FabSwingers.com forum: The "Great Advice For Men" thread

By *instonandLadyAstor OP Couple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

Men......

Never, and I cannot say this enough, never ask a woman who is eating ice cream straight out of the tub how she's doing.

Winston

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Why?

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By *affeine DuskMan
over a year ago

Caerphilly

I would never.

I'd be too busy proposing.

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By *heRazorsEdgeMan
over a year ago

Wales/ All over UK

"Men......

Never, and I cannot say this enough, never ask a woman who is eating ice cream straight out of the tub how she's doing.

Winston"

And never ever… No matter how magnificent…. compliment a woman on her mustache

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

And don’t even bother bringing an extra spoon from the kitchen

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By *instonandLadyAstor OP Couple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

"Men......

Never, and I cannot say this enough, never ask a woman who is eating ice cream straight out of the tub how she's doing.

Winston

And never ever… No matter how magnificent…. compliment a woman on her mustache"

*mops coffee from keyboard......

Winston

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By *idlandiaMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

However long you think oral on her should be. Double it...

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By *affeine DuskMan
over a year ago

Caerphilly

"Men......

Never, and I cannot say this enough, never ask a woman who is eating ice cream straight out of the tub how she's doing.

Winston

And never ever… No matter how magnificent…. compliment a woman on her mustache"

Or her dong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People you are interested in judge you by how you treat those you aren’t interested in.

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Don't tell someone they look good "for their age". It's not a compliment

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By *instonandLadyAstor OP Couple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

"Don't tell someone they look good "for their age". It's not a compliment

*checks sent box.........

Nope. Wasn't me.

Winston

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

The best advice for men that I know is to just accept you're always wrong

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

Never say no I don’t fancy chips/crisps/chocolate/whatever else, then nick all hers.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"However long you think oral on her should be. Double it..."

Unless she tells you otherwise

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

I had a dream about icecream last night. I got a banana split and got my dad a cone with two scoops while he waited outside with the dog but the woman took so long to serve us that his icecream melted all over my hand and the top scoop fell off. Not really sure what that means

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"Don't tell someone they look good "for their age". It's not a compliment

I was told this last week. I'm 30!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or ask her how big her feet are after she has stood on your foot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont take advice id rather make the mistakes

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By *oeBeansMan
over a year ago

Derby

"Don't tell someone they look good "for their age". It's not a compliment

Quite spry for an older woman

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

Never reply

"yes it does"

to the question

"does my bum look big in this?";

I did this once and it didn't end well for me.

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By *dventurous biMan
over a year ago

tesside

"Never reply

"yes it does"

to the question

"does my bum look big in this?";

I did this once and it didn't end well for me."

Nor should you say

“do you mean ‘does my bum look bigger in this’?”

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

"Don't tell someone they look good "for their age". It's not a compliment

I often tell people that they look good for somebody twice their age

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

"The best advice for men that I know is to just accept you're always wrong

Sadly this strategy lead me to a very dark place

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"The best advice for men that I know is to just accept you're always wrong

Sadly this strategy lead me to a very dark place"

I'm really sorry to read this. Hope you're in a better place now x

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By *instonandLadyAstor OP Couple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

When your lady is buying a new frock and she asks if it looks good and you need to tell her it doesn't the acceptable response is;

"it looks...*pause*...comfortable"

Rubbing your chin during the pause adds effect.

Winston

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By *ndauntedMan
over a year ago

wilts

"Never say no I don’t fancy chips/crisps/chocolate/whatever else, then nick all hers. "

That goes both ways

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you hear the word 'fine', it really isn't....

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By *he Artful TodgerMan
over a year ago

Yorkshire but travel

Never complain about the throw cushions, rugs, smelly sorry scented candies or all the other clutter around the house….

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By *ustintime69Man
over a year ago

Bristol

"People you are interested in judge you by how you treat those you aren’t interested in. "

That’s proper Zen-like

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"Never say no I don’t fancy chips/crisps/chocolate/whatever else, then nick all hers.

That goes both ways

Haha. I guess I never say I don’t fancy any of those things

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Men......

Never, and I cannot say this enough, never ask a woman who is eating ice cream straight out of the tub how she's doing.

Winston"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't tell someone they look good "for their age". It's not a compliment

I often tell people that they look good for somebody twice their age"

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"Never reply

"yes it does"

to the question

"does my bum look big in this?";

I did this once and it didn't end well for me."

I've had "yes but it's a good thing" and I didn't really mind that

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"However long you think oral on her should be. Double it...

Unless she tells you otherwise

This.

Because if it really takes you that long then maybe you need more practice......

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"If you hear the word 'fine', it really isn't...."

^true

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"If you hear the word 'fine', it really isn't....

^true"

And if the answer to 'what do you want to eat?' is 'anything'.......

It really isn't.

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By *ildmanYorksMan
over a year ago

Doncaster & Bembridge

"However long you think oral on her should be. Double it..."

2 hours may be a bit excessive

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By *isaB45Woman
over a year ago

Fabville

"However long you think oral on her should be. Double it...

2 hours may be a bit excessive

Absolutely this!

I'd be rather bored..

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By *yesgreenMan
over a year ago

north and south

"However long you think oral on her should be. Double it...

2 hours may be a bit excessive

"
I hope you don’t mind me saying but your not looking near your age 39

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Men......

Never, and I cannot say this enough, never ask a woman who is eating ice cream straight out of the tub how she's doing.

Winston"

This from experience as in last night op? I'd offer a Yorkie bar as a alternative as I need my ice-cream for my butter cup and Oreo milkshakes

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Never ever go out with your mate's no matter how many times she says

"No it's fine you go out, I'll just enjoy some me time"

That's code for you go out and leave me on my own your in big trouble matey.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My advice is know you’re enough.

All those things you hate about yourself or that make you feel insecure aren’t an issue for anyone else (unless you’re a total dick

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never ever go out with your mate's no matter how many times she says

"No it's fine you go out, I'll just enjoy some me time"

That's code for you go out and leave me on my own your in big trouble matey."

If he asks me if he can go out my reply would be, ‘why are you asking, you make your own choices’. A better question would be, do you need/want me for anything? or do you have anything planned for us?

If women are doing this then they have the problem.

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By *ollydoesWoman
over a year ago

Shangri-La

If you ask her if she wants anything from the shop and she says no thank you, don't ever come back from the shop with nothing for her.

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By *instonandLadyAstor OP Couple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

"Don't tell someone they look good "for their age". It's not a compliment

I was told this last week. I'm 30!"

But you older birds have so much more experience doing the sex.......

Winston

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Men......

Never, and I cannot say this enough, never ask a woman who is eating ice cream straight out of the tub how she's doing.

Winston

And never ever… No matter how magnificent…. compliment a woman on her mustache"

Oh I don't know. I think my Jimmy Edwards style handle bars are coming along nicely

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Don't tell someone they look good "for their age". It's not a compliment

True fact although it is intended as one

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

If a woman is upset about something, anything never EVER say "don't be silly"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do not ask if I’m gonna eat all that?

Yes I am!

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By *inda May SimmonsTV/TS
over a year ago

hexham

Never, ever, ever, ever compliment a woman on her pregnancy, without being absolutely certain she IS pregnant… like I mean she comes up to you and says “ hey, I am so pleased, I am pregnant!”

It might be ( in fact it was ) the case that she had just been drinking a lot more beer and not exercising as much as she used to!

But my goodness, she did look pregnant

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By *ollydoesWoman
over a year ago

Shangri-La

"Men......

Never, and I cannot say this enough, never ask a woman who is eating ice cream straight out of the tub how she's doing.

Winston

And never ever… No matter how magnificent…. compliment a woman on her mustache

Oh I don't know. I think my Jimmy Edwards style handle bars are coming along nicely

Not something I ever suffer from..I do find my eyebrows can grow lower down my face though these days

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Men......

Never, and I cannot say this enough, never ask a woman who is eating ice cream straight out of the tub how she's doing.

Winston

And never ever… No matter how magnificent…. compliment a woman on her mustache

Oh I don't know. I think my Jimmy Edwards style handle bars are coming along nicely

Not something I ever suffer from..I do find my eyebrows can grow lower down my face though these days

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By *instonandLadyAstor OP Couple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

Does my bum look big in this?

"Darling, your bum looks big in everything, your bum is the size of a small county" is apparently not the correct answer.

Who knew?

Winston

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"Don't tell someone they look good "for their age". It's not a compliment

I was told this last week. I'm 30!

But you older birds have so much more experience doing the sex.......

Winston "

Thanks Winston

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Does my bum look big in this?

"Darling, your bum looks big in everything, your bum is the size of a small county" is apparently not the correct answer.

Who knew?

Winston"

I would say "hey Siri play baby got back"

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

"If you ask her if she wants anything from the shop and she says no thank you, don't ever come back from the shop with nothing for her. "

Oh god no,it's even worse when the question is "what do you want for Christmas?" and the reply is "nothing"... Take it from, Christmas finishes very abruptly when you've taken them at their word... "It'll be lonely this Christmas, lonely and cold" sniff, sniff...

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By *uzie69xTV/TS
over a year ago

Maidstone

"Never reply

"yes it does"

to the question

"does my bum look big in this?";

I did this once and it didn't end well for me."

Ah but fashion change. Have you seen Kim Kardashian's bum? The answer is "yes and wonderful!"

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By *instonandLadyAstor OP Couple
over a year ago

Not where we seem to be...

"Don't tell someone they look good "for their age". It's not a compliment

I was told this last week. I'm 30!

But you older birds have so much more experience doing the sex.......

Winston

Thanks Winston

You're very welcome.

I said YOURE. VERY. WELCOME......

Winston

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By *ollydoesWoman
over a year ago

Shangri-La

"If you ask her if she wants anything from the shop and she says no thank you, don't ever come back from the shop with nothing for her.

She could of asked for a surprise...then not get them what they wanted you to get lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never, ever, ever, ever compliment a woman on her pregnancy, without being absolutely certain she IS pregnant… like I mean she comes up to you and says “ hey, I am so pleased, I am pregnant!”

It might be ( in fact it was ) the case that she had just been drinking a lot more beer and not exercising as much as she used to!

But my goodness, she did look pregnant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If a women drips food down her chin and when she wipes it off, never under any circumstances say “not that chin, the other one”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a women drips food down her chin and when she wipes it off, never under any circumstances say “not that chin, the other one”

I made that mistake in school. Danm those turkey twizlers were good but they made such a mess

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If a women drips food down her chin and when she wipes it off, never under any circumstances say “not that chin, the other one”

I made that mistake in school. Danm those turkey twizlers were good but they made such a mess"

Fuck Jamie Oliver!

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Don't think you're likely to be helping us, by asking what you could do less of, to avoid being nagged, or exacerbating unbearable PMT.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

When a woman becomes apoplectic about something you have said or done, the best way to defuse the situation is to say 'Aaaallllright dear, calm down'.

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By *r SproutMan
over a year ago

the middle

When a woman says "what?" It's not because she didn't hear you. She's just giving you a chance to change what you said.

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