FabSwingers.com forum: Most me want in bed..

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

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By *annaBeStrongMan
over a year ago

wokingham

I also want to be told I’m the biggest you’ve ever had

Specifically say “biggest I’ve ever had”

I’ll pretend you mean penis

You’ll know you meant knob head

Everyone’s happy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Theres a thread by a fella similar like this.

We most assume of the other.

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By *nSeeNMan
over a year ago

Z'ha'dum

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives. "

If that's what you want then that's what you want.

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives. "

Not fussed on 2 and can there be food during?

Thanks, x

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives. "

You been nosing my profile again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives. "

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

Not fussed on 2 and can there be food during?

Thanks, x"

I’m not fussed on 2 either and I can make a good sandwich

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Typo on what women want op?

Sign me up!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

If that's what you want then that's what you want."

In my haste I fucked up the title

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By *nSeeNMan
over a year ago

Z'ha'dum

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

If that's what you want then that's what you want.

In my haste I fucked up the title

Freudian slip maybe

I'm not fussed about 1,2 and 3 but 4 is a definite deal breaker, I mean who doesn't expect to be fed after a hard day's work

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

Not fussed on 2 and can there be food during?

Thanks, x

I’m not fussed on 2 either and I can make a good sandwich

Ham salad? A little mustard?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wrong on all counts

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By *acktar74Man
over a year ago

leeds

I'd settle for 1 and 3

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By *otsMan
over a year ago

Higham

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

Not fussed on 2 and can there be food during?

Thanks, x

I’m not fussed on 2 either and I can make a good sandwich

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives. "
location location location

Bj in the doorway

Doggy only in front of a mirror i want you to watch me fuck

Talk all you want i will be

I dont eat efter sex i just have more sex

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By *agic.MMan
over a year ago

Orpington

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

If that's what you want then that's what you want.

In my haste I fucked up the title

Oh ...I thought this was about you, when you said "me"

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

You forgot anal.

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By *iberius61Man
over a year ago

Pontefract

I'm actually not that bothered about 1, don't dislike it, just not all that bothered.

2 is a definite yes, or maybe YES, or perhaps HELL YES!!!

3 no, I quite like talking. One of my favourites is that moment when you wiminz stop talking and start 'concentrating', you know the moment, kinda REALLY concentrating

4 no, I'm happy to provide food, on top of what I just ate...

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

"You forgot anal."

I must be less of a man

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives. "

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

I actually like a bit of talking and encourage it.

Can't say I ever expect food after sex.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

How strange, that's my favourite too maybe the side one also, can't think what it's called

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By *ang bang bangity bangCouple
over a year ago

Sunderland

All wrong.

Men want a pillow fort and snacks

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

How strange, that's my favourite too maybe the side one also, can't think what it's called

Prone bone? The side one, spooning?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

It's called the flatiron position

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

"It's called the flatiron position "

A quick Google and it's same as the prone bone or lazy doggy apparently.

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

How strange, that's my favourite too maybe the side one also, can't think what it's called

Spoons I believe

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By *unner6969Man
over a year ago

Bucks/London/Oxford

This surprised me, I’ve always felt that sex positions and acts naturally evolve from initial lust, through arousal to ultimate pleasure

"1) a blow job "
always welcome but not an expectation

"2) doggy style"
Not my favourite position, I like to see your face - but if it is a preferred position for a partner, then of course! Nothing bad about it but not a ‘must do’.

"3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had. "
Really? No talking? Chat and laughter are pretty essential in my book - and never be afraid to tell me what you like, want, or dislike; faster, slower, softer, harder, etc.

"4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!! "
I’ve never demanded food, though I may have suggested ordering a pizza afterwards - but it would have been me that paid.

"Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives. "
So, men generally need to be less prescriptive about their sexual expectations. I should probably insist I am returned home fed and watered

. I won’t be doing that, don’t worry!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do my ironing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1 and 2 I can do

3 sorry but there will be talking I turn in to a potty mouth and say some stuff I wouldn’t repeat out off it

4 sorry but can’t provide food for them just want them to zip up and leave afterwards so I can get on to the next

ha ha

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"It's called the flatiron position "

I goggled and that's the position I was talking about when I said her laying flat

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By *agerMorganMan
over a year ago

Canvey Island

All I want is a couple of crumpets and some tea.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"You forgot anal.

I must be less of a man

Yea, only real men fuck ass!

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"You forgot anal.

I must be less of a man

Yea, only real men fuck ass!"

Sometimes we aren't allowed to be real men

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This explains why no man wants to be in my bed.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"You forgot anal.

I must be less of a man

Yea, only real men fuck ass!

Sometimes we aren't allowed to be real men

Someone might say grow some balls

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

I do provide tea, but I'm not cooking dinner.

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

"This explains why no man wants to be in my bed. "

No sucking, no doggy, constant chat and no crumpets?

I'm sure you have nice clean sheets though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Especially love it when they make reference to my race. Don’t forget that one.

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"You forgot anal.

I must be less of a man

Yea, only real men fuck ass!

Sometimes we aren't allowed to be real men

Someone might say grow some balls

I think one pair is enough

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By *r TriomanMan
over a year ago

Chippenham Malmesbury area

I've never been offered food before, the most I've ever been offered is coffee

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By *ellhungvweMan
over a year ago

Cheltenham

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

Not fussed on 2 and can there be food during?

Thanks, x

I’m not fussed on 2 either and I can make a good sandwich

You are a keeper then

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

"I've never been offered food before, the most I've ever been offered is coffee"

No half time pizza?

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"You forgot anal.

I must be less of a man

Yea, only real men fuck ass!

Sometimes we aren't allowed to be real men

Someone might say grow some balls

I think one pair is enough

I dunno, one pair in the hands, one in the face

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

2 and 4 are winners

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This explains why no man wants to be in my bed.

No sucking, no doggy, constant chat and no crumpets?

I'm sure you have nice clean sheets though"

It's a no for all of those.

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"You forgot anal.

I must be less of a man

Yea, only real men fuck ass!

Sometimes we aren't allowed to be real men

Someone might say grow some balls

I think one pair is enough

I dunno, one pair in the hands, one in the face

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By *nSeeNMan
over a year ago

Z'ha'dum

"I do provide tea, but I'm not cooking dinner."

Any cake with that tea?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Especially love it when they make reference to my race. Don’t forget that one. "
did you win it?

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By *ustamanMan
over a year ago

weymouth

Nope non of those required but I do love extended play so if that could be added

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

I actually like a bit of talking and encourage it.

Can't say I ever expect food after sex. "

You’re easily pleased!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just want a kiss

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"I just want a kiss

You’re even easier

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I just want a kiss

You’re even easier

Calm down! Nobody said I was easy

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"I just want a kiss

You’re even easier

He's a easy rider

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"I just want a kiss

You’re even easier

Calm down! Nobody said I was easy

That's definitely not true

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

I actually like a bit of talking and encourage it.

Can't say I ever expect food after sex.

You’re easily pleased! "

That's definitely not true, I challenge you to easily please me

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

I actually like a bit of talking and encourage it.

Can't say I ever expect food after sex.

You’re easily pleased!

That's definitely not true, I challenge you to easily please me

Ding dong

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

Nope I would like you to say how I can make you orgasm if it ain’t happening

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"I do provide tea, but I'm not cooking dinner.

Any cake with that tea? "

I'll even make it myself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Especially love it when they make reference to my race. Don’t forget that one. did you win it? "

in the words of nines- ‘guaranteed she coming first like bolt at the olympics’

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick

1) BJs are overrated, give me a wank instead.

2) I prefer missionary (for the better body and eye contact), but if we are doing a position from behind, prone one is sooo much better.

3) No, I've been known to crack jokes. Sex is meant to be fun, not taken too seriously.

4) Food is good, but I'd never expect it (or been offered it) from anyone.

What I expect is for both of us to be into it, and put some effort in.

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

I actually like a bit of talking and encourage it.

Can't say I ever expect food after sex. "

That's pretty much what I just typed too!

Yeah, Pronebobe. When she lays on her belly, legs together and you sit astride her and enter her between the upper thighs.

I've met a surprising amount of women who have never tried it, and are always amazed by how good it feels.

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick

Pronebobe? FFS!

Pronebone

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

I actually like a bit of talking and encourage it.

Can't say I ever expect food after sex.

That's pretty much what I just typed too!

Yeah, Pronebobe. When she lays on her belly, legs together and you sit astride her and enter her between the upper thighs.

I've met a surprising amount of women who have never tried it, and are always amazed by how good it feels. "

It's definitely a winning position

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"1) BJs are overrated, give me a wank instead.

I tried Google translate on this and it came up with the same thing… so still don’t know what this said….

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

No chance of them getting any food.

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

What about a 50 inch flatscreen tv with sky sports for the football.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You missed a minimum of 4 beers brought to us during the match but other than that it’s pretty spot on.

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By *heRazorsEdgeMan
over a year ago

Wales/ All over UK

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives. "

Can I have the food first please?…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

I actually like a bit of talking and encourage it.

Can't say I ever expect food after sex.

That's pretty much what I just typed too!

Yeah, Pronebobe. When she lays on her belly, legs together and you sit astride her and enter her between the upper thighs.

I've met a surprising amount of women who have never tried it, and are always amazed by how good it feels.

It's definitely a winning position "

Meh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Especially love it when they make reference to my race. Don’t forget that one. did you win it?

in the words of nines- ‘guaranteed she coming first like bolt at the olympics’

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

I actually like a bit of talking and encourage it.

Can't say I ever expect food after sex.

That's pretty much what I just typed too!

Yeah, Pronebobe. When she lays on her belly, legs together and you sit astride her and enter her between the upper thighs.

I've met a surprising amount of women who have never tried it, and are always amazed by how good it feels.

It's definitely a winning position

Meh"

Shhh, just watch the movie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

I actually like a bit of talking and encourage it.

Can't say I ever expect food after sex.

That's pretty much what I just typed too!

Yeah, Pronebobe. When she lays on her belly, legs together and you sit astride her and enter her between the upper thighs.

I've met a surprising amount of women who have never tried it, and are always amazed by how good it feels.

It's definitely a winning position

Meh

Shhh, just watch the movie

Movie? Oh......that movie!

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By *uke olovingmanMan
over a year ago

Gravesend

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives. "

Blow job...please...I love giving oral too

Doggy ..or whatever takes your fancy

Chat away ..I love conversation

And we can go for a meal ..either before or afterwards

A slurp of booze is always nice

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By *uietly_KinkyMan
over a year ago

High Wycombe

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives. "

I'm either entirely unfussed about or actively don't want all of those.

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

"1) a blow job

2) doggy style

3) no talking unless you tell them they're the best you've ever had.

4) plus they want you to provide god damn food afterwards!!

Now I have bestowed upon you my wisdom you may carry on with your lives.

I'm happy to not have number 1

Number 2 is good but I prefer her to lay flat on stomach as that's my favourite position

I actually like a bit of talking and encourage it.

Can't say I ever expect food after sex.

That's pretty much what I just typed too!

Yeah, Pronebobe. When she lays on her belly, legs together and you sit astride her and enter her between the upper thighs.

I've met a surprising amount of women who have never tried it, and are always amazed by how good it feels.

It's definitely a winning position

Meh

Shhh, just watch the movie

Movie? Oh......that movie!

Yeah that one

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