FabSwingers.com forum: I lost all my passion.

By *esire in Sheffield OP Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

Hi all.

I seriously want to ask you all. And I kindly ask you to be respectful.

All my life long I had high sex drive but my ex killed all my passion towards women I loved her very much but I felt myself like a toyboy with her now I do not want to have sex with anybody anymore.

I am going to clubs dance but I don’t want to continue more. To everybody I’m saying that’s all.

This started to disturb me.

Do you have any advise ?

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

Try another woman. see if you still feel a like toyboy.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Maybe you just need some time

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By *piderBunnyCouple
over a year ago

Back of Nowhere and Beyond

Sorry OP, haven't got any advice. But I hope you come through it and find your joy.

Posh

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

Perhaps look into talking therapy if you’d like to explore how you’re feeling - otherwise as Lacey says, time is a great healer and life is full of wonderful things to do that have nothing to do with sexy mojo. Be kind to yourself.

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman
over a year ago

North West

"Hi all.

I seriously want to ask you all. And I kindly ask you to be respectful.

All my life long I had high sex drive but my ex killed all my passion towards women I loved her very much but I felt myself like a toyboy with her now I do not want to have sex with anybody anymore.

I am going to clubs dance but I don’t want to continue more. To everybody I’m saying that’s all.

This started to disturb me.

Do you have any advise ? "

I'd talk it through with someone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It takes time to get over someone you loved. If you ever do.

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By *esire in Sheffield OP Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Try another woman. see if you still feel a like toyboy.

The problem is I don’t want to try anymore. But thank you for advise. There is no any other way I have to try. It’s like having an accident and being afraid of driving again. Was a good driver tho.

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By *esire in Sheffield OP Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Maybe you just need some time "

Yes I thought the same but it’s almost a year I feel same. Do you think I should wait some more ??

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By *esire in Sheffield OP Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

"It takes time to get over someone you loved. If you ever do."

It was love for me and I had this dream that she loved me too. She still says she loves me but I don’t believe. She didn’t cheat on me but her attraction towards me was always physical this made me feel really down. Probably you are right I need some more time. Because I don’t want to have sex without any feeling anymore.

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By *esire in Sheffield OP Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Sorry OP, haven't got any advice. But I hope you come through it and find your joy.

Posh

Thank you. I wish you two happiness

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By *esire in Sheffield OP Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Hi all.

I seriously want to ask you all. And I kindly ask you to be respectful.

All my life long I had high sex drive but my ex killed all my passion towards women I loved her very much but I felt myself like a toyboy with her now I do not want to have sex with anybody anymore.

I am going to clubs dance but I don’t want to continue more. To everybody I’m saying that’s all.

This started to disturb me.

Do you have any advise ?

I'd talk it through with someone. "

Yeah I thought so and I think can not find better advise than here

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

I'm the same.

To me it comes down to priorities and right now my priority is me.

I don't wanna open myself up to being vulnerable. I don't think there's any shame in that, I think contextually, it's self care.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

Are you passionate in other areas?

Work maybe, hobbies?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know that feeling i dont have the spark desire or hunger i once did now i spend my life wishing away minutes and wasting time

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By *esire in Sheffield OP Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Are you passionate in other areas?

Work maybe, hobbies? "

Yes I was always passionate about my work and always had hobbies.

Now im so much focus to my work and self development.

Checked your profile you are right we look like very similar.

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By *esire in Sheffield OP Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

"I know that feeling i dont have the spark desire or hunger i once did now i spend my life wishing away minutes and wasting time "

Do you think it’s because We had more than enough or was not treated well enough or maybe both

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

"Try another woman. see if you still feel a like toyboy.

Bus pass time then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I know that feeling i dont have the spark desire or hunger i once did now i spend my life wishing away minutes and wasting time

Do you think it’s because We had more than enough or was not treated well enough or maybe both "
no its because i dont abandon who i care for im not willing to let anyone in enough to be that available if i did id feel i was watering down what i had I have to remain steady and balanced incase im needed its a hard life but its honourable but il still have fun just not the same energy i had

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By *esire in Sheffield OP Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

"Try another woman. see if you still feel a like toyboy.

Bus pass time then?

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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago

yumsville

"Try another woman. see if you still feel a like toyboy.

Bus pass time then?

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By *eisty LadyWoman
over a year ago

Count Your Blessings Cottage, Gratitude Grove

I’ve been in the same boat, most people have

Time is a good healer and hopefully the right person will come along soon for you

Until then enjoy yourself as best you can and talk to someone about it if you need to

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By *esire in Sheffield OP Man
over a year ago

Sheffield

"I’ve been in the same boat, most people have

Time is a good healer and hopefully the right person will come along soon for you

Until then enjoy yourself as best you can and talk to someone about it if you need to "

Thank you

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By *heDesiCandiTV/TS
over a year ago

Leicester

Hi OP - have found pushing my body to get into fight or flight mode has helped me reset me. Little things like trekking and climbing a mountain - when you are in unfamiliar tough climes, outside of the world you call home (your safety blanket), it resets your mind and hormones.

Ps thou should be valued during intimacy with someone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi hope this helps I loved someone so much but totally got let down so what I done worked more then one day my brother became ill and passed away and it was something he told me we not around for long

Then so i come back on fabs all my old friends come back chatting next thing was never big in clubs love it now and my sex life back and my light come on again I would never go somewhere on my own off to a lovely spa where u walk round in your brithday outfit lol I would say to you try meet new people you be Surprised how many nice lovely people out there take care jenny X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you don't want to try, then don't. You can not force yourself to feel differently at the moment and that is not a bad thing.

You need the time to find yourself and to be happy, concentrate on something else and one day you will feel like you want to try again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I haven’t lost all my passion for love. I’ve lost my own personal interest for needing or wanting it. I gave my heart to someone who still has it, and there’s nothing I can do. So I think I can understand what some people are saying here.

But I do love watching it. I’m a stupid romantics that will tear up at films, will smile when the guy gets his girl etc.

I see it in the real world older people still holding hands and it gives me hope , that is what life is about feeling safe with someone. Without love we’d all just be in one big ‘meh”.

Op or anyone, protect yourself, protect your feeling and lock your heart up. But just maybe one day when you see how beautiful love can be, you might take it out again and play the game with someone else.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I haven’t lost all my passion for love. I’ve lost my own personal interest for needing or wanting it. I gave my heart to someone who still has it, and there’s nothing I can do. So I think I can understand what some people are saying here.

But I do love watching it. I’m a stupid romantics that will tear up at films, will smile when the guy gets his girl etc.

I see it in the real world older people still holding hands and it gives me hope , that is what life is about feeling safe with someone. Without love we’d all just be in one big ‘meh”.

This is too much emotion before 6am.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP, very sorry to read this and can but hope in time you’ll meet someone that’ll bring back that spark in your life. Be kind to yourself and others...

and take comfort in knowing that things don’t stay the same forever, good times will cum (is just a matter of time).

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

After I split up with my ex, the thought of sexual intimacy filled me with so much fear and I just couldn’t bring myself to the act of sex or anything like that.

It took me quite a while to even consider meeting someone sexually and when I did, it felt like a huge roadblock.

The random act of sex held little desire for me, the physical wasn’t an urge that I had at that time, I felt as though previous events and her actions had burnt that out of me.

Time heals all things, if you don’t want to do something, then don’t. It’s as simple as that.

Maybe speaking to a professional would be helpful though

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By *dible_KinkCouple
over a year ago

Aberdeen

I lost all my passion when I was in a loveless relationship and constantly depressed, but I decided life needed to be lived or it would pass me by altogether, so I lost weight, gained confidence and joined fab - it's safe to say I've well and truely got my moko back. You only have one life - every day we have left is precious and wasted if you don't actively seek out happiness and enjoyment. My situation is different from yours OP as you are yearning for past love, whilst I didnt have any to lose, but I can say with certainly, you can and will get your mojo back if you actively hunt it down. Good luck

Mr.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hi all.

I seriously want to ask you all. And I kindly ask you to be respectful.

All my life long I had high sex drive but my ex killed all my passion towards women I loved her very much but I felt myself like a toyboy with her now I do not want to have sex with anybody anymore.

I am going to clubs dance but I don’t want to continue more. To everybody I’m saying that’s all.

This started to disturb me.

Do you have any advise ? "

Why is it disturbing you? Because you had a high sex drive in the past and you miss it?

Maybe you need some time to recover and find yourself again. If you make a conscious decision to not have sex (no sex chat, anything) for say 6 months, that might take the pressure off.

Then see how you feel after the 6 months.

Hope you feel better.

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By *intsizedpocketrocketsCouple
over a year ago

Stafford

"Hi all.

I seriously want to ask you all. And I kindly ask you to be respectful.

All my life long I had high sex drive but my ex killed all my passion towards women I loved her very much but I felt myself like a toyboy with her now I do not want to have sex with anybody anymore.

I am going to clubs dance but I don’t want to continue more. To everybody I’m saying that’s all.

This started to disturb me.

Do you have any advise ? "

First off OP hi!

Secondly take a deep breath...

What has happened to you in the past is technically a trauma. It's a valid response and completely understandable. If it's something you notice spilling over into your everyday life then maybe speaking to your GP would be wise. However as others have said, talking therapy and giving it time is a brilliant idea. Helps you gain perspective on what's happened.

Your going to clubs and dancing though, so in time there may be someone who catches your eye and it's all good from there. Just don't rush it, and let things happen naturally.

It's not easy, but then nothing in life that's worth it is!

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