FabSwingers.com forum: Time Wasters

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

What’s the actual end game?

Why do you waste your own time & my time just to go back to the very beginning

What’s the point in creating a profile if you’ve got no intention of ever meeting someone

You’re just here to p*ss people off for no reason at all

Whole night is ruined now

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"What’s the actual end game?

Why do you waste your own time & my time just to go back to the very beginning

What’s the point in creating a profile if you’ve got no intention of ever meeting someone

You’re just here to p*ss people off for no reason at all

Whole night is ruined now"

.................................

Care to elaborate?!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because someone didn’t want to meet you?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago

Bognor Regis

You got there before I did

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe they just decided against meeting you? People are allowed to change their minds

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ealitybitesMan
over a year ago

Belfast

Don't seem to remember the mocking emojis when a woman starts a thread like this.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't seem to remember the mocking emojis when a woman starts a thread like this. "

Just a charge of white knights instead.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was gonna say tough crowd today

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People are here for different things

Some are only here for the forums

Some are only here to chat to friends they made at clubs

Some are only here to show off they pics

Some are only here for dateing

Some are here just for mindless sex

And not one person is here for the wrong reason

As long as they up front from the get go or in they profile text to why they here

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *otMe66Man
over a year ago

Terra Firma

"Don't seem to remember the mocking emojis when a woman starts a thread like this. "

I have got to agree with you on this. The way people will mock another person who is obviously feeling deflated is awful. The same people are most likely to be joining in on the good mental health threads too...

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

So had this twice now

Talked for a couple of days, flowing conversation

Even had a FaceTime so we know it’s genuine

Planned a social, nothing heavy just a drink/chat no expectations from either side

Comes to the day of and it’s always some lame excuse and a block

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"Don't seem to remember the mocking emojis when a woman starts a thread like this. "

--not even the ones from women?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

As for the emoji people… grow up

What I’m basically saying is front string people along if you’re not planning on following up

It’s a waste of peoples time and effort

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *otMe66Man
over a year ago

Terra Firma

"So had this twice now

Talked for a couple of days, flowing conversation

Even had a FaceTime so we know it’s genuine

Planned a social, nothing heavy just a drink/chat no expectations from either side

Comes to the day of and it’s always some lame excuse and a block

If it is any consolation to you, you have managed far more on here than most men. Pick yourself up, dust yourself down, tomorrow is another day

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"So had this twice now

Talked for a couple of days, flowing conversation

Even had a FaceTime so we know it’s genuine

Planned a social, nothing heavy just a drink/chat no expectations from either side

Comes to the day of and it’s always some lame excuse and a block

If it is any consolation to you, you have managed far more on here than most men. Pick yourself up, dust yourself down, tomorrow is another day

Cheers mate, just seems a lot of effort from both sides to then be thrown away

As you said, we move on

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"So had this twice now

Talked for a couple of days, flowing conversation

Even had a FaceTime so we know it’s genuine

Planned a social, nothing heavy just a drink/chat no expectations from either side

Comes to the day of and it’s always some lame excuse and a block

...........................

So you been in conversation with people, they enjoyed to such a degree that they invest time in meeting you?

You arrange another meet where presumably they agree things will progress further?

They let you know beforehand that they've changed their mind?

I agree it's frustrating, but they're obviously real people, have taken time to talk to you and meet you and let you know before the next meet that they're unavailable. We don't know why that happened, maybe a genuine emergency, maybe a better offer or sadly maybe they changed their mind about meeting you.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"So had this twice now

Talked for a couple of days, flowing conversation

Even had a FaceTime so we know it’s genuine

Planned a social, nothing heavy just a drink/chat no expectations from either side

Comes to the day of and it’s always some lame excuse and a block

If it is any consolation to you, you have managed far more on here than most men. Pick yourself up, dust yourself down, tomorrow is another day

Cheers mate, just seems a lot of effort from both sides to then be thrown away

As you said, we move on "

It's crap, I agree. I've had it a few times earlier in the year. Frustrating but commonplace here I'm afraid.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don't seem to remember the mocking emojis when a woman starts a thread like this. "

Me either. A woman did post a thread very recently and had a very sympathetic hearing.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's rubbish when hole night is ruined.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"So had this twice now

Talked for a couple of days, flowing conversation

Even had a FaceTime so we know it’s genuine

Planned a social, nothing heavy just a drink/chat no expectations from either side

Comes to the day of and it’s always some lame excuse and a block

I don’t mind if something comes up as we all understand, plans change etc

But this last one has now blocked me on everything which is more annoying

...........................

So you been in conversation with people, they enjoyed to such a degree that they invest time in meeting you?

You arrange another meet where presumably they agree things will progress further?

They let you know beforehand that they've changed their mind?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *l6789Man
over a year ago

croydon

"So had this twice now

Talked for a couple of days, flowing conversation

Even had a FaceTime so we know it’s genuine

Planned a social, nothing heavy just a drink/chat no expectations from either side

Comes to the day of and it’s always some lame excuse and a block

Inexcusable but she took a better offer in her eyes mate, her loss. Unless genuinely her aunts cousins cat got covid then it’s legit

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"So had this twice now

Talked for a couple of days, flowing conversation

Even had a FaceTime so we know it’s genuine

Planned a social, nothing heavy just a drink/chat no expectations from either side

Comes to the day of and it’s always some lame excuse and a block

If it is any consolation to you, you have managed far more on here than most men. Pick yourself up, dust yourself down, tomorrow is another day

Cheers mate, just seems a lot of effort from both sides to then be thrown away

As you said, we move on

It's crap, I agree. I've had it a few times earlier in the year. Frustrating but commonplace here I'm afraid. "

I understand plans change and things might need to be rescheduled but to then block me on here and block my number is very strange

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *hubby CoupleCouple
over a year ago

Essex

Did you speak to her/him on the phone? A lot of men pretend to be women here, we always make a rule if can’t at least send a voice note then your a man, this will ruffle a few feathers but a SIM card costs £1 and a cheap throw away phone costs what ? £20 quid, when people say they can’t talk over the phone we just end the conversation there and then. Simples really

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It is a bit rubbish yeah, but people bottle it as well and some are embarrassed that they did that.

We had contact from someone that was visiting the area and arranged a quick social meet in town. We actually left another family social early to go meet them.

When we arrived at the pub I am fairly certain I clocked the female half sitting at a table outside. We got as far as the bar inside and had a message saying they'd had a Barney etc. Now we'd gone to alot of trouble and been messaging all the way up to the pub door, did we get a monk on and call them time wasters? Nope we walked around town picked a random bloke and fucked him instead!

Shit happens - just some people choose to deal with it in different ways

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *oan of DArcCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

"It's rubbish when hole night is ruined."

.................................

"Hole night"? Was that a Freudian Slip?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

At least they let you know op

We never know what's happening with people in their lives,or maybe they never intended to meet ,you'll never know sadly .

It's not ideal no,but at least you weren't left waiting for a no show.

Just counter block them

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago

Up North

"As for the emoji people… grow up

What I’m basically saying is front string people along if you’re not planning on following up

It’s a waste of peoples time and effort

Sometimes life gets in the way and have to cancel

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *imi_RougeWoman
over a year ago

Portsmouth

Happens to us all! It's incredibly frustrating.

If I change my mind or something happens I'll cancel well in advance.

Also been known to have a plan b.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ed LipstickWoman
over a year ago

Fucksville

I have had 2 no shows, I always message for a few days, phone call and then a quick cam call to check before we meet for a social. I'm a single woman on here don't judge!

One guy just didn't turn up or have the decency to text me, weeks later he messaged me on another platform saying that he'd just bottled meeting me (I was apparently too confident), begged me for another chance. I blocked him, maybe I wouldn't have done if he'd let me know he wasn't not turning up, maybe i would... he'll never know

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

Possibly a man masquerading as a woman.

Or a woman who loves attention without having to leave her house.

Sometimes people get cold feet and panic.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

It is a waste of precious time, and I'm not surprised you're annoyed.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Men have feelings too. I think a lot of people forget this. Sorry this happened to you OP x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That sucks op, I’m sorry you had that

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some really want the meet they get too nervous or reality hits home what they are doing, even had one cancel in the hotel room as couldnt cheat on her hubby, people have many reasons to blow meets out, it just be good if everyone could do it before the effort was made by the other party.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

I know men have cancelled on me for a better offer.

Usually someone younger and slimmer.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"I have had 2 no shows, I always message for a few days, phone call and then a quick cam call to check before we meet for a social. I'm a single woman on here don't judge!

Why would anyone judge? It's annoying though, but us single fellas get use to it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have had 2 no shows, I always message for a few days, phone call and then a quick cam call to check before we meet for a social. I'm a single woman on here don't judge!

Why would anyone judge? It's annoying though, but us single fellas get use to it

It's happened to me three times this year. Not just single men.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"I have had 2 no shows, I always message for a few days, phone call and then a quick cam call to check before we meet for a social. I'm a single woman on here don't judge!

Why would anyone judge? It's annoying though, but us single fellas get use to it

It's happened to me three times this year. Not just single men. "

Yeah, but we're use to it. We're encouraged just to suck it up.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"As for the emoji people… grow up

What I’m basically saying is front string people along if you’re not planning on following up

It’s a waste of peoples time and effort

You're actually basically have a moan in the public forum.

Have you any idea how many threads there are like this?

Have you any idea how many people of all sexes have this happen to them?

You think it's only you and we're the ones that need to grow up?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"It's annoying though, but us single fellas get use to it

And so do do us women. The smart ones amongst us don't let a whole night be ruined on a promise though

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"It's annoying though, but us single fellas get use to it

And so do do us women. The smart ones amongst us don't let a whole night be ruined on a promise though

Yeah.....I'm always turning up though

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *inky-MinxWoman
over a year ago

Grantham

"And so do do us women. The smart ones amongst us don't let a whole night be ruined on a promise though

Yeah.....I'm always turning up though

xx"

I'd trust you to

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"And so do do us women. The smart ones amongst us don't let a whole night be ruined on a promise though

Yeah.....I'm always turning up though

I'd trust you to

Hopefully that's a good thing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have had 2 no shows, I always message for a few days, phone call and then a quick cam call to check before we meet for a social. I'm a single woman on here don't judge!

Why would anyone judge? It's annoying though, but us single fellas get use to it

It's happened to me three times this year. Not just single men.

Yeah, but we're use to it. We're encouraged just to suck it up. "

What else are any of us to do? And it happens to women and couples just as much. I fail to see that this is just a single man pity party. I've been ghosted so often I may as well wear a white sheet.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"I have had 2 no shows, I always message for a few days, phone call and then a quick cam call to check before we meet for a social. I'm a single woman on here don't judge!

Why would anyone judge? It's annoying though, but us single fellas get use to it

It's happened to me three times this year. Not just single men.

Yeah, but we're use to it. We're encouraged just to suck it up.

What else are any of us to do? And it happens to women and couples just as much. I fail to see that this is just a single man pity party. I've been ghosted so often I may as well wear a white sheet. "

No pity here, I don't desire that at all. Just making a contribution to the debate

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

"As for the emoji people… grow up

What I’m basically saying is front string people along if you’re not planning on following up"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

Sped read this OP but it seems you did speak to them to check they were genuine so at least you did your homework.

The trouble is.....Fab guarantees nothing, and nor should it. It's just a means to contact someone, much like any other chat/message website or app.

People get let down every day on vanilla dating apps so why should fab be any different?

It's always good to have a plan B, and by that I mean an alternative idea of something to do, not a back-up shag waiting in the wings, although if you have a hotel booked it never hurts to stick a last minute 'meet today' post up. The night isn't 'ruined' unless you've gone to great expense and cancelled other plans - it's just no longer what you hoped for.

Much like your car breaking down on the way to a gig, or you waking up on a rare day off on a sunny day with the raging shits, or settling on the sofa to watch a PPV boxing match only to have a power cut just as the first round bell rings.....shit happens. You can't prevent it. You can't control it. You can't change it.

You just have to suck it up and look for something else to do.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I make back up plans to do something exciting (like a VAT return) just in case they don't turn up, cancel, ghost or fall into the black hole..

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"I make back up plans to do something exciting (like a VAT return) just in case they don't turn up, cancel, ghost or fall into the black hole.."

Pwoarr....VAT return! Sexy night ahead

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can see in wasting my time on this one

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uv2kissMan
over a year ago

fenland

Shit happens.

I was chatting to a lady on fab she left fab, we still kept chatting on kik and chatting on the phone

Then covid, finally its safe to meet probably 2 1/2 years after we had first started chatting.

Arranged a meet in a town near were she lived, hotel all booked and paid ( by her ) she sent me a screenshot of the booking.

I drove just under 4 hours got there and in the room I stayed, no sign of her.

No replies to my kik, phone just ringing out, after sitting there for around 4 hours I drove home.

I then blocked her on all my messaging apps and her number.

I just felt angry, I'm over it now

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*puts hand up*

I’m a time waster

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

It sucks.

Some people enjoy jerking others around online. They view it as cheap entertainment.

It's a risk with this kind of thing.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

"*puts hand up*

I’m a time waster "

I knew it

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"*puts hand up*

I’m a time waster

I knew it

Ahhh but I’m worth wasting time with

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never been accused of being a time waster. A disappointment and a tease. Perhaps!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I'd rather somebody gave a 'crap excuse', or even ghosted me that day vs going ahead if they weren't really feeling it.

Nothing worse than sitting spending time making awkward small talk with someone who only showed up because they felt obliged

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ave1976XXXMan
over a year ago

newmarket

What’s the point in wasting peoples time? Wasting your own time?

Don’t get it, it’s not my way

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ersiantugMan
over a year ago

Cardiff

I swear some people on Fab would literally shag anything if they made their mind up it was going to happen

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

some people line up more than one meet in anticipation of a no show...

some people get shy and chicken out

some dont and wish they did!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Never been accused of being a time waster. A disappointment and a tease. Perhaps!"

The day before my first ever meet, I landed in hospital.

He cancelled it while I was sitting in A&E. Years later, he still calls me a time waster

and is one of my best friends

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Never been accused of being a time waster. A disappointment and a tease. Perhaps!

The day before my first ever meet, I landed in hospital.

He cancelled it while I was sitting in A&E. Years later, he still calls me a time waster

and is one of my best friends"

Guess you should be thanking the OP then.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thanks for all the comments people, I was just a little frustrated and clearly it’s a common occurrence

I appreciate everyone who commented and will take it on the chin and move forward

Hope you all have a lot of fun and fingers crossed I might have my own

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Sped read this OP but it seems you did speak to them to check they were genuine so at least you did your homework.

The trouble is.....Fab guarantees nothing, and nor should it. It's just a means to contact someone, much like any other chat/message website or app.

People get let down every day on vanilla dating apps so why should fab be any different?

You just have to suck it up and look for something else to do.

I thought you were about to break out a bit of Alanis Morrissete then - wouldn't that be ironic

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread