FabSwingers.com forum: How often do women message first ?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

How often do women message first on here I guess it does happen but not as regular as I thought it would as a women what stops you from messaging someone you like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have done and would do it more but 99.9% of male profiles in the age range i seek only have extreme cock shot close ups and profile text that says "will fill in later" or "just ask" along with statuses branding all women as time wasters.

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

Never in my experience

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Whenever I find someone I want to get to know better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've had a few, but I find ladies tend to fab a pic and then I respond

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By * la carteCouple
over a year ago

Dublin

I messaged him (first), took note of some of his contributions on the forum and here we are as a couple

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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Received at beginning of joining then wet patch then continued throughout pandemic even recently it's not what you always may have but they might just be curious

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

I used to get an occasional first message from a solo female, before I turned 50....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I see someone I'm interested in I message.

Don't always receive a reply

but I message

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

We’ve been messaged first by women quite a few times…but certainly not nearly as often as we’d like!

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By *irtydevil666Man
over a year ago

bristol

I will consult the data from Sydney University.....

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By *aizyWoman
over a year ago

west midlands

I message first if I like the look of a profile.

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By *os19Man
over a year ago

Edmonton

I have occasionally been messaged first by single ladies but normally looking for advice about clubs with the occasional meet at a club or spa after developing a conversation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

16.3%

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

Considering how few exploratory messages I send, in my case woman generally message first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends how hot you are, innit?

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By *oeBeansMan
over a year ago

Derby

I assume the reason some women message me first do so based on my forum presence. Local women never message me first and I've stopped sending the first message too. I suppose the downside to that is not many of the forum interactions rsult in a meet due to various reasons.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll occasionally message first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nearly everyone I've met I messaged first.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have done and would do it more but 99.9% of male profiles in the age range i seek only have extreme cock shot close ups and profile text that says "will fill in later" or "just ask" along with statuses branding all women as time wasters.

Expand the age range?

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By *yourselfMan
over a year ago

Heworth

Not once in my experience.

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By *imply DeeWoman
over a year ago

Wherever

I have never messaged first, but then I’m not really looking for anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Depends how hot you are, innit? "

36.8 degrees or something like that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All my best meets as a single came from women that messaged first. Some women just block delete all messages and go look for what they want and that worked for me when single

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Depends how hot you are, innit?

36.8 degrees or something like that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never

I only actively messaged guys I’ve met

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By *hatMinxOverThereWoman
over a year ago

42 Wallaby Way

Not often at all. Bit too shy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not often at all. Bit too shy

Don’t be shy…. We’re all like minded

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By *weetiepie99Woman
over a year ago

cardiff

Never...but i know i really should, not sure whats holding me back to be honest

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By *yrdsisWoman
over a year ago

Gleam Street

I often do.. usually to no response...dunno if I'm no interesting or chaps just don't believe me

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By *all-flowerWoman
over a year ago

Nottinghamshire

I've sent the first message on occasions,

Usually when I've noticed that they've viewed my profile afew times..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never...but i know i really should, not sure whats holding me back to be honest"

Take the plunge

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally only get messages during forum games otherwise nothing x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I often do.. usually to no response...dunno if I'm no interesting or chaps just don't believe me

What’s your opening line ….

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rejection

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Rejection "

No way

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By *ean counterMan
over a year ago

Market Harborough / Kettering

Quite often!

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

I used to when I was looking to meet, on the rare occasions that I saw somebody that I liked the look of.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have no problem dropping someone a message first, it could be relating to a forum post or if I find their profile interesting.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"Rejection "

I winked you 11 months ago.....

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest

Very rarely. Was always quite the surprise when it happened.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pics of other people on single profiles.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Rejection

I winked you 11 months ago.....

Nope! Never happened

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Rejection

I winked you 11 months ago.....

Nope! Never happened

Me too… ghosted

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Rejection

I winked you 11 months ago.....

Nope! Never happened

Me too… ghosted

Utter rubbish! I tell you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes I had one yesterday. Then went weird today then blocked me .so strange

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Barely ever. Always think that the guys I like would never be interested in me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Rejection

I winked you 11 months ago.....

Nope! Never happened

Me too… ghosted

Utter rubbish! I tell you

Yeah yeah

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Barely ever. Always think that the guys I like would never be interested in me

Try your luck….

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By *agertha73Couple
over a year ago

Cardiff

"16.3%"

Precise.

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

I've sent quite a few first messages.I don't mind sending a first message if it's a profile I like or something that catches my attention like the forum's or a status.The worst they can do is ignore it after all.

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By *r SensualMan
over a year ago

London

Quite often in fact, I’ve had women message first from all over. Usually from a forum post or if they see we’re going to the same club and to meet in maybe one occasion.

Having a decent profile that stands out helps I guess.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In my experience, never. They seldom message second (reply) either.

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By *obandruthCouple
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Not very often.

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By *KloganMan
over a year ago

Ramsbottom

A few.. and they’ve all been really lovely and ridiculously ace humans to get to know.

I don’t know why, maybe it’s my profile? Location? Boredom? Who knows? but it’s a treat to get one in the inbox.

One in particular

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Most of the men I've met one on one I have messaged first.

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By *ity_BoyMan
over a year ago

London

My only meets resulted from women messaging me first. It's rare

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By *hateuroguyMan
over a year ago

North Wales

"My only meets resulted from women messaging me first. It's rare

Same. They messaged about a meet I'd posted

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By *iaisonseekerMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

They won't unless you chase them and pull their pigtails.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I had my “tape measure” pic’ on display, I’d get quite a few first contact from women. I guess the silly nature of the pic’ was a conversation starter.

I still get the odd first message from women, usually to compliment that profile made them giggle.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

See I would of thought it would be the other way around

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Barely ever. Always think that the guys I like would never be interested in me

Try your luck…."

Like fab a man roulette

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I’ve had that before so strange

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Shoot your shot and hope it lands I say

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Only via the forum

J xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don' think I've ever received a first message from a woman

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By *nimaginativeUsernameMan
over a year ago

Rochester, Kent

I’ve been first messaged by women several times.

Sometimes just due to one of my daft pics, but sometimes it’s led to a nice chat… and sometimes to an enjoyable meet

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Is it frequent

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By *hoirCouple
over a year ago

Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds

"If I see someone I'm interested in I message.

Don't always receive a reply

but I message"

I messaged you firs... Oh... Okay.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So what would I say is a Appealing profile in your opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Barely ever. Always think that the guys I like would never be interested in me

Try your luck….

Like fab a man roulette

Why not …..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Barely ever. Always think that the guys I like would never be interested in me

Had a wee peek at you, and there is nothing I see that would put me off.

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

They do but only when they see someone that they really like.

My partner and I started chatting because they messaged first

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By *eadinthecloudsMan
over a year ago

Manchester

Take note lads ^

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Quite regularly

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By *azzle99Woman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I ve been known to message first and often get a bemused response questioning if I’m real or not! Can’t win sometimes!

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

It happens.

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By *weetiepie99Woman
over a year ago

cardiff

"Never...but i know i really should, not sure whats holding me back to be honest

Take the plunge "

I may plunge deep and then there's no return

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By *astesLikeMagicWoman
over a year ago

Newcastle

If I ever I stumble upon a profile with messaging

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By *ust Passing ThroughMan
over a year ago

poole

Never from experience lol

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

Rarely...i message couples...prefer men to message first. But get more success from messaging

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By *ust Passing ThroughMan
over a year ago

poole

Women get too many messages I imagine. Us men are just too eager lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its slowed a little but i tend to get 3 or 4 fresh messages per week from lasses who find me nuts

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By *ust Passing ThroughMan
over a year ago

poole

Ha you are that charmed man!

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

We have received opening messages from ladies occasionally, one of whom we have met and things have gone very well with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Expand the age range?

That's the range im looking for. Everything else I can find elsewhere.

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By *ustdaveHantsMan
over a year ago

chippenham

After becoming a gold site supporter and clicking the see who's near I'm not surprised women don't message first. Counted 48 men before I got to 1 woman

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nowhere near as many from guys...!

Is always nice when I do receive and we connect and meet-up, since much prefer kissing the lady’s than I do a guy (sorry guys).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

About 99% off the time

well the ones who aren’t new

Most woman who have been here a while have there filters set tight

So they mail box’s don’t get bombared

If they see someone they like they message witch in turned voids the filter for that person

So normally it’s the woman messaging first so she can still keep filters up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They messages first just the once.

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

I haven't sent a first contact message since the beginning of 2020 so every conversation in the last 2½ years has been initiated by the women who have messaged first.

They all say that the effort I put into my profile and my forum engagement encourages them to say hello even if it's the first time they have made first contact with anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But if you’re finding the age range you’ve selected not suitable .. then surely you need to change ?

Expand the age range?

That's the range im looking for. Everything else I can find elsewhere. "

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By *D of funCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

Fab or a wink first

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By *aiseiMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Some will be comfortable doing so, some won’t.

The ones that are OK with it just need to be given sufficient reason to do so; that part is on you.

If it helps give any credibility, I had someone message me yesterday with a lovely compliment on my profile and we DM’d across the rest of the evening.

Make yourself someone people would like to talk to and they will.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They do message first, I have only sent a few first messages within the last 5 years on here…

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"After becoming a gold site supporter and clicking the see who's near I'm not surprised women don't message first. Counted 48 men before I got to 1 woman

Welcome to Fab

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By *rhugesMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

That's because of your age range lol you're look for boys and not men

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How often do women message first on here I guess it does happen but not as regular as I thought it would as a women what stops you from messaging someone you like "

0.000000000000000001% of the time.

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By *oiluvfunMan
over a year ago

Penrith

"Rejection

I winked you 11 months ago.....

Nope! Never happened

You have mail

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

Depends how attractive you are to them

Do you think professional athletes, musicians or movie stars have empty inboxes?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's because of your age range lol you're look for boys and not men"

Yes, aunty/nephew dynamics seem to work better with people substantially younger than me.

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By *umbiyaMan
over a year ago

Halifax

Hahaha. No. It’s not a thing that’s happened for me. They get swamped with messages so they don’t need to send my first messages to guys unless they’re like top 1% elite

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Once there was someone I liked on here so I messaged him telling him that I had a hotel booked and I'd like to meet him there, I even sent the booking confirmation so he knew it was a genuine offer.

He turned up and it was a great meet.

Typical fab messages I get from guys when my age filters are down are just graphically sexual comments.

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By *umbiyaMan
over a year ago

Halifax

"Once there was someone I liked on here so I messaged him telling him that I had a hotel booked and I'd like to meet him there, I even sent the booking confirmation so he knew it was a genuine offer.

He turned up and it was a great meet.

Typical fab messages I get from guys when my age filters are down are just graphically sexual comments. "

Damnnn. You didn’t even have to try. Guys will bone pretty much anything and I know I’d show up too.

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By *arco_pMan
over a year ago

Hednesford

never had a lady message first, saying that very rarely i see them reply either.

i just guess its the way off fab nowdays too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Once there was someone I liked on here so I messaged him telling him that I had a hotel booked and I'd like to meet him there, I even sent the booking confirmation so he knew it was a genuine offer.

He turned up and it was a great meet.

Typical fab messages I get from guys when my age filters are down are just graphically sexual comments.

Damnnn. You didn’t even have to try. Guys will bone pretty much anything and I know I’d show up too. "

I've been stood up at hotel meets and when hosting at my home many, many times.

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By *arco_pMan
over a year ago

Hednesford

"Once there was someone I liked on here so I messaged him telling him that I had a hotel booked and I'd like to meet him there, I even sent the booking confirmation so he knew it was a genuine offer.

He turned up and it was a great meet.

Typical fab messages I get from guys when my age filters are down are just graphically sexual comments.

Damnnn. You didn’t even have to try. Guys will bone pretty much anything and I know I’d show up too.

I've been stood up at hotel meets and when hosting at my home many, many times. "

more fool them for not showing to an extremley sexy lady, but then i guess that is what spoils it then as doesn't exactley fill you with confidence for the next one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never in my experience, mainly couples tend to message first or you might get a wink.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Once there was someone I liked on here so I messaged him telling him that I had a hotel booked and I'd like to meet him there, I even sent the booking confirmation so he knew it was a genuine offer.

He turned up and it was a great meet.

Typical fab messages I get from guys when my age filters are down are just graphically sexual comments.

Damnnn. You didn’t even have to try. Guys will bone pretty much anything and I know I’d show up too.

I've been stood up at hotel meets and when hosting at my home many, many times.

more fool them for not showing to an extremley sexy lady, but then i guess that is what spoils it then as doesn't exactley fill you with confidence for the next one"

I just move on. There is quite a surplus of men on here. Some are heaps of fun so I just focus on those rather than the flakes.

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By *arco_pMan
over a year ago

Hednesford

"Once there was someone I liked on here so I messaged him telling him that I had a hotel booked and I'd like to meet him there, I even sent the booking confirmation so he knew it was a genuine offer.

He turned up and it was a great meet.

Typical fab messages I get from guys when my age filters are down are just graphically sexual comments.

Damnnn. You didn’t even have to try. Guys will bone pretty much anything and I know I’d show up too.

I've been stood up at hotel meets and when hosting at my home many, many times.

more fool them for not showing to an extremley sexy lady, but then i guess that is what spoils it then as doesn't exactley fill you with confidence for the next one

I just move on. There is quite a surplus of men on here. Some are heaps of fun so I just focus on those rather than the flakes. "

good for you

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