FabSwingers.com forum: Would you finish someone with a text message

By *wencat OP Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

My friend been chatting to a guy for 18 months everyday on Skype he said he was divorced 7 years. he flew over recently and stayed with her went back to USA. after a week. was back home bout two weeks still talking every night on Skype. then just out the blue she got a text message I AM MARRIED I LOVE MY WIFE NO MORE CONTACT. I think this is awful. why a text message surely a phone call or face to face on Skype he has blocked all her phone calls and so has his family I just feel for her. what's your _iews on finishing through text message

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Obviously a lying scumbag no ethics or morals. What do people expect ? She MUST have known he was married

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Not nice but easier for him. If he had led her on the whole time, he never was going to overly concern himself with her feelings.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not nice but easier for him. If he had led her on the whole time, he never was going to overly concern himself with her feelings.

He was probably enjoying his secret double life, but all got too much. Dropped her like a hot potato as he probably never had real feelings for her.

Personally, I would never end a relationship by yext. I am more traditional and think a FAX is more personal!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Could it be the wife who found out and text you off his phone whilst he was tied up and dangled from the ceiling by his testicles??

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Having been on the receiving end of a dear jean text its not nice but some can't face doing it over the phone or in person they are problay afraid of the reaction...its not nice at the time to receive the text but what will be Will be i guess...

Sorry your friend had to go through that...x

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By *wencat OP Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Obviously a lying scumbag no ethics or morals. What do people expect ? She MUST have known he was married "
he said he was divorced 7 yrs ago she never saw his wife when he was on Skype don't know how he hid her but he did I carnt believe how good he was at lying

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By *wencat OP Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Could it be the wife who found out and text you off his phone whilst he was tied up and dangled from the ceiling by his testicles??

"
I wondered this aswell sounds. like something a jealous partner might do

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By *wencat OP Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Having been on the receiving end of a dear jean text its not nice but some can't face doing it over the phone or in person they are problay afraid of the reaction...its not nice at the time to receive the text but what will be Will be i guess...

Sorry your friend had to go. through that...x"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some people cannot handle face to face rejection/confrontation. It is a coward way and a cop out, however, it does not come across as a surprise if the gent turns out to be less than honourable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You'd be surprised what people can do when they want something so bad. Or the boredom at home is driving them mad. Been there nd got bitten.

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By *eminiman61Man
over a year ago

mansfield

His Mrs might have worked nights or he was at work...

Remember the time difference...... If it was night for her,what time was it for him?

He was just a lying cheating coward who might have now moved onto someone else. Or his conscience kicked in if hes got one?

Maybe your friend wernt all he expected. Some things get soooo hyped up in cyber reality

Tell her to find someone closer to home

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was made redundant by BT via text message lol

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By *wencat OP Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Was made redundant by BT via text message lol

"
Bloody hell that's shabby

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

As said previously some people can't handle rejection/confrontation in person so txt is a good way to get around that. However it tends to be the dishonourable ones that dump by txt. I hate confrontation but won't dump by txt face to face or at the worst a phone call

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By *bbandflowCouple
over a year ago

South Devon

"Not nice but easier for him. If he had led her on the whole time, he never was going to overly concern himself with her feelings.

He was probably enjoying his secret double life, but all got too much. Dropped her like a hot potato as he probably never had real feelings for her.

Personally, I would never end a relationship by yext. I am more traditional and think a FAX is more personal!

And they say romance is dead!

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By *reelove1969Couple
over a year ago

bristol

maybe he was telling the truth and he is divorced but decided he didnt want to continue the relationship so hey presto ...pretend u have a wife !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My friend been chatting to a guy for 18 months everyday on Skype he said he was divorced 7 years. he flew over recently and stayed with her went back to USA. after a week. was back home bout two weeks still talking every night on Skype. then just out the blue she got a text message I AM MARRIED I LOVE MY WIFE NO MORE CONTACT. I think this is awful. why a text message surely a phone call or face to face on Skype he has blocked all her phone calls and so has his family I just feel for her. what's your _iews on finishing through text message"

Well, it could be worse... A few years back, my Nephew had been chatting on the internet (pre-Skype) to a woman in the U.S. (Tennessee I think) for some while and they had declared themselves 'an item' even before meeting. His Mum (my ex sis in law) had even chatted with her too.

He flew over there after about the same length of time strangely (18 months) to be confronted with her husband and four, count them, four! kids.... She had led him to believe she was single, had a toddler and was on her own...

As for your friend, does sound like he was a very cunning, and that the text she got was most likely from his wife. Either way, bet he's hidden all the kitchen knives......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Was made redundant by BT via text message lol

Bloody hell that's shabby "

That's very commonplace these days - sacking by text.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

[Removed by poster at 14/11/12 10:55:11]

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Maybe it was just an excuse after meeting the woman and not liking what he saw/heard in real life.

In that situation, ie a "relationship" on skype then I don't think it would bother me being told by text that he didn't want to chat anymore.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In that situation, ie a "relationship" on skype then I don't think it would bother me being told by text that he didn't want to chat anymore."

Hmmmm...... makes you wonder, that one. If it was okay to have a 'relationship' of the cyber variety, why is it so bad to end it in a different cyber way..?

Ah, the modern World.... still getting over the passing of doffing one's hat to a lady personally......

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have you thought he could be lying that he's married just to put her off .....just a thought that's all

Dumping by txt is the cowards way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe after meeting her in the flesh he decided she didn't measure up to his fantasy of her. Maybe he was a scumbag after only one thing (but I find myself asking why he took 18mos to get it).

Maybe your friend should find someone local and offline and have a normal relationship.

If you have a relationship with someone that is purely online then it makes sense that all communications within that relationship is based online too - and so will any communications ending it. It started online, it ended online.

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"In that situation, ie a "relationship" on skype then I don't think it would bother me being told by text that he didn't want to chat anymore.

Hmmmm...... makes you wonder, that one. If it was okay to have a 'relationship' of the cyber variety, why is it so bad to end it in a different cyber way..?

Ah, the modern World.... still getting over the passing of doffing one's hat to a lady personally......

To be honest, I quoted "relationship" as some people see it as a relationshop. I see it as akin to the old pen pals scenario.

I am not sure it would bother me being dumped by text anyway to be honest, if I am being dumped I am being dumped, at least that way they can't see if you are blubbering

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dumped a guy by text this year!! Wasn't proud of myself, but knew it was the only way to be honest. He would have given me the world too but I just found him too dull for me. He still sends me a text every couple of weeks asking will I go out to the cinema bowling etc his msgs I now choose to ignore have given up telling him I didn't think we were right and him begging. So much as its not nice I would rather be dumped by text makes no difference how your told as your going to be dumped anyway. Only thing I can't stand is being ignored by a guy when you think you are getting on well!! Man up send me the your dumped text. Far better than having no balls in my opinion.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To be honest, I quoted "relationship" as some people see it as a relationship. I see it as akin to the old pen pals scenario."

Quite right - it IS a relationship, but so many people want a pen-pal/cyber relationship to be real, that they throw the rule book out the window - and that's when they get hurt.... invariably...

No different really, to all the posts/threads you read in the forums with people getting all upset over people who delete them, block them, stop chatting to them, and - shock! horror! - don't want to meet them..

Pork

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By *unky monkeyMan
over a year ago

in the night garden

I once got my mate to finish with my girlfriend for me. It was nearly her birthday and I didn't want to get her a present.

I went back out with her after her birthday but it was never the same.

Doctors and Nurses had lost it's magic and I found myself catching other girls during catchy-kissy. I was 11 at the time. True story!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shock Horror, Never by text

Email is free

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well ideally I would not finish with someone by text but then im that old that this wasnt invented in the olden days when I was dating.

I always went for the face to face scenario, you have to be brave and people deserve to be told this way. Admittedly I always sent my best friend to do this, but it was at least face to face with someone.

I think I would prefer email nowadays. More room to type the 'its not you its me' type bollocks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Was made redundant by BT via text message lol

Bunch of bast#*ds

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By *izzy RascallMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Been dumped by text or Facebook a few times. Worst was mrs of 9 years, 1 kid, + 2 step kids, mortgage, loans, we was even engaged.

Went from 'Engaged' to 'Single' on Facebook.

Ahh ok, Now I know what you want, or in this case dont.

I didnt even get to the 'Its Complicated' stage, just single. Fucking heartless bitch

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well ideally I would not finish with someone by text but then im that old that this wasnt invented in the olden days when I was dating.

I think I would prefer email nowadays. More room to type the 'its not you its me' type bollocks

Your not old just experienced .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think I would prefer email nowadays. More room to type the 'its not you its me' type bollocks

I would prefer honesty, I would just tell them "look it's all you, I am just fed up with compromising my perfection"

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By *edonism44Man
over a year ago

oldham

Been in hospital for nearly two weeks in December last year. I had feeding tube up my nose, cathata in and drip ..... Got a text from my then wife at 7am In the morning telling me it was over. She only came to see me once in the hospital .....

Shame she couldn't have waited until I was feeling a bit better , knocked me for six .....

So you see peolpe even finish a marriage by text these days

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By *wencat OP Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Been in hospital for nearly two weeks in December last year. I had feeding tube up my nose, cathata in and drip ..... Got a text from my then wife at 7am In the morning telling me it was over. She only came to see me once in the hospital .....

Shame she couldn't have waited until I was feeling a bit better , knocked me for six ..... that is awfull what a horrid thing to do hope what she did to u comes back on her

So you see peolpe even finish a marriage by text these days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is there a good way of finishing with someone? Best bet is to move on and live her life and forget about him. Plenty more fish in the sea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Happend to me twice. One three years ago after a six year relationship went on holiday to see my family and whilst i was away was dumpd. Then again last year after 2 n half years me n luck dont match lol

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By *isscheekychopsWoman
over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"Been dumped by text or Facebook a few times. Worst was mrs of 9 years, 1 kid, + 2 step kids, mortgage, loans, we was even engaged.

Went from 'Engaged' to 'Single' on Facebook.

Ahh ok, Now I know what you want, or in this case dont.

I didnt even get to the 'Its Complicated' stage, just single. Fucking heartless bitch"

Now I justify why I don't put my relationship status on facebook...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Is there another way of ending a relationship??? Thought that was what texting was invented for!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You can't dump someone by text!! That's just the wimps way out.

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