FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to The Lounge

Don't

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Ever make the mistake of placing your deodorant next to other cans when staying away at relatives!!

Just had to have my second shower in 10 minutes after coating my pits in "extra firm hold" hairspray!!!

The underarm mohecian look is just not me!

*this infomercial has been brought to you by new 'Crack Check' from ObiTech!

"Always wondering if your undercarriage is free from clutter - stray hairs, shreds of cheap loo rolls, dangleberries, tag nuts and winnets? Finding it tricky to check regularly without hopping on the sink and craning your neck to see the reflection of your bum canyon in the mirror?

Then new 'Crack Check' could be the answer to all your fresh ring worries!! Simply peel the underside of the 'Crack Check' mirrored strip away and attach to the inside of your chosen undergarments - then whenever you feel the need to inspect the cleanliness of your tradesmans entrance - just drop your drawers and look down! Simples!!

No more freshness worries and oh so convenient! Order yours today!!!

(Non-reusable, non-biodegradable, do not attempt to flush after use. Any resemblance to cheaply sold mirrored screen mobile phone protectors is purely coincidental! No refunds, especially if used!!)

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

get on Dragons Den

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was camping a couple of years ago.

In my bathroom bag I had a small blue tube of toothpaste, and a similarly-sized small blue tube of Savlon....

Spit - splutter - euch!!!!!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *upitersmileCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

Although its a very unique idea, I fear there would be a problem with it not getting wrinkled in men's underwear as it would be impossible to incorporate 'wings'. Without being able to keep the mirrored side smooth it wouldnt be able to serve its purpose. And for that reason 'I'm out'

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Although its a very unique idea, I fear there would be a problem with it not getting wrinkled in men's underwear as it would be impossible to incorporate 'wings'. Without being able to keep the mirrored side smooth it wouldnt be able to serve its purpose. And for that reason 'I'm out' "

Not 'In' for the female only line?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *upitersmileCouple
over a year ago

Manchester


"Although its a very unique idea, I fear there would be a problem with it not getting wrinkled in men's underwear as it would be impossible to incorporate 'wings'. Without being able to keep the mirrored side smooth it wouldnt be able to serve its purpose. And for that reason 'I'm out'

Not 'In' for the female only line? "

I have a pretty little compact the this purpose. Why else did you think we carry around these dinky little mirrors?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Although its a very unique idea, I fear there would be a problem with it not getting wrinkled in men's underwear as it would be impossible to incorporate 'wings'. Without being able to keep the mirrored side smooth it wouldnt be able to serve its purpose. And for that reason 'I'm out'

Not 'In' for the female only line?

I have a pretty little compact the this purpose. Why else did you think we carry around these dinky little mirrors? "

You women are just to clever for us guys!

And that might explain why I ended up with blusher on my nose the other day!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *upitersmileCouple
over a year ago

Manchester


"Although its a very unique idea, I fear there would be a problem with it not getting wrinkled in men's underwear as it would be impossible to incorporate 'wings'. Without being able to keep the mirrored side smooth it wouldnt be able to serve its purpose. And for that reason 'I'm out'

Not 'In' for the female only line?

I have a pretty little compact the this purpose. Why else did you think we carry around these dinky little mirrors?

You women are just to clever for us guys!

And that might explain why I ended up with blusher on my nose the other day!! "

Lipstick works much better for the Rudolf look

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

I spray hair spray on my face after I have done my make up on an evening out to keep the make up in place and to last the evening...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I spray hair spray on my face after I have done my make up on an evening out to keep the make up in place and to last the evening... "

Might try that for wrinkles - cheaper than Botox! And I am an old man apparently...!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *upitersmileCouple
over a year ago

Manchester

Does that actually work? I've heard a lot of people say that.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Does that actually work? I've heard a lot of people say that. "

Suppose it's one way of getting a sticky face!!

*runs from cheeky!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"Does that actually work? I've heard a lot of people say that. "

Yes it does work...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Does that actually work? I've heard a lot of people say that.

Yes it does work... "

Don't you just smell of hairspray all night?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham


"Does that actually work? I've heard a lot of people say that.

Yes it does work...

Don't you just smell of hairspray all night? "

Eeu d'silvikrin

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"Does that actually work? I've heard a lot of people say that.

Yes it does work...

Don't you just smell of hairspray all night? "

No I don't

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Does that actually work? I've heard a lot of people say that.

Yes it does work...

Don't you just smell of hairspray all night?

No I don't "

Fair enough, I just assumed there would be a lingering smell.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How about being on Holiday with the In-laws and watching your father in law pick up a tube of Canesten, squeeze it out and brush his teeth with it.........

100% true and still one of the funniest things I have ever seen

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *nfieldishCouple
over a year ago

Enfield


"How about being on Holiday with the In-laws and watching your father in law pick up a tube of Canesten, squeeze it out and brush his teeth with it.........

100% true and still one of the funniest things I have ever seen "

Like..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon


"Does that actually work? I've heard a lot of people say that.

Yes it does work...

Don't you just smell of hairspray all night?

No I don't

Fair enough, I just assumed there would be a lingering smell. "

No its a very fine mist I put on...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OBI, you use hairspray? You big woofta!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"OBI, you use hairspray? You big woofta! "

I have to - to keep my 'long flowing locks' out of my eyes!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham


"OBI, you use hairspray? You big woofta! "

Haha good new name

I heard it was for your make up obi????

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"OBI, you use hairspray? You big woofta!

Haha good new name

I heard it was for your make up obi????"

Shhhhh - it's meant to be a secret!

It's not easy being 73 and pulling off 36!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield


"OBI, you use hairspray? You big woofta!

Haha good new name

I heard it was for your make up obi????

Shhhhh - it's meant to be a secret!

It's not easy being 73 and pulling off 36!! "

Good on yer for finding a 36yr old who has such a wide age range!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"OBI, you use hairspray? You big woofta!

Haha good new name

I heard it was for your make up obi????

Shhhhh - it's meant to be a secret!

It's not easy being 73 and pulling off 36!!

Good on yer for finding a 36yr old who has such a wide age range! "

Cheeky!!!

Now bend over for your punishment!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I spray hair spray on my face after I have done my make up on an evening out to keep the make up in place and to last the evening... "

thats what powder is for, and much nicer to the skin..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Obi, just an idea for the ladies version of Crack Check, would it be possible to have the mirror so it makes their bums look smaller at the same time?

The advertising writes itself:

Guys, fed up with the dreaded question "does my bum look big to you?". Then buy her Crack Check! The all in one rectal hygiene and mass indicator. One size fits all, thongs right up to granny pants. But don't take our word for it- Colin 23 from Newcastle....I was fed up with wor lass belting us round the heed like, so I nicked a pack of Crack Check and now its fuckin mint. She can see her urn fat arse! Thanks Crack Check!

I want a bit of any action you get from this now though Obi or I'll check your crack with my heel.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

LOL!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have picked up deep heat before with out looking that was not plesent lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *histler21Man
over a year ago

Ipswich


"Ever make the mistake of placing your deodorant next to other cans when staying away at relatives!!

Just had to have my second shower in 10 minutes after coating my pits in "extra firm hold" hairspray!!!

"

Does it hold longer than Viagra?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Obi, just an idea for the ladies version of Crack Check, would it be possible to have the mirror so it makes their bums look smaller at the same time?

The advertising writes itself:

Guys, fed up with the dreaded question "does my bum look big to you?". Then buy her Crack Check! The all in one rectal hygiene and mass indicator. One size fits all, thongs right up to granny pants. But don't take our word for it- Colin 23 from Newcastle....I was fed up with wor lass belting us round the heed like, so I nicked a pack of Crack Check and now its fuckin mint. She can see her urn fat arse! Thanks Crack Check!

I want a bit of any action you get from this now though Obi or I'll check your crack with my heel. "

Genius! You're in for 20% of the profits!!

(I'm a tight arse! Lol )

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm happy with 20% of sweet FA!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm happy with 20% of sweet FA!

"

Cynic!!!!

Make it 10% then!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top