FabSwingers.com forum: Advice needed

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Morning folks.

I have a joint profile with my lover which is mainly run by me and I'm finding it hard to say "Sorry not our type " without sounding rude or offensive and I end up rambling about something..

Can I have valid suggestions as to what to say please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Morning folks.

I have a joint profile with my lover which is mainly run by me and I'm finding it hard to say "Sorry not our type " without sounding rude or offensive and I end up rambling about something..

Can I have valid suggestions as to what to say please

Its not you, its me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I always say…

Thanks for the message but you’re not what we are looking for.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I always say…

Thanks for the message but you’re not what we are looking for. "

I like this one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pass

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By *reamblueMan
over a year ago

London

"Morning folks.

I have a joint profile with my lover which is mainly run by me and I'm finding it hard to say "Sorry not our type " without sounding rude or offensive and I end up rambling about something..

Can I have valid suggestions as to what to say please

Why do you feel obliged to reply st all?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just say I'm looking for something a little different but thank you anyway. You can only be as polite as possible, they will most likely take it badly whatever you say.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Just say I'm looking for something a little different but thank you anyway. You can only be as polite as possible, they will most likely take it badly whatever you say."

I tend to get flustered and get all tongue tied ( not literally)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always say…

Thanks for the message but you’re not what we are looking for.

I like this one

We haven’t had many negative responses to it so it must be polite enough.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Morning folks.

I have a joint profile with my lover which is mainly run by me and I'm finding it hard to say "Sorry not our type " without sounding rude or offensive and I end up rambling about something..

Can I have valid suggestions as to what to say please

Why do you feel obliged to reply st all?"

I reply to those my lover has winked at not looking at them properly when they message from wink.lol

Im the fussy one not him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always say…

Thanks for the message but you’re not what we are looking for. "

Polite and to the point

I’d go with this x

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By *icassolifelikeMan
over a year ago

Luton

You should say “U G L Y you ain’t got no alibi, you’re ugly! You’re ugly!”

Might get the message across?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

well do what 95% of people do to me, delete thw messge and dont say anything!

sometimes it better not to say anything at all...

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By *layfullsamMan
over a year ago

Solihull

"I always say…

Thanks for the message but you’re not what we are looking for.

I like this one

Then block or you’ll get 101

“Why aren’t I” replies

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're very handsome but not what I'm looking for sorry.

Hope you find someone nice.

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea

We just say sorry but your not what we are looking for .We’ve never had anyone being rude back the opposite in fact.

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By *unCuriousHarryMan
over a year ago

somrwhere over the rainbow, The Shire

"I always say…

Thanks for the message but you’re not what we are looking for.

I like this one

Maybe put a note on your profile stating ‘if we don’t reply please take that as a response respectfully that you’re not we are looking for, but we wish you all the best on your fabs journey’

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By *dalisqueWoman
over a year ago

land of make believe

"well do what 95% of people do to me, delete thw messge and dont say anything!

sometimes it better not to say anything at all...

This

Noone has time to reply to every message.

Save the thought for people you actually want to get to know.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always say…

Thanks for the message but you’re not what we are looking for.

I like this one

Then block or you’ll get 101

“Why aren’t I” replies"

We don’t get many of them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I generally only reply to people who have sent a message with more than 10 words, less than that it’s just an instant delete. If they don’t accept my polite no thank you, then I would block.

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By *moothGrooveWoman
over a year ago

Durham

I either go with... 'thank you for your message, I hope you find what you're looking for'. Most people can be between the lines.

'I've read your profile and I don't think we'd be compatible. Thank you for your interest'.

Usually people delete or thank you for replying. On the odd occasion they get arsey or try to change your mind for you, I just block them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"well do what 95% of people do to me, delete thw messge and dont say anything!

sometimes it better not to say anything at all...

This

Noone has time to reply to every message.

Save the thought for people you actually want to get to know.

I agree with this.

If they've messaged me I don't feel obliged to answer every single time.

I do reply to those I do want to know..Thats on my single profile.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Great suggestions by the ladies..thankyou

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By *weet and SpiceCouple
over a year ago

Around the Midlands

We thank them for the message, say that they are not what we are looking for and wish them well on their fab journey.

Don't usually get many replies asking why, in fact most reply politely thanking us for actually taking the time to respond (although looking at the above posts it seems a lot do respond)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always say…

Thanks for the message but you’re not what we are looking for. "

Still waiting for my copy of that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think you become hardened to it.

We have a section in our profile that says why we may not answer all messages. If people can not accept that, then sorry but not our issue. Many messages we received either have no pictures at all or have not read our profile, so it's easy to just delete.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On a platform such as this I don’t think anyone needs to explain their choices.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always say…

Thanks for the message but you’re not what we are looking for.

Still waiting for my copy of that "

Have you unblocked us yet?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's finding the right message that feels comfortable for you. I say "Thank you for the message, but I'm not interested. Happy fabbing." I don't give reasons, because that leads to pushback.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think you become hardened to it.

Yes this! I found it really difficult to delete messages unread. But that person hasn't even read my profile so why should I spend my time replying to them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I reply, which I mostly don’t, I say ‘not for me thanks’

Seems to work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Great suggestions by the ladies..thankyou

lol - you agreed with my suggestion!! im a guy!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thankyou for your interest but your not what we are looking for, happy fabbing and all the best..

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

[Removed by poster at 24/04/22 11:31:21]

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

I wish I could help OP, but I don't have any experience of this.

What would you say to someone if they were trying to chat you up in a pub?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Morning folks.

I have a joint profile with my lover which is mainly run by me and I'm finding it hard to say "Sorry not our type " without sounding rude or offensive and I end up rambling about something..

Can I have valid suggestions as to what to say please

Why do you feel obliged to reply st all?

I reply to those my lover has winked at not looking at them properly when they message from wink.lol

Im the fussy one not him

Ask him to respond to the messages from people he's winked at or to stop winking without agreeing it with you first.

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By *cottt27Man
over a year ago

Bothwell

Sorry I’m not your type

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Morning folks.

I have a joint profile with my lover which is mainly run by me and I'm finding it hard to say "Sorry not our type " without sounding rude or offensive and I end up rambling about something..

Can I have valid suggestions as to what to say please

Why do you feel obliged to reply st all?

I reply to those my lover has winked at not looking at them properly when they message from wink.lol

Im the fussy one not him

Tell him to hotlist them instead. Then you message the ones you like.

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By *rincess peachWoman
over a year ago

shits creek

"Morning folks.

I have a joint profile with my lover which is mainly run by me and I'm finding it hard to say "Sorry not our type " without sounding rude or offensive and I end up rambling about something..

Can I have valid suggestions as to what to say please

Why do you feel obliged to reply st all?

I reply to those my lover has winked at not looking at them properly when they message from wink.lol

Im the fussy one not him

Tell him to hotlist them instead. Then you message the ones you like. "

100% this.

Used to right fuck me off when my ex winked at people. Oh great, show interest without checking with me first and leave me to deal with the fallout. Nice one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I always say…

Thanks for the message but you’re not what we are looking for.

I like this one

Maybe put a note on your profile stating ‘if we don’t reply please take that as a response respectfully that you’re not we are looking for, but we wish you all the best on your fabs journey’

Doesn't always work...

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By *mperfectwomanWoman
over a year ago

Near Morley

I reply the following way:

- “Sorry I/we are not interested”

- “Sorry l/we are no longer interested”.

I do not feel the need to justify myself.

I ignore any “why?” message and if they insist my response is simple:

- “please respect my/our decision or I/we will have no choice but to block you”.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Morning folks.

I have a joint profile with my lover which is mainly run by me and I'm finding it hard to say "Sorry not our type " without sounding rude or offensive and I end up rambling about something..

Can I have valid suggestions as to what to say please

Why do you feel obliged to reply st all?

I reply to those my lover has winked at not looking at them properly when they message from wink.lol

Im the fussy one not him

Tell him to hotlist them instead. Then you message the ones you like.

100% this.

Used to right fuck me off when my ex winked at people. Oh great, show interest without checking with me first and leave me to deal with the fallout. Nice one."

Same!

Hence why best to use the hotlist and profile notes.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Morning folks.

I have a joint profile with my lover which is mainly run by me and I'm finding it hard to say "Sorry not our type " without sounding rude or offensive and I end up rambling about something..

Can I have valid suggestions as to what to say please

Why do you feel obliged to reply st all?

I reply to those my lover has winked at not looking at them properly when they message from wink.lol

Im the fussy one not him

Tell him to hotlist them instead. Then you message the ones you like.

100% this.

Used to right fuck me off when my ex winked at people. Oh great, show interest without checking with me first and leave me to deal with the fallout. Nice one.

Same!

Hence why best to use the hotlist and profile notes."

Very duly noted guys

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Great suggestions by the ladies..thankyou

lol - you agreed with my suggestion!! im a guy!!"

You too !!lol

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