FabSwingers.com forum: Half Man Half Biscuit

By *uckOfTheBay OP Man
over a year ago

Mold

Who remembers this bunch of fun nonsense?

With such songs as

The Trumpton Riots;

Knobheads on Quiz Shows;and

Len Ganley Stance

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By *ittleAcornMan
over a year ago

visiting the beach

Joy Division Oven Gloves.

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By *RANDMRSJAECouple
over a year ago

chester

Yes!!! I have seen them performing

what a blast from the past!!

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By *uckOfTheBay OP Man
over a year ago

Mold

What Made Columbia Famous has Made a Prick Out of You!

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

I have tickets to see them in October

Such an underrated band.

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By *hamrock 1888Man
over a year ago

on tour

All I want for Christmas is a dukla Prague away kit!

All gargoyles look like Bob Todd

Lyrical genius.....and a bit mental!

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

I love them. National Shite Day will always coax a smile from me.

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple
over a year ago

in Lancashire

Under rated band, cracking lyrics ..

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"All I want for Christmas is a dukla Prague away kit!

Lyrical genius.....and a bit mental!

This is the right answer!!!

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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago

Hull

"I love them. National Shite Day will always coax a smile from me."

At my friends funeral, they played it as we were all leaving the chapel. People started smiling and it was just so typical of him to have that, it reminded us to celebrate him and not just mourn and be sad.

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

I thought this was going to be a tread about me!

I remember them from the 90's. I've got their 'This Leaden Pall' album somewhere in the loft.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She’s got Dickie Davies eyes

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Love 'em

Seen live probably 20 odd times now.

All the albums

Various t shirts

And a pair of Joy Division Oven Gloves before

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I love them. National Shite Day will always coax a smile from me.

Should have been "Tending the wrong grave for 23 years"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Joy Division Oven Gloves."

Had a pair, bought off Ebay

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have tickets to see them in October

Such an underrated band. "

Not doing much live this year....

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By *thLincsCpleCouple
over a year ago

Barton upon Humber

Still got an album somewhere, Time Flies by, when you’re the driver of a train, Fucking hell it’s Fred Tutmus, and the classic lyrics, Mary had a little lamb, the doctors were astounded, everywhere Mary went gynaecologists surrounded lol. Certainly made me chuckle when I got it.

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By *unfeistyCouple
over a year ago

Margate

All gargoyles look like Bob Todd

Only 99 per cent

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By *bi HaiveMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Cheeseville, Somerset

'Reflections in a Flat' is a work of lyrical genius.

"Oh darling sugar honey

When it was nice and sunny

And when I had some money

We would go and see Echo And The Bunny

…men

Since I was eight I’ve loved you

Through garden gates I’ve shoved you

Then there’s the time I slashed you

And you had to go to hospital

Now you are gone forever

Shot by your Uncle Trevor

My story seems so tragic

Ali Bongo’s good at contortionism

Oh he’s much better than David Nixon ever was

Woh oh oh oo-ooh

Slowly I picked my life up

Now I go and pick the wife up

She works at Marks & Spencer’s

La la la Lech Walesas

When Cupid threw her last dart

You, girl, were still in my heart

I love you more than ever

Even though I married Trevor"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Still got an album somewhere, Time Flies by, when you’re the driver of a train, Fucking hell it’s Fred Tutmus, and the classic lyrics, Mary had a little lamb, the doctors were astounded, everywhere Mary went gynaecologists surrounded lol. Certainly made me chuckle when I got it."

Back at the DHSS..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"'Reflections in a Flat' is a work of lyrical genius.

"Oh darling sugar honey

When it was nice and sunny

And when I had some money

We would go and see Echo And The Bunny

…men

Since I was eight I’ve loved you

Through garden gates I’ve shoved you

Then there’s the time I slashed you

And you had to go to hospital

Now you are gone forever

Shot by your Uncle Trevor

My story seems so tragic

Ali Bongo’s good at contortionism

Oh he’s much better than David Nixon ever was

Woh oh oh oo-ooh

Slowly I picked my life up

Now I go and pick the wife up

She works at Marks & Spencer’s

La la la Lech Walesas

When Cupid threw her last dart

You, girl, were still in my heart

I love you more than ever

Even though I married Trevor"

Classic NB lyrical genius

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By *antricSeeker60Man
over a year ago

Durham

It must be national shite day.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Class band.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Black Satin Tour Jacket with detachable sleeves was pretty dark, along with Excavating Rita

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By *ad Bod AdonisMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

I hate Nerys Hughes!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Midnight Mass Murder is a 1 and half mins bunch of joy

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

"I love them. National Shite Day will always coax a smile from me.

I do love that, a sad occasion but a lovely reminder of him.

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By *xmfrvnMan
over a year ago

Stoke-on-Trent

A man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets

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By *ost SockMan
over a year ago

West Wales and Cardiff

“Fun nonsense”?!

I would argue that Nigel is one of the great chroniclers of life on this ridiculous island.

All together now (to the tune of “He’s got the whole world in his hands”)…..

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill….

…Now we all go to boxercise

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By *ost SockMan
over a year ago

West Wales and Cardiff

"'Reflections in a Flat' is a work of lyrical genius.

"Oh darling sugar honey

When it was nice and sunny

And when I had some money

We would go and see Echo And The Bunny

…men

Since I was eight I’ve loved you

Through garden gates I’ve shoved you

Then there’s the time I slashed you

And you had to go to hospital

Now you are gone forever

Shot by your Uncle Trevor

My story seems so tragic

Ali Bongo’s good at contortionism

Oh he’s much better than David Nixon ever was

Woh oh oh oo-ooh

Slowly I picked my life up

Now I go and pick the wife up

She works at Marks & Spencer’s

La la la Lech Walesas

When Cupid threw her last dart

You, girl, were still in my heart

I love you more than ever

Even though I married Trevor"

Thank you. The pause between “bunny” and “men” is one of THE great moments in all recorded music

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By *ad Bod AdonisMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"“Fun nonsense”?!

I would argue that Nigel is one of the great chroniclers of life on this ridiculous island.

All together now (to the tune of “He’s got the whole world in his hands”)…..

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill….

…Now we all go to boxercise

I've always said there was a certain poetry to their lyrics.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Fun nonsense”?!

I would argue that Nigel is one of the great chroniclers of life on this ridiculous island.

All together now (to the tune of “He’s got the whole world in his hands”)…..

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill….

…Now we all go to boxercise

I've got a German Shepherd dog called Prince.....

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By *ost SockMan
over a year ago

West Wales and Cardiff

"“Fun nonsense”?!

I would argue that Nigel is one of the great chroniclers of life on this ridiculous island.

All together now (to the tune of “He’s got the whole world in his hands”)…..

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill….

…Now we all go to boxercise

I've got a German Shepherd dog called Prince....."

The one called Sheba died

They’ve got nothing but total respect for

Nothing but total respect for

Nothing but total respect for…

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/04/22 16:07:39]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Me girlfriend looks like Peggy Mount,

What am I supposed to do?

I’m up the creek, never mind the paddle, boy,

I haven’t even got a canoe.

Sold my soul to arctic roll,

I go to hell on a red skidoo

I did the Shake n vac

It broke me f*****g back

And me library books are nine months overdue

Knock, knock, who’s there?

The patron saint of Llandudno,

The patron saint of Llandudno, who

Tony Bastable

You scratch my back, and I all scratch yours

And I’ll be in heaven before you,

I love you,

( Because you,

Look like Jim Reeves )

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"“Fun nonsense”?!

I would argue that Nigel is one of the great chroniclers of life on this ridiculous island.

All together now (to the tune of “He’s got the whole world in his hands”)…..

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill….

…Now we all go to boxercise

I've got a German Shepherd dog called Prince.....

The one called Sheba died

They’ve got nothing but total respect for

Nothing but total respect for

Nothing but total respect for…"

Annie Lennox

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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago

Stoke area

"“Fun nonsense”?!

I would argue that Nigel is one of the great chroniclers of life on this ridiculous island.

All together now (to the tune of “He’s got the whole world in his hands”)…..

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill….

…Now we all go to boxercise

I've got a German Shepherd dog called Prince.....

The one called Sheba died

They’ve got nothing but total respect for

Nothing but total respect for

Nothing but total respect for…"

Love this song..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I had agoraphobia

And if I had claustrophobia

Trapped inside my porch

Things would be bleak

Especially midweek

Your weird dreams

Don’t impress in any way

In dreams

Weird things are mundane and everyday

Strange to me would be

Buying a loaf

And coming straight home

Try and get your arse downtown next week

I’m going to prove once and for all

To the LTA hey-hey-hey

That Tim and Greg are not golden boys

They are in fact automatons

I’ve seen the chips and wires

And the circuit boards

“The reservoirs are colder

And deeper than you think”

Well stop, wait a minute Mr Spokesman

You don’t know what I think

Is your lake about

(hmm now let’s see)

A hundred miles deep

And ninety below?

And is it home to sharks?

It’s gonna end up

With the storming of a brothel in Palermo

Sniffer dogs in fluorescent bibs

I’ve seen the chips and wires

I’ve seen the circuit boards

I’ve seen the chips and wires

I’ve seen the circuit boards

This is me pleading for some civic pride

Using or losing the park and ride

Twin town said we just weren’t cool

So now we got a suicide pact with Goole

I’ve seen the chips and wires

I’ve seen the circuit boards

I’ve seen the chips and wires

I’ve seen the circuit boards

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd dearly love to walk past a house to see someone in the porch wondering to go out or not

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

Butter milk and cheese and an equilateral chain saw!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Butter milk and cheese and an equilateral chain saw!"

They've been cooking on Blue Peter....

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By *ost SockMan
over a year ago

West Wales and Cardiff

"“Fun nonsense”?!

I would argue that Nigel is one of the great chroniclers of life on this ridiculous island.

All together now (to the tune of “He’s got the whole world in his hands”)…..

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill

We made lots of good friends on Henman Hill….

…Now we all go to boxercise

I've got a German Shepherd dog called Prince.....

The one called Sheba died

They’ve got nothing but total respect for

Nothing but total respect for

Nothing but total respect for…

Annie Lennox"

Good work, sir

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry bit your username would make a great HMHB track

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Your charmless associates in a stretch limousine......

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By *entBarryUKMan
over a year ago

Ashford

I've been to a post punk postcard fayre!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I must invest in a new pair.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did have a pair bought of a famous auction site

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By *uffolkClareClactonDaveCouple
over a year ago

Felixstowe/Clacton-on-Sea

"There's a man with a mullet going mad with a mallet in Millets"

National Shite Day

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sixteen teams are taking part,

Sixteen camps of hope.

Some contain top, top players.....

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By *uffolkClareClactonDaveCouple
over a year ago

Felixstowe/Clacton-on-Sea

That's from the album "Back in the DHSS", released in 1986 if memory serves and championed by the late, great John Peel.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Alongside such classics as

Venus in Flares

Reflections in a Flat

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

I've heard of them but I don't think I've ever heard any of their stuff. So I've looked them up on Spotify and am having a good laugh.

The album titles Achtung Bono and Trouble Over Bridgewater are just brilliant!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now they all ageing a little the irony of the latest release....

The Voltarol Years

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've heard of them but I don't think I've ever heard any of their stuff. So I've looked them up on Spotify and am having a good laugh.

The album titles Achtung Bono and Trouble Over Bridgewater are just brilliant!

The writing by NB is legendary.

Rumours were abound that Monty Don named his 2 labradors Neil and Nigel as a tribute to HMHB.

Backed up by the first line of "Every time a bell rings (I hate you some more)" being...

"Ground Control to Monty Don"....

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By *uffolkClareClactonDaveCouple
over a year ago

Felixstowe/Clacton-on-Sea

"I've heard of them but I don't think I've ever heard any of their stuff. So I've looked them up on Spotify and am having a good laugh.

The album titles Achtung Bono and Trouble Over Bridgewater are just brilliant!

My favourite album title by HMHB is "Voyage to the Bottom of the Road"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've heard of them but I don't think I've ever heard any of their stuff. So I've looked them up on Spotify and am having a good laugh.

The album titles Achtung Bono and Trouble Over Bridgewater are just brilliant!

My favourite album title by HMHB is "Voyage to the Bottom of the Road"

Love them all....

If forced to choose toss up between CSI:Ambleside or Cammell Laird Social Club

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By *ost SockMan
over a year ago

West Wales and Cardiff

"I've heard of them but I don't think I've ever heard any of their stuff. So I've looked them up on Spotify and am having a good laugh.

The album titles Achtung Bono and Trouble Over Bridgewater are just brilliant!

My favourite album title by HMHB is "Voyage to the Bottom of the Road"

Love them all....

If forced to choose toss up between CSI:Ambleside or Cammell Laird Social Club"

Got HMHB lyrics on the brain today. Current fave:

“My Uncle Charlie is a cynical man

His wife’s a touch sceptical too

They’ve got a sticker on the back

of their car that says

We’ve seen the prices at the zoo”

Nigel is brilliant

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You'll relate something every day of your life to HMHB lyrics

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By *lsfukmeMan
over a year ago

slough

Brilliant and still one of my favourite bands. You can’t go wrong with song titles like Who’s afraid of Virginia Wade or lyrics like…

They’ve been cooking on Blue Peter

Now sampling the dishes

I don’t normally like tomatoes John

But this is delicious!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Brilliant and still one of my favourite bands. You can’t go wrong with song titles like Who’s afraid of Virginia Wade or lyrics like…

They’ve been cooking on Blue Peter

Now sampling the dishes

I don’t normally like tomatoes John

But this is delicious!"

That may Irk the Purists

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