like, we don't mind our partners going to work everyday spending the majority of their lives with other people who they become extremely attached to build connections that last a life time. But we lose our minds if the same person spends 20 minutes with somebody they might never meet again?

We're so weird.

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By *weetiepie99Woman
over a year ago

cardiff

"I think the ones who don't mention it and quietly go about their business probably do okay

I let folk know to be open with them it’s not fair on them really

Also not fair on their partners that they are cheating on...."

Took the words right out of my mouth..

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"It's a problem with our culture. I think monogamy for our species, is probably relatively new. In the entire timeline of our species existence anyway.

Realistically, we shouldn't be so hung up on sex but we are, and we're conditioned this way from birth.

We're so weird. "

I don't think it's strange to be upset if you enter a relationship under certain terms ie the assumption that it will be monogamous then discover that your partner has decided to change those terms without running it past you.

The default is monogamy if one partner either never intends to be monogamous or changes their mind they should say so. In my opinion.

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By *ausage1970Man
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

I had an awkward meeting once at a ladies house she told me it was safe to come around and she had a couples profile unfortunately her husband was unaware of the profile and came home early!! She made me pose as a carpet salesperson measuring up the lounge carpet!

to say we never met again goes without saying

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm seeing more and more posts from people openly cheating.

simply put cheating is not swinging

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

to say we never met again goes without saying

Blimey ! What did you use as a ruler?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh yeah of course, I'm not saying cheat is okay, that isn't my point. More, why do we even enter these agreements? Who does it actually benefit?

"The default is monogamy if one partner either never intends to be monogamous or changes their mind they should say so. In my opinion."

I agree, if you don't want to be monogamous just out of respect for the person you love, you should say.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

Live and let live:

Personally I would rather leave a relationship than cheat on someone I was supposed to love/be in love with.

All fun and games until the cheated on partner finds out and you leave them absolutely devastated.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Oh yeah of course, I'm not saying cheat is okay, that isn't my point. More, why do we even enter these agreements? Who does it actually benefit?

The default is monogamy if one partner either never intends to be monogamous or changes their mind they should say so. In my opinion.

I agree, if you don't want to be monogamous just out of respect for the person you love, you should say. "

Some people actually want and prefer monogamy it benefits them. I'm sure you know theory around the origins of monogamous relationships and the perceived benefits.

I really wish we lived in a world where people discussed the kind of relationship they wanted before they got too far down the line and continued to discuss without fear throughout

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Live and let live:

Personally I would rather leave a relationship than cheat on someone I was supposed to love/be in love with.

All fun and games until the cheated on partner finds out and you leave them absolutely devastated.

Or ruin a family with kids just for sex?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

to say we never met again goes without saying

Oh dear and yes this is what I’d want to avoid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I really wish we lived in a world where people discussed the kind of relationship they wanted before they got too far down the line and continued to discuss without fear throughout "

Me to, a lot. I think there are a lot of unhappy people because they don't feel they can be open with who they are and what they want.

I'm not saying monogamy is wrong or forced, there are 100% people who are happy and want that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Live and let live:

Personally I would rather leave a relationship than cheat on someone I was supposed to love/be in love with.

All fun and games until the cheated on partner finds out and you leave them absolutely devastated.

100%

Lying to somebody who has given you their trust, their heart, is unforgivable.

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By *entBarryUKMan
over a year ago

Ashford

I would find cheating so stressful, luckily my wife and I have a very flirty, open relationship. We are always pointing out people we fancy. It makes life more fun and relaxed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know the background of a few people who cheat. It's rarely as black and white as it's made out to be, so I don't judge but also don't sleep with them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I would find cheating so stressful, luckily my wife and I have a very flirty, open relationship. We are always pointing out people we fancy. It makes life more fun and relaxed."

We do the same - we enjoy the honesty and we also rib each other sometimes on each other choices

all part of the fun

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Ooooooo yes they do

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never judge a man until you’ve walked in his shoes

Or woman"

Often walk in women's shoes...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Never judge a man until you’ve walked in his shoes

Or woman

Often walk in women's shoes..."

Not as easy as it looks I hear

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

"I'm all for these threads! That way I can stalk my way through them and block 'em all

LvM

Same!

You missed me

Lol! I tend to just block the ones I could accidentally meet."

So what about a unaccidental meet then? An arranged one ( worth a try)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a problem with our culture. I think monogamy for our species, is probably relatively new. In the entire timeline of our species existence anyway.

Realistically, we shouldn't be so hung up on sex but we are, and we're conditioned this way from birth.

We're so weird. "

Working with people is the same as fucking strangers?

Every day's a school day.

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By *atcherwankerMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Our most recent prime minister is fairly positive proof that cheats do, in fact, prosper.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Our most recent prime minister is fairly positive proof that cheats do, in fact, prosper."

The one who just got forced to resign?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Our most recent prime minister is fairly positive proof that cheats do, in fact, prosper.

The one who just got forced to resign? "

Not because he's a cheater. MPs didn't give a toss about that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never judge a man until you’ve walked in his shoes "

Well said that man

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By *atcherwankerMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"Our most recent prime minister is fairly positive proof that cheats do, in fact, prosper.

The one who just got forced to resign? "

With a bright future of "consultancy" and sizeable salaries for sitting on boards alongside his continuing career as an MP, as well as counting all the shiny pound coins pouring into his pockets from manipulating economic policy to keep his personal wealth increasing and the side benefits of awarding peerages to Russian agents, a hefty Prime Minister's pension and a severance package large enough to buy a decent sized home that he can just blow on and prostitutes and whichever younger woman he's going to abandon his latest wife and children for?

Yes, that one.

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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

"I'm all for these threads! That way I can stalk my way through them and block 'em all

LvM"

Great, Will you block me please?

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By *asycouple1971Couple
over a year ago

midlands

We have met married men and women that are cheating.

None of our business if they want to cheat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a problem with our culture. I think monogamy for our species, is probably relatively new. In the entire timeline of our species existence anyway.

Realistically, we shouldn't be so hung up on sex but we are, and we're conditioned this way from birth.

We're so weird. "

Tell us you're high without telling us you're high

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"It's a problem with our culture. I think monogamy for our species, is probably relatively new. In the entire timeline of our species existence anyway.

Realistically, we shouldn't be so hung up on sex but we are, and we're conditioned this way from birth.

We're so weird.

Tell us you're high without telling us you're high"

I think this is illustrating that people are happy for their partner to have emotional connection with other people but not sexual. Infidelity for a lot of people is purely physical.

Personally I'd be just as hurt, if not more by a romantic affair

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone is willing to lie to their partner, they are not trustworthy.

I love it when the trash takes itself out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"It's a problem with our culture. I think monogamy for our species, is probably relatively new. In the entire timeline of our species existence anyway.

Realistically, we shouldn't be so hung up on sex but we are, and we're conditioned this way from birth.

We're so weird.

Tell us you're high without telling us you're high

I think this is illustrating that people are happy for their partner to have emotional connection with other people but not sexual. Infidelity for a lot of people is purely physical.

Personally I'd be just as hurt, if not more by a romantic affair "

You'd be more hurt if your partner made a friend at work than if they had sex with someone else?

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By *obandruthCouple
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Wow don't you just love the forum police. Its nothing to do with you what other people do .they have there reasons to be here. Get on with your own life .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Although cheating isn't something I would do, nor would I knowingly meet someone who is cheating, there are plenty of other stuff I do do that is morally wrong, that others could judge me for. So I don't judge.

However I disagree that cheaters don't prosper. Many do.

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By *aiseiMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"People keep their swinging life secret. Sex can be secret.

I’m pretty sure the other person has to be aware, it’s kind of a legal thing….

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

At the end of the day it's up to each and everyone of us if we would cheat or not! I personally wouldn't! Nor would I meet someone who is cheating! I get that it's their choice but won't help them do it! Have had many a atattched man on here say why not meet it's me that's cheating not u! They really don't get that by involving others has an affect on them as well! I wouldn't want to shit on another woman! Had it done to me not nice! X

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By *obandruthCouple
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Ops . Apparently cheating on your vows doesn't count. According to the forum police otherwise they wouldn't be on here. They do like to judge but not be judged. I find this very strange.

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By *i_guy_sloughMan
over a year ago

Langley

My wife and I are Ethically Non Monogamous and don’t knowingly assist others to cheat. We try not to judge those who do we just don’t agree with it so we actively avoid anyone whose other half is not aware and in agreement.

The ones who openly advertise that they are cheating are the ones more likely to be caught doing so, it seems to be a risk that they want to take so they only have themselves to blame when things go pear shaped.

Those of us who don’t agree with cheating are not going to change their minds, they are going to go ahead and do it anyway so all we can realistically do is block them and not meet them. There are those however who have no problem with meeting people who are cheating so there is a market for them out there.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Ops . Apparently cheating on your vows doesn't count. According to the forum police otherwise they wouldn't be on here. They do like to judge but not be judged. I find this very strange.

What vows am I cheating on ?

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By *obandruthCouple
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Your marriage vows if your married. But I'm not judging. I leave all that to the forum police. What other people do is up to them and not anyone else if you don't want to meet them don't but don't make a song and dance about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely we should not judge others and encourage them to be honest. That way it enables people to make an informed choice about whether to meet or not. We can all have an opinion but at the end of the day it is up to people to decide what is right for them.

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By *ubwife4uCouple
over a year ago

Kent

"Never judge a man until you’ve walked in his shoes

Or woman"

What is it about women Stan?

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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago

Redhill

"Wow don't you just love the forum police. Its nothing to do with you what other people do .they have there reasons to be here. Get on with your own life .

And here I was, wondering why my life is so sh*t and I don’t prosper… of course, it’s because of the forum’s moral police curse! **NOT** LOL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tell us you're high without telling us you're high"

Weird goto, not "high" btw...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

none of my buisness what others do i just look after me and hubs and family as someone has already said your not in there shoes so you really cant judge ...

also no one likes a white knight / cock blocker people really do need to take care of themselves and not worry about how others behave .... well unless they have a axe in hand maybe ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never judge a man until you’ve walked in his shoes "

Well said .. or a woman

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How dair a married person be a swinger ffs

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By *lex46TV/TS
over a year ago

Near Wells

I never ask anyone about their marital status, none of my business.

Unless someone tells you they have a partner, how do you know they are cheating?

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

"I never ask anyone about their marital status, none of my business.

Unless someone tells you they have a partner, how do you know they are cheating?"

I would ask any potential meet and hope they would b honest? X

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

"I never ask anyone about their marital status, none of my business.

Unless someone tells you they have a partner, how do you know they are cheating?"

I always ask and there are often some clues if someone is attached .

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"I never ask anyone about their marital status, none of my business.

Unless someone tells you they have a partner, how do you know they are cheating?

I always ask and there are often some clues if someone is attached ."

One guy we met for coffee jumped every time the door opened lol. Poor chap he kept one eye on his phone and the other on the door he was a nervous wreck by the time we'd finished

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hold the front page - swingers cheat ?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Hold the front page - swingers cheat ?

I know! Incredible to think isn't it ????????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hold the front page - swingers cheat ?

I know! Incredible to think isn't it ????????"

Absolutely !!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I never ask anyone about their marital status, none of my business.

Unless someone tells you they have a partner, how do you know they are cheating?

I always ask and there are often some clues if someone is attached ."

Care to elaborate?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I never ask anyone about their marital status, none of my business.

Unless someone tells you they have a partner, how do you know they are cheating?

I always ask and there are often some clues if someone is attached .

Care to elaborate?"

What time of day and what days they're "available". Only late at night is often a sign they're attached. Don't talk at weekends - same.

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

"I never ask anyone about their marital status, none of my business.

Unless someone tells you they have a partner, how do you know they are cheating?

I always ask and there are often some clues if someone is attached .

Care to elaborate?

What time of day and what days they're "available". Only late at night is often a sign they're attached. Don't talk at weekends - same. "

Yep mainly daytime meets in week

Only communicate at certain times ,often no public pics or something like a hand or eye .

Mention being discreet

Just my experience so not saying it's all ,that's why I said often.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I never ask anyone about their marital status, none of my business.

Unless someone tells you they have a partner, how do you know they are cheating?

I always ask and there are often some clues if someone is attached .

Care to elaborate?

What time of day and what days they're "available". Only late at night is often a sign they're attached. Don't talk at weekends - same.

Yep mainly daytime meets in week

Only communicate at certain times ,often no public pics or something like a hand or eye .

Mention being discreet

Just my experience so not saying it's all ,that's why I said often."

Cannot accommodate is a ted flag too. Obviously not every guy who cannot accommodate is a cheat but it’s a red flag when combined with other things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

you have to be a very very good lier to fool people anyway .... either way its not any bother to me as said above ..but its so easy to spot most either whem messaging or on a first meet ...the married guy just stands out for some reason

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"you have to be a very very good lier to fool people anyway .... either way its not any bother to me as said above ..but its so easy to spot most either whem messaging or on a first meet ...the married guy just stands out for some reason"

opps ....or woman

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and heres the other thing if worked out by % the ratio of cheating will be 50/50 man or woman its only more noticeable on here because men vastly out number the women....

also couples the amount of male halfs of couples on here we get messages from asking to meet without the other half knowing is shockinly high .... so you may think your fine but many of you are most certinly not .... just saying ...its not alway as things seem ...

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By *andC1000Couple
over a year ago

Ashford

"I think the ones who don't mention it and quietly go about their business probably do okay

I let folk know to be open with them it’s not fair on them really

Also not fair on their partners that they are cheating on...."

Exactly this, not just emotional hurt but the possible health risks that come with it too

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By *il sub princessWoman
over a year ago

West Midlands

I'd it's not your business keep out of it. Simple

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