FabSwingers.com forum: colostomy bags

By *dinburghcouple123 OP Couple
over a year ago

edinburgh

We were wondering are there any other people on the site with colostomy/ iliostomy bags.. and how do people on the site percieve them. Are they welcome or not welcome in the swinging community s and t xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know it's all about live & let live but, honestly, if we were contacted by someone who said he/she wore a colostomy bag we'd very quickly a polite thanks, but no thanks response to them. I'm sure people with illnesses and ailments of all descriptions shouldn't be made to feel that they are not derserving of a healthy sex life but I think they need to keep it to themselves really.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I actually dont think this is a question up for DEBATE.

I peresntly care for some one who has this and regardless of swinging, its a totally embarrassing condition to those who have to have these.

And i can safely say that if having a colostomy bag etc, you wouldnt BE SWINGING.

1. you would be too poorly.

2, embarrassing to those suffering.

3. its NOT joke to be having at the expense of others.

thread closed by [deputy dawg)

or hopefully someone else. ????

and removed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This post actually offends me.

sorry

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This post actually offends me.

sorry

The ops i mean

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[thread closed] by deputy dawg

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple
over a year ago

Bolton

Agree with you totally peaches -

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

thank you xxxxxxxxx

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By *dinburghcouple123 OP Couple
over a year ago

edinburgh

i was wondering is it the question that offends or people with colostomys and iliosty tat offend if you look in the other forum chat and advice somebody has a completely different view who also was a nurse why should this be a taboo subject when we are looking to see how people see others with colostys/iliostomy, and what offense and hurt or sense of well being these comments are making to those people who do suffer from this condition ?? s nd t x

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Why on earth would someone take offense at someone asking a serious question. Ive never seen anyone taking offense at any other questions regarding illnesses. Peaches you can have a colostomy bag without being to ill to play, there are various reasons why people have colostomy bags.

Personally i dont think i would play with someone with a colostomy bag but i most certainly wouldnt take offense at them. What happened to humanity.

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By *dinburghcouple123 OP Couple
over a year ago

edinburgh

a bit of both i guess obviously lots of people have there own opinions on this subject wrong or right and yes i agree with some thing peaches says however a colostomy is not a painful thing yes maybe embarrasing to start with but does this mean we have to pidgeon hole these people because it is something physical that you can only see when undressed i mean is this the general concensus that any body with a special need or a disability should not be able to swing or even talk about it ?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

[Removed by poster at 08/11/09 14:55:02]

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

And i can safely say that if having a colostomy bag etc, you wouldnt BE SWINGING.

1. you would be too poorly.

2, embarrassing to those suffering.

3. its NOT joke to be having at the expense of others.

Speaking as someone with Crohn’s who came very close to needing (but thankfully avoided) a colostomy bag when I was in my mid 20’s… I can safely say I know a fair few folk with bags who are far from too poorly to enjoy recreational sex (not that any are folk I have sex with, but they do tell me about it) and not all are embarrassed (some have the attitude of “it’s your problem not mine”).

If someone with a bag wants to ask about what people’s opinions are…. hey why not? I would however point out to anyone asking the question that you will only likely get replies from a limited number of people (forumites) and not to let any trend of reply be seen as ’law’.

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By *prite128Woman
over a year ago

maidstone

"I know it's all about live & let live but, honestly, if we were contacted by someone who said he/she wore a colostomy bag we'd very quickly a polite thanks, but no thanks response to them. I'm sure people with illnesses and ailments of all descriptions shouldn't be made to feel that they are not derserving of a healthy sex life but I think they need to keep it to themselves really."

as someone who has a illness /ailment which affeccts my daily life to a varyin degree should i be removing myself from the swinging community then wishy ?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

Im totally disgusted by peaches reply talk about making someone feel alienated because they have an illness

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I replied to the last thread ref colostomy bags and i stick by what i say, i would have NO problem meeting someone with a bag,but then again i deal with it day in day out in my proffesion. But then again ignorance is bliss to some people, and perhaps they should read the subject and see what a colostomy bag is about - ( you dont see anything) and like i said before sexy lingerie can hide the bag as its only 5inches by 3 and close to the body, its not all tubes!!!!! and i would be very surprised if the non wearer would even notice.

Personally i find bad breath and dandruff more offensive!!

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By *dinburghcouple123 OP Couple
over a year ago

edinburgh

i feel i have obviously raised a issue which some people find close to there heart or offensive to which i wont apologise however i do feel this thread will be pulled ,but i would like to thamkyou all both negative and posotive comments s and t

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Have played with a guy on this site who has a bag it caused no problems for either him or myself.

Having a different type of illness/disability it takes all sort and no one should have to feel they cant swing if they want to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i dont think the thread should be pulled as the percentage of population in swinging with colostomy bags is higher than we probably imagine, and i think this post has highlighted a valid point and as adults we are able to debate sensibly without personal attack on sufferers.

And as a nurse and swinger im thankful for the raising of awareness in the condition and it can only help promote a more unnegative attitude to some who automatically assume bags are huge see through things with tubes attached etc - the same thought i had before i went into nursing im ashamed to say.

but being in the profession i see and know how sufferers are - YES THEY ARE NORMAL AND ACTIVE and i also see how the bag looks 5 X 3 INCHES BEIGE AND ATTACHED BY A FLANGE AND IS NOT MORE THAN 1 CM AWAY FROM THE BODY, if you felt for it you would just think it was an inside pocket in a coat.

So please do not pull this thread, make people aware.

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By *i 1 Get 1 FreeCouple (MM)
over a year ago

birmingham

Whilst Peaches is a great poster on here with a GSOH, however, on this subject we're both saddened to have read her reply

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

There is nothing wrong with the thread or question, so the thread is staying up.

For us never having any dealing with the subject we can't answer the question, but maybe there are others who will come along who can.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've waited a while before posting on this particular thread, but just feel I want to say this.

There are members of just about every walk of life on this site, all colours, all creeds, all heights, all sizes, all ages, some who are perfectly healthy in mind and body and some who are not.

We ALL have issues, whether they be about our age, size, colour, health - I challenge any one of you to swear you are happy with absolutely EVERYTHING about yourself.

The point is this is a community, and we won't like everyone thats just not humanly possible, but we should have respect for EVERYONE no matter what.

So no matter what your issues are with yourself or anyone else, just remember we are here fundamentally for fun, to make others smile, so make friends if someone is not your cup of tea, smile and walk on by, but always SMILE

The world is a miserable enough place and shit happens so often outside of these forums - some of us enjoy being here because its a place of friendship and hugs - SO HUGS TO ALL xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are also some fantastic lingerie websites for Ileostomy, Urostomy or Colostomy sufferers. And they discretely hide the stoma pouch so its non-seen. And very very sexy too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its actually a fascinating thread and a brave one too

I think we should all be mature enough to discuss things

I feel we must acknowledge that all people have different opinions on different subjects

I personally used to see a girl with a bag a long time ago and never found any problem with it

After all i don't tend to look at the wrapping im more interested in the prezzie xx

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By *heekychezzaWoman
over a year ago

warrington

"I've waited a while before posting on this particular thread, but just feel I want to say this.

There are members of just about every walk of life on this site, all colours, all creeds, all heights, all sizes, all ages, some who are perfectly healthy in mind and body and some who are not.

We ALL have issues, whether they be about our age, size, colour, health - I challenge any one of you to swear you are happy with absolutely EVERYTHING about yourself.

The point is this is a community, and we won't like everyone thats just not humanly possible, but we should have respect for EVERYONE no matter what.

The world is a miserable enough place and shit happens so often outside of these forums - some of us enjoy being here because its a place of friendship and hugs - SO HUGS TO ALL xxx"

hear hear...nice post Raz xxHUGSxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

we have met 2 couples and as long as they are upfront about it we have not had a problem with this issue we are all looking for the same thing to have fun

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By *dinburghcouple123 OP Couple
over a year ago

edinburgh

i would lie to thank everyone for the comments and the wonderful moderators who are big enough to stand up and let this thread stand also to the people who have messaged us with there kind comments and support so once again a big thankyou xx s and t xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

xxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On a slightly different thread we were contacted by a couple we chatted abit on msn and eventually by phone, the male said he had something he wanted to tell us, he said he only had one leg and would it bother us, he lost his leg due to illness, to be honest i didnt really know what to say, we havent met yet not because of the disability aspect just that they live so far away, i really dont know if i could play or not, suppose that makes me a coward!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do not have a colostomy, but I did have testicular cancer, and the treatment used to cure me was to have Bilateral Orchidectomies, in lay mans turms I had both my ball cut off.

When my doctors told me that this was the only option open to me, I felt like a dog being taken to the vets, no amount of professional intervention helps prepare you for the physical changes to your body, when I came back to the ward and went to the loo, I looked down and wept.

The physical, is just one of the many changes you have to get used to, psychologically you feel you are nolonger a man, the possibility of having children are gone, and there is the constant fear of rejection.

Just because, you have lost your balls, does not mean you have lost your desire or need for sexual contact. I may have to have injections of testosterone every three months to keep me well, but the brain is a powerful organ, and I'm hornier than ever, and yes, I still cum in large quantities.

I am honest and tell people up front about, not having really balls, I have a esticular prothesis which means I have a bionic bollock, that feels like a fake tit. Honesty, very really pays, as I give people plenty of time to have a think about things and they never call back.

I'm supprised that people who claim to be so liberated, about sex, are so judgemental, and onesided, have a think about what its like to be the other person, just immagine if your sex life came to an end, how would you feel?

I am just as good in bed as the next guy, it's the brain and personal connection that make for good sex, not the fact someone might have a bag or prosethic ball.

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By *dinburghcouple123 OP Couple
over a year ago

edinburgh

no it doesnt make you a coward it makes you honest about your feelings however i dont believe his diability would affect the way he makes a woman orgasm..lol he me be well equiped elsewhere unlike a lot of guys with a little frankfurter does that make them disabled aswell ???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Appreciate your honesty i just think most able bodied people, cant see it from another less abled persons perspective, if that makes any sense.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This is a pretty emotive thread lol

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I do not have a colostomy, but I did have testicular cancer, and the treatment used to cure me was to have Bilateral Orchidectomies, in lay mans turms I had both my ball cut off.

I am just as good in bed as the next guy, it's the brain and personal connection that make for good sex, not the fact someone might have a bag or prosethic ball.

Our very first MFM was a man who only had one testicle......it makes no difference to the fun you can have, and indeed made no difference to us.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once had to have a nephrostomy bag, albeit temporary... A very sudden and painful kidney failure at the time...

Now we had been in contact with a couple but not actually met them, they thought that we were being funny as we kept putting them off, I was mortified at the thought of even going out with this bloody bag... let alone actually meeting someone, even if it was drinks and a chat.. Well, in the end we told them what had happened, they said we were stupid not meeting.. in the end I got talked into it, we went and had the drink.. and you know what, were still to this day great friends and i'll never forget how much better they made me feel about myself that night..

Ok it went, we never played till it was gone and me all healed.. but what a genuinely lovely couple.. and still are!

I can see why people may be put off... but try and remember they are still real people with feelings.. not just bags!

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By *prite128Woman
over a year ago

maidstone

"This is a pretty emotive thread lol"

it is , but its how we all learn, especially when people are courageous enough to share their own experiences.

and none of us know when we might face illness/disability ourselves as the past year has shown me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People with disabilities should enjoy a good sex life just like anyone else, but think if they are swinging they ought to be upfront from the start, is that fair?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"People with disabilities should enjoy a good sex life just like anyone else, but think if they are swinging they ought to be upfront from the start, is that fair?"

Totally......

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By *dinburghcouple123 OP Couple
over a year ago

edinburgh

yes i think sotey should be upfront and im sure they would if they were not stigmatized or judged by people who no nothing about them or even take the time to ask x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

intresting

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By *prite128Woman
over a year ago

maidstone

"People with disabilities should enjoy a good sex life just like anyone else, but think if they are swinging they ought to be upfront from the start, is that fair?"

it can be a catch 22 ..i dont have my difficulties on my profile but i will tell people who are interested to meet. Would be embarassing and unfair not to, for both parties.

I dont put it on my profile as i dont feel it defines me , especially as its often very hidden issue.

like the guy above who shared his story ( sorry i cant remember your name ) most people who i tell then dont come back to me , which is a killer for confidence but not something i can avoid.

luckily those who have met me seem to have enjoyed the experience !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"This is a pretty emotive thread lol

it is , but its how we all learn, especially when people are courageous enough to share their own experiences.

and none of us know when we might face illness/disability ourselves as the past year has shown me.

Very very true, none of us know what is just round the corner - changes in physical health don't always mean changes in needs, wants and desires.

And a polite thanks but no thanks if they don't appeal because of whatever aspect is all thats needed xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wow what a very emotive thread! the guy who had testicular cancer i commend u for your bravery for speaking about it and send u the biggest hug and pint!! at the end of the day there is none of us perfect and we never know what waiting round a corner for us and need to be mindful of other people. ignorance can be more of an issue as can judgement illness shouldnt stop people from swingin if other people have an issue with it remeber this " there but for the grace of god go i" im sure there are people who can see beyond an illness or disabilty but as per every post its personal choice who we see xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think as long as ur willing and able and maybe upfront with ur possible meet that u have a bag etc and both parties agree then its up to them,

we are all ment to be adults!!! we should start acting like one....and be more respectful to other peoples feelings...

were all huan and deserve to be treated as such

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I haven't read ALL the answers as there are too many. I got about half way.

It's worth thinking about the following: When something offends ME - I know that it is ME who has chosen to be offended and I have the right to find distaste in some items.

This post is NOT offensive to me as it asks a question simply. It does not ridicule and there may be a very genuine reason for asking. The only thing that can come from this is a better understanding.

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

As has been mantioned, there are ALL kinds of people on here for all kinds of reasons.

Pesronally i would meet someone with a bag who i felt attracted to or thought i could have a nice time with long before i'd meet any number of other people on here.....

...it's not for everyone of course, but swinging is a broad church, and one of the great things is you get to pick and choose who you want (within reason).

There are people on here who have habits/fantasies/desires/lifestyles and bodies i find personally repulsive, but i'm happy for them to be here to find the people who match up with them.

As with everything else to do with swinging, being upfront with people is half the battle...good luck to you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have to say i am really pleased the way this thread has turned out, its a total turn around rom the negative comments in th begining. It clearly shows an understanding for all people . Take a pat on the back folks well done youxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why on earth would someone take offense at someone asking a serious question. Ive never seen anyone taking offense at any other questions regarding illnesses. Peaches you can have a colostomy bag without being to ill to play, there are various reasons why people have colostomy bags.

Personally i dont think i would play with someone with a colostomy bag but i most certainly wouldnt take offense at them. What happened to humanity."

i suppose im more sensitive than others as my sis has one and is terminal.

therefore,... its a painful subject.

thanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wont comment on this subject again.

as its too personal a subject.

but appreciate the comments

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By *ansue35Couple
over a year ago

yorkshire

read this one with interest.

as i have bowl cancer, not got a bad. but like someone else came very close to wearing on.

If the person who has one and its been over 6 months can ask for a J bag, pouch or have the sigmoud ( not sure of the spelling LOL) done.

So if you know some that does have a bag, get them to ask the doctor to check it out.

i have known several people with bags, they know come in so many sizes, am sure the sports size is very small and with a bandage would cover it up.

would I swing with a bag on no just like people have said here would hate people to be looking at me all the time.

Would i swing with some with a bag on...

honest answer really Do not know, might

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Been reading thro the posts and have to disagree with a lot on here, firstly not everyone who had colostomy bags are ill as such, a friend of mine, none swinging friend, had bowl cancer a few years back and had to have everything removed and sown up, she is now fully recovered and back to full health, only because of the op shes left with no bowels so has to, for want of a better word poo in a bag, now i dont see that as an illness its just a side effect from her illness thats now cured, but i can assure you she has a very heathy sex life with her husband, i know i heard about it all the time lol so if she can have sex with him why not have sex with other people? there would be nothing to stop her only the reaction of people she contacted, i rememeber being in a club one night and there was a woman there who had had a mastectomy and i over heard a few nasty comments, mainly from other women if im going to be honest, which i found quite shocking, people are always quick to judge other, personally i dont see what it matters to other people if you have a colostomy bag or not, if you dont like it move on but its certainly not offensive, to say its offensive to me is saying trying to live offens people, if your ill, or are less then perfect hide away and be ill in private because if your not upto our levels of expectations we dont want to see you, now thats offensive, in my opinion

off now for a lemsip lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have met and played with someone with a colostomy bag from another swinging site.No it didnt bother me, they were more embarassed to mention it when chatting before hand.

I have no problem with people who have a disability or health problem that may cause embarassment to some.

I am more likely to be repulsed by bad manners and poor hygiene.

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By *Y MAN n MECouple
over a year ago

FIFE

"Have played with a guy on this site who has a bag it caused no problems for either him or myself.

Having a different type of illness/disability it takes all sort and no one should have to feel they cant swing if they want to."

we hae also played with the same guy...and boy oh boy you couldn't fault his enthusiasm, it was however a bit of a shock as he didn't tell us before hand and we'd chatted for quite awhile before playing...ok in our opinion it is not something you need to disclose on your profile but you should have the good manners to at least tell potential playmates, and if they have got to know what sort of person you are it should not make a difference..

we have since met another guy (part of a couple) who had one temporarily after an operation... two sides of the coin..first guy's confidence overtook the issue of a bag where as the second guy was embarressed and very concience of it... in both cases we had great fun and have absolutely no problem with meeting or playing with anyone, m or f... with a bag but it is nice to be told and given the option. Take care XXH&A

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/11/09 19:32:39]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"ok in our opinion it is not something you need to disclose on your profile but you should have the good manners to at least tell potential playmates

i do agree with this, its not something everyones going to be happy with so i think it is something that should be mentioned before a meet to stop you both being in an embarrassing situation.

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

Sorry folks.... I know I (Martin) am probably going to get slated for this... perhaps rightly so, but......

I couldnt play with someone who had a bag, I think its the idea of that person being "ill" that would put me off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sorry folks.... I know I (Martin) am probably going to get slated for this... perhaps rightly so, but......

I couldnt play with someone who had a bag, I think its the idea of that person being "ill" that would put me off.

but not everyone with a bag is ill, its like saying someone with one arm is ill, sometimes they just a side effect from an illness that has become better, like i have stated in my post above my freind has a colostomy bag as a result of having bowel cancer, she had her bowels removed and her anal passage sown up there for she had to use a bag, she made a full recovery from the cancer and is now in full pysical health, only she will always need the bag as she will never have any bowels, to me thats not ill, its just a side effect from getting better

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By *ebzStarWoman
over a year ago

Notting

As with any illness/disability, its a case of who the person is.

Its not the packing that is the be all and end all if the person inside is attractive to you.

Sometimes its a case of gettingt used to what is different and even on occasion makes them even more special

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

and can i just point out colostomy bags do come off, if you met someone with a bag i very much doubt they would have sex with a bag or pee and/or poo hanging at their side lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some of you may remember a thread about lumps, bumps and scars a few weeks ago (maybe longer lol) and I commented on there about my condition and had a huge positive response from people here.

I have like many on here a disability, which in my case was caused by an ingrown hair which became an infected hair follicle which leads to infected sweat glands in the areas where pubic hair grows. Since the condition Hidradenitis Suppurativa (for some unknown reason) affects the sweat glands which are in the pubic areas at first even though it can spread to other areas such as the face, stomach and legs.

Now in no way can I cure this not is there any effective treatment available at the moment in fact what I have is so rare that only 1% of the worlds population are diagnosed with it (although there may be as many as 1 in 1000 undiagnosed) and no research being done to find a cure or effective treatment since it is not common enough!!

What treatment that someone with HS gets depends on where they live and how knowledgeable their doctor is on the condition. Mostly its treated as a deep tissue acne which is not what it is but some of the antibiotics do get some good results, however not in my case and it has gotten to the point I do not have one single day without pain, and I am classed as disabled because of it!!

I do say on my profile because in me it is very noticeable - in fact I still have the scar on my right leg where I had skin grafted from to replace the skin from my right armpit because I has surgery in May to remove the infected area.

I was hopeful that it would help me (as it has many who have had the same operation) but alas I am one of the really unlucky ones because the HS is already back in the area!!

Now in no way does this affect my ability to have a laugh and joke nor does it mean you can “catch” it from me by sharing my bed for a few hours, since HS is not contagious in anyway.

I am not looking for sympathy just stating that sometimes you can look fine to the outside world but have something quite seriously wrong with you.

I think more people need to understand that we have no option in how our health is and how it affects our day to day life.

Nor will I stop swinging until I (and only I) feel I have to if you don’t want to meet me don’t .

I don’t expect everyone to find me sexy or attractive anyway (regardless of my medical problems) to be brutally honest.

I do think that people who have to wear bags of any sort (or anything which due to medical conditions is out with our control) should be made more aware that there is places that they can buy clothes which can be very fashionable and sexy while still covering the part you don’t want to show. I remember reading something about a woman who set up a website selling sexy undies for people with colostomy bags as she herself had one and couldn’t find anything which stored the bag safely and securely while still being sexy.

Sorry for the rant but I felt I needed to explain my reasons for my thinking and my feelings.

Shona

x x x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank you for your comments, it is refreshing to hear about the reality of having to live day by day with an on going medical codition.

We live in a society, where everyone strives to be perfect, no bumps or lumps etc, what a load of crap, its about time people stopped being so superficial,and shallow, perfection does not exist, full stop. We need to look beyond lables, like gay, bi, or straight,as deep down we are all attracted to the same sex, but not open to the expierience, because, we don't want to labbled as some thing thats not " Normal" how many couples have a list of things they don't like, especially Bi guys, get over it, we're not going to jump on you,and at the end of the day if it feels good, why worry about whoes doing it!

Those of us who have had medical conditions or surgery, in my case 11 operations live with our problems day in and day out, and somtimes it can be very had, after I had my testicals removed it was over 10 years before I had sex, because I was too worried about what other people might think. You are not sleeping with the condition, you are sleeping with a human being, and we just like you have needs, I still wake up with a throbbing hard on, and could shag non stop, so come on don't be frightened to ask about things, and become informed people, who are not scared by lumps, bumps, rashes or bags. Lets show the rest of society that Swingers are, a group of non judgmental, caring people who see beyond lables and the rest of that crap, and enjoy quality sex with quality people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think there are a few folk posting here who really do need to carry out a bit of a reality check.

I doubt very much there more than a handful of profiles on this, or any other swinging or dating site who have put they would have sex with literally anyone

In other words we all have preferences and therefore have made judgmental decisions with regard to how we conduct our swinging lives.

It's no different to all of our vanilla lives as we all make choices based on like or dislike about virtually every thing we ever do.

The OP asked a question and at least one person has been vilified for giving an open and honest response based on ACTUAL EXPERIENCE and I for one think the criticism leveled at her post was totally uncalled for.

I have no personal experience of this medical condition although we have a very good friend who needs to use a colostomy bag.

I would not choose to have sex with someone who had one as it simply is something I do not fancy or feel comfy with. There does not have to be any logic applied to that decision, it's simply the choice that I make.

It's absolutely no different what so ever to young folk not wanting to play with older folk, slim folk not wanting to play with less slim folk, non smokers not wanting to play with smokers etc etc.

Swinging, just like life is all about personal choice and for someone to be openly criticised for making a choice is simply wrong.

I am the wrong side of 50 and Mrs Two has a while to. Whilst she is a fox I am not very tall, a bit over weight and I know and fully accept that there will be a huge swathe of the swinging community who will not want to play with me.

Perhaps a few others ought to have that sort of broader outlook on life and accept that for lots of people medical conditions will always make them feel uncomfortable, not ideal but somthing that needs getting over as opposed to feeling disenfranchised

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i bet that took u a long time to write that eh lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i bet that took u a long time to write that eh lol

not as long as it to you to write your reply tho

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

To be fair, I don't think anyone has said on the thread that you shouldn't be allowed to say you wouldn't want to meet someone who has had a colostomy.

Everyone has a right to say that and the OP by the way they have spoken seem to think the same.

The comments were more that the OP wasn't wrong to ask their question.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont believe the OP was wrong to ask the question in the same way I dont believe that Peaches was wrong to air her views.

My point is that I do honestly believe that a few folk on here have a far more touchy feely outlike on life than what is reality.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It wasnt wrong to ask the question, this site is open to everyone over the age of 18 no matter what, if you have something out of the ordinary its only natural that your going to ask people if they are ok with it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I dont believe the OP was wrong to ask the question in the same way I dont believe that Peaches was wrong to air her views.

My point is that I do honestly believe that a few folk on here have a far more touchy feely outlike on life than what is reality.

i have to agree with moobs here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

moobs..........Dec 6th could well be your last day on this planet miss

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By *dinburghcouple123 OP Couple
over a year ago

edinburgh

nobody on here has meant to be villianized, it was just a subject close to us which we thought we could discuss in an adult a mature way with others .We dont expect anyyone to jump into bed with us ,and yes everybody have the rght and freedom to make there own choices, thats what makes us human and infalible ,from our point of view yet again it proves it good to talk ,,s nad t x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"moobs..........Dec 6th could well be your last day on this planet miss

This Planet??? Well... assumes she was on it to start with eh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

oh i see u been let out of ya cage lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I wiil actually apologise for my comments.

The op had a valid reason for airing her/his views and i would back that all the way.

And my opinions really shouldnt have entered the equasion.

As it was to close to home.

But then im not the only person affected by this condition.

My apologies to the OP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wiil actually apologise for my comments.

The op had a valid reason for airing her/his views and i would back that all the way.

And my opinions really shouldnt have entered the equasion.

As it was to close to home.

But then im not the only person affected by this condition.

My apologies to the OP. "

still ur opion too and ur entitled to that too. dont worry its only a forum

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

"I wiil actually apologise for my comments.

The op had a valid reason for airing her/his views and i would back that all the way.

And my opinions really shouldnt have entered the equasion.

As it was to close to home.

But then im not the only person affected by this condition.

My apologies to the OP. "

Well i think it takes a big person to apologise

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh im big.....lmao

you should see my ass

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

But......

my apology was sent in the best way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the best way is to be sent on a hairless minge with bows.... u failed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

pmsl.....

nana

xxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We were wondering are there any other people on the site with colostomy/ iliostomy bags.. and how do people on the site percieve them. Are they welcome or not welcome in the swinging community s and t xx"
i had to have an emergency operation in 2001 for suspected appendicitus and woke up after surgery wearing a (temporary colostomy bag)i then spent the next 10 months totally freaked out by the sight of a stoma and i imagine it would have a similair effect on a lot of others too, but not all! so even tho i am sympathetic towards people who have a bag i also could fully understand another persons rejection towards it.i had succesful reverse operation and to be honest i would be put off meeting someone who wore a bag, thats just my personal choice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I replied to the last thread ref colostomy bags and i stick by what i say, i would have NO problem meeting someone with a bag,but then again i deal with it day in day out in my proffesion. But then again ignorance is bliss to some people, and perhaps they should read the subject and see what a colostomy bag is about - ( you dont see anything) and like i said before sexy lingerie can hide the bag as its only 5inches by 3 and close to the body, its not all tubes!!!!! and i would be very surprised if the non wearer would even notice.

Personally i find bad breath and dandruff more offensive!!"

i totally agree why shud this make a difference everyone has something wrong with then, be it physical, mental or just plain ignorance.

live and let live disability or not

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally i find bad breath and dandruff more offensive!!

i totally agree why shud this make a difference everyone has something wrong with then, be it physical, mental or just plain ignorance.

live and let live disability or not "

And no doubt you also agree that we should all live and let live with regard to personal choice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally i find bad breath and dandruff more offensive!!

i totally agree why shud this make a difference everyone has something wrong with then, be it physical, mental or just plain ignorance.

live and let live disability or not

And no doubt you also agree that we should all live and let live with regard to personal choice

yeah each person has the right to pick and choose no one if forced to meet anyone they dont want to. but just because someone is different doesnt mean they shud b treated that way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not sure I saw that in this thread

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