FabSwingers.com forum: I'm having a terrible fucking evening

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Regale me, please? Funny stories, animal videos, general fuckery...

Or just tell me what kind of wine I should drown myself in

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

Blue nun.

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By *awpleasureMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

LiVARpool are losing. That should cheer you up

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By *mp411Man
over a year ago

chester

Tequila nut to wine

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

Bread & Butter Chardonnay Is absolutely divine.

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By *inballs99Man
over a year ago

Blackheath

I was gonna say if its so bad avoid the wine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you’re beautiful.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Blue nun. "

Orange vicar?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"LiVARpool are losing. That should cheer you up

I don't care about football, but I'm glad other people are also miserable tonight

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Tequila nut to wine

Tequila Rose might be a good shout actually

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bread & Butter Chardonnay Is absolutely divine. "

Oooooh what dis???

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I was gonna say if its so bad avoid the wine"

Get out.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think you’re beautiful.

I don't deserve your love

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By *awpleasureMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

Sister Mary used to tell me some very rude and vulgar jokes.

She was definitely a blue nun....

I'm here all week unfortunately

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

"Bread & Butter Chardonnay Is absolutely divine.

Oooooh what dis??? "

It’s like the taste of pudding but in wine form.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm miserable and I also have wine.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure why you're having a terrible evening. But if its at the hands of someone else, please just slap them if they're old enough to know better of course.

Or find something you like doing doing and fuck everything else off.

Or hide.

that's what I'd do.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bread & Butter Chardonnay Is absolutely divine.

Oooooh what dis???

It’s like the taste of pudding but in wine form. "

Oh my god

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm miserable and I also have wine. "

I like your style

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Not sure why you're having a terrible evening. But if its at the hands of someone else, please just slap them if they're old enough to know better of course.

Or find something you like doing doing and fuck everything else off.

Or hide.

that's what I'd do.

PW "

Ugh it's just everything. You know?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My missus has just left me, said I was into horse racing more than her.

She’s out the door, at the gate, annnnnnd she’s off

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

"Bread & Butter Chardonnay Is absolutely divine.

Oooooh what dis???

It’s like the taste of pudding but in wine form.

Oh my god "

Yassssssss.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"My missus has just left me, said I was into horse racing more than her.

She’s out the door, at the gate, annnnnnd she’s off

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can send you a video of my cat of you like.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bread & Butter Chardonnay Is absolutely divine.

Oooooh what dis???

It’s like the taste of pudding but in wine form.

Oh my god

Yassssssss. "

Where???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sending hugs OP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not sure why you're having a terrible evening. But if its at the hands of someone else, please just slap them if they're old enough to know better of course.

Or find something you like doing doing and fuck everything else off.

Or hide.

that's what I'd do.

Ugh it's just everything. You know? "

Hope it's not one of those ones where everything you touch breaks or spills etc and every message is an eye rolling one and there's nothing on TV worth watching.

They are pants!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Bread & Butter Chardonnay Is absolutely divine.

Oooooh what dis???

It’s like the taste of pudding but in wine form.

Oh my god

Yassssssss.

Where??? "

Wouod drop you a friendly Welsh message, from one Heathrow resident to another, your age range stops me pestering you though

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"sending hugs OP."

Thank you!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sister Mary used to tell me some very rude and vulgar jokes.

She was definitely a blue nun....

I'm here all week unfortunately

Funny af

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Not sure why you're having a terrible evening. But if its at the hands of someone else, please just slap them if they're old enough to know better of course.

Or find something you like doing doing and fuck everything else off.

Or hide.

that's what I'd do.

Ugh it's just everything. You know?

Hope it's not one of those ones where everything you touch breaks or spills etc and every message is an eye rolling one and there's nothing on TV worth watching.

They are pants!

PW "

It's an existential crisisey type one

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By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

I've got chocolate buttons

they always cheer me up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Not sure why you're having a terrible evening. But if its at the hands of someone else, please just slap them if they're old enough to know better of course.

Or find something you like doing doing and fuck everything else off.

Or hide.

that's what I'd do.

Ugh it's just everything. You know?

Hope it's not one of those ones where everything you touch breaks or spills etc and every message is an eye rolling one and there's nothing on TV worth watching.

They are pants!

It's an existential crisisey type one"

It will pass, they always do x

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

"Bread & Butter Chardonnay Is absolutely divine.

Oooooh what dis???

It’s like the taste of pudding but in wine form.

Oh my god

Yassssssss.

Where??? "

Can get it from Majestic Wine stores.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Regale me, please? Funny stories, animal videos, general fuckery...

Or just tell me what kind of wine I should drown myself in

Why is it bad?

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By *tarflyLouWoman
over a year ago

Preston

Sad to hear this

Sending love xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I can send you a video of my cat of you like. "

Does it purr when stroked ...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, i know your pain and feel the same, no alcohol for me would just make it all worse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've got chocolate buttons

they always cheer me up "

Giant ones are great

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By *eliusMan
over a year ago

Henlow

"LiVARpool are losing. That should cheer you up

It’s cheered me up

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I can send you a video of my cat of you like. "

Oh my god always

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

https://youtu.be/y8rjdedEXkY

Always cheers me up. X

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I've got chocolate buttons

they always cheer me up "

Really? How do they hold your clothes together?

(ba-dum tshh)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shall I send you some of our wedding photos on telegram.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bread & Butter Chardonnay Is absolutely divine.

Oooooh what dis???

It’s like the taste of pudding but in wine form.

Oh my god

Yassssssss.

Where???

Can get it from Majestic Wine stores. "

Ohh so not for tonight then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm miserable and I also have wine. "

With an arse like that?

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By *yrdsisWoman
over a year ago

Gleam Street

Dad joke I was told yesterday if it helps....

Who can drink a litre of petrol?

Jerry can

Not my dad joke!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Regale me, please? Funny stories, animal videos, general fuckery...

Or just tell me what kind of wine I should drown myself in

Why is it bad? "

Honestly I don't want to be one of those "things are shit, don't wanna talk about it" type people but if I go into it we'll be here all night...

Just an amalgamation of things that by themselves wouldn't have been a huge deal but feeling all these things at the same time is getting pretty hard.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sad to hear this

Sending love xx"
.

Thanks Lou xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Yes, i know your pain and feel the same, no alcohol for me would just make it all worse. "

Tbh I don't know if I can even be bothered to get out of bed and go buy some

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By *torm in a G cupWoman
over a year ago

Land of the Long White Cloud

Sod the wine. Hit the hard stuff. I'd love to, but it is only 9.35am here

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"https://youtu.be/y8rjdedEXkY

Always cheers me up. X"

This is actually making me laugh, thank you!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Shall I send you some of our wedding photos on telegram.

Yes yes yes please!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dad joke I was told yesterday if it helps....

Who can drink a litre of petrol?

Jerry can

Not my dad joke!

It's a great dad joke nonetheless

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sod the wine. Hit the hard stuff. I'd love to, but it is only 9.35am here

Yes you're right.

I'm getting Krispy Kreme

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

"Sister Mary used to tell me some very rude and vulgar jokes.

She was definitely a blue nun....

I'm here all week unfortunately

Lucky you the sisters just beat us

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Rum is the way to go

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By *yrdsisWoman
over a year ago

Gleam Street

"Dad joke I was told yesterday if it helps....

Who can drink a litre of petrol?

Jerry can

Not my dad joke!

It's a great dad joke nonetheless

I shall let him know... he literally walked into our office, said that and walked out... my teamie was confused..

"Did he JUST come in here to tell you a das joke?'

Yep

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Shall I send you some of our wedding photos on telegram.

Yes yes yes please!! "

Sent. X

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By *nliveneTV/TS
over a year ago

Selby

Desperados and desperados

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Sorry - logged off for a couple of hours.

I thought you had a shag on the cards tonight?

Did that go tits up?

Commiserations if it did. Just have a massive lady wank instead and a relaxing soak in the bath with wine.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Rum is the way to go

Mmmm I feel like I'll have a half empty bottle of rum hanging about for ages though

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dad joke I was told yesterday if it helps....

Who can drink a litre of petrol?

Jerry can

Not my dad joke!

It's a great dad joke nonetheless

I shall let him know... he literally walked into our office, said that and walked out... my teamie was confused..

"Did he JUST come in here to tell you a das joke?'

Yep

Amazing

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Desperados and desperados

Don't like beer

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sorry - logged off for a couple of hours.

I thought you had a shag on the cards tonight?

Did that go tits up?

Commiserations if it did. Just have a massive lady wank instead and a relaxing soak in the bath with wine.

Yeah he turned out to be a wanker

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

Have a Mega Pint of Pinot Noir.

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By *yourselfMan
over a year ago

Heworth

Asda extra special Gavi £8 a bottle, dry white.

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

"Rum is the way to go

Mmmm I feel like I'll have a half empty bottle of rum hanging about for ages though

You can ways make rum balls or trife with the rest, it's not like it goes off it lasts for ever.

Put it in cake, coffee.

Rum and rasin ice cream

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

"Sorry - logged off for a couple of hours.

I thought you had a shag on the cards tonight?

Did that go tits up?

Commiserations if it did. Just have a massive lady wank instead and a relaxing soak in the bath with wine.

Yeah he turned out to be a wanker

Bugger.

Better luck next time.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hit the wine, I did. Few glasses of red has gone down very nicely

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Have a Mega Pint of Pinot Noir."

Omg please tell me you've ever seen Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt??

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Asda extra special Gavi £8 a bottle, dry white. "

My local Asda is shut now

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Rum is the way to go

Mmmm I feel like I'll have a half empty bottle of rum hanging about for ages though

You can ways make rum balls or trife with the rest, it's not like it goes off it lasts for ever.

Put it in cake, coffee.

Rum and rasin ice cream

Omg please this is all far too much effort

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By *orksRockerMan
over a year ago

Bradford

This always cheers me up...

https://youtu.be/B94q7gUu75k

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

"Rum is the way to go

Mmmm I feel like I'll have a half empty bottle of rum hanging about for ages though

You can ways make rum balls or trife with the rest, it's not like it goes off it lasts for ever.

Put it in cake, coffee.

Rum and rasin ice cream

Omg please this is all far too much effort

"
x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hit the wine, I did. Few glasses of red has gone down very nicely

I'm starting to feel like it's too late? I have to be up around 9ish and I need to go get wine still

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By *yourselfMan
over a year ago

Heworth

"Asda extra special Gavi £8 a bottle, dry white.

My local Asda is shut now

Balls. It'll be open at 10am though

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"This always cheers me up...

https://youtu.be/B94q7gUu75k"

Love this show!! Bob Mortimer on WILTY will always be my fave though, he's incredible

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry to hear that. Hope the earlier thread wasn't a contributing factor.

Joke for you

“I am writing a film script about going back in time to stop Hitler’s parents meeting at the Austrian Enchantment ‘Under The Sea’ dance. It’s called ‘Back to the Fuhrer’!”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hit the wine, I did. Few glasses of red has gone down very nicely

I'm starting to feel like it's too late? I have to be up around 9ish and I need to go get wine still"

You need to start ordering online. Aldi is a good option. Meantime, ice cream is a good alternative or listen to some meditation music x

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By *agneto.Man
over a year ago

Bham

"Blue nun.

Orange vicar? "

Only if he's been on the sunbeds.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Sorry to hear that. Hope the earlier thread wasn't a contributing factor.

Joke for you

“I am writing a film script about going back in time to stop Hitler’s parents meeting at the Austrian Enchantment ‘Under The Sea’ dance. It’s called ‘Back to the Fuhrer’!”"

It wasn't, my life is enough of a mess to depress me outside of the forums!

That joke did get a chuckle ngl

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By *hris99Man
over a year ago

Liverpool

Sweet Jesus you’re tremendous :p and any wine is fine when it’s called for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nice bum can I stick a straw inside and make chocolate milkshake?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hit the wine, I did. Few glasses of red has gone down very nicely

I'm starting to feel like it's too late? I have to be up around 9ish and I need to go get wine still

You need to start ordering online. Aldi is a good option. Meantime, ice cream is a good alternative or listen to some meditation music x"

I was thinking of ordering pizza but I've already eaten so much shit today I'm just gonna regret it and make things worse. Honestly I'll just procrastinate for a bit then go to bed probably

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"LiVARpool are losing. That should cheer you up

Not very kind or patriotic....all things considered...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP, I got you, homie

https://youtu.be/nZvMdMjAQSk

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"OP, I got you, homie

https://youtu.be/nZvMdMjAQSk"

NO! DEVIL! SHOO!!!

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By *orksRockerMan
over a year ago

Bradford

"This always cheers me up...

https://youtu.be/B94q7gUu75k

Love this show!! Bob Mortimer on WILTY will always be my fave though, he's incredible"

The egg in a bath by Chris Rea was a beauty.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hit the wine, I did. Few glasses of red has gone down very nicely

I'm starting to feel like it's too late? I have to be up around 9ish and I need to go get wine still

You need to start ordering online. Aldi is a good option. Meantime, ice cream is a good alternative or listen to some meditation music x

I was thinking of ordering pizza but I've already eaten so much shit today I'm just gonna regret it and make things worse. Honestly I'll just procrastinate for a bit then go to bed probably "

Hope you sleep well. Night x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you should try pat your bum hole and rub your fanny at the same time

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hit the wine, I did. Few glasses of red has gone down very nicely

I'm starting to feel like it's too late? I have to be up around 9ish and I need to go get wine still

You need to start ordering online. Aldi is a good option. Meantime, ice cream is a good alternative or listen to some meditation music x

I was thinking of ordering pizza but I've already eaten so much shit today I'm just gonna regret it and make things worse. Honestly I'll just procrastinate for a bit then go to bed probably

Hope you sleep well. Night x"

Thank you xx

I'm actually having wine with a friend tomorrow anyway

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think you should try pat your bum hole and rub your fanny at the same time "

Even better if I had someone else do it for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a great evening! Life ebbs and flows. Is it fate or luck? Who knows, but tomorrow is another day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hit the wine, I did. Few glasses of red has gone down very nicely

I'm starting to feel like it's too late? I have to be up around 9ish and I need to go get wine still

You need to start ordering online. Aldi is a good option. Meantime, ice cream is a good alternative or listen to some meditation music x

I was thinking of ordering pizza but I've already eaten so much shit today I'm just gonna regret it and make things worse. Honestly I'll just procrastinate for a bit then go to bed probably

Hope you sleep well. Night x

Thank you xx

I'm actually having wine with a friend tomorrow anyway

Even better x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Regale me, please? Funny stories, animal videos, general fuckery...

Or just tell me what kind of wine I should drown myself in

Nope

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By *penbicoupleCouple
over a year ago

Northampton

"Omg please tell me you've ever seen Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt?? "

We're fans of the lead actress.

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By *hoirCouple
over a year ago

Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds

"Bread & Butter Chardonnay Is absolutely divine.

Oooooh what dis???

It’s like the taste of pudding but in wine form. "

I may have to try this as Chardonnay is supposed to be buttery.

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By *nliveneTV/TS
over a year ago

Selby

"Desperados and desperados

Don't like beer

Piñacolada

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t talk about alcohol please. Not at this time of the morning.

*pours coffee.

Op. Hope your day today feels better than last night!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry to hear that. Hope the earlier thread wasn't a contributing factor.

Joke for you

“I am writing a film script about going back in time to stop Hitler’s parents meeting at the Austrian Enchantment ‘Under The Sea’ dance. It’s called ‘Back to the Fuhrer’!”

It wasn't, my life is enough of a mess to depress me outside of the forums!

That joke did get a chuckle ngl

Oh good

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By *awpleasureMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

"LiVARpool are losing. That should cheer you up

Not very kind or patriotic....all things considered...

How do you know that I'm English??

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By *awpleasureMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

"LiVARpool are losing. That should cheer you up

Not very kind or patriotic....all things considered...

Also the Liverpool fans booed national anthem at FA cup final.

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By *hoirCouple
over a year ago

Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds

"LiVARpool are losing. That should cheer you up

Not very kind or patriotic....all things considered...

Also the Liverpool fans booed national anthem at FA cup final. "

A fair selection of the city think Liverpoo is a country itself.

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