FabSwingers.com forum: Why do men…

By *ightkitty4u OP Woman
over a year ago

Epsom

Vanish then reappear?

You’re chatting, all good,

You then arrange a social meet which goes well, all boxes ticked you either play or don’t

You then make tentative plans to meet again

Life gets in the way, his busy your busy… then bam two years pass, you’ve lost years ago forgotten all about them and then poof they reappear in your inbox asking if you remember them and want to meet again?

What the hell is that all about? Happens both on here and on vanilla dating sites.

I don’t get it, are people boomerangs?

Just bugger off and stay there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Vanish then reappear?"

Every time, you are near.

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By *ighty_tightyMan
over a year ago

Norfolk/Suffolk

"Vanish then reappear?

You’re chatting, all good,

You then arrange a social meet which goes well, all boxes ticked you either play or don’t

You then make tentative plans to meet again

What the hell is that all about? Happens both on here and on vanilla dating sites.

I don’t get it, are people boomerangs?

Just bugger off and stay there "

Attention. Boredom.

You spoke to them once, they have nothing better to do and assume you will carry on where you left off.

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By *andyblokeMan
over a year ago

birmingham

people are fickle, people have complex lives, nothing is simple or as it seems on the surface, i guess thats why... take the simple question Hi, how are you... your reply is good or fine thanks... but that isnt true is it? Basically i dont know the answer

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

I live on here. Always findable

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By *atnip make me purrWoman
over a year ago

Reading

I've had this. Trouble is I have no idea who they are. Conversation history backs up that they did speak to you 2 years ago but I just don't have a scooby.

Sometimes it's because they have tried dating but it didn't work out.

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By *anilla switchWoman
over a year ago

Hampshire

It happens with women as well. Also agree people get bored quickly, so much temptation.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nowt as queer as folk.

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

I come and go from here for various reasons..mainly because RL gets in the way or because I get fed up of seeing the same things day after day.

People come and go...its life x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Vanish then reappear?

You’re chatting, all good,

You then arrange a social meet which goes well, all boxes ticked you either play or don’t

You then make tentative plans to meet again

What the hell is that all about? Happens both on here and on vanilla dating sites.

I don’t get it, are people boomerangs?

Just bugger off and stay there "

Haha I did this with you Kitty. We chatted, had a social then I left, came back, messaged you again, left again and now back. Have had the courage to message again even though you pop up on my radar often

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*havent had the courage.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So you meet, have sex, then they leave you alone?? Sounds like my kind of man.

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By *ightkitty4u OP Woman
over a year ago

Epsom

"So you meet, have sex, then they leave you alone?? Sounds like my kind of man. "

Totally but then they bounce back like a bad smell!!

That’s the part I’m questioning why do the come back just F off will ya!!!

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By *ightkitty4u OP Woman
over a year ago

Epsom

"Vanish then reappear?

You’re chatting, all good,

You then arrange a social meet which goes well, all boxes ticked you either play or don’t

You then make tentative plans to meet again

What the hell is that all about? Happens both on here and on vanilla dating sites.

I don’t get it, are people boomerangs?

Just bugger off and stay there

You did!!

don’t remember you

So why come back? And not Just leave me alone?! All hypothetical as this is extremely public!!

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By *inx.x3Woman
over a year ago

Bath

I think that’s just life …. People come and go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Vanish then reappear?

You’re chatting, all good,

You then arrange a social meet which goes well, all boxes ticked you either play or don’t

You then make tentative plans to meet again

What the hell is that all about? Happens both on here and on vanilla dating sites.

I don’t get it, are people boomerangs?

Just bugger off and stay there

You did!!

don’t remember you

So why come back? And not Just leave me alone?! All hypothetical as this is extremely public!! "

Because the last time we messaged, it felt like you weren’t interested so I didn’t want to bother you anymore hence not messaging this time round.. so I have left you alone but saw your post here and it made me chuckle a bit. I understand your frustration.

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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

Because the power of the penis compels you to spread your legs and take it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Because the power of the penis compels you to spread your legs and take it?"

Have you seen a penis?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I reckon it could be because they're not looking, or haven't got the motivation/energy, to maintain a friendship.

That'd be my reason.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

"So you meet, have sex, then they leave you alone?? Sounds like my kind of man.

Totally but then they bounce back like a bad smell!!

That’s the part I’m questioning why do the come back just F off will ya!!!

More sex.

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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago

East London

They still find you attractive.

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By *issEmmWoman
over a year ago

Bournemouth

What annoys me more is how offended they are that you don’t remember them

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By *ightkitty4u OP Woman
over a year ago

Epsom

"What annoys me more is how offended they are that you don’t remember them"

Oh yes they get the right strops, and say things like “you’re the best I’ve ever had how can you not remember”

Just go back under ya rock

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What annoys me more is how offended they are that you don’t remember them"

Never experienced this.

Guess I’m impossible to forget.

Poor other guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Vanish then reappear?

You’re chatting, all good,

You then arrange a social meet which goes well, all boxes ticked you either play or don’t

You then make tentative plans to meet again

What the hell is that all about? Happens both on here and on vanilla dating sites.

I don’t get it, are people boomerangs?

Just bugger off and stay there "

Perhaps some people live this sort of lifestyle more opportunistically. Since many of the relationships formed in the swinging community are quite superficial, it lends itself to being a lifestyle that people can - and will - dip in and out of.

I find great comfort in the fact that I’ve been away from FAB for six months, but have picked up several quite lovely conversations with people, without there being any need to “explain”. But perhaps that is because there was no expectation set around the longevity over which these relationships was being defined.

Why would you want to say “bugger off” to someone whose company you evidently enjoyed, just because their life/choices got in the way of a continuing relationship, for a period of time? I wouldn’t do that with non-swinging friends, who I often don’t see for prolonged periods, but then happily pick up where we left off, when their attention (and mine) comes back into focus.

If they’ve deliberately avoided you, that’s quite another matter however

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By *xydadbodMan
over a year ago

Milton keynes

It also depends on distance as well. I have no problem travelling of course but some may need planning and make arrangements so there is that too

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Yes every man does this

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By *EfellaMan
over a year ago

long eaton

Maybe some develop a relationship with someone, stop fishing/ dating/ swinging during that time, but the relationship ends..

So they start again..

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By *issYeuxBleusWoman
over a year ago

My boudoir - S Wales

I had this just this morning. A message “Hey remember me?”. Im still scratching my head mind. I have a vague memory of him.

If I get cancelled on the second or third time I usually give up on them, ain’t nobody got time for that!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why even are men…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find this happen a lot on fab, that’s why I consider some semi regulars as they might come back every 2-3 months tho, maybe it’s not exactly the same as they don’t go “hey remember me”

I do have the occasional, who gets lost , and then maybe comes back after years, and they do go “hey remember me?”

So strange! I find some get into relationships , at least they admit it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why even are men…"

Good point.

We should ask this.

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

Women too. I had three popped back up in three months. To be fair I had seen them a number of times a few years ago. One had even ghosted me when she found a new fella. God knows why she couldn’t tell me at the time. I took great pleasure in reminding her. Lol.

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By *issEmmWoman
over a year ago

Bournemouth

On the other hand…

Some men use it as a tactic to try and get meets. They try tricking us into thinking we have met them before, because they believe will just jump into bed with them on that oh so solid basis

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By *issEmmWoman
over a year ago

Bournemouth

"Why even are men…

Good point.

We should ask this."

They have dicks. That’s why

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

Try living in Fife. Seems everyone is wanting people under 50, or bi, or say you live too far away. It's like a fucking desert. I have to travel to see people, which is fine, but I chat to a few. I'd like to meet, but they're too far away for regular

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By *elshhung50Man
over a year ago

caerphilly

Well if I chat to a lady and we get on y would you you leave it there if we both make each other smile and feel good

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By *oobyHotwifeWoman
over a year ago

Thurrock

Busy could mean got into a relationship

Relationship ends so they are back on here and regular dating websites

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Vanish then reappear?

Every time, you are near."
from what i hear its bad to be a karen

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women do it too but me personally i vanish because consuela found the lemon pledge

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

They view their contacts as being the seeds they've sown, ready for them to harvest when needed by them. Such needs are evident when they struggle to get anyone else to fuck them, when they're back.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s a crazy crazy world.

I love re-connecting with people I know, especially if they were nice in the past, why should you not take off where things left.

I come and go off line for ages when it takes to much energy than I get back (you know what I mean

) so maybe it was that.

Take it as an opportunity or don’t, that’s your choice.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Vanish then reappear?

Every time, you are near."

Just like you, I want to be, crying in a corner feeling abandoned without hope

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Women do it also.

If someone I've met has stayed on Fab and not been in contact for months - then messages me "just to see how you are" - nah. They're just after a shag. That's not how I operate. I am friends with quite a few men here whom I'm not chatting to all the time - if they pop up, they're always welcome.

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