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Self depreciation

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Do you put yourself down before others do? I have met quite a few people who do, yet I have found them very sexy.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham

Yep, always the first to make a fat joke at my expense....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I seem to do it. Need to work on my self esteem I guess. X

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

such an unattractive quality followed by the fawnini imho

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham


"such an unattractive quality followed by the fawnini imho"

The what??

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"such an unattractive quality followed by the fawnini imho"

Fawnini?

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"Do you put yourself down before others do? I have met quite a few people who do, yet I have found them very sexy."
Have you found them sexy because of it?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

fawning

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Do you put yourself down before others do? I have met quite a few people who do, yet I have found them very sexy.Have you found them sexy because of it?"

Nooooo I prefer confidence, and I am surprised when people who I think should have it, don't.

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By *ub bbwWoman
over a year ago

oldbury

I try not to but sometimes if struggling with my depression I find myself doubting myself and questioning myself.

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"Do you put yourself down before others do? I have met quite a few people who do, yet I have found them very sexy.Have you found them sexy because of it?

Nooooo I prefer confidence, and I am surprised when people who I think should have it, don't."
See i dont think that self depreciation and lack of confidence always go hand in hand. My mind goes blank when i hear someone doing it....it bores me rigid and frigid.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Self deprecation is better than boastful, full of themselves types. However, if it's done to overkill it can come across as 'give me a compliment and say I'm nice really'. A half way house where you're modest but confident is the best way to be IMO xx

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"Self deprecation is better than boastful, full of themselves types. However, if it's done to overkill it can come across as 'give me a compliment and say I'm nice really'. A half way house where you're modest but confident is the best way to be IMO xx"

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

[Removed by poster at 25/10/12 19:25:41]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do sometimes, but it comes from being put down by people in my past. After while you start to believe it.

I'm.much better now that I've met people wholike me for me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I am the first to take the piss out of myself but I don't see that as self depreciation. My confidence waivers depending on my mood. Yesterday was a shocker, but most days I am happy as Larry and feel great.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I do sometimes, but it comes from being put down by people in my past. After while you start to believe it.

I'm.much better now that I've met people wholike me for me. "

Same here. I try to be confident and some nice people on here are helping with that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Interesting. From my own point of _iew, I hold no notions of vanity about myself - Im quite aware of who and what I am.

Some may see the way I describe myself as self-depreciation but it isn't. I recoil at any attempts made to try to turn it around with compliments (or as Diamondsmiles says, fawning).

Simply because I have the body of the Pilsbury Dough Boy, it doesn't mean I don't have enough self-confidence and self-assurance to fill a swimming pool.

I just temper it with a well grounded self awareness. Because if I didn't, I'd just be an 'orrible twunt!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Do you put yourself down before others do? I have met quite a few people who do, yet I have found them very sexy.Have you found them sexy because of it?

Nooooo I prefer confidence, and I am surprised when people who I think should have it, don't.See i dont think that self depreciation and lack of confidence always go hand in hand. My mind goes blank when i hear someone doing it....it bores me rigid and frigid. "

See now I think there is a link between self depreciation and confidence.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"Do you put yourself down before others do? I have met quite a few people who do, yet I have found them very sexy.Have you found them sexy because of it?

Nooooo I prefer confidence, and I am surprised when people who I think should have it, don't.See i dont think that self depreciation and lack of confidence always go hand in hand. My mind goes blank when i hear someone doing it....it bores me rigid and frigid.

See now I think there is a link between self depreciation and confidence."

I have to agree with femme, im sure if where honest even the most confident can have a moments wobble every now and again, but to me self depreciation is someone who whinges and whines constantly about themselves just hoping they are going to get complements.

I like to think im pretty self aware, im an overweight, lates 40's average looking woman thats been blessed with a nice smile. I have all the time in the world for people with confidence issues but i cannot abide people that i class as self depreciating

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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"Do you put yourself down before others do? I have met quite a few people who do, yet I have found them very sexy.Have you found them sexy because of it?

Nooooo I prefer confidence, and I am surprised when people who I think should have it, don't.See i dont think that self depreciation and lack of confidence always go hand in hand. My mind goes blank when i hear someone doing it....it bores me rigid and frigid.

See now I think there is a link between self depreciation and confidence."
On the odd occasion yes, most of the time no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do it but its my form of wit - and I dont mean it seriously !!!! just showing I can laugh at myself too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know I am weird/eccentric/may be a few fish knives short of a full canteen, and crack jokes about myself often.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do you put yourself down before others do? I have met quite a few people who do, yet I have found them very sexy.Have you found them sexy because of it?

Nooooo I prefer confidence, and I am surprised when people who I think should have it, don't.See i dont think that self depreciation and lack of confidence always go hand in hand. My mind goes blank when i hear someone doing it....it bores me rigid and frigid.

See now I think there is a link between self depreciation and confidence.

I have to agree with femme, im sure if where honest even the most confident can have a moments wobble every now and again, but to me self depreciation is someone who whinges and whines constantly about themselves just hoping they are going to get complements.

I like to think im pretty self aware, im an overweight, lates 40's average looking woman thats been blessed with a nice smile. I have all the time in the world for people with confidence issues but i cannot abide people that i class as self depreciating"

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By *he_original_poloWoman
over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester


"Do you put yourself down before others do? I have met quite a few people who do, yet I have found them very sexy."

Never.

I can make jokes...... but it is because I find it funny. If someone does it and does it in a clever witty way... as in it is funny... cool. But not too often.

When people do it and are serious or just fishing for compliments, I find it a deeply unattractive activity...... along with the act of rushing in to say "oh no you're not" and in doing so encouraging the behaviour to continue.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do you put yourself down before others do? I have met quite a few people who do, yet I have found them very sexy."

yes i often put myself down before others do, was bullied through out my childhood so its kinda my own self defense if i pull a fat joke before they stick a punch in. I find i do it more when it comes to people who haven't physically met me yet, and once they get over the initial shock of my size then i relax more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Do you put yourself down before others do? I have met quite a few people who do, yet I have found them very sexy."
Are you actually meaning self-deprecation, or is actually self-effacing which you find sexy? I know I do - makes me feel that a woman is almost in my hands (Oh what a perv I am!), but of course, with many, it is a well-rehearsed 'act'.... but I'm a sucker for it anyway, so... hey-ho!

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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago

glasgow

i have to be self depreciating,just to prevent people feeling totally unworthy in my presence.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Interesting. From my own point of _iew, I hold no notions of vanity about myself - Im quite aware of who and what I am.

Some may see the way I describe myself as self-depreciation but it isn't. I recoil at any attempts made to try to turn it around with compliments (or as Diamondsmiles says, fawning).

Simply because I have the body of the Pilsbury Dough Boy, it doesn't mean I don't have enough self-confidence and self-assurance to fill a swimming pool.

I just temper it with a well grounded self awareness. Because if I didn't, I'd just be an 'orrible twunt!"

I'm a bit like this...I know my flaws and my qualities, but I don't expect someone to tell me I don't have a fat ass when I make a joke about it because I clearly do have a fat ass. I get irritated by people who will try the flattery because I just see it as fake compliments which mean nothing and just make me uncomfortable...and kill the joke I was making too!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't put myself down but I am realistic. I don't take myself seriously and sometimes people mistake my comments as putting myself down when actually I'm just having a laugh.

I don't like it when people think I'm doing it for attention or for compliments as I don't really like compliments or attention. If I can make someone smile then that's the kind of compliment I like.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Self depreciation is not attractive especially those who do it in an attempt to elicit some sort of reassurance or false compliment from others.

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn


"Self depreciation is not attractive especially those who do it in an attempt to elicit some sort of reassurance or false compliment from others.

"

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By *empting Devil.Woman
over a year ago

Sheffield

I have an honest _iew of myself and won't be lied to.

But then I won't be so rude as to question another person's opinion and knowledge of what they find attractive.

So: " you're never a size 14" will get dismissed but "I think your tummy is lovely" will get a thank you.

But people who do it just to get compliments are on a hiding to nothing with me.

And if I want a compliment I will brazenly ask for one! It may not have as much value as one out of the blue but it has more value than a pity compliment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I find it really irritating and childish when people put themselves down in an attempt to gsain a compliment, people who say things like, I'm so fat' when they are a size 0 etc.

But people also don't take warmly to people who are positive about themselves and these people get tarred with the 'up their own arse, egotistical' etc.

I know exactly what my faults are. I am mid 40s, getting a few lines, am a big girl with a flabby tummy. But on the positive side I am attractive, I have great curves and I'm intelligent. There are many positives about me so I'm ok with myself really.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Self deprecation is better than boastful, full of themselves types. However, if it's done to overkill it can come across as 'give me a compliment and say I'm nice really'. A half way house where you're modest but confident is the best way to be IMO xx"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Im always makin out im super lush lol n gigglin bout it. Its more fun to pretend yr lush innit stay deluded

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