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"My brother had a stalker for years and she was a client of his who just fell in love with him (they never got involved) and he really suffered cos of it as she was super persistent in many ways x It can be exhausting and extremely scary so thanks for posting this " It's unsettling when there is no rhyme or reason.. How did it get resolved, or is it still ongoing? | |||
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"Damn I thought it was lingerie week all week  "It might be, but my local force haven't covered that one yet  | |||
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"It's scary. Very scary! Mine wasn't as horrendous as some of the stories that you hear, but still very unsettling. I would advise anyone to contact the police, they were amazing when it happened to me. " Well done for reaching out.. Is it completely resolved now? | |||
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"Thanks for this midnight  "
It seems to be impacting more and more people x | |||
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"It's one of the reasons I will never, ever accommodate from here due to a very traumatic experience in which the police had to get involved. Everyone should be vigilant xx" Very true... I'm often stunned at how relaxed people are with providing information and access to 'strangers' Like you, I'll never accommodate again as I've also had a very bad and frightening situation with an ex Stay safe | |||
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"Don't ever feel silly about contacting the police, they really are very helpful in these situations now! Always keep a diary and any evidence (screen shots etc) definitely comes in handy. It's a horrible feeling when someone won't leave you alone and invades your personal space and privacy." Those are really good tips! | |||
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"I had a stalker in my early 20’s. People thought it was hilarious and I shouldn’t take it seriously. Deep down it was very unsettling especially when stuff started getting text to my phone that was very personal information along with sightings of me and who I was with. Then almost overnight it stopped. Something very very weird about stalkers. I could not be arsed to put that sort of effort it. " It's incredibly frightening wgen it happens... Were you able to identify who it was? You were lucky that it just suddenly stopped? | |||
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"A fantastic thread OP"
i hope it helps people to reach out for help if they are going through something similar | |||
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"I had a real life stalker when I was in my early 20s and had 3 children. I had to move out for a while until we found out who it was." That must have been very worrying with such young children too How did you establish their identity?? | |||
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"Well I actually have been a victim of this previously and it was a very difficult period of my life, at first I didn’t really take it seriously but things progressed and escalated with serious consequences. I thought I could handle the situation and even after my initial contact with the police I tried to just deal with it and sort of accept it not really taking it that seriously, my advice for anyone feeling like something is wrong with the way someone is acting is trust your gut feeling and seek help from the experts things can go wrong very very quickly and you don’t need to deal with it alone !! Even if you talk to a friend a family member don’t suffer in silence x" I think there is a stigma about reaching out and a fear of judgement, or it not being taken seriously. It's frightening how quickly a situation can escalate and ramp up and sometimes trying to ignore the issue is actually like pouring gasoline onto the situation Thank you for sharing x | |||
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"Well I actually have been a victim of this previously and it was a very difficult period of my life, at first I didn’t really take it seriously but things progressed and escalated with serious consequences. I thought I could handle the situation and even after my initial contact with the police I tried to just deal with it and sort of accept it not really taking it that seriously, my advice for anyone feeling like something is wrong with the way someone is acting is trust your gut feeling and seek help from the experts things can go wrong very very quickly and you don’t need to deal with it alone !! Even if you talk to a friend a family member don’t suffer in silence x I think there is a stigma about reaching out and a fear of judgement, or it not being taken seriously. It's frightening how quickly a situation can escalate and ramp up and sometimes trying to ignore the issue is actually like pouring gasoline onto the situation Thank you for sharing x" I felt the stigma was also about me being a guy and I also questioned if I’d somehow given her the wrong signals, maybe my friendly nature had somehow came across as I’m interested however after the initial warning signs I did deal with things and thought a face to face conversation would sort it out and the reception I got was that it had been resolved however that was just the start, it’s scary even writing this now puts a shiver down my spine, it’s extremely unnerving and becomes very feel in the blink of an eye. Some crazy people in the world and not everyone has genuine motives and goals, the end result of my issue was her being sectioned after multiple threats on me and family members and also multiple suicide attempts. | |||
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"I know people who've suffered at the hands of stalkers, fortunately not myself, and it's just so awful, and often insidious. I feel like with other forms of victimisation, it can quite easily be trivialised by those who don't know better, and the lack of understanding just compounds the trauma." Yes i think you are right - I think its very difficult fir some people to 'walk in someone else's shoes' and understand just how intimidating and frightening it is | |||
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"Well I actually have been a victim of this previously and it was a very difficult period of my life, at first I didn’t really take it seriously but things progressed and escalated with serious consequences. I thought I could handle the situation and even after my initial contact with the police I tried to just deal with it and sort of accept it not really taking it that seriously, my advice for anyone feeling like something is wrong with the way someone is acting is trust your gut feeling and seek help from the experts things can go wrong very very quickly and you don’t need to deal with it alone !! Even if you talk to a friend a family member don’t suffer in silence x I think there is a stigma about reaching out and a fear of judgement, or it not being taken seriously. It's frightening how quickly a situation can escalate and ramp up and sometimes trying to ignore the issue is actually like pouring gasoline onto the situation Thank you for sharing x I felt the stigma was also about me being a guy and I also questioned if I’d somehow given her the wrong signals, maybe my friendly nature had somehow came across as I’m interested however after the initial warning signs I did deal with things and thought a face to face conversation would sort it out and the reception I got was that it had been resolved however that was just the start, it’s scary even writing this now puts a shiver down my spine, it’s extremely unnerving and becomes very feel in the blink of an eye. Some crazy people in the world and not everyone has genuine motives and goals, the end result of my issue was her being sectioned after multiple threats on me and family members and also multiple suicide attempts. " Oh my goodness I'm glad you got it sorted and you and your family remained safe. It sounds very scary - I'm sure everyone in your situation would similarly microscopically examine their every action... But as the police say it's the offender who is to blame
I do think societal expectations make it harder for men to speak up on this issue | |||
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"I watched the program few months ago with Stacey Dooley about stalkers it was extremely scary the lengths that stalkers go to and how unhinged they are." Oh i haven't watched it, I'll see if I can find it on catch up | |||
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"I had a guy follow me around Manchesters gay village once. I wasn’t dressed particularly sexily or engaged with him. But every bar we went in he appeared and kept on looking at me. Ended up going home early and never saw him again. Nothing as bad as what some of you have suffered, but having a taste of it I can only imagine what it feels like if it’s constant and you can’t escape it. "You can feel bad situations brewing sometimes, i think you probably made a good choice to go home early, but I'm angry you had to make that decision | |||
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"It’s not actually something I’ve spoken about much but I do think it’s something I can help people understand or maybe if sharing a little bit of my experience helps even 1 person in a small way then it’s worth me commenting. " | |||
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"I watched the program few months ago with Stacey Dooley about stalkers it was extremely scary the lengths that stalkers go to and how unhinged they are." I watched it and completely understood the girls feelings about feeling sorry for the guy, I actually felt sorry for mine like maybe she couldn’t help it as clearly she was mentally unstable although I’m not saying it’s right or condoning it for one second. | |||
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I cannot imagine how that must have felt. I've had just a glimpse of it - online stalking me but no threats. Completely freaked me out last summer when he popped up here. Reading these other stories - it's horrifying how far people will go. The impact must have been huge on your mental health. | |||
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"It was more afterwards than during really as it was just something I was dealing with and like I said I didn’t take it seriously initially, the lengths these people go through are frightening. Mine is a mild experience compared to some of the horror stories we read about. " It doesn't sound a mild experience at all to me. | |||
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"It was more afterwards than during really as it was just something I was dealing with and like I said I didn’t take it seriously initially, the lengths these people go through are frightening. Mine is a mild experience compared to some of the horror stories we read about. " None of it is mild. It's as frightening as hell for all who have experienced it x | |||
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"Wow. Some really scary experiences. I cannot imagine how that must have felt. I've had just a glimpse of it - online stalking me but no threats. Completely freaked me out last summer when he popped up here. Reading these other stories - it's horrifying how far people will go. The impact must have been huge on your mental health. "Its shocking how many people have experienced it on some level  | |||
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"It was more afterwards than during really as it was just something I was dealing with and like I said I didn’t take it seriously initially, the lengths these people go through are frightening. Mine is a mild experience compared to some of the horror stories we read about. " Don't downplay it, it sounds pretty full on | |||
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"We all know life isn’t all sunshine all lollypops I’ve always had a positive outlook on even bad experiences ( if that even makes sense ), we can either curl in a ball in a corner and give up or we can dust ourselves off and embrace life, move forward and smile. We aren’t fortunate enough to get a second go at this, one life live it !!! We don’t ever know what tomorrow will bring x " Its a great outlook to have | |||
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"It’s not a nice or pleasant experience….. I used to get calls at 2 am in the morning just breathing and flowers sent to my work…. " Omg.. Do you know who it was? | |||
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"It's scary. Very scary! Mine wasn't as horrendous as some of the stories that you hear, but still very unsettling. I would advise anyone to contact the police, they were amazing when it happened to me. Well done for reaching out.. Is it completely resolved now? " Yes, it was many years ago when I was in my early twenties. We'd just been in the staffroom listening to a report of a woman being r*ped in the town the previous night, the first call I answered was a man asking if I was the one that liked giving blow jobs...I thought it was just a prank call so was playing along taking the piss. Then he told me that I'd got off a different bus to my usual one that morning (which I had, I missed my usual one), and that I shouldn't wear my hair up like I had it that day because it looked better down  The police were amazing, they sent an officer to meet me off of the bus every morning and put me on the bus every evening for a couple of weeks, gave me r*pe alarms and lots of advice and support. I got a couple more phone calls but not as creepy as the first one, although he was obviously still watching me as he mentioned the police... and then he just disappeared as suddenly as he appeared.
Like I said, not as serious as some poor people go through, but it's horrible knowing that someone is watching you but you have no idea who it is or what their intentions are...you become suspicious of everyone and you're just waiting for the attack to come | |||
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"Thank you for posting this and bringing awareness of this important subject OP. I was a victim of this many years ago. It isn’t nice at all. " I'm really sorry to hear that | |||
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"It's scary. Very scary! Mine wasn't as horrendous as some of the stories that you hear, but still very unsettling. I would advise anyone to contact the police, they were amazing when it happened to me. Well done for reaching out.. Is it completely resolved now? Yes, it was many years ago when I was in my early twenties. We'd just been in the staffroom listening to a report of a woman being r*ped in the town the previous night, the first call I answered was a man asking if I was the one that liked giving blow jobs...I thought it was just a prank call so was playing along taking the piss. Then he told me that I'd got off a different bus to my usual one that morning (which I had, I missed my usual one), and that I shouldn't wear my hair up like I had it that day because it looked better down The police were amazing, they sent an officer to meet me off of the bus every morning and put me on the bus every evening for a couple of weeks, gave me r*pe alarms and lots of advice and support. I got a couple more phone calls but not as creepy as the first one, although he was obviously still watching me as he mentioned the police... and then he just disappeared as suddenly as he appeared.
Like I said, not as serious as some poor people go through, but it's horrible knowing that someone is watching you but you have no idea who it is or what their intentions are...you become suspicious of everyone and you're just waiting for the attack to come "Oh gosh that is frightening.. It sounds like the police were amazing though. I'm so glad you stayed safe x | |||
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"Thank you for posting this and bringing awareness of this important subject OP. I was a victim of this many years ago. It isn’t nice at all. I'm really sorry to hear that " It’s ok it wasn’t you 
I often get asked why I don’t have face pics in my profile. This is the reason why | |||
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