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Don’t be shy

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

What is it about this phrase that I find irritating…..

I don’t not do thing because I’m shy, it’s generally because I choose not to.

Thoughts please?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

‘Don’t be shy put some more’ video. You are welcome

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple
over a year ago

Lincoln

Because it shows that the person saying it doesn't actually understand why you're uncomfortable about what they're asking.

LvM

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By *nexpectedExplorerMan
over a year ago

SA3

I am shy and it annoys me too. Like I choose to be paralysed by shyness at inconvenient times

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What is it about this phrase that I find irritating…..

I don’t not do thing because I’m shy, it’s generally because I choose not to.

Thoughts please?"

Your over thinking it .

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"‘Don’t be shy put some more’ video. You are welcome "

See, now I can never ever ever add more videos

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It feels kinda manipulative.

As a teen I have used that term, there's one tale I like to tell and it makes me cringe every time now.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Because it shows that the person saying it doesn't actually understand why you're uncomfortable about what they're asking.

LvM"

Thank you, yes, I think that it is

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

Think it's supposed to deminish your feelings. And try and make out you're in the wrong for not liking xyz.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What is it about this phrase that I find irritating…..

I don’t not do thing because I’m shy, it’s generally because I choose not to.

Thoughts please?

Your over thinking it ."

Why…..

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I am shy and it annoys me too. Like I choose to be paralysed by shyness at inconvenient times "

I’m sorry

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It feels kinda manipulative.

As a teen I have used that term, there's one tale I like to tell and it makes me cringe every time now."

Yes, it feels kind of manipulative to me too

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Think it's supposed to deminish your feelings. And try and make out you're in the wrong for not liking xyz. "

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

Nobody should be saying stuff like that trying to get you to do stuff you don’t want buy guilt tripping you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t be shy?

I’d probably say that to coax someone into doing something they don’t want to.

I certainly wouldn’t say it to someone I didn’t think I knew, at least a little.

Keep being shy Hippy, your photos are amazing.

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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago

Stirling

This proper irritates me also - I think people use it in the hope that you will do something just to prove your not - like being shy is a negative.

It’s quite a manipulative phrase - telling someone not to be something is pointless, shyness is not easy to overcome, a person can be aware of it and perhaps want to improve it but it doesn’t help when someone’s trying to shame them for being that way which is what I feel the phrase does xx

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli

I'm surprised anyone would have the nerve to tell you not to be shy, you're far from it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What is it about this phrase that I find irritating…..

I don’t not do thing because I’m shy, it’s generally because I choose not to.

Thoughts please?

Your over thinking it .

Why…..

"

I'm not going to explane you asked me what I thought I gave you my honest answer, to go any further could be considered as mansplaining.

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By *eddyBearBazMan
over a year ago

St Helens

Always been a shy person no matter how hard i have tried to get over it nothing seems to work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Like a lot of questions posed on here, context is everything. I'm not sure whether I'm alarmed, disappointed or both in the automatic negative perception that prevails here.

Can be positive encouragement or it can be manipulation, depends on context Hippy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What is it about this phrase that I find irritating…..

I don’t not do thing because I’m shy, it’s generally because I choose not to.

Thoughts please?"

Don't be shy, take your knickers off and sit on my lap

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't be shy, show us your rectum.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

If I was anxious about something, for example when I have to give talks to a room of over 200 people. "Don't be shy" isn't going to make me feel any better. I can't think of how it would be used that would make a positive impact on myself.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Don't be shy, show us your rectum. "

Pfft, todays pic are so far out of my comfort zone as it is

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick


"I am shy and it annoys me too. Like I choose to be paralysed by shyness at inconvenient times "

Yep me too, as Hippy has seen

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What is it about this phrase that I find irritating…..

I don’t not do thing because I’m shy, it’s generally because I choose not to.

Thoughts please?

Your over thinking it .

Why…..

I'm not going to explane you asked me what I thought I gave you my honest answer, to go any further could be considered as mansplaining."

Explaining your thought process is not mansplaining, but up to you

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"This proper irritates me also - I think people use it in the hope that you will do something just to prove your not - like being shy is a negative.

It’s quite a manipulative phrase - telling someone not to be something is pointless, shyness is not easy to overcome, a person can be aware of it and perhaps want to improve it but it doesn’t help when someone’s trying to shame them for being that way which is what I feel the phrase does xx"

I think this hits the nail on the head

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By *ockosaurusMan
over a year ago

Warwick


"Don't be shy, show us your rectum.

Pfft, todays pic are so far out of my comfort zone as it is "

They are all really beautiful done!

The one with you falling over and your feet in the air made me laugh too!

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury


"Think it's supposed to deminish your feelings. And try and make out you're in the wrong for not liking xyz. "

Who actually likes x y and z though. I'm all about the p q and r personnally

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"This proper irritates me also - I think people use it in the hope that you will do something just to prove your not - like being shy is a negative.

It’s quite a manipulative phrase - telling someone not to be something is pointless, shyness is not easy to overcome, a person can be aware of it and perhaps want to improve it but it doesn’t help when someone’s trying to shame them for being that way which is what I feel the phrase does xx"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Don't be shy, show us your rectum.

Pfft, todays pic are so far out of my comfort zone as it is

They are all really beautiful done!

The one with you falling over and your feet in the air made me laugh too! "

So clumsy

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Come and smile, don't be shy,

Touch my bum, This is life,

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Would you rather they just told you to “stop being such a fucking cock tease?”

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Would you rather they just told you to “stop being such a fucking cock tease?” "

No, I refuse

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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago

Stirling


"Would you rather they just told you to “stop being such a fucking cock tease?”

No, I refuse "

#clunge!

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By *iscean_dreamMan
over a year ago

Llanelli


"Would you rather they just told you to “stop being such a fucking cock tease?” "

I'd be telling them to zip it as I like the cock teasing

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By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago

Camberley occasionally doncaster


"What is it about this phrase that I find irritating…..

I don’t not do thing because I’m shy, it’s generally because I choose not to.

Thoughts please?"

Its the connotation that you should do what someone else wants rather than make your own decision with the added implication that there is a "reason" you aren't doing what they want.

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By *rivervaderMan
over a year ago

bolton

I’m sure I spoke to you at Manchester OP you was far from shy there talking to strangers

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

Depends in which context someone has used it I guess. Can’t remember anyone saying it to me I don’t think.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/05/22 14:16:28]

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By *2000ManMan
over a year ago

Worthing

Usually it does not end well if you go along with "don't be shy". By that I means it's to draw you out into either saying or doing something you do not want really want to do.

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By *wist my nipplesCouple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

It's pointless telling somebody not to be something. It's like "calm down" or "cheer up". Waste of time

Mrs TMN x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe he only wants a goer like nora

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts


"Maybe he only wants a goer like nora "

I am actually shy sometimes. More than people think.

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

I don't mind it if it's something I am mulling over, it can be encouraging. But if it's something I don't want to do it's just annoying. It depends who's saying it tbh.

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By *eroLondonMan
over a year ago

Mayfair


"Pfft, todays pic are so far out of my comfort zone as it is "

•

That was also my thinking, but it hasn't diminished any deference to your profile. It's YOUR profile.

In regards to the "don't by shy": I don't know about the context is but it's sounds like a disingenuous throwaway remark.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

To be clear, it isn’t necessarily just when it’s said to me. It seems to be used on here a lot.

I didn’t say I was shy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Maybe he only wants a goer like nora

I am actually shy sometimes. More than people think. "
about as shy as saffy shes game as fook

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By *ast_jjMan
over a year ago

Dublin and London

I think it depends on the context and person saying it.

My mother always says don't be shy helps your selves when food is on the table.

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By *ourbonKissMan
over a year ago

a land up north..... of leicester

It always sound a tad arrogant and presumptuous to me when I hear it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I must of had a charmed life because it's only ever been said to me as a form of encouragement. In a moment of self-doubt or something and usually resulting in being of benefit to me.

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By *ora the explorerWoman
over a year ago

Paradise, Herts


"Maybe he only wants a goer like nora

I am actually shy sometimes. More than people think. about as shy as saffy shes game as fook "

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By *ack688Man
over a year ago

abruzzo Italy (and UK)

It falls into the same category as men saying things like ‘give us a smile, you’re so much prettier when you smile’, it’s ridiculously offensive. It makes women feel that they are only meant to be happy and pretty and in the case of ‘don’t be shy’, also outgoing or forward, and it's a passive way to engage into an unwanted conversation. The fact that so many men still just don’t understand this is appalling.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Like a lot of questions posed on here, context is everything. I'm not sure whether I'm alarmed, disappointed or both in the automatic negative perception that prevails here.

Can be positive encouragement or it can be manipulation, depends on context Hippy."

Agreed its all in the context and the delivery too

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By *heArrowsCouple
over a year ago

Don't be shy is a form of manipulation.

It's me telling you to do what I want you to do, regardless of any personal feelings you may have.

Don't trust your gut, just do what I want.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It falls into the same category as men saying things like ‘give us a smile, you’re so much prettier when you smile’, it’s ridiculously offensive. It makes women feel that they are only meant to be happy and pretty and in the case of ‘don’t be shy’, also outgoing or forward, and it's a passive way to engage into an unwanted conversation. The fact that so many men still just don’t understand this is appalling."

This is awesome

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Don't be shy is a form of manipulation.

It's me telling you to do what I want you to do, regardless of any personal feelings you may have.

Don't trust your gut, just do what I want. "

I think so, but wondered if it was me

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By *irtydevil666Man
over a year ago

bristol

Don't be shy come and say Hi....

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By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago

Deepest darkest Peru

I also dislike this phrase

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I also dislike this phrase "

I’m glad it’s not just me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s someone thinking they’re being persuasive but are actually be the most noxious and patronising fuck wit.

And usually uttered by anonymous types.

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