FabSwingers.com forum: HAM WANKS.

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Best ham to use.

Go.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Any really.

Tightly packed into a pitta.

Held in a boxing glove.

Hold the mayo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thick cut, carvery. With a splash of Mayo to ‘help’ things along.

At least that’s how I……..a mate told me he’d do it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Surely honey glazed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Breaded

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ham shanks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Roast.

And then use spit as lube.

A spit roast for one.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Black pepper

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stay away from the cheap water sliced stuff. I had pro………I mean a mate had problems with its integrity when things got vigorous.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ham wanks are already better than lamb shanks.

Fact.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Stay away from the cheap water sliced stuff. I had pro………I mean a mate had problems with its integrity when things got vigorous."

I’m so imagining this…

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

Surely it's lots of wafer-thin packed in a cup, for a pork-based fleshlight effect?

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By *andyfloss2000Woman
over a year ago

ashford

The medium sliced not to thick but not 2 thin x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Stay away from the cheap water sliced stuff. I had pro………I mean a mate had problems with its integrity when things got vigorous."

Poor cock would look like leather face

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Inbetweeners Jay style.

Mask

Snorkel

Russian credit card hooker on the internet

Hand full of honey roast

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

"Stay away from the cheap water sliced stuff. I had pro………I mean a mate had problems with its integrity when things got vigorous."

A real risk. See comment - the receptacle is all important...so I've read...

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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago

Bristol

That ham with a smiley face in it…at least it looks like it’s enjoying it too!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe even just a tin of spam

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have heard raw liver works well.

Not straight out of the fridge though. Obvs.

(I would imagine

)

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By *ourNextAddictionMan
over a year ago

Somerset

"Inbetweeners Jay style.

Mask

Snorkel

Russian credit card hooker on the internet

Hand full of honey roast"

Is there a dog in this story?

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

Prosciutto to be cosmopolitan

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"That ham with a smiley face in it…at least it looks like it’s enjoying it too!

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By *ithintemptationsCouple
over a year ago

plymouth

some would suggest the whole pig

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

"Any really.

Tightly packed into a pitta.

Held in a boxing glove.

Hold the mayo"

This sounds like it comes from experience

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"That ham with a smiley face in it…at least it looks like it’s enjoying it too!

Billy bear

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"That ham with a smiley face in it…at least it looks like it’s enjoying it too!

The bear one?

I’d feel sad for it.

Looking down at its little face while I’m doing that to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have heard raw liver works well.

Not straight out of the fridge though. Obvs.

(I would imagine

With a nice chianti

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Any really.

Tightly packed into a pitta.

Held in a boxing glove.

Hold the mayo"

Why do I need to hold the mayo? I like using two hands

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ham on the boner

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hog roast.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Prosciutto to be cosmopolitan "

That’s an expensive, posh wank.

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By *ithintemptationsCouple
over a year ago

plymouth

"I have heard raw liver works well.

Not straight out of the fridge though. Obvs.

(I would imagine

)

With a nice chianti

"tries too do the fsss fsss hannible lecter lip encompanyment",ends up looking like bruce forthsyth and jamie oliver

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hog roast.

Spit roast

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have heard raw liver works well.

Not straight out of the fridge though. Obvs.

(I would imagine

)

With a nice chianti

"tries too do the fsss fsss hannible lecter lip encompanyment",ends up looking like bruce forthsyth and jamie oliver"

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By *mashingPumpkinMan
over a year ago

Carmarthen

Honey roast and avocado with sweet chilli sauce

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hog roast.

Spit roast"

Generally cooked that way yes.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Honey roast and avocado with sweet chilli sauce"

Bold.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Honey roast and avocado with sweet chilli sauce"

Fuck sake! These ham wanks are starting to get a bit pricey.

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"Prosciutto to be cosmopolitan

That’s an expensive, posh wank. "

I’ll get a pack from aldi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Prosciutto to be cosmopolitan

That’s an expensive, posh wank.

I’ll get a pack from aldi "

Very frugal of you. I like your thinking.

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"Prosciutto to be cosmopolitan

That’s an expensive, posh wank.

I’ll get a pack from aldi

Very frugal of you. I like your thinking.

It’s tricky to handle though! I’d usually wrap it around something & secure with a COCKtail stick

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By *ou only live onceMan
over a year ago

London

"Honey roast and avocado with sweet chilli sauce"

Chilli, near your cock? A braver man than me!

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

Wiltshire ham with a chorizo up your arse for added shezam.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Prosciutto to be cosmopolitan

That’s an expensive, posh wank.

I’ll get a pack from aldi

Very frugal of you. I like your thinking.

It’s tricky to handle though! I’d usually wrap it around something & secure with a COCKtail stick"

You need a risk assessment for that?

Sounds like a danger wank.

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

"Prosciutto to be cosmopolitan

That’s an expensive, posh wank.

I’ll get a pack from aldi

Very frugal of you. I like your thinking.

It’s tricky to handle though! I’d usually wrap it around something & secure with a COCKtail stick

You need a risk assessment for that?

Sounds like a danger wank. "

I’ll rethink it

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By *mashingPumpkinMan
over a year ago

Carmarthen

"Honey roast and avocado with sweet chilli sauce

Chilli, near your cock? A braver man than me!

Sweet chilli sauce just gives you a warm tingle, just make sure no seeds get in the eye.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Wiltshire ham with a chorizo up your arse for added shezam.

Added shezham.

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