FabSwingers.com forum: whats wrong with me

By *lueboy1905 OP Man
over a year ago

woodhouse

hi all i dont know whats so wrong with me but i dont get any messages or a sniff of a meet. where am i goin wrong xxx love to you all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No single male does

Welcome to fab

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Public photos help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"hi all i dont know whats so wrong with me but i dont get any messages or a sniff of a meet. where am i goin wrong xxx love to you all "
no public pics, you say you don’t have time for long meets so people will assume you’re just after a quickie. You say you need sorting out asap so people will assume you’re selfish in bed. Would be much better to tell people what you can do for them.

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By *lueboy1905 OP Man
over a year ago

woodhouse

ok maybe a rethink is needed thank you

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

No profile pic, just a silhouette

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe the fact you have no public photos and you can’t meet ?

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"highly sexed and need sorting out". Sounds a bit selfish !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everytime I see one of these threads I just subconsciously hear DJ Khaled going "ANOTHER ONE"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No profile pic and your bio is just a sentence saying what you can’t do.

Would you meet you?

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By *lueboy1905 OP Man
over a year ago

woodhouse

i dont see that on my profile xx

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

No public pics would be a straight delete from me ,

Plus you say you can't do long meets and that sounds like you want a quick shag and go op.

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

""highly sexed and need sorting out". Sounds a bit selfish ! "

How charming

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

If somebody looked at your profile - avatar, text and gallery - what would you think they would see as selling points for you?

What are your messages like? Most messages we get from single men are awful and deserve nothing other than going straight in the bin. What do you say when you first contact somebody?

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Perhaps your expectations are askew? Men have to sell themselves really well, by all of their communication, actions and effort levels. Profiles are the key reason men miss out, as you'll see from the numerous posts about them. Get to swinging clubs, so this swinging lifestyle website is in synch with this

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

Alternatively OP, just try not to care (easier said than done I know). Oh and be patient

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By *JstarsoloWoman
over a year ago

Wombwell, Barnsley

Probably add a bit more to your profile about what you can offer, rather than what you can't do. Also photos help. Have to stand out in the crowd on here, and even then nothing's guaranteed.

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By *inger_SnapWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

One photo and an uninspiring bio. That's why!

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By *jc65Man
over a year ago

gillingham

I think that’s a lot of us

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By *ack 500Man
over a year ago

stafford

Don’t worry sunshine , you are in a long list with lots of other guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi OP, don’t get disheartened, FAB can be less than expected by some single guys.

I see you’ve heeded advice from this thread and added a public photo. Nice to see someone taking the advice they ask for, so high fives for that.

As for the bio; you’re clearly struggling, totally understandable. A good idea would be to peruse single chap profiles who have been successful in the areas you want to be successful in and take some hints from their bios. Don’t steal other peoples’ words, one it’s bad form and two, your own words will reflect you better. However, nothing wrong with taking inspiration.

Wishing you well.

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By *lueboy1905 OP Man
over a year ago

woodhouse

love the difference in opinions here some offering actual advice others so aggressive

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The effort you put in is the effort you get back

If you don’t put in the effort to your shop window no one will buy your goods

Also clubs are grate for single guys

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

U good looking young man! Just bit of patience sure it will happen for u good luck! X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"love the difference in opinions here some offering actual advice others so aggressive "

I don’t see anyone being aggressive on the thread

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By *lueboy1905 OP Man
over a year ago

woodhouse

maybe aggressive is to strong but a few are lets say unhelpful

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By *r SproutMan
over a year ago

the middle

Here are your options to possibly getting a (or more) meets on here.

Go to a club

Go to a group social

Look at popular male profiles and see what they are doing

Be yourself

Be different

Stand out from the rest

Read profiles before messaging

When you do message make it unique to that profile

Don’t send dick pics with a first message

Remember your profile is your shop window put on your best display

And the last one is one a good friend told me.

Effort in equals results out.

Some say the ratio of men to women/couples is 100/1 said to be so it will be harder to get a meet, so please keep that in mind

Good luck in your journey

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Please keep it to the forums, OP.

I read your example message and it would be an instant delete from most people. It has zero content. Anybody who might be interested (and there wouldn't be many) would go to your profile and find nothing.

You could write exactly the same thing to 10,000 women. You need to engage with the person you are writing to. Take an interest in them. You show none of that.

It would be like trying to get a date by putting fliers through people's doors that say "I'm a guy looking for a date". How many people do you think would reply to something like that?

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By *JstarsoloWoman
over a year ago

Wombwell, Barnsley

"maybe aggressive is to strong but a few are lets say unhelpful "

The comments are mostly helpful and quite tame compared to other similar threads.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You need to sort out your profile as it comes across negative , you can’t do long meets which makes it sound like you are in a relationship or are just looking for a fuck and go situation neither of which are appealing traits I would imagine .

You then state that “ you are highly sexed and need sorting out “ this feeds into the fuck and go narrative and also makes you sound as if any meets are about you making you sound selfish and self centred in bed .

Need to remember that ladies are more than spoilt for choice on here , they are actually hounded so try and make more of an effort with your prof .

Having more than one photo helps as well .

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

You get out of FAB what you put into it.

Unfortunately you are in a sea of thousands of guys and so you have to stand out.

Guys who are unimaginative in their profile aren’t going to stand out. Guys who are unimaginative in their pics aren’t going to stand out.

Women/couples can just move on to the next guys profile if yours is bland.

Take more pics, put more effort in your profile and you’ll increase your chances of being seen.

You’ve started this thread as a look at me, so now is a perfect opportunity to get noticed.

Good luck

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By *BootyfulDayWoman
over a year ago

…

No one on here is being aggressive but if you search the forums you’ll see lots of advice for single guys.

Here’s one search result….

https://m.fabswingers.com/forum-search/Message%2bAdvice

Ask yourself this, why should someone reply to you/meet you?

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By *aunchy RaccoonsCouple
over a year ago

Exeter

Maybe it's because you're looking to meet 99 year olds. I doubt there are many on here.....

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

"You need to sort out your profile as it comes across negative , you can’t do long meets which makes it sound like you are in a relationship or are just looking for a fuck and go situation neither of which are appealing traits I would imagine .

Need to remember that ladies are more than spoilt for choice on here , they are actually hounded so try and make more of an effort with your prof .

Having more than one photo helps as well .

Fuck and go meets are appealing to some of us women! Obvs not all! I'm almost bundling them out the door after!

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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

"maybe aggressive is to strong but a few are lets say unhelpful "

Most of them are longer than your profile text, so there's that....

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair

Sprouty's given the best advice:

Unless you've already done so, attend a few 'fab organised socials'. Meet some people, make some friends and build your Fab nexus...without any expectations or entitlement.

Get some inspiration and ideas from those new contacts and their profiles: the narrative they've written, the photographs they've taken and their general demeanor on the forums.

It's not a panacea to your issues or frustrations; it's a start.

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