FabSwingers.com forum: Hundreds of messages

By *arialoue OP Woman
over a year ago

bradford

I keep reading about women getting hundreds of messages daily, well i can truly say that this isnt the case for me, n even when I do get the odd message, including if im not interested i do reply

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By *ayjay199xMan
over a year ago

london

I’ll message you 100 times tomorrow

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

As an experiment a few years ago, I set up a single woman's profile. I put up no photos and my text just said that I'm a man and only message me if you are utterly stupid.

I got several messages a minute (literally) from men asking for a shag. The polite ones told me how sexy I was.

It sounds like you've got off lightly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I rarely hit double figures.

Not including those off a couple of friends.

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By *iss.ddWoman
over a year ago

Leeds + Newcastle

Your profile is set to hidden, maybe that slows down the messaging to you?

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By *ittleMissCaliWoman
over a year ago

all loved up

I rarely get huge amounts of message's either x

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By *arialoue OP Woman
over a year ago

bradford

"I keep reading about women getting hundreds of messages daily, well i can truly say that this isnt the case for me, n even when I do get the odd message, including if im not interested i do reply "
i forgot to mention that when i first joined i did get a fair few but still not loads

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

I don't either.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you want hundreds of messages or do you think because you don't get them that other women don't?

I have filters on my account but even so, I haven't had hundreds of messages since the first week I joined. If I post photos/video I might get 30 a day. Im not envious of those who receive hundreds or even twice as many as I get. It would be awful.

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By *ull English with teaMan
over a year ago

London

It’s a problem I have to deal with as well…

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By *urls and DressesWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere near here

I don’t get hundreds but I do get a lot. A lot better since tightened my settings. I’ve hidden my profile but my inbox gets overwhelming and makes me really dislike men at times

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By *ob08Man
over a year ago

Macclesfield

You clearly must be a bot as most women's profiles delight in telling everyone they have 100+ messages an hour

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I keep reading about women getting hundreds of messages daily, well i can truly say that this isnt the case for me, n even when I do get the odd message, including if im not interested i do reply i forgot to mention that when i first joined i did get a fair few but still not loads"

It depends on a lot of factors. How new your profile is, your age group, the area you live in, how active you are on the site etc.

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

Your set to hidden. That's probably why

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You clearly must be a bot as most women's profiles delight in telling everyone they have 100+ messages an hour

I've never seen a woman's profile saying this

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"You clearly must be a bot as most women's profiles delight in telling everyone they have 100+ messages an hour

I've never seen a woman's profile saying this

There's the odd one or two, especially in local updates

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By *ob08Man
over a year ago

Macclesfield

"You clearly must be a bot as most women's profiles delight in telling everyone they have 100+ messages an hour

I've never seen a woman's profile saying this

There are plenty.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I keep reading about women getting hundreds of messages daily, well i can truly say that this isnt the case for me, n even when I do get the odd message, including if im not interested i do reply "

For how long as your profile been hidden?

Could this be the reason for lack of messages?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I normally get 20ish message a day, but when I put up new pics it will go into the hundreds very easily. Also I have asked guys not to verify me as when it says that I have been on the update if go's up as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You clearly must be a bot as most women's profiles delight in telling everyone they have 100+ messages an hour

I've never seen a woman's profile saying this

There's the odd one or two, especially in local updates"

That's quite different from "most women's profiles" though isn't it? I think he's just having a dig.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You clearly must be a bot as most women's profiles delight in telling everyone they have 100+ messages an hour

I've never seen a woman's profile saying this

There are plenty."

Sure

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I had hundreds of message sheets first day I joined. Before I put pictures or text on.

Since then not even close. Most days it's maybe 4 or 5. If I put a new picture up I'll maybe get 10, 20?

I've not got particularly tight filters any more, but I just figure that now everyone can see my face that's been enough to stop the messages!

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By *ob08Man
over a year ago

Macclesfield

"You clearly must be a bot as most women's profiles delight in telling everyone they have 100+ messages an hour

I've never seen a woman's profile saying this

There are plenty.

Sure"

There are, just because you havnt seen them doesn't mean there aren't any

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I had hundreds of message sheets first day I joined. Before I put pictures or text on.

Since then not even close. Most days it's maybe 4 or 5. If I put a new picture up I'll maybe get 10, 20?

I've not got particularly tight filters any more, but I just figure that now everyone can see my face that's been enough to stop the messages!

Please don't be so mean to yourself and your lovely face

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You clearly must be a bot as most women's profiles delight in telling everyone they have 100+ messages an hour

I've never seen a woman's profile saying this

There are plenty.

Sure

There are, just because you havnt seen them doesn't mean there aren't any"

I said sure

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"I had hundreds of message sheets first day I joined. Before I put pictures or text on.

Since then not even close. Most days it's maybe 4 or 5. If I put a new picture up I'll maybe get 10, 20?

I've not got particularly tight filters any more, but I just figure that now everyone can see my face that's been enough to stop the messages!

Please don't be so mean to yourself and your lovely face

Maybe they don't need to message because they already have the face/boobs combo to wank over?

(Is that better?

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I had hundreds of message sheets first day I joined. Before I put pictures or text on.

Since then not even close. Most days it's maybe 4 or 5. If I put a new picture up I'll maybe get 10, 20?

I've not got particularly tight filters any more, but I just figure that now everyone can see my face that's been enough to stop the messages!

Please don't be so mean to yourself and your lovely face

Maybe they don't need to message because they already have the face/boobs combo to wank over?

(Is that better?

Much

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

I use tight filters ,but doubt I'd be inundated anyway.

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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago

Peterborough

"I rarely get huge amounts of message's either x"
+

I like it when people write to me and have intelligent chats

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"As an experiment a few years ago, I set up a single woman's profile. I put up no photos and my text just said that I'm a man and only message me if you are utterly stupid.

I got several messages a minute (literally) from men asking for a shag. The polite ones told me how sexy I was.

It sounds like you've got off lightly. "

---Is this the male talking here or the female? I don't see how this connects to the OP, who's been here over a year? It doesn't seem quite right comparing her to something that didn't exist I think.

Ok assuming this post is accurate (what were your motivations for making this fake profile I wonder?), one way to explain those results is simple New Profile attention. Many hare will mainly Search for 'New Profiles', esp if they are up to scratch with their area by regularly using Search. I'm sure that Fab has other ways of promoting new profiles too.

I'm not sure what you were looking for with this experiment, but a lot of people do spam their messages on Fab alas, and for a number of reasons I expect (including frustration and youthfulness - and what age was you fictitious woman I wonder?). Spamming of course explains the "you seem lovely/sexy, are you interested in sex?" messages you got (or however your 'polite ones' went) despite the deliberately off-putting profile you created.

I think that not seeing any picture at all is unlikely to be much of a hindrance for many people in terms of getting in touch - it either won't matter so much, they could gamble, or actually imagine whatever they like.

Also, some of the settings you may have had (such as web publicity) and of course the location you picked for your cipher could have made a big difference too.----

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By *iromancergirl1Woman
over a year ago

bolton

If I’m on hear a lot in a day then I’ll get a lot of messages if I post a pic I’ll get well over a 100 messages so it is possible

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"If I’m on hear a lot in a day then I’ll get a lot of messages if I post a pic I’ll get well over a 100 messages so it is possible "

-Actually being online, active and posting pics is prob the best recipe for attention, especially if a pic starts to 'trend' and its numbers take off for you.

It's easy to be on here and have no attention at all though, and if you post some pics at really popular times they can be left in the dust too. (you can always repost them another time though!) pt--

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i'd message you but I know I'm not your type, so why bug you by doing so

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

When I was new I absolutely got hundreds of messages.

When I allowed messages, after the first few months, 30 a day or more if I posted a picture or a status.

(My filters are currently set to fuck off, so I get close to none).

But apart from the initial newbie frenzy, I think every woman's experience is different.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t get 100’s of messages but I do get some…. I think it depends on how active you are and as said how often you post pics and if they are public and what time

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By *ongandthickMan
over a year ago

exmouth

"I rarely get huge amounts of message's either x"
I find that hard to believe.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I keep reading about women getting hundreds of messages daily, well i can truly say that this isnt the case for me, n even when I do get the odd message, including if im not interested i do reply "

Good for you

Some of us just can't be fucked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If some people want to court attention on here and get lots of messages - good for them. There seems to be a bit of shaming of those who do get lots of messages. And Some women are just bloody gorgeous and naturally attract more attention. They're not necessarily seeking it. Posting photos is often for the individual, and not seeking attention. Although men seem to assume women only take photos for their pleasure - I certainly don't.

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By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago

Deepest darkest Peru

Can be anything from 10-30 messages daily. If I post a new pic it usually goes up. I don’t post pics to receive messages though I just enjoy taking them

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"If some people want to court attention on here and get lots of messages - good for them. There seems to be a bit of shaming of those who do get lots of messages. And Some women are just bloody gorgeous and naturally attract more attention. They're not necessarily seeking it. Posting photos is often for the individual, and not seeking attention. Although men seem to assume women only take photos for their pleasure - I certainly don't. "

If some people get lots of messages, they get lots of messages.

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"Can be anything from 10-30 messages daily. If I post a new pic it usually goes up. I don’t post pics to receive messages though I just enjoy taking them

Wet shirts especially welcome

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice rack

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"i'd message you but I know I'm not your type, so why bug you by doing so"

^^^^^this, and the 'they're out of my league' thoughts

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

If some people get lots of messages, they get lots of messages."

Yes it's no big deal either way. Neither group should feel shame or be shamed. I'm fine not being a lot of people type. I can then just focus on the guys who meet my criteria and I meet theirs.

I always wonder those guys who never get a reply only ever message the kind of woman who is likely to get the hundreds of messages a day.

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By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

The only issue I've ever had with people talking about the high number of messages they get is people talking about the high number of messages they get.

Whether you get 7 or 700 it has no bearing on anyone else.

The content of messages is irrelevant if the majority of them remain unread.

Someone claims to have 500 unread messages and that is almost like a challenge to others to chip in and say that's nothing I've 700 unread.

No one has control over the amount they receive but they do have the option of using the available filters to reduce those numbers if they don't have the time or energy to read them all.

Unless of course they need those numbers as a yardstick which regardless of what some like to claim is very much a thing especially in chat groups when screenshots of that little yellow box are shared.

If you really do get hundreds of messages a week and know that you will never ever read more than a handful it's very easy to bulk delete.

Some people will of course ask why they should have to use filters?

They don't have to use them at all but you have to wonder why they choose not to if they they are having such a difficult time.

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Me either. I only get loads if I upload a new pic, but certainly not hundreds.

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By *ayHaychMan
over a year ago

Leeds (Home) / Sheffield (Work)

"As an experiment a few years ago, I set up a single woman's profile. I put up no photos and my text just said that I'm a man and only message me if you are utterly stupid.

I got several messages a minute (literally) from men asking for a shag. The polite ones told me how sexy I was.

It sounds like you've got off lightly. "

I used the filter on snapchat which makes you look like a woman, when it first came out, and uploaded a pic. My profile said I’m a guy, my profile information said I’m a guy, and I even had dick pics up. Still didn’t stop loads of guys messaging within the first 10-15mins

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By *agic.MMan
over a year ago

Orpington

"As an experiment a few years ago, I set up a single woman's profile. I put up no photos and my text just said that I'm a man and only message me if you are utterly stupid.

I got several messages a minute (literally) from men asking for a shag. The polite ones told me how sexy I was.

It sounds like you've got off lightly.

Whaaaaaa

?! ....I think I'll try this as well

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

I get the most messages when I am up very late. Lots of horny men busy wanking.

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By *ayHaychMan
over a year ago

Leeds (Home) / Sheffield (Work)

Whaaaaaa

?! ....I think I'll try this as well

. "

Honestly! When I told them I was a guy they still replied with “lets meet now” or such messages. I understand why women have enough.

Then there is fabguys which is a whole different ballgame regarding messages…

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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Bedford (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)

No one has control over the amount they receive but they do have the option of using the available filters to reduce those numbers if they don't have the time or energy to read them all.

... well from a female perspective you can fully control the amount of messages received ...restrict everyone and take the lead and message first ...too radical for some maybe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one has control over the amount they receive but they do have the option of using the available filters to reduce those numbers if they don't have the time or energy to read them all.

... well from a female perspective you can fully control the amount of messages received ...restrict everyone and take the lead and message first ...too radical for some maybe

I've tried this a few times. It's too radical for me as I'd never approach the men I'm interested in. Too insecure!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe it is because you don't have many pictures up, and no explicit pictures. Which is absolutely fine by the way. I guess it could be your location too?

But don't worry too much about it and just be yourself. As someone who can receive hundreds of messages, it's nothing special, all the same shite, gets very boring quickly.

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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Bedford (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)

No one has control over the amount they receive but they do have the option of using the available filters to reduce those numbers if they don't have the time or energy to read them all.

... well from a female perspective you can fully control the amount of messages received ...restrict everyone and take the lead and message first ...too radical for some maybe

I've tried this a few times. It's too radical for me as I'd never approach the men I'm interested in. Too insecure!"

I can appreciate that ...but what's the worst that can happen? ...a rude reply and then you know that person isn't worth/worthy of your time?

Isn't that how the menfolk of Fab have to see it too everytime they send the first message?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try to send Emily36c loads but they always get rejected

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By *ed wineMan
over a year ago

Where the streets have no name

I always welcome new friends here but I rarely send first messages for that reason. Being a woman or couple, incoming messages must be overwhelming.

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By *o30Woman
over a year ago

Lincoln

"I keep reading about women getting hundreds of messages daily, well i can truly say that this isnt the case for me, n even when I do get the odd message, including if im not interested i do reply i forgot to mention that when i first joined i did get a fair few but still not loads"

If I remember correctly when I first joined 8years ago, I got a total of 3 messages.

But it could depend on where you live.

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By *toC Thats MeWoman
over a year ago

Sheffield

I remember when I first joined, no pics or filters in place you literally do get hundreds. Now thankfully it’s calmed down a lot. I like to keep a relatively clear inbox…x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i can only imagine how much of a pain in the ass it would be, to get 100's of messages but thankfully we don't get many.

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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago

Bedford (or anywhere beginning with B..!?)

"I try to send Emily36c loads but they always get rejected "

I know ...to tell me I'm banished into the depths of jaffa cake hell

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did especially when I first joined. I had no filters on and I wasn't sure how fab worked. It can still get busy of I've posted a new pic or been on cams

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

just seen your pics....can see why

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 12/06/22 17:42:01]

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By *ady CurvaceousWoman
over a year ago

Kent

get about 100 a day, more at the weekend. I once got to page 1 of the hot photos section which meant I was visible to non site supporters (non site supporters only see page 1 which is why it's always the same people on it). On that day I got 950 messages. I have no idea how all those who are permanent page 1 residents deal with it. I try to reply to all of my messages unless they're disgusting or ridiculous, but sometimes I just can't.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I get a lot, but I post regular pics and that makes a big difference.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No one has control over the amount they receive but they do have the option of using the available filters to reduce those numbers if they don't have the time or energy to read them all.

... well from a female perspective you can fully control the amount of messages received ...restrict everyone and take the lead and message first ...too radical for some maybe

I've tried this a few times. It's too radical for me as I'd never approach the men I'm interested in. Too insecure!

I can appreciate that ...but what's the worst that can happen? ...a rude reply and then you know that person isn't worth/worthy of your time?

Isn't that how the menfolk of Fab have to see it too everytime they send the first message?

Yes, they do if they choose to approach strangers. They choose to do that. And I choose not to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve sent hundreds of messages without receiving a reply. You’ll get over it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’ve sent hundreds of messages without receiving a reply. You’ll get over it. "

Is that aimed at me? Why would I do that, sounds the definition of insanity.

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By *indergirlWoman
over a year ago

somewhere, someplace

When I was posting pics regularly and had no filters on then yes I got a lot of messages sometimes up to those numbers, filters on and less posting I get a lot less now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve had 84 today …. that’s a lot for a person who shows no bits

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By *eyond PurityCouple
over a year ago

Lincolnshire

I don’t think it matters how many messages you receive, it’s more how many are actually the ones you want to receive!

Whether it’s 1000 messages a day or 10…you’ll only have your interest piqued by about 5% of those…

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"I’ve had 84 today …. that’s a lot for a person who shows no bits

Are those outside of the forum?

I forgot to add that as a message provider.

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By *hoirCouple
over a year ago

Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds

"I keep reading about women getting hundreds of messages daily, well i can truly say that this isnt the case for me, n even when I do get the odd message, including if im not interested i do reply "

That's okay. I have never received a message for myself.

P gets all the attention (rightfully so).

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"I don’t think it matters how many messages you receive, it’s more how many are actually the ones you want to receive!

Whether it’s 1000 messages a day or 10…you’ll only have your interest piqued by about 5% of those…

--Yeah the simpler the profile (text-wise and sometimes even picture-wise), the more the amount of messages, and without-doubt the greater amount of unsuitable ones too!

I spent an age fiddling with my profile to stop unwanted messages. I preferred to do that rather than just filter. Of course some people won't look at the profile text at all, but most people will at least glance at it.

(it's a complete myth that ppl never read profiles - people are really losing out thinking that, as 5 messages referring to a profile always turn out to be much better than 50 purely-speculative ones that don't.) pt--

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

on a normal day 20 ++ per day when the meet sign goes up then its lots can be 100+ but then our filters are set to guys only

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"on a normal day 20 ++ per day when the meet sign goes up then its lots can be 100+ but then our filters are set to guys only"

i might add 99% of those are a complete waste of time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t think it matters how many messages you receive, it’s more how many are actually the ones you want to receive!

Whether it’s 1000 messages a day or 10…you’ll only have your interest piqued by about 5% of those…

--Yeah the simpler the profile (text-wise and sometimes even picture-wise), the more the amount of messages, and without-doubt the greater amount of unsuitable ones too!

I'd say at least half of the people who message me haven't read my profile. Why do you think it's a myth?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t think it matters how many messages you receive, it’s more how many are actually the ones you want to receive!

Whether it’s 1000 messages a day or 10…you’ll only have your interest piqued by about 5% of those…

--Yeah the simpler the profile (text-wise and sometimes even picture-wise), the more the amount of messages, and without-doubt the greater amount of unsuitable ones too!

I'd say at least half of the people who message me haven't read my profile. Why do you think it's a myth? "

id say 75 to 80% dont read our profiles and its so easy to tell ...

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"I'd say at least half of the people who message me haven't read my profile. Why do you think it's a myth? "

--I said "it's a myth that people never read profiles". You just said it's around 50/50 for you, which is actually good odds imo! (ie worth creating one for) --pt

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"id say 75 to 80% dont read our profiles and its so easy to tell ..."

--Even that is good odds imo --pt

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd say at least half of the people who message me haven't read my profile. Why do you think it's a myth?

--I said "it's a myth that people never read profiles". You just said it's around 50/50 for you, which is actually good odds imo! (ie worth creating one for) --pt"

I forgot to mention that the other half had read the profile but decided it didn't apply to them

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Or a good percentage I should say.

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By *BootyfulDayWoman
over a year ago

…

"I rarely get huge amounts of message's either x"

I’m similar though I imagine part of that is because my profile can be off putting, and apparently I’m nicer in real life than my profile, as I first start by saying I don’t want to meet

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By *anilla switchWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

I get an increase in messages when I put a new picture up, around 20.

I’m fairly sceptical about hundred plus.

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By *ak4uMan
over a year ago

chelmsford

But what sort of messages do you receive, are they the type you want, how many are relevant to your needs/wants?

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

"I don’t think it matters how many messages you receive, it’s more how many are actually the ones you want to receive!

Whether it’s 1000 messages a day or 10…you’ll only have your interest piqued by about 5% of those…

--Yeah the simpler the profile (text-wise and sometimes even picture-wise), the more the amount of messages, and without-doubt the greater amount of unsuitable ones too!

Of course not all men but you would agree I'm really clear about the 5 miles thing on my profile. Yet I get messages from all over the country.

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By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"I don’t think it matters how many messages you receive, it’s more how many are actually the ones you want to receive!

Whether it’s 1000 messages a day or 10…you’ll only have your interest piqued by about 5% of those…

--Yeah the simpler the profile (text-wise and sometimes even picture-wise), the more the amount of messages, and without-doubt the greater amount of unsuitable ones too!

Of course not all men but you would agree I'm really clear about the 5 miles thing on my profile. Yet I get messages from all over the country."

---It couldn't be clearer and you'd at least expect them to refer to it, but I guess when they don't read they don't read. --pt

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