FabSwingers.com forum: Am I ugly?

By *osephSamuel90 OP Man
over a year ago

Warfield

Been on here for ages and never had any really luck. My messages are either read and not replied to or just deleted. I know I'm not the best looking man in the world but starting to think I'm just hideous to women

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

You're not ugly, OP, but many women won't answer messages from a profile with no avatar.

That probably doesn't help you.

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By *isstinseltoesWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

"You're not ugly, OP, but many women won't answer messages from a profile with no avatar.

That probably doesn't help you."

This plus sell yourself on your profile ,what are you offering meets ?most women look at a profile before deciding to read or delete a message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It could be many a reason, not necessarily because they find you physically unappealing.

Be sure your profile and messages are appealing to begin with.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't be to hard on yourself OP. It's a hard slog on this site for all men, even exceptional men.

Be authentic, be you and you never know what may come about. Like attracts like.

Use other social media apps, hedge your bets.

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By *coobyBoobyDooWoman
over a year ago

at work

"Been on here for ages and never had any really luck. My messages are either read and not replied to or just deleted. I know I'm not the best looking man in the world but starting to think I'm just hideous to women "

You’re not ugly but I prefer a smile

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By *osephSamuel90 OP Man
over a year ago

Warfield

Thanks for the advice guys. Was just feeling a bit frustrated and down from it

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By *untogetherCouple
over a year ago

Malaga, Spain, Not in U. K.

"Thanks for the advice guys. Was just feeling a bit frustrated and down from it"

You're not ugly! You just need to smile a bit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You aren't ugly.

It's not only messaging the right one, it's messaging them at the right time.

I delete guys messages that I think are hot purely because I can't be arsed/I'm annoyed/I'm tired.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

All about confidence mate. I don't think many people think too highly of themselves but give yourself a boost and aim to show the best side of yourself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh mate. It's nothing to do with how you look. Fab is rubbish for meeting women, as a guy - at least. You're better off not bothering and trying a different site. You'd fair better irl.

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

You’re not ugly but I prefer a smile

Me too!

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

--You are a single guy on a couples-centric site with 4 female friends. Are you doing that badly? Often couples (and sometimes even single women) are not interested in single straight men (though that can read single 'bi' men too to some people).

Yes there is a huge amount of single men on Fabswingers as well as couples - but that is kind of part of the problem! Admittedly there are a lot of single women in the Forum, but not so many on the site as a whole compared to men.

Actually, this probably doesn't get said much, but I think that sometimes really frustrated men come onto the forum and see such a large representation of women that they feel even worse! Unfortunately this forum doesn't quite represent the site as a hole though.

If you spend a while on the Forum you'll find that shags aren't exactly guaranteed on Fab too tbh.

Also if you don't already, you need to reach out via advanced Search (wink/fab first then use a good subject line to increase the chances of being noticed) and work a bit on your profile too perhaps (always work on this imo, changing it from time to time maybe too). --pt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah mate, you’re not. You are, however, a single male on Fab hunting for available pussy.

We all struggle.

Except those super fit really handsome ones.

But then those types win in all aspects of life, don’t they, so the rest of us just have to suck it up and live with it!

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By *TDHGentMan
over a year ago

Worcs

[Removed by poster at 19/06/22 17:37:08]

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By *valanche1001Man
over a year ago

Leeds

You’re not mate, as per the post above the odds will never be in your favour and I have been met with deafening silence after sending my mug shot. I’m no Quasimodo but nor am I Brad Pitt, spend time on the forums and let your personality shine through. I think you’ll find greater success with nicer people if I’m honest.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I mean you can see it that way but I just found it just made me cry so just stopped looking for people to meet on fab. Can’t think rejection is because your ugly If you don’t message anyone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean you can see it that way but I just found it just made me cry so just stopped looking for people to meet on fab. Can’t think rejection is because your ugly If you don’t message anyone.

Yeah alright Roll Safe

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By *riving_Home_For_MimiWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

If you sent me a msg, I probably wouldn't reply because your bio tells me nothing, and I cba asking questions.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I mean you can see it that way but I just found it just made me cry so just stopped looking for people to meet on fab. Can’t think rejection is because your ugly If you don’t message anyone.

Yeah alright Roll Safe

I wish I could’ve posted the gif but you know the reference and that makes me happy enough. Miss the hood documentary man

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By *r laidbackMan
over a year ago

London & New Brighton

Take this site as a past time, you really can't doubt your own self-esteem, your value is not decided by others.

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By *nnasHammerCouple
over a year ago

The Upside Down

Don’t be too hard on yourself OP. Nothing wrong with the way you look. But a smile wouldn’t hurt. Maybe get yourself over to a few social events and meet people there. It’s the best way to get the most out of Fab. Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're not ugly at all OP, you look like a treat in my eyes.

I'm not sure what you message women. I usually don't bother with copy and pasted messages, people that ask if I'm ok and I don't appreciate lewd messages off bat either. But that's just me, we're all different.

Wishing you all the best moving forward x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Smile!

The amount of guys photos I see where they look thoroughly miserable, is countless.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My advice is to go to a social event and or a club to meet people face to face, introduce yourself politely and offer to give your profile name and ask if it's ok to keep in touch. Fab is great to keep in touch with people you already know but very hard to arrange a blind date on. Once you have been to a club then post on here about your experience and wait for people to respond. It's all about networking and making friends first. Hope that helps x

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By *ana_nana_MATTMAN!Man
over a year ago

Haywood Village, Weston-super-Mare

Firstly, you haven't set a profile pic. If someone sees a message from black silhouette, it's almost guaranteed to be deleted without being read.

Secondly, the photos you have on your profile are bland. You have a face pic, which is great, but you're not even smiling. You can do a lot better.

Thirdly, your profile text is only one sentence long. You need to sell yourself. Women are looking to meet a person, so you need to show them the person behind the profile.

Overall, your profile comes accross as if your put no effort into it whatsoever, and nobody wants to fuck someone who doesn't put the effort in.

Take a bit of time, and search for all the men in a 20 mile radius of you - that is your competition, that is who you need to stand out from.

You're not ugly, you're just not making yourself look attractive.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you look like Jamie Dornan

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By *romagefraisWoman
over a year ago

Sunderland

No, but you dint look happy like.

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By *yron69Man
over a year ago

Fareham

If I was a woman….I wouldn’t meet a man with a plant growing out of his head…

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By *r easy1981Man
over a year ago

leeds

Very hard for us men to get meets off here so don’t think to much in to it

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By *affeine DuskMan
over a year ago

Caerphilly

Not ugly at all OP, y'look good dude.

Nice eyes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Out of interest OP, why do you assume its your looks that are causing the issue?

To ask it another way, do you believe that you only need good looks to get women interested in you?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tell a few jokes & go as a Jack Whitehall look alike

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By *iss KinkWoman
over a year ago

North West

I don’t think it’s your looks getting you no where

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By *ack 500Man
over a year ago

stafford

[Removed by poster at 19/06/22 19:17:02]

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By *ack 500Man
over a year ago

stafford

"You aren't ugly.

It's not only messaging the right one, it's messaging them at the right time.

I delete guys messages that I think are hot purely because I can't be arsed/I'm annoyed/I'm tired.

Spot on timing is everything

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"I don’t think it’s your looks getting you no where"

I agree x

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By *JstarsoloWoman
over a year ago

Wombwell, Barnsley

You look fine, but like everyone else has said a smile would be nice, and a profile pic. Let your personality shine through. Your profile doesn't say a lot. And don't rely on fab. Get out and meet people.

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

Is that a c******s plant growing out of your head OP?

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By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago

Nottingham

Nope, not ugly.

Your profile does not sell you well though when there's easily 20 men to every woman on here.

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By *osephSamuel90 OP Man
over a year ago

Warfield

"Out of interest OP, why do you assume its your looks that are causing the issue?

To ask it another way, do you believe that you only need good looks to get women interested in you?

Mr"

Don't get me wrong I know looks aren't the only thing, but on a site like here they're what gets you in the door so to speak

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

"Out of interest OP, why do you assume its your looks that are causing the issue?

To ask it another way, do you believe that you only need good looks to get women interested in you?

Don't get me wrong I know looks aren't the only thing, but on a site like here they're what gets you in the door so to speak "

And if you think that's the case then have a profile pic.

Messages get filtered before theyve been opened, let alone read. No pic and they might not check out your profile and probably won't even bother reading what you've written.

Take on everything that people have said

Good pics, smile, effort in your profile.

Don't be a knob.

Expect nothing

Offer cake

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Only kidding, good luck OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Out of interest OP, why do you assume its your looks that are causing the issue?

To ask it another way, do you believe that you only need good looks to get women interested in you?

Don't get me wrong I know looks aren't the only thing, but on a site like here they're what gets you in the door so to speak "

I think this is perhaps where you're going wrong. The "site like here" is used in different ways by different people. Looks don't have any more effect on here than anywhere else tbh. Understanding that different people want different things (and perhaps different to what you want) is key to being able to spark interest.

Well, that's what I believe. Maybe I'm wrong.

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By *osephSamuel90 OP Man
over a year ago

Warfield

"I think you look like Jamie Dornan"

I wish

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By *riving_Home_For_MimiWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

"Is that a c******s plant growing out of your head OP?"

It's a bamboo

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

Five people telling you to have a profile pic

It takes seconds

You haven't done it

Do you want help or attention?

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"I think you look like Jamie Dornan"

I can see that too to be fair. Nose and eyes

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

"Is that a c******s plant growing out of your head OP?

It's a bamboo"
Officer, honest.

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By * U mineMan
over a year ago

Fun

Nobody meets anybody it's a chat site

But somebody is having fun.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh dear op....its not about looks on this place....look at my mug and your see an ugly guy with too many women on the go...sometimes its too much....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm straight guy so all guys are ugly to me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never let fab gives you any doubts about how beautiful you are, we are all beautiful in other peoples eyes, some times I send a face pic and i get blocked other times I send the same pic and I get you are pretty back, there is few people out there that your paths didn't cross yet thinks you are beautiful.. because you are

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

What makes you think it's down to your looks as opposed to what you write in your messages, what you have written in your profile or the pictures in your gallery? There are a number of things that can lead to a lack of interest. Thinking your issue is down to your looks implies that you think you are getting everything else right. Are you really sure that's the case?

You are one of thousands upon thousands of men looking for something on here. You have to be at a good standard in everything to stand a chance,and even then you can be easy overlooked because of numbers. Thinking it's down to one single thing that you have very little control over is not wise because you might miss things you can change.

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By *asepaul71Man
over a year ago

Buxton

"What makes you think it's down to your looks as opposed to what you write in your messages, what you have written in your profile or the pictures in your gallery? There are a number of things that can lead to a lack of interest. Thinking your issue is down to your looks implies that you think you are getting everything else right. Are you really sure that's the case?

Spot on

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By *ampWithABrainWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Looks may OPEN the door they won’t get you through it certainly not in my case

From reading the thread it seems you started with no avatar pic and precious little bio.

I don’t even open messages until I’ve checked the profile first (and in stealth mode)

There are a number of things too long to list that would mean I won’t even bother opening the message before deleting but a lack of decent pics (not all dick pics, put some imagination in, smile or at least not frown in face pics…), whether they can Accom or not, veris (quality and nature), whether they use the word “discrete” 20 million times (which usually means they’re married and wife has no clue!

Also means they can’t spell)…

I’ve been on here a loooong time and you just learnt certain types of profile to avoid.

And I’m sure people dislike my profile for any number of reasons but as has been said it’s a numbers game on here for men. You’re competing against many more not only better looking guys but guys who have good profiles, understand how fab works, and know how to make themselves stand out in a good way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Looks may OPEN the door they won’t get you through it certainly not in my case

From reading the thread it seems you started with no avatar pic and precious little bio.

I don’t even open messages until I’ve checked the profile first (and in stealth mode)

Also means they can’t spell)…

I’ve been on here a loooong time and you just learnt certain types of profile to avoid.

Nice rack

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By *ampWithABrainWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Forgot to inc instantly delete boring “how are you?” As a 1st message, messages that are hyper sexual for 1st message, faf, “I’m gonna be in your town next week…” etc etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Am I ugly?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Am I ugly? "
serious question

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Thanks for the advice guys. Was just feeling a bit frustrated and down from it"

Patience mate, and be nice to folk and it'll be reciprocated. Not saying your not nice btw.

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By *exy4youxxWoman
over a year ago

Pontefract

Your not ugly but I don't like beards and wouldn't even reply to your message after reading your boring profile... your profile should reflect what you can offer here and what you are looking for and your profile is similar to other males on here just after sex

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By *exy4youxxWoman
over a year ago

Pontefract

"Am I ugly? serious question"

Not really sure how you expect an answer with that 1 pic showing bottom of your face and another boring profile so wouldn't matter how your looks are no effort on profile amounts to no effort in the bedroom amounts to no meets

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By *ampWithABrainWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

“no effort on profile amounts to no effort in the bedroom amounts to no meets”

Yep agree with this. If typing a message takes too much effort…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try and relate your messages to what you have read from the profile. For instance, if it's a couple your messaging and they say they don't meet alone then reference it saying you've read and respect it so you would never ask. I think showing you've took the time to read a bit about people can be a huge factor.

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By *adCherriesCouple
over a year ago

Cheshire/Northwest

It's not about looks at all, it's just extremely hard for guys to get meets as there are lots of them.

You need thick skin for fab and don't take it personally. Maybe write more on your profile, so people can gauge your personality/interests.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you ugly? No, that’s the truth.

You’ll have to figure out the reason why it’s hard to get to talk to a someone you’d like to on here, when you do, can you let everyone else know?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can’t help but read this in a whiney voice.

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

The first thing most people do when receiving a message is look at the senders profile.

This post is longer than your profile text.

That alone will make people move on to the next profile.

It's nothing to do with how you look.

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