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"I’m surprised you get any work done with the amount you talk about .."Yeah I love a good chat at work. It makes the day go by so much smoother. | |||
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Eve | |||
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"I’m surprised you get any work done with the amount you talk about ..
Yeah I love a good chat at work. It makes the day go by so much smoother. "Do you still wrestle with your colleague ? | |||
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"I’m surprised you get any work done with the amount you talk about .."Me thinking the same at work  | |||
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"I’m surprised you get any work done with the amount you talk about ..
Yeah I love a good chat at work. It makes the day go by so much smoother.
Do you still wrestle with your colleague ?"Oh yeah we always 'wrestle'! Why have a boring day!?!! | |||
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"Do people not know that when they get married that means splitting up will be costly and if they want more control over what they keep if they do that they can get a prenup? I just thought it was common knowledge. " I can't imagine most people are thinking about splitting up when they get married  | |||
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"Do people not know that when they get married that means splitting up will be costly and if they want more control over what they keep if they do that they can get a prenup? I just thought it was common knowledge. I can't imagine most people are thinking about splitting up when they get married "No but you're also not thinking about your house burning down when you buy one but you still get insurance. People just seem so surprised it's costly when it happens and even as someone with no interest in getting married, I can understand being ill prepared but I can't understand being surprised. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. " Happened to me. Had a great life and a really nice house. She cheated on me with an ex boyfriend, and then divorced me. They now live in that house, and I walked away with 1/5 of the equity to start again. After 4 years I’m just getting back to where I was. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. " Have you heard her side of the story directly from her? | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. Have you heard her side of the story directly from her?" Yes I have had the ladies side of their divorce stories. It's never nice. Their all depressing. So sad. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. Happened to me. Had a great life and a really nice house. She cheated on me with an ex boyfriend, and then divorced me. They now live in that house, and I walked away with 1/5 of the equity to start again. After 4 years I’m just getting back to where I was. " This has happened to so many men I've known. Chin up and shoulder on regardless. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. Happened to me. Had a great life and a really nice house. She cheated on me with an ex boyfriend, and then divorced me. They now live in that house, and I walked away with 1/5 of the equity to start again. After 4 years I’m just getting back to where I was. " Is that because you have children together? | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. " Law of the land? Bollocks. My first wife cheated with a new boss at work so I walked out. 50/50 split on the house and I paid the divorce application fee, no lawyers involved and didn't pay her a penny. Amicable split with the 2nd. I'd put the deposit on the house so after that was calculated we split the proceeds 50/50. I paid the fee and again, no lawyers or any additional payments. The only winners when it goes to court are the lawyers. Even if you hate eachothers guts it's best to come to an amicable arrangement. More complicated when kids involved obviously but can be done at minimal cost with no unnecessary expenses or fees. The new system of not having to attribute any blame is great - nobody should be forced to accept liability for a failed marriage unless appropriate. A | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. Have you heard her side of the story directly from her? Yes I have had the ladies side of their divorce stories. It's never nice. Their all depressing. So sad. " No, not other womens stories, the side of the woman he's divorcing. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. " Did she give up work to look after the kids? Or go part time and so lose wage/ pension? | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. Have you heard her side of the story directly from her? Yes I have had the ladies side of their divorce stories. It's never nice. Their all depressing. So sad. No, not other womens stories, the side of the woman he's divorcing." As Thier all divorced and dont want to see each other ANYMORE, it's highly unlikely we'll ever hear her side of the story. So to answer no. Why do you think the men are lying? Bearing in mind we are away from home and the wives are at home. Of course none of them refuse to accept the law or responsibilities(moral duties). | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. Did she give up work to look after the kids? Or go part time and so lose wage/ pension?" That's why you come out with more than we do. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. " Try my ex had 80%.and payed off dept she ran up as she stopped working to avoid paying it. Now with a woman who is not materialistic at all. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. Try my ex had 80%.and payed off dept she ran up as she stopped working to avoid paying it. Now with a woman who is not materialistic at all. " 80%!wow poor you. You must have had a lot of children to look after. | |||
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"I got divorced due to abuse, physical, mental and monetary. Because I left the household and my child (which I could not take because I had nowhere to live) she was able to take me for everything she could. I was declared bankrupt because she and her legal representatives tried to get me to commit purgury, which I would not do and not settlement could be made. I lost everything even though she had never worked or paid for any part of mortgage, bills etc. Then when her side had settled with the bankruptcy she started to abuse our child. He is now with me full time but once more I’m in debt to the time of £65k to cover the law firm and court bills. She still has the 4 bed semi house which there was only £23k was left to pay on when I left, while I’m renting a 2 bed with my son. Sometimes our justice system is wrong. " My ex cost me 300k plus. | |||
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"I got divorced due to abuse, physical, mental and monetary. Because I left the household and my child (which I could not take because I had nowhere to live) she was able to take me for everything she could. I was declared bankrupt because she and her legal representatives tried to get me to commit purgury, which I would not do and not settlement could be made. I lost everything even though she had never worked or paid for any part of mortgage, bills etc. Then when her side had settled with the bankruptcy she started to abuse our child. He is now with me full time but once more I’m in debt to the time of £65k to cover the law firm and court bills. She still has the 4 bed semi house which there was only £23k was left to pay on when I left, while I’m renting a 2 bed with my son. Sometimes our justice system is wrong. My ex cost me 300k plus. " 3000k plus! Poor you. The law seems to overlook the ethical and moral issues, but more the legal entitlements of those concerned. | |||
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"I got divorced due to abuse, physical, mental and monetary. Because I left the household and my child (which I could not take because I had nowhere to live) she was able to take me for everything she could. I was declared bankrupt because she and her legal representatives tried to get me to commit purgury, which I would not do and not settlement could be made. I lost everything even though she had never worked or paid for any part of mortgage, bills etc. Then when her side had settled with the bankruptcy she started to abuse our child. He is now with me full time but once more I’m in debt to the time of £65k to cover the law firm and court bills. She still has the 4 bed semi house which there was only £23k was left to pay on when I left, while I’m renting a 2 bed with my son. Sometimes our justice system is wrong. My ex cost me 300k plus. 3000k plus! Poor you. The law seems to overlook the ethical and moral issues, but more the legal entitlements of those concerned. " That is the purpose of the law. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. Have you heard her side of the story directly from her? Yes I have had the ladies side of their divorce stories. It's never nice. Their all depressing. So sad. No, not other womens stories, the side of the woman he's divorcing. As Thier all divorced and dont want to see each other ANYMORE, it's highly unlikely we'll ever hear her side of the story. So to answer no. Why do you think the men are lying? Bearing in mind we are away from home and the wives are at home. Of course none of them refuse to accept the law or responsibilities(moral duties). " There are always three sides to a story; both the parties involved and the actual truth so until all sides have been heard, it's all lies. | |||
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"Divorced? The ex took half of a house that she had hardly contributed to and we weren't even married. I gave her 50%, she wanted more. Am I bitter? I'm more disappointed as my daughter spends more time with her than me and I don't want her to grow up with her standards." Yes they are still entitled even if you're not married. It's after living together for so long that they are entitled. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. Have you heard her side of the story directly from her? Yes I have had the ladies side of their divorce stories. It's never nice. Their all depressing. So sad. No, not other womens stories, the side of the woman he's divorcing. As Thier all divorced and dont want to see each other ANYMORE, it's highly unlikely we'll ever hear her side of the story. So to answer no. Why do you think the men are lying? Bearing in mind we are away from home and the wives are at home. Of course none of them refuse to accept the law or responsibilities(moral duties). " ...oh and you were talking about your friend, not couples in general. So you think all women don't work and stay at home then? | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. Have you heard her side of the story directly from her? Yes I have had the ladies side of their divorce stories. It's never nice. Their all depressing. So sad. No, not other womens stories, the side of the woman he's divorcing. As Thier all divorced and dont want to see each other ANYMORE, it's highly unlikely we'll ever hear her side of the story. So to answer no. Why do you think the men are lying? Bearing in mind we are away from home and the wives are at home. Of course none of them refuse to accept the law or responsibilities(moral duties). ...oh and you were talking about your friend, not couples in general. So you think all women don't work and stay at home then?" The post didn't imply explicitly or implicitly that women don't work. As that would mean sexist. And at Fab we're not at all sexist. Are we? | |||
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"I got divorced due to abuse, physical, mental and monetary. Because I left the household and my child (which I could not take because I had nowhere to live) she was able to take me for everything she could. I was declared bankrupt because she and her legal representatives tried to get me to commit purgury, which I would not do and not settlement could be made. I lost everything even though she had never worked or paid for any part of mortgage, bills etc. Then when her side had settled with the bankruptcy she started to abuse our child. He is now with me full time but once more I’m in debt to the time of £65k to cover the law firm and court bills. She still has the 4 bed semi house which there was only £23k was left to pay on when I left, while I’m renting a 2 bed with my son. Sometimes our justice system is wrong. " That's just awful. Sorry i couldn't just read and not express my disgust at her behaviour. I hope you and your child recover x Eve | |||
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"Divorced? The ex took half of a house that she had hardly contributed to and we weren't even married. I gave her 50%, she wanted more. Am I bitter? I'm more disappointed as my daughter spends more time with her than me and I don't want her to grow up with her standards. Yes they are still entitled even if you're not married. It's after living together for so long that they are entitled. " Not necessarily, my sister and her twins were effectively made homeless by the twins father. House is in his name only and he threw them out. Old Bill were called and she was told she was effectively trespassing by not leaving. | |||
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"Divorced? The ex took half of a house that she had hardly contributed to and we weren't even married. I gave her 50%, she wanted more. Am I bitter? I'm more disappointed as my daughter spends more time with her than me and I don't want her to grow up with her standards. Yes they are still entitled even if you're not married. It's after living together for so long that they are entitled. " Her lawyer pushed for a percentage of my future earnings and my pension. I would have been entitled to hers and she has a lot more money squirreled away than I ever will. She declined to share her NHS pension lol | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. Have you heard her side of the story directly from her? Yes I have had the ladies side of their divorce stories. It's never nice. Their all depressing. So sad. No, not other womens stories, the side of the woman he's divorcing. As Thier all divorced and dont want to see each other ANYMORE, it's highly unlikely we'll ever hear her side of the story. So to answer no. Why do you think the men are lying? Bearing in mind we are away from home and the wives are at home. Of course none of them refuse to accept the law or responsibilities(moral duties). ...oh and you were talking about your friend, not couples in general. So you think all women don't work and stay at home then? The post didn't imply explicitly or implicitly that women don't work. As that would mean sexist. And at Fab we're not at all sexist. Are we? " Yes you did, read it again | |||
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"I got divorced due to abuse, physical, mental and monetary. Because I left the household and my child (which I could not take because I had nowhere to live) she was able to take me for everything she could. I was declared bankrupt because she and her legal representatives tried to get me to commit purgury, which I would not do and not settlement could be made. I lost everything even though she had never worked or paid for any part of mortgage, bills etc. Then when her side had settled with the bankruptcy she started to abuse our child. He is now with me full time but once more I’m in debt to the time of £65k to cover the law firm and court bills. She still has the 4 bed semi house which there was only £23k was left to pay on when I left, while I’m renting a 2 bed with my son. Sometimes our justice system is wrong. My ex cost me 300k plus. " Some people are just t&@ts… That didn’t include the divorce or 1st custody case as I was declared bankrupt previous to this. | |||
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"I got divorced due to abuse, physical, mental and monetary. Because I left the household and my child (which I could not take because I had nowhere to live) she was able to take me for everything she could. I was declared bankrupt because she and her legal representatives tried to get me to commit purgury, which I would not do and not settlement could be made. I lost everything even though she had never worked or paid for any part of mortgage, bills etc. Then when her side had settled with the bankruptcy she started to abuse our child. He is now with me full time but once more I’m in debt to the time of £65k to cover the law firm and court bills. She still has the 4 bed semi house which there was only £23k was left to pay on when I left, while I’m renting a 2 bed with my son. Sometimes our justice system is wrong. That's just awful. Sorry i couldn't just read and not express my disgust at her behaviour. I hope you and your child recover x Eve" Thank you yes we are. I still have to make my child go see his mum even though he doesn’t want to and I have to pay for the privilege of taking him and collecting him as she doesn’t drive (but thats not to do with divorce but custody case and judge). He is old enough to realise what is happening and when his mum says if you don’t talk to me in between 4-5 pm as court order states (even though he’s doing after school activities) I don’t want to talk to you… he starts to think she doesn’t love him. It’s all very phycological but is damaging to his development. I wish the courts could see that. But he will soon be old enough to refuse to see her and I suspect this is what will happen. | |||
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"I got nothing except child maintenance and that ended as soon as each child reached 18. He resented every penny he paid and couldn’t stop quick enough. We don’t talk and he barely sees the kids who are now in their 20’s. " It is such a shame that one party always seams to feel so much resentment. It would be much better for the kids if both parties could be civil and be courteous to each other for the kids sake. | |||
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"I got nothing except child maintenance and that ended as soon as each child reached 18. He resented every penny he paid and couldn’t stop quick enough. We don’t talk and he barely sees the kids who are now in their 20’s. " Although it wasn't a divorce, my experience with my son's father was the same, just minus the maintenance. He had deduction of earnings orders but quit the job each time it came into force. Our son is nearly 20 and he has a very tenuous to absent relationship with his father. His father chose not to see him or communicate with him at all between the ages of about 7 and 14. I fell over backwards to facilitate them spending time together, often to my own detriment. I never wanted my son to experience what I experienced as a child (massive parental animosity) so I became something of a doormat instead. | |||
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"I got divorced due to abuse, physical, mental and monetary. Because I left the household and my child (which I could not take because I had nowhere to live) she was able to take me for everything she could. I was declared bankrupt because she and her legal representatives tried to get me to commit purgury, which I would not do and not settlement could be made. I lost everything even though she had never worked or paid for any part of mortgage, bills etc. Then when her side had settled with the bankruptcy she started to abuse our child. He is now with me full time but once more I’m in debt to the time of £65k to cover the law firm and court bills. She still has the 4 bed semi house which there was only £23k was left to pay on when I left, while I’m renting a 2 bed with my son. Sometimes our justice system is wrong. That's just awful. Sorry i couldn't just read and not express my disgust at her behaviour. I hope you and your child recover x Eve Thank you yes we are. I still have to make my child go see his mum even though he doesn’t want to and I have to pay for the privilege of taking him and collecting him as she doesn’t drive (but thats not to do with divorce but custody case and judge). He is old enough to realise what is happening and when his mum says if you don’t talk to me in between 4-5 pm as court order states (even though he’s doing after school activities) I don’t want to talk to you… he starts to think she doesn’t love him. It’s all very phycological but is damaging to his development. I wish the courts could see that. But he will soon be old enough to refuse to see her and I suspect this is what will happen. " That is utterly disgusting. I wish bad sex and tiny dicks on her for life! I'm not trivialising there, I genuinely feel for you and your child. You sound like a great father, you're supporting your child and picking up the pieces. Huge kudos to you. Eve x | |||
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"I got divorced due to abuse, physical, mental and monetary. Because I left the household and my child (which I could not take because I had nowhere to live) she was able to take me for everything she could. I was declared bankrupt because she and her legal representatives tried to get me to commit purgury, which I would not do and not settlement could be made. I lost everything even though she had never worked or paid for any part of mortgage, bills etc. Then when her side had settled with the bankruptcy she started to abuse our child. He is now with me full time but once more I’m in debt to the time of £65k to cover the law firm and court bills. She still has the 4 bed semi house which there was only £23k was left to pay on when I left, while I’m renting a 2 bed with my son. Sometimes our justice system is wrong. That's just awful. Sorry i couldn't just read and not express my disgust at her behaviour. I hope you and your child recover x Eve Thank you yes we are. I still have to make my child go see his mum even though he doesn’t want to and I have to pay for the privilege of taking him and collecting him as she doesn’t drive (but thats not to do with divorce but custody case and judge). He is old enough to realise what is happening and when his mum says if you don’t talk to me in between 4-5 pm as court order states (even though he’s doing after school activities) I don’t want to talk to you… he starts to think she doesn’t love him. It’s all very phycological but is damaging to his development. I wish the courts could see that. But he will soon be old enough to refuse to see her and I suspect this is what will happen. That is utterly disgusting. I wish bad sex and tiny dicks on her for life! I'm not trivialising there, I genuinely feel for you and your child. You sound like a great father, you're supporting your child and picking up the pieces. Huge kudos to you. Eve x " '... Bad sex and small dick for life'. Wow that's not punishment. It's hell. Can't you be more lenient? Like your fanny will forever be... | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. " And what about those women who gave up their careers to look after said children and if they hadn’t done that would be earning just as much as him? No. I don’t think it’s outdated. 50/50 and if you’re not happy with that then, like Lacey said, you should have done a pre-nup. (Not you, I’m talking generally) | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. And what about those women who gave up their careers to look after said children and if they hadn’t done that would be earning just as much as him? No. I don’t think it’s outdated. 50/50 and if you’re not happy with that then, like Lacey said, you should have done a pre-nup. (Not you, I’m talking generally) " I know, we all agree that the woman has made a lot of sacrifices. I wouldn't mind paying more for my ex if she was looking after our children. In fact I'd give more. And they would have the house (ex wife and children). I would move out. The children come first. All the men agree that the children and mother comes first. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. And what about those women who gave up their careers to look after said children and if they hadn’t done that would be earning just as much as him? No. I don’t think it’s outdated. 50/50 and if you’re not happy with that then, like Lacey said, you should have done a pre-nup. (Not you, I’m talking generally) I know, we all agree that the woman has made a lot of sacrifices. I wouldn't mind paying more for my ex if she was looking after our children. In fact I'd give more. And they would have the house (ex wife and children). I would move out. The children come first. All the men agree that the children and mother comes first. " I’m sure everyone’s situation is different. I’ve never been through it and never will. Was just a thought | |||
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"I got nothing except child maintenance and that ended as soon as each child reached 18. He resented every penny he paid and couldn’t stop quick enough. We don’t talk and he barely sees the kids who are now in their 20’s. " My dad gave my mum extra on top of child maintenance. He didn't want me and my brother to suffer by leaving my mum struggling because he decided to leave. Obviously there was still less money than if they were living together but we never went without and my mum still managed things like caravan holidays the first few years and then a couple of holidays abroad when we were older. My dad only took a small payout from the equity of house to help him set up a new home but lived in house shares for a few years before renting his friend's flat. He's in his 50s now and bought a 25% share in a shared ownership house because his age made it harder to get a mortgage. I know my mum still struggled though despite that and being the higher earner because she got a financial advisor when we were teenagers to help her pay off debt from the years following the divorce. She also massively went without herself and had to borrow money from her parents a few times for things like boiler and car problems. I honestly have nothing but respect for them both for how they handled it and the massive sacrifices they've both made for our sake and it always makes me so sad when things get so bitter, especially when there's children involved as they will suffer as a result. They're both doing pretty well now but probably less so than if they hadn't split but I think that's always going to be the case without shared assets. My mum managed to pay off the house thanks to inheritance a few years ago and now living with a new long term partner. I hope that one day I'll be able to help my dad pay for more of his house or he meets someone to invest in something together. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. And what about those women who gave up their careers to look after said children and if they hadn’t done that would be earning just as much as him? No. I don’t think it’s outdated. 50/50 and if you’re not happy with that then, like Lacey said, you should have done a pre-nup. (Not you, I’m talking generally) " Honestly I feel like they should be compulsory . If they can't agree when on good terms then it's not a good sign for the marriage! | |||
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"I got nothing except child maintenance and that ended as soon as each child reached 18. He resented every penny he paid and couldn’t stop quick enough. We don’t talk and he barely sees the kids who are now in their 20’s. My dad gave my mum extra on top of child maintenance. He didn't want me and my brother to suffer by leaving my mum struggling because he decided to leave. Obviously there was still less money than if they were living together but we never went without and my mum still managed things like caravan holidays the first few years and then a couple of holidays abroad when we were older. My dad only took a small payout from the equity of house to help him set up a new home but lived in house shares for a few years before renting his friend's flat. He's in his 50s now and bought a 25% share in a shared ownership house because his age made it harder to get a mortgage. I know my mum still struggled though despite that and being the higher earner because she got a financial advisor when we were teenagers to help her pay off debt from the years following the divorce. She also massively went without herself and had to borrow money from her parents a few times for things like boiler and car problems. I honestly have nothing but respect for them both for how they handled it and the massive sacrifices they've both made for our sake and it always makes me so sad when things get so bitter, especially when there's children involved as they will suffer as a result. They're both doing pretty well now but probably less so than if they hadn't split but I think that's always going to be the case without shared assets. My mum managed to pay off the house thanks to inheritance a few years ago and now living with a new long term partner. I hope that one day I'll be able to help my dad pay for more of his house or he meets someone to invest in something together. " I hope your farther is okay. Hopefully he'll find love too. Lovely story. | |||
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"I got nothing except child maintenance and that ended as soon as each child reached 18. He resented every penny he paid and couldn’t stop quick enough. We don’t talk and he barely sees the kids who are now in their 20’s. My dad gave my mum extra on top of child maintenance. He didn't want me and my brother to suffer by leaving my mum struggling because he decided to leave. Obviously there was still less money than if they were living together but we never went without and my mum still managed things like caravan holidays the first few years and then a couple of holidays abroad when we were older. My dad only took a small payout from the equity of house to help him set up a new home but lived in house shares for a few years before renting his friend's flat. He's in his 50s now and bought a 25% share in a shared ownership house because his age made it harder to get a mortgage. I know my mum still struggled though despite that and being the higher earner because she got a financial advisor when we were teenagers to help her pay off debt from the years following the divorce. She also massively went without herself and had to borrow money from her parents a few times for things like boiler and car problems. I honestly have nothing but respect for them both for how they handled it and the massive sacrifices they've both made for our sake and it always makes me so sad when things get so bitter, especially when there's children involved as they will suffer as a result. They're both doing pretty well now but probably less so than if they hadn't split but I think that's always going to be the case without shared assets. My mum managed to pay off the house thanks to inheritance a few years ago and now living with a new long term partner. I hope that one day I'll be able to help my dad pay for more of his house or he meets someone to invest in something together. I hope your farther is okay. Hopefully he'll find love too. Lovely story. " He's seeing someone but it's very early days . She's nice though. He was in a 10 year relationship after my mum but it ended quite badly. Fortunately no children together or shared assets. He lived with her for a short period but they had been living apart for a number of years by the time they split. Definitely made things easier. | |||
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"Of these unfairly affected men, how many gave up the opportunity to develop any career (if they worked, it was part-time, basic jobs, minimum wage, around the family schedule/school times) for X number of years, limiting their pension contributions during that time? How many men have sole or majority custody of the children? Curious to understand if their lawyers were poor in obtaining fair settlements, or if they reflect the reality of the full marital/familial labour & circumstances involved. The law is ultimately designed to be legally fair, but settlements depend on the lawyers involved. " A lot of people forget about the unremunerated role of the stay at home mother and the detriment that has on pensions etc. | |||
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"Of these unfairly affected men, how many gave up the opportunity to develop any career (if they worked, it was part-time, basic jobs, minimum wage, around the family schedule/school times) for X number of years, limiting their pension contributions during that time? How many men have sole or majority custody of the children? Curious to understand if their lawyers were poor in obtaining fair settlements, or if they reflect the reality of the full marital/familial labour & circumstances involved. The law is ultimately designed to be legally fair, but settlements depend on the lawyers involved. " Whoever gave up a career to look after children and do the school run, or work part-time is classed as an oral agreement at the time your family arrived.. Usually the higher earner Carry’s on working as that benefits the family most .. A divorce isn’t compensation for looking after children or giving up work, it’s a simple split of the family assets.. Family law has changed a lot in recent years and despite popular opinion in no longer favours the female half although males still moan unfortunately. And a very high percentage of custody is now 50/50 .. so maintenance payments are not needed either.. | |||
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"Of these unfairly affected men, how many gave up the opportunity to develop any career (if they worked, it was part-time, basic jobs, minimum wage, around the family schedule/school times) for X number of years, limiting their pension contributions during that time? How many men have sole or majority custody of the children? Curious to understand if their lawyers were poor in obtaining fair settlements, or if they reflect the reality of the full marital/familial labour & circumstances involved. The law is ultimately designed to be legally fair, but settlements depend on the lawyers involved. A lot of people forget about the unremunerated role of the stay at home mother and the detriment that has on pensions etc. " The government fill in any years lost due to child caring for the women. | |||
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"I’m surprised you get any work done with the amount you talk about .."Ha ha ha I was just thinking the same | |||
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"I’m surprised you get any work done with the amount you talk about ..
Ha ha ha I was just thinking the same"You think I talk a lot(at work). There's a guy there who is even worse than me. But we do get the job in hand done. | |||
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"Do people not know that when they get married that means splitting up will be costly and if they want more control over what they keep if they do that they can get a prenup? I just thought it was common knowledge. I can't imagine most people are thinking about splitting up when they get married "I did so she left simple answer don't get married it's outdated anyway. | |||
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"I got divorced due to abuse, physical, mental and monetary. Because I left the household and my child (which I could not take because I had nowhere to live) she was able to take me for everything she could. I was declared bankrupt because she and her legal representatives tried to get me to commit purgury, which I would not do and not settlement could be made. I lost everything even though she had never worked or paid for any part of mortgage, bills etc. Then when her side had settled with the bankruptcy she started to abuse our child. He is now with me full time but once more I’m in debt to the time of £65k to cover the law firm and court bills. She still has the 4 bed semi house which there was only £23k was left to pay on when I left, while I’m renting a 2 bed with my son. Sometimes our justice system is wrong. That's just awful. Sorry i couldn't just read and not express my disgust at her behaviour. I hope you and your child recover x Eve Thank you yes we are. I still have to make my child go see his mum even though he doesn’t want to and I have to pay for the privilege of taking him and collecting him as she doesn’t drive (but thats not to do with divorce but custody case and judge). He is old enough to realise what is happening and when his mum says if you don’t talk to me in between 4-5 pm as court order states (even though he’s doing after school activities) I don’t want to talk to you… he starts to think she doesn’t love him. It’s all very phycological but is damaging to his development. I wish the courts could see that. But he will soon be old enough to refuse to see her and I suspect this is what will happen. That is utterly disgusting. I wish bad sex and tiny dicks on her for life! I'm not trivialising there, I genuinely feel for you and your child. You sound like a great father, you're supporting your child and picking up the pieces. Huge kudos to you. Eve x " Thank you for your kind words. I don’t understand how any parent could not do the same. I don’t understand how fathers or mothers come to it, can just ditch their child and not want anything to do with them. My sons grandfather blamed my son for the court case and accused him of making everything up or being taught tell these lies by myself. He hasn’t spoken to his grandson in 2 whole years now, his name is missing from birthday and Christmas cards. I really don’t understand it. I would be trying to see my son grandson as much as I could. But then that’s just how I feel. | |||
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"Of these unfairly affected men, how many gave up the opportunity to develop any career (if they worked, it was part-time, basic jobs, minimum wage, around the family schedule/school times) for X number of years, limiting their pension contributions during that time? How many men have sole or majority custody of the children? Curious to understand if their lawyers were poor in obtaining fair settlements, or if they reflect the reality of the full marital/familial labour & circumstances involved. The law is ultimately designed to be legally fair, but settlements depend on the lawyers involved. Whoever gave up a career to look after children and do the school run, or work part-time is classed as an oral agreement at the time your family arrived.. Usually the higher earner Carry’s on working as that benefits the family most .. A divorce isn’t compensation for looking after children or giving up work, it’s a simple split of the family assets.. Family law has changed a lot in recent years and despite popular opinion in no longer favours the female half although males still moan unfortunately. And a very high percentage of custody is now 50/50 .. so maintenance payments are not needed either.." My divorce and custody case was not that long ago. My settlement was no where near 50/50 even after the bankruptcy lawyers took over. It was deemed the mother needed more due to the fact she was not working (had never worked from the time we met) and then due to an illness she came down with I had to stop work to look after her and my son. I still managed to work from home self employed to cover all bills. But I deemed to be in a better position (having on fixed abode, not worked properly for 7 years and no income / savings) and financially secure. In the end the bankruptcy was settled 15/85 in her favour not even clearing my debts which built up looking after family paying bills and mortgage. The first custody case 2017 was so biased towards the female that they never even bothered to look into all the lies and alleged incidents that were claimed against me. If you are abused that abuse does not stop and is carried through all family matters and it still is very much the case (especially with older aged male judges) that a woman would be very unlikely / unable to abuse a man. I was even told who could this 5’2 woman abuse you a 6’1 athletic man. So it is definitely not my experience of things usually being settled 50/50. | |||
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"I've walked away from every relationship with nothing and happily so ... including kids Just happy to make my own way in life without any conflict, seriously need no negativity in life " This is what I set out to do. I offered to still pay the mortgage until it was paid off, on the basis the house was put in trust for my son. Unfortunately that wasn’t good enough and usually one party wants more. Hope you achieved what you wanted. Happiness. | |||
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"I've walked away from every relationship with nothing and happily so ... including kids Just happy to make my own way in life without any conflict, seriously need no negativity in life This is what I set out to do. I offered to still pay the mortgage until it was paid off, on the basis the house was put in trust for my son. Unfortunately that wasn’t good enough and usually one party wants more. Hope you achieved what you wanted. Happiness. "Totally ... I've always been able to hold my head up high and live without all that negativity Also the kids and I might have had not a lot but we did have happiness, love and laughter (they cost nothing) and the best thing that I have is their total respect | |||
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"My divorce was a 50/50 split of proceeds from property sale. I am primary carer for our youngest child and he stays with his father 3 nights a week. Plus I paid all of the marriage debt as my ex husband refused to disclose finances. I couldn't afford to contest and so it's taken me 10 years to clear the debt... I paid my final payment this month and I am now debt free! I am not resentful towards him, I am happy that he's remarried and we have an amicable friendship for the sake of our children. NBVN x " If you have a good enough case the family court or the judge will award fairly, my divorce cost me half my share I got a quarter of the value but my children got brought up by her and she did a great job worth, every penny I lost. We split because of my Gender Dysphoria, she never once used or mentioned it in family court. | |||
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"Was the divorce because she didn’t lose the weight within the 6 months you gave them from your earlier post?" Okay I'll be generous and extend it to 6 months and 2 weeks. | |||
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"My divorce cost approximately £450. Split everything 50/50 and he was able to keep the house. It was still emotionally draining at the time but simple. The way I see it, I could have ended up with more but how would having a dad on the bones of his arse benefit our daughter? " Exactly leaving the childrens dad destitute does nothing for the kids especially if they are at an age / mature enough to understand what is happening. The child or children can end up resenting a parent not just for this but other things too. The children should be put first I believe but that does not mean giving one party everything while the other is left on their knees. | |||
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"So we were talking about divorces at work. And well one of the men was and is still soooo bitter about it all. Why he's got a real chip on his shoulder towards the females of this world. But then again can you blame the poor man? He seems to have had a history of cheating partners. His latest partner(wife) cheated on him yet she came out with 60% from Thier divorce settlement. Unfortunately or fortunately depending on how one looks at it, it does at first seem unfair? However that is the law of the land. In the west that is. Anyway we thought our fellow gentleman really did have anger management issues. When it comes to 'women'. Now he don't trust no woman. I do think though that the law maybe a bit out dated. I mean we all work long hours away from home, missed time with the children as they grow. Then you loose it all. " I can probably see where he’s coming from… because of one ex of mine from 1998ish, I trust no men… it’s never got better, after what he did. | |||
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"Don’t get married, simples. It’s always the man who will suffer more ." If, god forbid, we were ever to split up, there's no way Mr KC would be the one with the lower settlement. It was my money that put the deposit on our house. I earn significantly more than he does and I always have. I work FT, he works FT. He'd have 50/50 rights to the house but didn't put the deposit down and effectively pays less than me towards the mortgage. In reality, neither of us cares that I earn more or that I put the deposit down etc. But in a divorce situation, it would be relevant. | |||
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"My divorce cost approximately £450. Split everything 50/50 and he was able to keep the house. It was still emotionally draining at the time but simple. The way I see it, I could have ended up with more but how would having a dad on the bones of his arse benefit our daughter? Exactly leaving the childrens dad destitute does nothing for the kids especially if they are at an age / mature enough to understand what is happening. The child or children can end up resenting a parent not just for this but other things too. The children should be put first I believe but that does not mean giving one party everything while the other is left on their knees. " Exactly! We haven’t even got an official financial agreement. At the end of the day, it will all go to our daughter so there’s a lot of trust involved. We’re both equally financially viable & neither wanted to waste money on courts! | |||
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"My divorce cost approximately £450. Split everything 50/50 and he was able to keep the house. It was still emotionally draining at the time but simple. The way I see it, I could have ended up with more but how would having a dad on the bones of his arse benefit our daughter? Exactly leaving the childrens dad destitute does nothing for the kids especially if they are at an age / mature enough to understand what is happening. The child or children can end up resenting a parent not just for this but other things too. The children should be put first I believe but that does not mean giving one party everything while the other is left on their knees. Exactly! We haven’t even got an official financial agreement. At the end of the day, it will all go to our daughter so there’s a lot of trust involved. We’re both equally financially viable & neither wanted to waste money on courts! " Wisest choice. Avoid the Lawers. The money would be better spent for the children. | |||
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"My divorce was a 50/50 split of proceeds from property sale. I am primary carer for our youngest child and he stays with his father 3 nights a week. Plus I paid all of the marriage debt as my ex husband refused to disclose finances. I couldn't afford to contest and so it's taken me 10 years to clear the debt... I paid my final payment this month and I am now debt free! I am not resentful towards him, I am happy that he's remarried and we have an amicable friendship for the sake of our children. NBVN x " Well done paying the debt. Took me 8 years to pay off the debt I was left with. I had to buy my ex out of my house and gave her ALL the equity and I was still saddled with almost 30k debt. Had to rent the house out and live in barracks and shuffle money around until I could sell it. The only good thing is I got a clean break order so she couldn't go after my gratuity or pension. | |||
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"No disrespect to any lawers here. " I’m married to a judge. The one that has to make the final decisions. Every so often we sit and facepalm about the amount of money some people spend on barristers and court costs going through the legal madness when they could have (not in every case I appreciate) gone towards the children/housing. | |||
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I've heard the courts are even worse in America esp Califoronia  . Divorce & family courts there literally r#ped the men in 80% of the cases | |||
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"No disrespect to any lawers here. I’m married to a judge. The one that has to make the final decisions. Every so often we sit and facepalm about the amount of money some people spend on barristers and court costs going through the legal madness when they could have (not in every case I appreciate) gone towards the children/housing. " This… my ex has taken out 2 custody cases against me 1 she won and the last she lost. In both cases we both had to pay our own costs. To date that’s £85k I’ve paid in legal costs and I’m left renting a house for me and my son and the ex does not even pay maintenance towards him. But is living in the family home with her new partner. I do hope they are happy lol. | |||
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