FabSwingers.com forum: I want to be a bloke because.......

By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

No Granny...

The also scratch their balls.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I've been looking at pics..........

Not ONE of them has done their eyes, their lippy or put their hair up.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"No Granny...

The also scratch their balls."

Damn you are right !

Hope it's before they have a wash.

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By *uiteCurlyMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

You aren’t looking at Goths then

You assume they wash which is interesting too.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Yeah , it was an assumption ......

Right ....... take washing off the list.

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Shit. All this time I thought I was a lady. Turns out I'm a bloke!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No Granny...

The also scratch their balls."
while farting down the stairs

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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

"No Granny...

The also scratch their balls.

Damn you are right !

Hope it's before they have a wash."

It's probably before and after

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reasons to stay single

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Shit. All this time I thought I was a lady. Turns out I'm a bloke!

A bloke with boobies........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes but we have to wait for morning wood to go down before we can do anything so we’re already delayed by 5-10 minutes.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

They don't have periods or get pregnant

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Yes but we have to wait for morning wood to go down before we can do anything so we’re already delayed by 5-10 minutes."

So ........that's time enough to put your curlers in ........

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

..women can do the same thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Granny, why have you not mentioned about creaming/ moisturising your body? Concerns me a little bit.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"They don't have periods or get pregnant"

Do you think it's deliberate ? I bet it's deliberate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yes but we have to wait for morning wood to go down before we can do anything so we’re already delayed by 5-10 minutes.

So ........that's time enough to put your curlers in ........ "

Curlers in my beard? You might be into something.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On a serious note- we have pockets.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just get up , spray on some lynx, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

FTFY

We are the naturally better looking sex TBF

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By *irtydevil666Man
over a year ago

bristol

"They don't have periods or get pregnant"

But do suffer from ManFlu...

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Granny, why have you not mentioned about creaming/ moisturising your body? Concerns me a little bit. "

Because when I talk about creaming, you look like you have a french stick up your vest.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"..women can do the same thing

Oh come on now. Women can't do anything that men do ........ surely ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Errrrr

Not

What about shaving

Plucking nose hair

And ear hair

Aftershave conditioner

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By *ickshawedCouple
over a year ago

Wolverhampton

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Shit. All this time I thought I was a lady. Turns out I'm a bloke!

A bloke with boobies........ "

All of the laziness with added fun bags. I reckon I'm on to a winner

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By *hoirCouple
over a year ago

Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds

We still moisturise and some of us have to tame our beards.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Errrrr

Not

What about shaving

Plucking nose hair

And ear hair

Aftershave conditioner

I did all that before I logged on .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Errrrr

Not

What about shaving

Plucking nose hair

And ear hair

Aftershave conditioner

Helicopter in the mirror every time you walk past.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Granny, why have you not mentioned about creaming/ moisturising your body? Concerns me a little bit.

Because when I talk about creaming, you look like you have a french stick up your vest. "

Umm.. ok

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By *hirleyMan
over a year ago

somewhere

Sometimes I just lay in bed and don't just get up at all...

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

Only men are trusted with the remote...(as evidenced by all the sky remote/ male parts pics)

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By *hirleyMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"Sometimes I just lay in bed and don't just get up at all..."

That's mostly when I'm poorly though

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Sometimes I just lay in bed and don't just get up at all...

That's mostly when I'm poorly though

Man flu ?

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I have been known to use the remote upside down .......so it's just as well that blokes are willing to take charge

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"They don't have periods or get pregnant

But do suffer from ManFlu...

Suffer ? Nah ....... everyone around them suffers.

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By *aul40nwMan
over a year ago

wirral

Id happily swap for the chance to have a pair of tits xx

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By *hirleyMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"Sometimes I just lay in bed and don't just get up at all...

That's mostly when I'm poorly though

Man flu ?"

Is a real thing! Testosterone is an immune suppressant. Honestly look it up.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Missed off wank

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By *hirleyMan
over a year ago

somewhere

"Id happily swap for the chance to have a pair of tits xx "

There's ways you can

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Missed off wank"

Damn ........ take off wash n put on wank.

Wash off , Wank on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Somebody should start I want to be a lass thread so I can contribute

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Excuse me Ms Crumpet, I do comb ma hair as well ya know

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

We are always on time because we don't need to go hunting for a bag to match our shoes 37 seconds before we are due to go out.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Excuse me Ms Crumpet, I do comb ma hair as well ya know

Ahhhhhh Ace........ You are an example to all.

Just the one hair innit ?

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"We are always on time because we don't need to go hunting for a bag to match our shoes 37 seconds before we are due to go out. "

You have Asda shoes ?

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Somebody should start I want to be a lass thread so I can contribute"

G'wan then ....... why do you want to be a lass ?

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By *ackformore100Man
over a year ago

Tin town

"I have been known to use the remote upside down .......so it's just as well that blokes are willing to take charge"

Is that when the remote is "broken" as the volume is going up when you're pressing the down button?

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Its fucking awesome isn’t it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

You can do exactly the same as a man and still be as charming x

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I have been known to use the remote upside down .......so it's just as well that blokes are willing to take charge

Is that when the remote is "broken" as the volume is going up when you're pressing the down button? "

THAT ! and the way it fast forwards when i'm trying to rewind.

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

"We are always on time because we don't need to go hunting for a bag to match our shoes 37 seconds before we are due to go out.

You have Asda shoes ?"

Asda shoes? I'm a tad hungover this morning.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

You can do exactly the same as a man and still be as charming x "

Charming ? There's a novelty.

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"We are always on time because we don't need to go hunting for a bag to match our shoes 37 seconds before we are due to go out.

You have Asda shoes ?

Asda shoes? I'm a tad hungover this morning. "

Yeah ...... it was a shit joke.

Asda carrier bag to match your beautiful shoes

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By *aptain VMan
over a year ago

Birstall, Leicester

"They don't have periods or get pregnant"

We get nose bleeds

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Its fucking awesome isn’t it

At last ! A realist.

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

"We are always on time because we don't need to go hunting for a bag to match our shoes 37 seconds before we are due to go out.

You have Asda shoes ?

Asda shoes? I'm a tad hungover this morning.

Yeah ...... it was a shit joke.

Asda carrier bag to match your beautiful shoes "

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

"Its fucking awesome isn’t it

At last ! A realist."

Some times I don’t even wash or brush my teeth, or put deodorant on.

As a bloke we can get away with being stinky as we can just make up some bollocks about having just been working on the car

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Excuse me Ms Crumpet, I do comb ma hair as well ya know

Ahhhhhh Ace........ You are an example to all.

Just the one hair innit ?"

You know me too well

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By *he love catsCouple
over a year ago

South Wales

They have a penis, I've got to strap one on.

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

Don't just don't. They make you take your socks off.

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By *uiteCurlyMan
over a year ago

Glastonbury

I don’t need curlers. I’d just lose them in my hair anyway.

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By *xtrafun4youMan
over a year ago

Dunstable

"No Granny...

The also scratch their balls."
lol

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Don't just don't. They make you take your socks off. "

At least once a month

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

You get to have a shed with bloke things in it. Old car parts, old computer parts, bits of wood etc because "I might need that".

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By *ranny-Crumpet OP Woman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"You get to have a shed with bloke things in it. Old car parts, old computer parts, bits of wood etc because "I might need that"."

I have one of those. It was my dads! I like the way it smells.... and the rusty stuff it holds

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ladies, I'd be more than happy to get up, have a wash, etc, and let YOU scratch my balls, so you can feel part of things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They just don't care

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

They have to have a long, humongous poop before leaving the house.

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

I want the Manopause not Menopause

Give me a leather jacket, sports cars and a 20 year old. over Freaking Womans Hormones...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll have you know, I have a very intricate skin care routine to retain the youthful glow in my otherwise dead eyes

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

Well got brush the teeth as well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it was that simple

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well got brush the teeth as well

Keep them in a jar by the bed.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

"I'll have you know, I have a very intricate skin care routine to retain the youthful glow in my otherwise dead eyes

Your eyes were alive yesterday

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just don't care"

About what..?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly when I get ready for nights out with guy mates they take longer than me

One of them also likes to put his top in the dryer before we leave to shrink it down and make his pecs pop more

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By *hoirCouple
over a year ago

Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

I want to be able to have a piss standing up without it going everywhere too

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By *agic.MMan
over a year ago

Orpington

"They just don't care"

We literally don't give a toss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

You make that sound easy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That’s right, we make no effort, because we don’t have to. The same applies to girls but with hair and make-up routines, you put more effort in. Not sure why, peer pressure maybe?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Apparently I'm a man then...

Pxx

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By *weetCruellaWoman
over a year ago

somewhere sweet and sour

Must be an oddity then lol... quite happily not wear make up... but when I don't, it scares people (think red hair and pale skin) lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

Errrrr

Not

What about shaving

Plucking nose hair

And ear hair

Aftershave conditioner

I did all that before I logged on ..... "

Tease

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

I want to be able to have a piss standing up without it going everywhere too

Get yourself a She-Wee.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

You forgot the shit, shower and shave, a core routine for many of Britain’s finest

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By *hoirCouple
over a year ago

Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

I want to be able to have a piss standing up without it going everywhere too

Get yourself a She-Wee."

Been told they leak

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"They just get up , have a wash, pull a t shirt over their head n stick their jeans on.....

job done .........

I want to be able to have a piss standing up without it going everywhere too

Get yourself a She-Wee.

Been told they leak

We'll just have ask someone who has used one.

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